Epic blowout with bpd/npd girl

Lvdegen

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I am fully aware of discard cycles with npds and im guessing they are the samr for bpd..i mysrlf in someehat of a narc maybe some bpd traits but not heavy on the bpd and unconvential (this bpd even told me that about being unconventional)..Started hanging out with this girl 2 months ago. Knew of her and she knows mutual people..She is bpd with npd...she is on lexapro and Xanax so she is in fact...i have been around a full blown narc for 9 years (non sexual) and have experienced all kinds of things discards idealization abuse mental physical etc so I'm somewhat seasoned...but this time the dynamic was different with this other girl...we were "dating" in her words...had sex a couple times hung out all the time slept together all the time.

Thru out the time we were speaking she was in contact with an ex that lived with her for 6 months..she likes live in BFs lol. I'm 34 (she's 28) got a six pack eat clean drive a nice car educated good looking etc...this other dude was 20 skinny lkke 110 lbs no lie...bisexual ate fast food smoked etc etc. So obviously no competition just a whole different type of person..but I know she is bpdnpd so they mirror etc to get something...in the case with me she needed companionship and somebody to sleep with bf date whatever...we were affectionate alot passionate kissing hand holding cuddling etc...but I knew she was fake most of the time. But she did feel comfortable around me but at the same time said she felt intimated by me which was good. She's use to running dudes over...dudes have gotten her all kinds of things even a house!! So I was just taking out to little meals and maybe get her nails done and that's it i probably spent no more than 500 on her in 2 months lol..sure I would drive her to whatever she needed to do and I didn't care. We had sex and we slept every night together..i was giving her companionship and she was giving me companionship..sure she try to hit me up for gifts here and there but I'm not a fool and I know her track record and basically got her no gifts whatsoever..yet i get things all these guys wanted from her for a cheap price lol.

We had one blowup a while back didn't talk for a few days then we contacted each other and things were fine from there but she was still texting the 20 yr old and even mentioned he was possibly coming to See her at the end of this month..she was just weird super sensitive..like if I did something minute she would get really weird and standoffish...ome time I asked why she was getting shy and that night she was giving me negative body language all night another time she demanded my card to buy something online and I said no she then said sorry for getting mad and I didn't even know she was mad lol..the reason is and I told her is that she can talk to the 20 yr old all she wants but I'm not investing as long as they are texting..lets face it 20 yr old has nothing on me so she wants to talk but I'm not gonna buy anything I was honestly laughing in her face about how she acts like she is high and mighty yet she is texting some 20 yr old who at one point had rotting teeth because he didn't brush when he had braces.

She knew but she said she likes to control guys and younger ones are easier and older ones arent...she also went on to say that usually she treats older guys as sugar daddys and I was an "excpetion" lol cuz I was seriously buying her zero just 20 dollar meals.

This whole time the 20 yr old coming to drive from out of stste kind of loomed over I didn't really talk about it but I knew there was a good chance of getting discarded right before the Dude was coming so I refused to get her anything because I know st the end of the day it would be a total waste.

2 nights ago I decided to text this other girl to see a movie to hedge my bet because the night before in bed her body language was getting cold so I felt something coming ..we go see a movie and I get a text from psycho...she asks me to go to Macy's to return someybujg i say let's go tomorrow I'm at the gym she said ok my mom will take me so I said I'll come over after the gym and she said ok.

I start to go to her house and text her and say I'm coming..she says "babe" don't because she is eating out wi th her mom and she'll text when she gets home I say ok...she texts later and says I'm going to bed early (it's 11) because I have blah blah to do. This is very uncharacteristic of her because she wants me around all the time..i try to call her no answer I know something is up.then I start texting what is wrong? Then she texts so I call and she doesn't answer so now I know something is really up....this goes on and I just start saying wtf is wrong with u she then goes on to text i just wanna be alone...i text whatever she refuses to amswer so then I'm finally like"if ur upset I didn't leave the gym to take u then I'm sorry didn't know it would upset u" because that is literally what it was she felt so hurt I didn't drop everything for her...then we get into sh1t talking to each other and starts asking me to buy her a chair that j was sitting on that she broke when she sat on top of me and to apologize to her for sending "horrific" messages abiit her going to macys with her mom whchh i never did I said send me a screenshot of what she was talking about but never did of cousre...we go at for hours she starts naming this that this that about me I fire back..she knows I'm not a pushover and she even told me before she wouldn't want to get into a full blown argument with me. I held back alot because she is mentally screwed up but I did say some things back...she told me guys get scared when she gets crazy and don't say anything back so she probably wasn't use to people arguing back..she was doing self projection identication at points and she just had alot of stuff on her list of things about me..she painted me black..i was saying messed up things back and said u wanna fix things let's fix it now if not then don't then she went on to say how it's tempting and how I'm cool and cute but then said ljbf i said no..we went back and forth for hours I said f it go be with whoever I don't give a f. Went to sleep

The next day I'm a little distraught obviously and I get a text from the narc I've known for 9 years (they know each other) she says so and so just texted me saying u said this that about me..the only thing I said really was that she was a narcissistic disordered person lol..she then texted me she's done with me I'm blocked yada yada I said go f urself both of u are pieces of sh1t..ive been thru 100 we are done phases so I'm not even worried....i text the bpd and tell her to stop texting her...we get into again for hours I say go be with someone else u won we aren't gonna talk i will leave u alone so u won..sent her a screen shot of the other girl saying she's coming to my house at 7..she called me immature for that pretty sure that zinged her tho lol...more sh1t talking between me and her i start saying messed up things but did significantly hold back she on the other hand let it all out but at the end of the day I don't care what she says because she can't phase me been numb from the other narc for years..i then go on to say she has bpd comorbid with npd antisocial and schizoid ...bssixally say go be with rotting teeth boy idgaf etc etc..she then says blah blah ur blocked.

I text her later on from my other number and say we said whatever to each other I'm not hurt in the slightest I'm sorry ur sorry so it's all whatever (I just kept saying whatever to keep it vague) then said we can be friends we can be enemies we can be frenimies be whatever we have no business dating each other ....i then said i can take her to her appointments unless it would too much for her to handle..i then said i sent her and edible hello kitty arrangement(inside joke) but canceled the order after I got the text from the narc.. i ended it with u wanna talknto me then talk to me u don't then don't we can be whatever so do whatever u want it's the US of A land of the free lolol.

I can guarantee the 20 yr old is coming now for sure...thats fine i got sh1 t to do..but now the question is will she cycle back around? The narc of 9 years got into epic epic things with me I have said the most fd up things to her but it was figt8ng back obviously but like i said it was never in a dating capacstiy...so I have no idea if she will hoover..i can kind of see the 20 yr old and her having a falling out or him going back to his state once it gets bad with her and possibly coming around..she is a hermit she doesnt leave her house barely and i live literslly 2 miles from her...but after what she was saying about all the issues she had I have no idea ...part of me says it's 60/40 She contacts me another part is saying she may never...everytime I had a blowup eith the other narc I was like no way will we ever talk again after what was said and done and I have obviously been wrong on that who knows.
 
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xstang77

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Will she cycle around to further **** with your head and continue to use you as a doormat? Absolutely. You say your a well off guy then get the hell away from this pos I got a headache just reading your story your right in her grips where she wants you.stop showing her any emotion when she does or doesn't act a certain way. Your wasting your time drop her it will only get worse.
 

Lvdegen

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Will she cycle around to further **** with your head and continue to use you as a doormat? Absolutely. You say your a well off guy then get the hell away from this pos I got a headache just reading your story your right in her grips where she wants you.stop showing her any emotion when she does or doesn't act a certain way. Your wasting your time drop her it will only get worse.
Its more of entertainment value..I'm not texting I love her miss her or anything..shes a supply source to me I don't get feelings of sentiment
 

xstang77

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She's getting reactions out of you though when you get upset with her and text just that feeds into her. Not trying to come off as an ass but trust me and plenty other guys here it's not worth it, she's on a path of self destruction and she'll happily take you down first.
 

Lvdegen

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She's getting reactions out of you though when you get upset with her and text just that feeds into her. Not trying to come off as an ass but trust me and plenty other guys here it's not worth it, she's on a path of self destruction and she'll happily take you down first.
That's fine she's getting reactions out of me I get reactions out her...i even told her yesterday she'll never win against me
 

xstang77

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So what are you trying to accomplish here then? Wondering if she'll contact you again? I can almost bet yes.
 

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Nah you f**ked up, there's so many things you did wrong here that in the end it made rotten teeth boy more attractive and higher status than you.

You argued with her, you said things that was messed up. She likes to control guys but she found something to control you with and thats your emotions. Then sending her pictures of other girls texts?? She really did win. I doubt she'll contact you right now, if ever.
 

dustmuffin

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That's fine she's getting reactions out of me I get reactions out her...i even told her yesterday she'll never win against me
Really? Why would you want to play her game? Do you enjoy the drama and turmoil? If you have a lot going for you why would you put up with this s hit? You should run from her as fast as you can.
 

Lvdegen

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Nah you f**ked up, there's so many things you did wrong here that in the end it made rotten teeth boy more attractive and higher status than you.

You argued with her, you said things that was messed up. She likes to control guys but she found something to control you with and thats your emotions. Then sending her pictures of other girls texts?? She really did win. I doubt she'll contact you right now, if ever.
First off that 20 yr old drives a beater...i got a blacked out 2016 Benz lol...20 yr old will either go back home to his state because he doesn't live here or will leave because she will make him her slave..whats wrong with showing texts I did it other fight and we talked after..she doesn't leave the house she has to revert back to meeting strangers off the internet who are unfamiliar so I don't think there's 0 chance..yes I do enjoy the turmoil and drama it keeps days exciting
 
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WitnessGR

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If you were as high value as you seem to think you are, you wouldn't even entertain this ****... Dealing with a npd person for 9 years and bpd/npd person just seems like you have a lack of options.

The unfortunate part is you feel that you are in total control, like you have a handle on things, truth is, the inverse is true, you are playing in their frame and you do not respect your time and sanity.

Delete this
 

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

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Yea but 20 yr old will either go back home to his state because he doesn't live here or will leave because she will make him her slave..whats wrong with showing texts I did it other fight and we talked after..she doesn't leave the house she has to revert back to meeting strangers off the internet who are unfamiliar so I don't think there's 0 chance..yes I do enjoy the turmoil and drama it keeps days exciting
Don't you understand what's going on here? YOU are now in the same level as this guy, she sees you as another orbiter to play around with. To control you. That's how BPDs win, they seek out the emotional men to control. She will make him her slave and when shes done with him if she doesn't find someone else between that time she'll go to you and play the same games. She doesn't see the challenge in you. She doesn't seek a man to argue back and forth with her. You may find this drama "fun" but its not making her interest level go higher for you, it's actually going below to the point that if this continues she'll just see you as annoying and will definitely discard you for good. If not already.

BPDs truly seek out the sociopath types, now those are the real challenge for BPDs, the types who truly don't give a f**k and if you would of kept your cool when she went out with her mom and left her alone regardless of how it went down. This entire thing would of gone differently. But you pursued and questioned her. Which led to this argument and you falling for the bait. Leave this one be OP. You won't win this I'm telling you right now.
 

Lvdegen

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Don't you understand what's going on here? YOU are now in the same level as this guy, she sees you as another orbiter to play around with. To control you. That's how BPDs win, they seek out the emotional men to control. She will make him her slave and when shes done with him if she doesn't find someone else between that time she'll go to you and play the same games. She doesn't see the challenge in you. She doesn't seek a man to argue back and forth with her. You may find this drama "fun" but its not making her interest level go higher for you, it's actually going below to the point that if this continues she'll just see you as annoying and will definitely discard you for good. If not already.

BPDs truly seek out the sociopath types, now those are the real challenge for BPDs, the types who truly don't give a f**k and if you would of kept your cool when she went out with her mom and left her alone regardless of how it went down. This entire thing would of gone differently. But you pursued and questioned her. Which led to this argument and you falling for the bait. Leave this one be OP. You won't win this I'm telling you right now.
All in all nobody can win against a bpd/ npd...usually I might show emotions in the heat of the moment and fight fire with fire but after a day I'm done...theres no texting from me ever..yesterday was the last time I will text until if she comes around..with her I've said sh1 t to her she has never heard before and she has never dealt with anyone like me hence why she said I'm unconventional. I told her to be with the other dude I said idgaf...but next time you're right gotta keep my cool no matter what but overall I'm an aggressive confrontational person..i think if there's no texts from me and she knows I know 20 yr old is there it will show I don't give a f..i honestly don't care if that dude is there it will never make it...she told him about me so I'm pretty sure she's gonna name drop me to him when he acts out and he won't take it. Bottom line u gotta be a stra8ght up psychopath to handle someone like her but I don't see how that is sustainable way to many blowups...im level headed but do have npd tendencies which allows me to counter pe9lle like her but in a more aggressive way but she would never stay eith a sociopath for a long amount of time..but we had sex multiple times and I was barley giving her anything while other dudes drop all kinds on her so that does show I am not like the rest and she cannot c9nttol me I'm confrontational and she even said it...shes intimidated by me so she has respect in a sense..i do show her my feelings but for sure not in a wimp way saying oh I miss u let's get lunch type sh 1t. I'm leaving her alone anyways there is no way I will initiate because I know bpds take that as weakness and pounce...i talk in a combative challenging way to her meaning I don't respect her so called omnipotence.
 
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Lvdegen

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If you were as high value as you seem to think you are, you wouldn't even entertain this ****... Dealing with a npd person for 9 years and bpd/npd person just seems like you have a lack of options.

The unfortunate part is you feel that you are in total control, like you have a handle on things, truth is, the inverse is true, you are playing in their frame and you do not respect your time and sanity.

Delete this
Not in total control but I feel with my past experience with a full blown npd for 9 years I can manage it alot better than most
 

marmel75

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So what are you trying to accomplish here then? Wondering if she'll contact you again? I can almost bet yes.
Isn't amazing how all these dudes that are so "hot with 6 packs" and can have all these "women" seem to always be the ones pretending like they "won" with these type of chicks and then trying to figure out if they will come back? If you have so many women then why would you care?

It's so easy to tell when people are full of it since they post stuff that makes zero sense if that is truly what was happening.
 

Lvdegen

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ahh famous last words with a bpd :rolleyes:

OP, update us in a few weeks when you've been dragged to the very brink of psych ward hospitalization and are suffering from major depression, PTSD, and anxiety disorder
Here's the thing like i said I've been involved with a npd for 9 years and she is a dime...ive been thru 100 cycles of value devalue and very traumatiz9ng things eith her but now I am stronger and her npd has rubbed off on me..so I am more atune to situations..yes before I had anxiety depression years ago from it but not anymore she knows not to f with me and I can be perfectly fine eith or without her and I don't walk on eggshells at all I sleep at night.
 

Lvdegen

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Isn't amazing how all these dudes that are so "hot with 6 packs" and can have all these "women" seem to always be the ones pretending like they "won" with these type of chicks and then trying to figure out if they will come back? If you have so many women then why would you care?

It's so easy to tell when people are full of it since they post stuff that makes zero sense if that is truly what was happening.
I have multiple women at points I talk to 6...the npd is a dime and the bpd is a good 8.5..the others are like 7 at most so why not learn and fight thru things to manage the better looking ones...i get what I want and will do what it takes...im wondering because I have never been sexually involved and dated a bpd/npd...they always leave the unsureness it's human nature but as of right now I had a girl sleep over and she's in her house right now getting clothes to spend the next 3 days with me so I'm not some chump who sits at home eith no back up
 

xstang77

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Isn't amazing how all these dudes that are so "hot with 6 packs" and can have all these "women" seem to always be the ones pretending like they "won" with these type of chicks and then trying to figure out if they will come back? If you have so many women then why would you care?

It's so easy to tell when people are full of it since they post stuff that makes zero sense if that is truly what was happening.
I don't think he'll still feel like he's winning and unaffected through standing his ground when he's wearing handcuffs because she couldn't get her way about something.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Isn't amazing how all these dudes that are so "hot with 6 packs" and can have all these "women" seem to always be the ones pretending like they "won" with these type of chicks and then trying to figure out if they will come back? If you have so many women then why would you care?

It's so easy to tell when people are full of it since they post stuff that makes zero sense if that is truly what was happening.
Well just cuz I got 10 cars doesn't mean I don't like one more than the other. One car could be a Ferrari and another could be a jalopy; it's all dependent on what/who you value more.
 

Infern0

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To answer the question of will you hear from her again. In the case of bpd/npd the answer is 99.9999% yes. But the timeframe for that is a lot more ambiguous. Could be days could be years.

But this whole situation sounds like a complete mess, you dont have a grip on the situation whatsoever so here comes my advice

Use this undefinable amount of time before she runs low on supply and attempts to draft you back in, to work on fixing yourself up and getting to the stage of being a person who doesnt want to play games with a dangrous mentally ill person.

Wouldnt that be a nice place to be
 

Lvdegen

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To answer the question of will you hear from her again. In the case of bpd/npd the answer is 99.9999% yes. But the timeframe for that is a lot more ambiguous. Could be days could be years.

But this whole situation sounds like a complete mess, you dont have a grip on the situation whatsoever so here comes my advice

Use this undefinable amount of time before she runs low on supply and attempts to draft you back in, to work on fixing yourself up and getting to the stage of being a person who doesnt want to play games with a dangrous mentally ill person.

Wouldnt that be a nice place to be
Sounds like pretty sound advice...thanks
 
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