5 Ways Exclusive Relationships Are Better Than Spinning Plates

[Roober]

For you to notice these things about each other, you wouldn't have time for anyone else. So it IS only possible with one woman. Unless of course you won the Powerball and are financially set for life to where you dont have to worry about working or anything and can just do whatever the hell you want. But most people aren't that fortunate.

If a man was strong enough and of high value enough, a woman would never want to divorce him. How does one do this? By improving upon the subtle flaws.

No we aren't. If we are talking about logic, then there would be no need to ever have sex with a woman in the first place.

Then it's the one thing Disney got right.

The weight of each benefit is subjective to each person. How useful these benefits are will depend on the person and how much they value each of them.

And who's to say you don't keep leverage in exclusive relationships if you know what you are doing? You can still have women ready to jump at you as soon as you give the call while still being exclusive. You can still go hang out with your friends if you want to. You can still go out drinking if you want to. She can't stop you other than by threatening to leave. Which, like I've said, if you play your cards right, shouldn't be an issue.

It's clear you are young enough not to understand the dynamics of LTRs.

Women wouldn't want a divorce? try again! Hypergamy is real and even the best men have been subjected to it.

leverage in relationships? highly doubtful. You will be able to do some things, but not have the free reign of being single. I know one man that gets away with anything he wants with his girl. He was smart enough to knock her up, but he cheats on her left and right, and she basically tolerates all of his shenanigans. I do not know of any other LTRs where the man is in control of his life. It often starts that way, but slowly drifts away from it...

Your trying to argue a moot point. It would be like trying to convince a Hindi to switch to Catholicism. To different trains of thought, and you have to accept that.

 

[Serenity]

Is it really that bad?

So, you rationalize when you don't do something that you really wanted to do?

For example, you want to go out on the piss with friends on a Friday, but you know she'll kick up a fuss.

So the reasoning becomes: "I won't go, and that's my choice". As if it's you really making that decision.

Now even at my most placating, I don't tell myself that it's anything other than a placation. I know, and own, when I'm doing things just to shut a woman up.

You said earlier that you don't lose yourself to the relationship, but this now sounds like the exact opposite.

Yes I have absolutely zero power in my relationship, she makes ALL the decisions and I should not dare to disagree. I'm a pvssywhipped doormat, I let her walk all over me and do whatever the fvck she wants to me.

Ok, seriously. I'm the one in control of this relationship, but I don't plan on abusing my power. I don't want to hurt her because she has done nothing to DESERVE it. It's the opposite, she does a lot to deserve my attention and sometimes I'd rather be with her than go out getting fvcked up in a bar.

But, I have already traveled without her. I have already gone out and gotten drunk without her, I'm doing that tomorrow and I would have gone even of she complained. But she doesn't complain, because I haven't deserved b!tching. I have also bought expensive stuff solely on my own judgement, had no issues with it.

Most importantly I feel satisfied in this relationship. Had I not been satisfied I would end it, I have the power to do that but not the reason.

 

[Mr. Kalikoat]

2) Kids

Don't need ONE woman to do this. The commitment benefits the kids but not the man. We are talking about what benefits MEN and only men.

I hope you'll never have kids. I'll feel sorry for them if you do.


And people wonder why so many young men and women these days are so f*cked up, or why the black community is doing so poorly...

 

[TheFixer14]

The only way for a man to have power in an LTR is if he is way more wealthy than her and has an tightly locked prenup. Outside of that there really is no way. I laugh at any guy who thinks that they have the power in their relationships. Even if you have a "good" relationship you will always be a puppy that waits for her to you your treat.

 

[devilkingx2]

the only benefit to an LTR that i can see is if you're a man that just only needs one woman, like a man that only once to have sex once a week

 

[playa99]

This post is good on the provision that said male has a strong enough frame to first find a quality woman and then maintain his frame throughout the relationship.

From personal experience I have seen at least 90% of men tank horribly in relationships. The few who have pulled it off have been the natural alpha males within their social circle.

If you operate with the modus operandi being that relationships don't work, then they surely won't work for you.

Sidenote: I support doing whatever suits you, if your happy spinning plates as I have been in the past, good for you!

 

[Serenity]

You are sort of missing the point.

The thread compares exclusive relationships with non-exclusive relationships.

Clearly lack of compromise is a particular strength of having non-exclusive relations.

I don't intentionally try to hurt women, even when they "DESERVE" it.

I think that's the behaviour of a b1tchy man.

I just behave according to my own frame and nature. If they get hurt, that isn't my responsibility.

I certainly don't rationalize my compromises. I think that's toxic for your mental health.

Did you tell her that you shagged that prostitute?

I'm not really bothered for your "feelings", mate.

Has nothing to do with a real world cost/benefit analysis.

Feeling satisfied is the benefit, it comes at a cost with or without being in a relationship. Life makes no sense without feelings, motivations wouldn't exist without feelings and there wouldn't be any cost or benefit without feelings defining what is a loss and what is a win. So to say feelings doesn't matter is absurd.

I did not tell her, I will not do that either. What's your point?

I don't rationalize my compromises to hide the fact that they're compromises, I'm well aware there's a few compromises but the benefit outweigh the cost. I chose this knowing what it cost me and what I gained from it. I've been here a few years and while I don't agree with everyone I'm no idiot on these matters anymore.

I wasn't talking against being single and fvcking around, I was just saying that it is not impossible to have a good relationship. If being in a relationship doesn't satisfy you I would advise you not to be in one. It does satisfy me and no matter how hard you try to convince me your way is better I will disagree, I have tried that path before and didn't like it.

I too behave according to my own frame and nature, my frame is just different from yours.

 

[Von]

Okay, here's the alpha answer to this thread: YOU DON'T HAVE TO CHASE/GAME/HIT/RUN after girls... its save you alot of time.... since you are in a relationship and she's right there ....

The contrast: A girlfriend is full time job.... but if she's good for you... she'll save you time more than plate spinning.

The only 2 advantage of plate spinning: emotional freedom and diversity

The advantages of LTR: emotional adrenaline, easy lay, bonding-sharing (and the 5 wyas that was posted above)

I don't think this thread needed 6 pages... to explain to pic what suit your boat (plate spinning or LTR) and to always be DJ about it

 

[Serenity]

@deesade If feelings do not matter there's little to discuss here.

You don't have to switch woman as often as you change your underwear to have balls. I certainly don't think it shows balls to betray what I want because you think negatively of it.

About the prostitute, I didn't rationalize not fvcking her, I rationalized wanting to fvck her. A rationalization is an excuse to do something I didn't really want to do, I fvcked her but I didn't really want to do it. Along with all the other dumb sh!t I didn't really want to do, but that I did anyway because my brain was fvcked up by alcohol. I'll repeat that I didn't enjoy it, I regret it and the thought of doing it again disgusts me.

 

[zekko]

About the prostitute, I didn't rationalize not fvcking her, I rationalized wanting to fvck her. A rationalization is an excuse to do something I didn't really want to do, I fvcked her but I didn't really want to do it. Along with all the other dumb sh!t I didn't really want to do, but that I did anyway because my brain was fvcked up by alcohol. I'll repeat that I didn't enjoy it, I regret it and the thought of doing it again disgusts me.

Good for you for learning from your mstakes, Grewd. That's what the indiscretions of youth are for.

 

[Serenity]

I'm genuinely speechless at your lack of self-awareness

Eh. Good luck to you, sir.

Speechless is my goal. You don't even know what the fvck I'm talking about.

Thanks for the good luck, I wish you the same.

 

[Serenity]

Of course I know what the fvck you are talking about. It's mediocre.

I don't know how to address someone who is that deep in the sh*t.

Have fun, regardless.

You'll learn something, and grow. That's whether you like it or not.

I don't see the "sh!t" you're talking about... It might be mediocre to you, but it isn't to me. You aren't providing any good counter arguments, so I'll assume you don't have any.

I accept the fact that you're different from me. I know it makes you speechless. Have you reflected on what that might mean?

You doubt my humility, but I am not the person you think I am. I know about learning and growing, I know that I won't like everything I learn.

What are you even trying to teach me?

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Why does everyone type every sentence or 2 in it's own paragraph? It fvcks with my reading.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Some of the posts on here are border-line sociopath.

a person with a psychopathic personality whose behavior is antisocial, often criminal, and who lacks a sense of moral responsibility or social conscience.

 

[devilkingx2]

Why does everyone type every sentence or 2 in it's own paragraph? It fvcks with my reading.

kinda feels like you're typing an essay if you don't

Some of the posts on here are border-line sociopath.

whatever gets the girls fam

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

kinda feels like you're typing an essay if you don't

whatever gets the girls fam

Sure, but what is this other then pedestalizing women... making them the most important thing?

If other things were more important than women, then we would moderate the lengths we would go to attaining them. Men are simply over-valuing women here.

 

[devilkingx2]

Sure, but what is this other then pedestalizing women... making them the most important thing?

If other things were more important than women, then we would moderate the lengths we would go to attaining them. Men are simply over-valuing women here.

doing what it takes isn't really pedestalizing, you gotta decide if you want women or not.

for example i dislike exercise and would much rather sit on my couch all day, but women don't like fat guys, so it comes down to whether or not i enjoy lazing around on the couch more than sex. (the debate rages on)

it's not pedestalizing until you place something legitimately objectively important below women, changing your tactics/personality isn't pedestalizing unless you let yourself become a lying scoundrel or a conman or a criminal or something to impress girls

 

[Serenity]

This is all from a boy that says "If I can't use my feelings in a logical discussion, then I'm taking my ball and going home". And "when I slept with a prostitute, it wasn't my fault. It was the drink".

Get out of here with your nonsense

I'm going to only talk seriously to men.

I've made enough "counter arguments" for anyone with a decent brain to see.

You want to think otherwise, I'm happy to just accept that. Your rationalizations are thoroughly evident to anyone with sense.

I don't give a fvck how many people disagree with me. What I'm doing is evidently working for me.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

doing what it takes isn't really pedestalizing, you gotta decide if you want women or not.

for example i dislike exercise and would much rather sit on my couch all day, but women don't like fat guys, so it comes down to whether or not i enjoy lazing around on the couch more than sex. (the debate rages on)

it's not pedestalizing until you place something legitimately objectively important below women, changing your tactics/personality isn't pedestalizing unless you let yourself become a lying scoundrel or a conman or a criminal or something to impress girls

Any man worth his salt should be spinning/ juggling other values besides the value he puts on women.

Now those other values will have something to say about the value he places on women; they will trans-valuate that value, or moderate it.

And here is a man who will go, or is enabled to go, or is enabled by restraining himself enough to go, for quality.

 

[bigneil]

Any man worth his salt should be spinning/ juggling other values besides the value he puts on women.

Now those other values will have something to say about the value he places on women; they will trans-valuate that value, or moderate it.

And here is a man who will go, or is enabled to go, or is enabled by restraining himself enough to go, for quality.

A man wants three things:

1) Quality
2) Fertility
3) Loyalty

#3 is tough to come by when you have girls with both #1 and #2. But remember: if women were more faithful, they'd be faithful to the last guy and you'd have no chance, so it swings both ways. You ultimately need to be better than the other guys.