Female Trump Cards: Sex and Rejection

[Poon King]

Most men having "relationship issues" are living in fear. This goes for both single men and taken men.

What do they fear? They fear the two female trump cards:
1. Loss of Sex
2. Rejection

Women hang these trump cards over a man's head from the first day she meets him all the way to the day she divorces him. These trump cards never go away because MEN give them too much power.

Most men are afraid of the women they interact with. How many men have the balls to actually give women "rules" to follow?

Mindset is so important. Spinning plates is a great tool, but with the wrong mindset it gets you know where (see any post from Tenacity as evidence). To have the power and KEEP the power in relationships you must neutralize women's trump cards. HOW? It all comes down to how you view their trump cards.

The typical male viewpoint:
Loss of Sex = Man feels rejected, marginalized and emasculated
Rejection = The man "f*cked up" and lost something valuable

The views above are 100% blue pill brainwashing. Totally WEAK and wrong way to view those situations.

Here is the correct viewpoint:

Loss of sex = Great, now I can f*ck someone else!
Rejection = I guess we are not on the same page! Good to know. Now I can remove the pedestal AND the attention with it!

Why is it that men have such a hard time LEAVING a woman once he commits? It all comes down to pedestalization of that woman and fear of being single. You should not have a problem leaving a woman at any time for any reason. She isn't acting the way you want? Tell her to change. She won't change? LEAVE. She will usually chase you. Also, you should not care if you are in a relationship or not. This is the very important. YOU MUST NOT CARE IF YOU ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP OR NOT.

All white knights.. cover your eyes: Treating women like dirt works. I flake. I disappear for a week. I ignore text messages. I tell them to "shut up" when they cry. I kick them out of my apartment. This is not done with abusive intent. I do these things when a woman shows defiance and attempts to control/manipulate things. I can do this because I don't FEAR losing them anyway. In fact, I might just dump them first if they get too annoying. Showing NO FEAR boosts a woman's interest level. But I lose respect for them the more I get away with. This is a good thing.

And MEN.. you really don't want to be with a woman you respect. It just turns you into a pedestalizing white knight.

This is the behavior women use to keep weak men in constant fear. You can use it to keep hot, sexy, but insecure women in constant fear. Someone must lead, and if you don't lead, she will control you with her trump cards.

 

[Mr. Kalikoat]

What you say Poon is all obectively true, no arguing about that. But I'd like to say that this mindset doesn't come naturally to men. The reason why "beta males" exist and are the majority isn't because of some feminist conspiracy or social programming, but because it's an innate part of our biology.

It's only natural for men to care about women and eventually fall in love with them and when that happens, everything you say will fall on deaf ears.

I've noticed myself recently that my red pill knowledge is often in conflict with my deepest feelings and desires. I KNOW treating women like dirt works, I KNOW flaking works and I KNOW putting your foot down when a woman acts out of line works, but it is HARD, damn near impossible, to do these things when you actually care deeply about the woman you're with.

When a woman I love slips up I don't want to NEXT her, I want to forgive her, be with her and tell her everything will be alright. I know I should NEXT her, I know there are plenty of other fish in the sea, but doing so is HARD, it HURTS. And it makes me put all my red pill knowledge to question. Because how can "the right thing to do" hurt so much?

I know because of this fact a lot of DJs opt out of love and meaningful relationships altogether, and if that makes them happy, more power to them. But I need love and relationships in my life. I eventually want to find a wife and have children with her. I don't want to die alone and miserable.

I think you have to be some kind of jaded motherf*cker or sociopath if this "alpha" behavior comes naturally to you.

Again, I'm not saying you're wrong Poon, I'm just saying that it's much easier said than done.

I feel that not enough DJs focus on this aspect. We all seem to know HOW to deal with women, but nobody so far managed to explain to me how to deal with MYSELF and my emotions. I feel this is the case because most men, especially DJs, don't dare to talk about their deepest emotions because they think it makes them look like weak "beta males". But that is just dumb. I don't care how much of an "alpha" you are, unless you're a sociopath, you'll have emotions just like the rest of us and I think if we really want to help each other we should be willing to open up about our emotions and discuss them.

That's just my 2 cents.

 

[Who Dares Win]

The problems comes from our upbringing, social conditioning and clear lack of options which leads to a scarsity mentality.

None of this things happen to russia where women outnumber men and hot women outnumber hot men.

Let WWIII happen, let half of western men to die at the front and it will become automatic for all the things you talk about to happen.

Just walk in the streets of your city unless you live in eastern europe and count hot girls then count worthy guys and make the ratio, do that even before counting the M to F ratio in the 18-35 age span.

 

[Roober]

Great stuff!

Was reading "The Rational Male" last night and it basically talked about this. THE FEAR OF BEING SINGLE! plagues every man. When I was married, I felt bad for single people. Now I feel bad for people in LTR/married because their are only a couple good ones I have witnessed, everyone else is just on cruise control. How many of you have heard, "oh, we don't need to talk to each other" as they sit at dinner, or in bed, or otherwise because "we are comfortable as a couple".

Thinking back to my exgf, when she started getting distant, I should have laid the law. I SHOULD have been a man. I SHOULD have told her if you don't make time to see me, I think it's best if we go our separate ways. Why didn't I? Because I was afraid of being single... ONEitis is it's most obvious manifestation...

Poon's points are on point, even though his methods are a bit more... coarse(?). We should not be tolerating $hitty behavior from these women. We have to MAN UP and quit following the female imperative to demsculiniate us, spin plates, and use their pvssys to control us.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Dude your right. The hotter she is the more of these behaviors she needs.

 

[wifehunter]

The cards we hold, trump all!

No sex? Walk away!

Rejection? Walk away! (Which translates to: Rejecting the Rejectors)

We hold the most power in the relationship.

And that knowledge, is carefully hidden by the masses.

Women need us more than we need them. So, why do most guys allow themselves to be jerked around? Foolishness!

 

[bigneil]

I always play hard ball. If they are late I say "Ok, we can do this another time". If they don't reply within 24 hours to date invitations I say "Ok, nevermind". Then I make them convince me otherwise. You must always be on the verge of walking. Always have one foot out the door. Never say anything spiteful. Never complain. If you don't like what is offered, walk away politely.

Today when I realized my favorite stripper didn't reply, I contacted my second favorite stripper and I'm taking her to the first girl's club in 3 hours...

 

[Poon King]

What you say Poon is all obectively true, no arguing about that. But I'd like to say that this mindset doesn't come naturally to men. The reason why "beta males" exist and are the majority isn't because of some feminist conspiracy or social programming, but because it's an innate part of our biology.

It's only natural for men to care about women and eventually fall in love with them and when that happens, everything you say will fall on deaf ears.

I've noticed myself recently that my red pill knowledge is often in conflict with my deepest feelings and desires. I KNOW treating women like dirt works, I KNOW flaking works and I KNOW putting your foot down when a woman acts out of line works, but it is HARD, damn near impossible, to do these things when you actually care deeply about the woman you're with.

The trick is to care more deeply about YOURSELF.

You can love a woman and care about her without allowing her to abuse her power or take advantage. Also, you need to get into the habit of understanding women are fully aware of their actions. In order to give her the benefit of the doubt.. you call her out the first time she f*cks up as a friendly way to say: "Hey, don't do this. Its wrong". When she continues the bad behavior, that's when you get nasty and/or NEXT her.

When a woman I love slips up I don't want to NEXT her, I want to forgive her, be with her and tell her everything will be alright. I know I should NEXT her, I know there are plenty of other fish in the sea, but doing so is HARD, it HURTS. And it makes me put all my red pill knowledge to question. Because how can "the right thing to do" hurt so much?

I know because of this fact a lot of DJs opt out of love and meaningful relationships altogether, and if that makes them happy, more power to them. But I need love and relationships in my life. I eventually want to find a wife and have children with her. I don't want to die alone and miserable.

I think you have to be some kind of jaded motherf*cker or sociopath if this "alpha" behavior comes naturally to you.

Again, I'm not saying you're wrong Poon, I'm just saying that it's much easier said than done.

Society has manipulated you into thinking any kind of treatment of woman that isn't "ass kissing" must make you a sociopath or jaded motherf*cker. Only in relationships with women does "learning from you mistakes" equal "jaded". You are expected to eat sh!t and smile about it. When you don't, you're "jaded". Funny how that works.

Society has manipulated you into thinking you will be miserable without a wife and kids. Dying alone? Please. What if your wife dies first? What if your kids move to another country? Don't be ridiculous.

You are free to get married and have kids if you want. But knowing where you stand and what you are getting yourself into is important regardless of the path you choose.

I feel that not enough DJs focus on this aspect. We all seem to know HOW to deal with women, but nobody so far managed to explain to me how to deal with MYSELF and my emotions. I feel this is the case because most men, especially DJs, don't dare to talk about their deepest emotions because they think it makes them look like weak "beta males". But that is just dumb. I don't care how much of an "alpha" you are, unless you're a sociopath, you'll have emotions just like the rest of us and I think if we really want to help each other we should be willing to open up about our emotions and discuss them.

That's just my 2 cents.

Oh.. I have emotions all the time. But its all about context.

One thing I noticed as I got older and wiser is I would look at situations differently and thus have a different emotional reaction to them. I explain this in the OP where I point out how to look at rejection from a woman.

How you react emotionally depends on how you view the situation. This is why two different men can be in the same situation and one man will laugh while the other sh!ts his pants. Its all about perspective. Best to have the perspective that gives you the most power right?

 

[Poon King]

Because you want to be loved for who you are, not what you do. Which is fine. Maybe naive, but not necessarily a bad thing. No need to change yourself into something amoral just because its effective. Then again I believe in an objective right and wrong.

Every man must decide if he cares more about achieving his goals or being a "good man" in the eyes of society. Sometimes you can't do both.

I always try to do both when possible because that creates a "win win" situation. But when doing both is not possible.. I just do whatever works to achieve my goal.

 

[Trump]

All white knights.. cover your eyes: Treating women like dirt works. I flake. I disappear for a week. I ignore text messages. I tell them to "shut up" when they cry. I kick them out of my apartment. This is not done with abusive intent. I do these things when a woman shows defiance and attempts to control/manipulate things. I can do this because I don't FEAR losing them anyway. In fact, I might just dump them first if they get too annoying. Showing NO FEAR boosts a woman's interest level. But I lose respect for them the more I get away with. This is a good thing.

And MEN.. you really don't want to be with a woman you respect. It just turns you into a pedestalizing white knight.

This is the behavior women use to keep weak men in constant fear. You can use it to keep hot, sexy, but insecure women in constant fear. Someone must lead, and if you don't lead, she will control you with her trump cards.

Poon, right as always. Personally I think when men get older they value companionship and having the women bring something of value to the table more than sex. Any guy with some money and a little bit of game should be able to get sex from a single women very quickly. The stuff of "value" from a woman is alot trickier.

I would just be careful with treating women like dirt. They could easily make up stories to the police and get you in trouble a la Amber Heard and Angelina Jolie. And you know how much this nation loves to protect women's privileges and rights.

 

[Poon King]

Poon, right as always. Personally I think when men get older they value companionship and having the women bring something of value to the table more than sex. Any guy with some money and a little bit of game should be able to get sex from a single women very quickly. The stuff of "value" from a woman is alot trickier.

I would just be careful with treating women like dirt. They could easily make up stories to the police and get you in trouble a la Amber Heard and Angelina Jolie. And you know how much this nation loves to protect women's privileges and rights.

As I said in the OP: I only treat women like dirt when they bring it on themselves.

Lets be honest.. they ask for it. When a man is super "nice" and accommodating to a woman (especially a hot one) she stops respecting him and believes she can walk all over him. Sometimes you have to put them in their place and show them they aren't running sh!t. Either that or you ghost them forever. Some women aren't worth the energy in the end. Its a judgement call.

Regarding companionship... I would say if you can't have it on your own terms then what good is it? If you have to roll over and get walked on to keep it.. what good is it?

The FEAR is strongly ingrained in most men here. And this is where women get their advantage. Remember that women have much more to fear as they age than men do. MUCH more.

 

[wifehunter]

Every man must decide if he cares more about achieving his goals or being a "good man" in the eyes of society. Sometimes you can't do both.

I always try to do both when possible because that creates a "win win" situation. But when doing both is not possible.. I just do whatever works to achieve my goal.

A man can only serve one master.

Society is broken. Anything that society says is "good"...is questionable. The only thing I will do now, is be friendly and polite. Society has lost any objective goodness, thousands of years ago. There is no hope, we've abandoned sound thinking and judgement. We've become a society of fools. It only gets worse from here. We've lost Love, in the most true sense of the word.

The good part is, I know this, and can apply that knowledge to most decisions. Coping, is the challenge. Knowing when to steer clear, is invaluable. It's priceless!

If I'm starting to sound like Captain Nemo, there's a reason.

 

[Dingo]

Great Thread OP...

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

And MEN.. you really don't want to be with a woman you respect. It just turns you into a pedestalizing white knight.

I disagree with this bit. There must be a reason for you to respect a woman, some trait or characteristic that distinguishes her from others. Whether you become a babbling cuck or not is dependent on whether he respects himself more than this woman. It depends on your strength as a man. If you respect yourself more than you respect this woman (or anyone for that matter), then you should not have any problem with pedestalizing her.

 

[Poon King]

I disagree with this bit. There must be a reason for you to respect a woman,

Why is that?

The rest of what you said is true. But WHY do you say their "must" be a reason to respect a woman?

 

[BeTheChange]

Why is that?

The rest of what you said is true. But WHY do you say their "must" be a reason to respect a woman?

I think what he meant was there must be a reason to respect a woman you "want to be with" for anything other than sex and entertainment, assuming they exhibit qualities worth respecting. Not women in general.

 

[Glassguy]

A wise man once told me that unless a woman is a vegetarian or lesbian, they like meat. If she is not getting meat at your place, she is getting it somewhere else or at least looking for it.

A woman will only withhold sex if you allow them to. Your trump card is walking away and meaning it.

Lets be honest, if she is withholding sex, something has happened for her to devalue you and not respect you. She still values and respects someone, just not you. I am not sure that can be recovered.

3rd world employers pay their workers a dollar a day for their sweat shop work and in turn make huge profits from it. I bet if there was a McDonalds down the road paying $10 an hour, the workers would leave and the employer would fail. They dont have options, so it works for the employer. Unfortunately the sweat shop employees are stuck with no options.

You have options. If it doesnt work, explore them. The minute that you think you are "stuck" you have failed. You have lost frame and devalued yourself to nothing, and that is exactly what you will get from the deal. Dont devalue yourself, instead value yourself enough to understand those options and take advantage of them.

 

[Mr. Kalikoat]

The trick is to care more deeply about YOURSELF.

I know and I do. But that's the entire problem. When I feel like I should ghost on a girl, I'm not necessarily worried about hurting her, I'm more worried about hurting MYSELF. When you love a girl and care for a girl, ghosting hurts, it's hard, it's easier said than done and it makes me wonder "do I really have to do this? Is this really the right way?" Usually after a while I'll almost always discover that yes, it is indeed the right way and it really had to be done, but in the moment when I'm about to make that decision, it's hard to see the bigger picture and it's hard to accept that ghosting is the right thing to do.

Is there any way to make these kind of decisions hurt less? Or is it always going to be painful?

Society has manipulated you into thinking any kind of treatment of woman that isn't "ass kissing" must make you a sociopath or jaded motherf*cker. Only in relationships with women does "learning from you mistakes" equal "jaded". You are expected to eat sh!t and smile about it. When you don't, you're "jaded". Funny how that works.

Society has manipulated you into thinking you will be miserable without a wife and kids. Dying alone? Please. What if your wife dies first? What if your kids move to another country? Don't be ridiculous.

You are free to get married and have kids if you want. But knowing where you stand and what you are getting yourself into is important regardless of the path you choose.

I don't buy it. This to me rings hollow. It sounds no different than the feminists claiming that "gender is a social construct" and that the patriarchal society has manipulated us into the traditional gender roles. It's bullsh*t. I don't care about what society at large thinks about me, I barely even care what my colleagues or acquaintances think.

Blaming society is a cop-out.

Biology clearly plays a huge part. Love and procreation is not a social construct, it's a biological phenomenon, a chemical reaction in our brain that drives us to seek a partner to procreate with.

Society isn't telling me I'll be miserable without a wife and kids, I'm telling myself that. Because I don't want to die alone without a wife and/or kids at my side. That very thought just scares the crap out of me to be quite honest.

As usual, the truth is probably somewhere in between. Maybe some of the dumb sh*t we do or feel is the result of social programming, while the other half of it is driven by our biological instincts.

But I digress.

Oh.. I have emotions all the time. But its all about context.

One thing I noticed as I got older and wiser is I would look at situations differently and thus have a different emotional reaction to them. I explain this in the OP where I point out how to look at rejection from a woman.

How you react emotionally depends on how you view the situation. This is why two different men can be in the same situation and one man will laugh while the other sh!ts his pants. Its all about perspective. Best to have the perspective that gives you the most power right?

You're right about that. I can't deny that there is logic and truth in this. It's just easier said than done. I dunno, maybe I'm just thinking this way because I'm going through a rough patch in life. I often feel my emotions are in control of me instead of me being in control of my emotions and I right now I just don't know how to flip that around.

 

[C00lAF]

I tell them to "shut up" when they cry. I

Ok put yourself in my shoes for a moment,my main plate bestie died,her father diagnosed with cancer and her uncle got chems splashing all over his face burning his lips(all in the same day),and she calls me....tell her to shut up? Nah bro thats too much

 

[Poon King]

I know and I do. But that's the entire problem. When I feel like I should ghost on a girl, I'm not necessarily worried about hurting her, I'm more worried about hurting MYSELF. When you love a girl and care for a girl, ghosting hurts, it's hard, it's easier said than done and it makes me wonder "do I really have to do this? Is this really the right way?" Usually after a while I'll almost always discover that yes, it is indeed the right way and it really had to be done, but in the moment when I'm about to make that decision, it's hard to see the bigger picture and it's hard to accept that ghosting is the right thing to do.

Is there any way to make these kind of decisions hurt less? Or is it always going to be painful?

Pure co-dependence.

I don't see how you are hurting yourself by ghosting a woman who is not on the same page as you, doesn't respect you and never will. Sounds dumb to me.

I don't buy it. This to me rings hollow. It sounds no different than the feminists claiming that "gender is a social construct" and that the patriarchal society has manipulated us into the traditional gender roles. It's bullsh*t. I don't care about what society at large thinks about me, I barely even care what my colleagues or acquaintances think.

Blaming society is a cop-out.

Biology clearly plays a huge part. Love and procreation is not a social construct, it's a biological phenomenon, a chemical reaction in our brain that drives us to seek a partner to procreate with.

Society isn't telling me I'll be miserable without a wife and kids, I'm telling myself that. Because I don't want to die alone without a wife and/or kids at my side. That very thought just scares the crap out of me to be quite honest.

As usual, the truth is probably somewhere in between. Maybe some of the dumb sh*t we do or feel is the result of social programming, while the other half of it is driven by our biological instincts.

But I digress.

If you'll be miserable without a wife and kids then you will be miserable with them too. Usually men who make marriage and kids the "be all end all" of life have low self-esteem and no significant life goals. There is a whole world out there to experience outside of the "family bubble".

What will you do if your wife dies and your kids move to a foreign country? Kill yourself?

You sound like you will be one of those horrible blood sucking parents who cling to their adult children and try to control their lives because you have no life of your own.