Did I Mess Up?

chris2for

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So I met this girl two months ago and everything was going well. She's so beautiful, smart, and funny.

Well I'm not sure if I screwed up or not.

I was with her the other night and got pretty drunk. I saw that another guy was calling her and made a joke at first about her having a 'roster and said "oh I see your 'number 1' is calling", "f"ck him. I say that I have a number one as well but then retract it and said that I was just kidding because I dont have a number 1. I tell her that she's number 1 and only 1. Then I asked her if I'm really not her number. So she turns her head away from and that's when he said "seriously? am I not?".She started laughing and said you are but then I said that i thought she was lying (because she was laughing). She said that she wouldn't lie to me. After that I said that I'm going to call her my baby because she's my baby. Also, that whatever she's doing for her birthday (it's coming up) that I want to be there.

After that we were kissing and I stop and pulls us apart and said, "can we just stop playing games it's just you and me okay?" and she said ok. She then asked if I'm usually this touchy feely and I said no, only when I really like someone and I like you a lot. I don't really remember her saying it back.

1. Did I screw up?
2. Did she seem not that into what I was saying to her?
3. How would you handle this?
 

LiveYourDream

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If you continue to act that desperate and needy for validation she'll move on fast. Knock off the alcohol, pull yourself together or both, if you need to. Get a hold of yourself, quick. Women want to be with a Man. You weren't behaving like one.
 

cola

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So I met this girl two months ago and everything was going well. She's so beautiful, smart, and funny.

Well I'm not sure if I screwed up or not.

I was with her the other night and got pretty drunk. I saw that another guy was calling her and made a joke at first about her having a 'roster and said "oh I see your 'number 1' is calling", "f"ck him. I say that I have a number one as well but then retract it and said that I was just kidding because I dont have a number 1. I tell her that she's number 1 and only 1. Then I asked her if I'm really not her number. So she turns her head away from and that's when he said "seriously? am I not?".She started laughing and said you are but then I said that i thought she was lying (because she was laughing). She said that she wouldn't lie to me. After that I said that I'm going to call her my baby because she's my baby. Also, that whatever she's doing for her birthday (it's coming up) that I want to be there.

After that we were kissing and I stop and pulls us apart and said, "can we just stop playing games it's just you and me okay?" and she said ok. She then asked if I'm usually this touchy feely and I said no, only when I really like someone and I like you a lot. I don't really remember her saying it back.

1. Did I screw up?
2. Did she seem not that into what I was saying to her?
3. How would you handle this?
Ok here is your corrective action plan.

  1. No more drinking around girls. You say stupid sh*t when you're drunk.
  2. Never show a girl another guy is a thought on your mind. You shouldnt even have acknowledged him.
  3. You talk too much in general, nothing you were doing had anything to do with getting her to want to screw you.
  4. Kill the neediness. @LiveYourDream
You are going to not call her for a few days, then invite her out. You arent going to drink while out and you are going to tone your whole vibe down a bit.
You are also going to go for the lay that night.
All this is assuming you didnt run her away.
 

DiegoSantori

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Imagine a James Bond scene in which James Bond is telling the woman "Oh I see your 'number 1' is calling." and "I'm usually not that touchy-feely, only when I really like someone and I like you a lot."

Would you think less of James Bond if he said that? I definitely would.
 

BrainDamage92

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If she makes you jealous, stay calm and withdraw attention or simply go flirt with another girl at the party. In the end, you fell in love, and no matter how cool you are, if you fell in love she got you by the balls.

And this drunken episode was a big fuk up. Id say you stand no chance with her from now on, shell fuks with you any way she wants. Anyway have you even slept with her yet? Couse then you can do it again, but you lost control m8
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

thatfeel

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Oh man. You basically handed her a sh!t test on a platter and turned in your man card with it. Since you were drunk if this were to come up in the future you could play it off as something dumb, maybe, and that's a big maybe. Unfortunately she knows who you are now and it was pretty heavy validation seeking material you two were needlessly yapping on about. I would definitely try to occupy yourself with at least another girl and agree with the general advice of withdrawing attention and waiting a bit to schedule anything else.
 

chris2for

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Oh man. You basically handed her a sh!t test on a platter and turned in your man card with it. Since you were drunk if this were to come up in the future you could play it off as something dumb, maybe, and that's a big maybe. Unfortunately she knows who you are now and it was pretty heavy validation seeking material you two were needlessly yapping on about. I would definitely try to occupy yourself with at least another girl and agree with the general advice of withdrawing attention and waiting a bit to schedule anything else.
Why is it a big maybe that I can play this off?

You think she thinks I really meant what I said?
 

thatfeel

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I'm saying it's a maybe cause something like that is kind of hard to play off as a "haha oh just kidding" sort of thing. Like when you talk about someone behind their back to someone, and the person you're talking to actually likes that person, and you go "just kidding" hoping they won't tell that person you were talking sh!t, but you weren't really kidding... I wouldn't bring it up at all though.

I would assume she believes what you said, and use it as an opportunity to re-frame a bit, by doing all of what's been suggested here.
 

chris2for

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If she makes you jealous, stay calm and withdraw attention or simply go flirt with another girl at the party. In the end, you fell in love, and no matter how cool you are, if you fell in love she got you by the balls.

And this drunken episode was a big fuk up. Id say you stand no chance with her from now on, shell fuks with you any way she wants. Anyway have you even slept with her yet? Couse then you can do it again, but you lost control m8
Thanks. It really seems like I fell in love though? Yea I have. I said part of this while we were having sex, after, and before.
 

chris2for

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I'm saying it's a maybe cause something like that is kind of hard to play off as a "haha oh just kidding" sort of thing. Like when you talk about someone behind their back to someone, and the person you're talking to actually likes that person, and you go "just kidding" hoping they won't tell that person you were talking sh!t, but you weren't really kidding... I wouldn't bring it up at all though.

I would assume she believes what you said, and use it as an opportunity to re-frame a bit, by doing all of what's been suggested here.
Damn you're right. I guess if you're that emotional when you're trying a lot of what you're saying is true/how you feel.

So even though I do like her I need to pull back and date other girls?
 

thatfeel

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I mean, presumably you weren't in an LTR with her or ever talked about exclusivity?
 

playa99

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Getting sloppy drunk around women can go horribly wrong. I have had several occasions in the past where things have gone dreadfully wrong.

What @cola said is gold. Provided you haven't scared her off being very needy you can still salvage this. No more quotes of 'I really like you' 'I think I'm falling in love with you'. It is the womans job to commit emotionally, both in words but more importantly in her actions. She needs to prove to you she is interested.
 

BrainDamage92

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Thanks. It really seems like I fell in love though? Yea I have. I said part of this while we were having sex, after, and before.
fail, epic fail bro, I am dissapointed, but if you fall in love that means your heart is working which is kinda nice but will bring you pain in the long run

its just infatuation from having sex with a pretty girl thats it

I kinda envy you tho, I cant fall in love anymore
 

Yewki

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So I met this girl two months ago and everything was going well. She's so beautiful, smart, and funny.

Well I'm not sure if I screwed up or not.
The part in bold is where you screwed up, don't need to read the rest

How can she respect you if you pedestalize her?
 

sph21

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She then asked if I'm usually this touchy feely and I said no, only when I really like someone and I like you a lot. I don't really remember her saying it back.
You're too easy to get. Every woman's mission is to find love. By saying that you really like someone, you just let her know that her mission is over. When her mission on you is over, she will make another mission which is to find another love. When you say this kind of stupid thing, her respect for you has dried up along with her attraction for you.

1. Did I screw up?
Yes. Big time.

2. Did she seem not that into what I was saying to her?

You know the answer

3. How would you handle this?
Let it go. She's friendzoned you.


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You cannot control the situation, but you can control yourself, your emotions, and your life.
You cannot have women love you until you love yourself.
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You cannot fully know the principles of this website until you leave it.
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You have a lot to learn. I suggest you to read DJBible. Some golden threads I recommend you to read are:
 

Poon King

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There is no "screwing up" when you're being authentic.

This is why I try so hard to get men to change to a more alpha mindset so that they can become true NATURALS with women rather than actors following PUA "rules".

You definitely displayed beta insecurity and a little bit of supplication with your "just kidding". That remark showed FEAR of her reaction or opinion. As a man you should be the dominant one not the supplicating one. She should be worried about what YOU think.
 

chris2for

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There is no "screwing up" when you're being authentic.

This is why I try so hard to get men to change to a more alpha mindset so that they can become true NATURALS with women rather than actors following PUA "rules".

You definitely displayed beta insecurity and a little bit of supplication with your "just kidding". That remark showed FEAR of her reaction or opinion. As a man you should be the dominant one not the supplicating one. She should be worried about what YOU think.
Yea you're right. I didn't realize it showed fear.

Did she not seem into what I was saying though?
The next day everything seemed fine and when I contacted her the next two days in a row she seemed receptive but can't help but think that if she and I were on he same page she would've brought it up, especially the next day. Since she never really brought it up was that her avoiding it?
 

Poon King

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Yea you're right. I didn't realize it showed fear.

Did she not seem into what I was saying though?
The next day everything seemed fine and when I contacted her the next two days in a row she seemed receptive but can't help but think that if she and I were on he same page she would've brought it up, especially the next day. Since she never really brought it up was that her avoiding it?
Stop analyzing her so much. Its her job to analyze you.

Your only job is to lead and pound her into your mattress.
 

Caravaggio

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You done ****ed up boyo

You invited a **** test and weren't prepared for it

Back peddled like a ***** and now you've lost frame and the game

Gotta burn to learn...
 

chris2for

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You done ****ed up boyo

You invited a **** test and weren't prepared for it

Back peddled like a ***** and now you've lost frame and the game

Gotta burn to learn...
Right, I but I felt like I had to back peddle. Did it seem like I meant all that stuff?
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

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