Post-Lay Soft No-Contact

[Bible_Belt]

I just came home from the best second date I ever had. Sex marathon records may have been set. She is tiny, blonde, and has a beautiful body. She also told me, in bed, "Most men are b!tches. I don't see that in you."

So now, a few hours later, it occurred to me that this is the time that a typical man would fvck things up by being all over her. I'm going to adopt a "the b!tch texts first" rule. If she likes me because I'm not a b!tch, it means I have to make her be the b!tch, and act like I don't notice that I just fvcked her. I'll respond, but I'm not texting her first.

I think a soft NC is very well played right after you have sex with a girl for the first time. That's your golden moment to show that a little bit of pvssy is no big deal in your life. Most men will fvck everything up for themselves by smothering the girl just because they had sex. Now is your chance to demonstrate value by acting like everything that happened was no big deal. A woman is very vulnerable at this point; her feelings about you can go either way. If you act like you won the lottery because she made the mistake of having sex with you, she's not going to want to do you again.

 

[logicallefty]

Nice job. You are exactly right. Most men not only smother her at this point but whatever kind of masculine qualities/frame that attracted her to the bedroom gets broken down and put back in the wood pile... Or thrown out to the curb with the trash.. Because at this point because he figures "Hey she likes me she had sex with me. I don't need to do all this suave stuff anymore or 'play these silly games'.. I can totally let my guard down now, be myself, ask her to me by GF, and tell her how much I care about her and all that".. bla bla bla

 

[AttackFormation]

Nice job. You are exactly right. Most men not only smother her at this point but whatever kind of masculine qualities/frame that attracted her to the bedroom gets broken down and put back in the wood pile... Or thrown out to the curb with the trash.. Because at this point because he figures "Hey she likes me she had sex with me. I don't need to do all this suave stuff anymore or 'play these silly games'.. I can totally let my guard down now, be myself, ask her to me by GF, and tell her how much I care about her and all that".. bla bla bla

Exactly this. These girls want to be your b1tch, but you have to let them. They can't if you fvck up.

 

[Julian]

Im like a alleycat if a chick feeds me puzzyy once Ill be back the next day for more and if she shuts me down Ill just go find my puzzy elsewhere...always prowling for free ***** lol ill be back everyday til she says no hahaha

I dont play games and I dont hide my wants or needs. I guess for me its more animal instinct and not desperation. Just plain logic. Usually chicks are down with it to be honest. And if they feel like im using them...yes..I am. I tell them.

 

[HeadLightsOn]

OP this could be a good post to keep us up to date on. But please be honest - if you act like an AFC - tell us. If she breaks silence first - or doesn't, tell us. Sounds fun.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I was texting with her today. She just got swept off her feet in a new romance with an exciting new millionaire lover who whisked her away for a weekend holiday.

I'm just going to play it cool. I don't have a million bucks, but I do have one thing her new girlfriend doesn't have. Maybe they'll invite me over.

 

[HeadLightsOn]

I was texting with her today. She just got swept off her feet in a new romance with an exciting new millionaire lover who whisked her away for a weekend holiday.

I'm just going to play it cool. I don't have a million bucks, but I do have one thing her new girlfriend doesn't have. Maybe they'll invite me over.

Well this changes things. C0ck vs pu$$y - I'm a gambling man, so I'm going to say $ plus slit = ownership. I'm rooting for you though.

 

[Married Buried]

You bang her good? I guarantee she will be back until the moment you get lazy in the sack.

 

[Bible_Belt]

So it turns out the new woman in her life has a boyfriend, plus the two of them never actually had sex. She tells me that with much regret. I doubt she's lying; she knows I don't care.

We haven't had sex again, but she keeps bringing me food. She's brought me dinner twice. The second time, I made her bring me beer, too. I did at least give her money for the beer.

She keeps trying to push my jealousy buttons, but the funny part is that I don't have any. I think that is what makes me interesting to her.

 

[Bible_Belt]

We just fvcked all day. I posted about it here:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php?threads/lr-sometimes-they-come-easy.231252/#post-2308365

 

[Bible_Belt]

She texted me today, "I'm coming over." She was here a couple hours. She really likes sitting on my lap.

This is like the Seinfeld episode where Jerry meets his female self, and they get engaged, And then they later break up, when he realizes, "I can't marry me; I don't even like me." I don't know if it will come to that, but she and I are tremendously similar people.

Honestly, I'm in love. I must think I'm great, because I am crazy about the woman who is just like me. I occasionally have the urge to be like Forrest Gump and just blurt out to her "I love you JEN-Nay!!!" And I think she feels the same way, but she is me, and each of us are skilled in relationship dynamics. This is like Gary Kasparov playing chess with Bobby Fisher. But here's why I am going to win - as a man, I only have to play her to a draw, and then I will win because I am the man. That's what has been happening thus far. She's beautiful and gets hit on constantly, but she needs a man who is a challenge. Every guy just wants to fall down and kiss her feet. Hell, I sympathize. I understand what those guys are feeling. But I know she likes me because I'm different. She will rock my world in bed one day, and then I'll act like it never happened the next day. I won't text her, or be up her ass like every other guy she has ever met.

And all of this is hard! It doesn't come easy. I feel myself slipping constantly, at least mentally, but I catch it before I act on it. My original post is the theme of this relationship so far...fvck her, then act like it never happened. And yes, the sex is good, but she has told me that the way she experiences attraction is about a lot more than that. Guys have been good in bed before, but chased her away by being too clingy.

In regard to understanding gender dynamics, I think I am a gifted individual. But this time, I've met my match. I just gotta play for the draw...

 

[Bible_Belt]

She just left, was here for hours. Great sex.

Forgive me for going on and on about the same woman. I can't tell her I like her, so I tell you guys. I'll gush like an AFC with oneitis, which I do have, but I'm not going to tell her anything I feel. This is a sickness that can be resolved through group therapy.

I think she's the woman of my dreams, but I'm going to treat her like I can just barely tolerate her in exchange for the sex. I think she feels the same way about me and is doing her best to hide it as well. It's a chess match. I'm crazy about her, but the worst thing I could do is tell her that...which is why I'm telling you guys.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Oh, and by the way, I kinda have a girlfriend, too. That will likely complicate matters at some point.

 

[Bible_Belt]

She has two teenagers and often has to stay home with her kids on weekends. I've kept up the 'respond, but don't initiate' rule.

She just texted me, "Be in my bed at 9 am tomorrow." This is how middle-aged people have booty calls, lol. I just replied "ok." And now, even though I know we're going to fvck tomorrow morning, I am going to act like I don't notice, don't care, and attach so little consequence to those plans that she'll be hoping I don't forget to show up. Right now is yet another example of a time when most guys would blow up the girl's phone with horny texts and act like they just won the PowerBall Lotto of Sex.

Simple rules like this work very well with attractive women. The more attractive a girl is, the more AFC the men of the world are towards her. Most of them just fall down at a girl's feet like a drooling dog. One of my favorite quotes from Rocky is "Women weaken legs." I think it could also be said that good looks weaken game. A little goes a long way when every other guy in her life has none at all.

 

[Glumix]

Like your reports. Why not teasing her a bit after the "be in my bed" text ? You are not that easy to catch, aren't you ? She orders you do ?

 

[Bible_Belt]

She's normally into the dominant woman thing, and has had several relationships like that. But it's all fallen apart with me and become a running joke between us. At the same time, I let her pretend. She needs to feel like she is in control during sex, and I let her. I like it; it's different. She does most of the work.

She's a total sex addict, too. She was sending me naked pics of herself just now; we spent most of yesterday together. At this moment, she is one being very AFC toward me, and that makes everything easy. But I only got to this point because of the idea in the original post.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I've said before on sosuave, all of my posts are really just me talking to myself. When I give someone advice, it is me trying to reinforce the things in my head that I know are correct, but I still need reminding of. I say to guys all the time, 'ignore her words; they don't matter.' I call it The Vaginal Prerogative - the right to say stupid sh!t that I end up ignoring just to fvck the girl.

The day before yesterday, she managed to get under my skin a little by telling me over text message that she was much less serious about me because I didn't have a stable job. Then she said something to imply that she was looking to meet a guy who would welcome her moving in with her two teenagers. I *almost* blew up at her..."B!tch, we met on craigslist casual encounters! And you think that because you're hot, every guy in your life will just volunteer to raise your kids?"

It was really hard, but I took my own advice. Words of a woman are of little consequence. Do not attach importance to them.....even when they hurt your ego. So I acted like I barely noticed what she said, and didn't take offense. I let it go, permanently, other than to post it here.

She came over yesterday, and we had a great time doing nothing and having a lot of sex. For lunch, I took her to my mom's house, and we ate a ham sandwich out of the fridge while no one was home. Today she texted me to announce that she was coming over. She brought me a pizza and a 12-pack, which I never did pay her for, and then a sex marathon ensued. She just now left.

She's not said anything like the text that made me mad ever since. She has no idea I was mad about it. I had to shut up, remind myself that I was I giant hypocrite if I didn't follow the same advice I give on sosuave, and make myself do it. But as it turns out, I gave myself good advice, because it kept me from talking myself out of two days of a lot of good sex.

She really is crazy about me, and I'm flattered, I like her a lot too, but I'm also glad I can see it, and that I've come out ahead so far. It makes it easier to step back in an emotional sense. The rule with girls is to not let her know for certain that you like her. I think it works the same way for us. Now that I know she likes me, it is a lot easier to control my own emotions. This must be how women feel when AFCs make their awkward and obvious advances.

I may be a DJ, but she is a master heart-breaker. I am grateful to have the upper hand so far. As much as guys on here complain about women having things easier, this woman is my equal in every way - looks, brains, probably even game - and I still feel like I have the upper hand, because I am the man. It's a contest of holding back emotions. Come on, guys, we ought to be better at that than women!

 

[CuddleJunkie]

One question BibleBelt, how do dom women see their relationship with their subs? Do they despise them in the deeps of their hearts? It is something I've been think lately.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Yesterday, before she left my house, she said "oh, sh!t! I was supposed to have a date tonight." She had forgotten. I was like "ok! have fun!"

Then she texted me later that she cancelled the date and was staying in. She said he was a great guy in every way, but she just wasn't attracted to him, and she said that would make her abuse him for all the wrong reasons.

She's doesn't do the dominatrix thing with me, so it's hard for me to see her that way. But I think. to answer your question, it can go either way. Maybe the dom woman despises the guy, or maybe she loves him and gives him what he needs. Every relationship is different.

 

[Bible_Belt]

As they say on the Internet, pics or it didn't happen

Look at that ass! It's fvcking incredible.

Thank you to everyone for letting me be a big AFC and tell you everything that I'm never going to tell her.