Can a nasty relationship with a BDP woman damage you permanently

[GeoMan]

its been 6 months since I endured a nasty relationship full of drama cheating and emotional abuse from my ex and I still feel very depressed at times. It's like I can't fully bounce back to the man I was before. I've become very bitter with woman and feel like there all slots. I don't get excited to try and talk to other girls. I know it's something I have to get over or it'll ruin my life. Has anyone had this problem before and fully bounced back?

 

[El Payaso]

They can certainly make one jaded but I chalk it up to experience.

 

[captain55]

yes

 

[HeadLightsOn]

Yes. Have 'fully' bounced back. Unfortunately the time is different for everyone. Id say 6 months is around mid range, but it could be a couple of years before you fully purge the poison.

If you let it effect your attitude to other women youll end up bitter and no use to yourself or a woman.

Give yourself time but also be conscious and aware of making gradual improvements.

 

[Poonani Maker]

No. Nothing, if you are a Man, can damage you "permanently" beyond Physical damage, of course. A Woman can be damaged permanently, but You, as the Man, are supposed to be centered or a mountain of immovable rock. The woman is the weather, the tornadoes, the floods, the winds, the snow, the hot bearing sun that tries to chip away at the mountain, but the mountain is just There, and will always be.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Depends on how strong, tough, and resilient you are. The stronger your personality, the less damage is possible.

 

[GS750]

They can certainly scar you for a year or two.

The experience can also make you wiser, more experienced, more street-wise, and far stronger.

In the end, you decide how it affects you.

Truth. Dealing with a BPD, or any damaged unstable train-wreck of a woman, can fvck you up for a while. But you will learn some things about yourself. You will learn to easily spot a woman that should be avoided. You will learn what you are willing to put up with. You will become an expert at manipulation and how some women use it to try and control you. I don't think you'll be screwed up permanently though. Better off in the long run IMO.

 

[Fitters]

If you learn from this and grow as a man , you WILL be able to get any woman you want. I will say it's been a year and bit since my experience and I'm starting to settle into the new me. Remember , these type of girls are created / promoted by WEAK men. A strong and wise man will know these type of girls are only goof for sex and casual fun , you do not invest or commit to them.
Your experience with this woman is a sign that YOU need to grow as a man & the best growth sterns from pain.

Everything is not going to be okay in a year , you need to change every aspect of your life that makes you unhappy.

 

[dillj]

it depends, upon your income/ability to move, get another (better) woman, how deeply your were "into" her, if kids are involved, if you're healthy, centered, etc. I had one that I allowed to still have a hook into me 20+ years after we'd split. Looking back, I can't believe how much I let her ruin my life.

 

[SamTheHobit]

Nic

No. Nothing, if you are a Man, can damage you "permanently" beyond Physical damage, of course. A Woman can be damaged permanently, but You, as the Man, are supposed to be centered or a mountain of immovable rock. The woman is the weather, the tornadoes, the floods, the winds, the snow, the hot bearing sun that tries to chip away at the mountain, but the mountain is just There, and will always be.

Love the use of metaphors.

 

[Dgwizdal]

Let me ask - how much did you emotionally invest in her? How long were you with her? Did you know what you were getting yourself into or find out here after?

 

[Desdinova]

I think it depends on the woman. I've been able to get over most of my long term investments quite quickly, but there are two women in my history that have taken 3 years to fully get over. You can tell yourself to get over her all you want, but sometimes you just need time for the emotions to fade from the memories.

Memories are like really old film prints. The blues and greens fade like emotions. The reds remain as does the memory.

 

[Suspens]

You have the power to run away from ill people or damaged cumdumpester trashbags.

 

[GeoMan]

Let me ask - how much did you emotionally invest in her? How long were you with her? Did you know what you were getting yourself into or find out here after?

I was completely infatuated with her first girl I took serious as to have LTR with. Most girls I just keep as fwb until the excitement fades. 8 months. And yes as inexperienced as I was my gut feeling was that something was up with her I was just gullible enough to believe she would change for me(lol rooky mistake). She left her bf for for me and he even warned me that she would do the same to me. He was right.

 

[Dgwizdal]

I was completely infatuated with her first girl I took serious as to have LTR with. Most girls I just keep as fwb until the excitement fades. 8 months. And yes as inexperienced as I was my gut feeling was that something was up with her I was just gullible enough to believe she would change for me(lol rooky mistake). She left her bf for for me and he even warned me that she would do the same to me. He was right.

Lol you goofed man. The ONLY way to keep these awful creatures around is to treat em like dirt and never give them validation no matter how much they say they want love - they don't. And the ONLY way to stay sane is to become a narcissist or psychopath to remain emotionally detached and remember who she really is at the end of the day - a ****!n nut job.

I'm sure you've done your research - live and learn dude. It ain't your fault - there's no saving them. And the average (or sane) guy doesn't stand a chance at not getting their heart ripped out.

Rest easy knowing she will live a chaotic empty life with nothing to fill the bottomless void in her soul but d!cks and fiths: on an endless quest to feel alive by doing anything she can to get attention from anyone that will provide it instead of taking responsibility for her own happiness and actions. She knows she is a hopeless worthless unstable unaccountable irrational hyper-emotional ticking time bomb that will eventually end up with you in jail or dead - of course with her rationalizing she's the victim. Be glad you got out now - you know that your 10000x times better than that fvcking retard.

You'll be good dude; Laughing to yourself Sooner than you think...

 

[Dgwizdal]

Ps - once you get your head right after dealing with a BPD - you're senses, game, and ability to remain cool calm and collected in the face of any sh!t the next chick throws your way will 10x what it was prior to.

 

[Greasy Pig]

I don't think my ex was BPD but she was fvcking crazy and did everything possible to erode my self-esteem and completely drained me emotionally.
I walked in May and was in a good place until recently when I had lunch with a mutual friend and he told me my ex had been posting shyt on Facebook with her new man.
I was with her for nearly three years and she mentioned me once on Facebook, refused to put me in her relationship status and "untagged" herself from photos I would post of us together.
So to hear she's being so public with a new guy really fvcking hurt and brought me crashing back to square 1.
But time really is your friend. I wish I had a fast-forward button but each day I'm getting better.
The thing is, you know she's a toxic cvnt, you know you're infinitely better off without her, you know you dodged a bullet, but that doesn't stop the pain. Just keep striding on and one day, you won't feel the pain anymore.

 

[exhausted]

Lol you goofed man. The ONLY way to keep these awful creatures around is to treat em like dirt and never give them validation no matter how much they say they want love - they don't. And the ONLY way to stay sane is to become a narcissist or psychopath to remain emotionally detached and remember who she really is at the end of the day - a ****!n nut job.

I'm sure you've done your research - live and learn dude. It ain't your fault - there's no saving them. And the average (or sane) guy doesn't stand a chance at not getting their heart ripped out.

Rest easy knowing she will live a chaotic empty life with nothing to fill the bottomless void in her soul but d!cks and fiths: on an endless quest to feel alive by doing anything she can to get attention from anyone that will provide it instead of taking responsibility for her own happiness and actions. She knows she is a hopeless worthless unstable unaccountable irrational hyper-emotional ticking time bomb that will eventually end up with you in jail or dead - of course with her rationalizing she's the victim. Be glad you got out now - you know that your 10000x times better than that fvcking retard.

You'll be good dude; Laughing to yourself Sooner than you think...

Yep I know the type, she does something wrong, lies or something disrespectful and when you call her out on it she gets mad at YOU for it....Victim mentality

 

[logicallefty]

BPDs most definitely damage you temporarily at the very least. But in the end you are a much stronger and enlightened man for it. NOW, I wouldn't suggest going out and purposely finding one of these trash bags so you can be enlightened. If you have never been with one, lucky you, you have an easier path to enlightenment: just listen to those of us who have had to learn the hard way! We aren't fudging our stories.... If you still have faith that women/humans can't possibly be this bad, like I did at first, slap yourself on the face and wake the fvck up! In particular, look at the stories shared on here about these toxic rotten carp cvnts that are all so similar. That's one thing women just suck at in general is being different... The type of women we speak of in this thread are all the freaking same, even down to the words they choose and the allegations they make.

 

[SamTheHobit]

The BPD experience is not what jaded those of us that are jaded. It is very easy to write off that experience as an aberration caused by a very severe and somewhat rare mental illness(not THAT rare). After a few years you will not even look back at it as "the one that got away."

It was seeing the same behaviors repeated to a lesser extent over and over and over and over with "normal" "healthy" women that got me all bent out of shape.

I find your posts so relatable it's scary.