Life of an Alpha

When I first started on this site, I was an AFC who thought way too much...but you want to reach that point, where you have no questions or thoughts about girls and "dating."
"Alphas" are good to consider...you see them portrayed in movies...and perhaps there are a few at your school.

When considering Alphas, it comes down to 3 points (at least the only 3 I can think of right now)

1. Thinking is not natural. When we were all little boys, we didn't think that much outside of class. We went to school, found reading and learning fun, had recess and ran around. Went home and enjoyed time with our parents. watched cartoons. did simple ****. AND WE FCKING LOVED IT.

Then we started to get older. We became consumers and targets of media/corporations/businesses. We developed EGOS. EGO=ENEMY

When life was simple when we were young, it was because we were ego-less. We didn't think about materialistic or physical things really...we just wanted to have fun and learn. We didn’t have negatives thoughts of inferiority.

Now, we're in high school, and our egos have been fed and injected with steroids...we think..."we're not strong enough. not big enough. not attractive enough. not smart enough. not funny enough. NOT GOOD ENOUGH" EGO=THINK=ANALYZE...ego leads to thoughts about beliefs regarding stupid things that have no value

Alphas don't think about girls or how to interact with them. They're like little guys who "treat girls like they're little girls." That was a quote from the POOK. When an AFC sees a girl he's interested, he thinks about how he looks and how she looks. Then he thinks about how to approach her and everything regarding that approach. Then he doesn't approach because he was too busy thinking about approaching. Then he goes home analyzing his nonexistent approach. Then he's in bed, analyzing the approach a little more. Then he dreams about how the approach would have went. Then he wakes up hoping to at least see her beautiful face. Then he finally sees her within approaching distance. AND HE DOES THE SAME FCKING **** AGAIN. STOP THINKING. WHEN YOU'RE NOT IN CLASS OR STUDYING, DON'T THINK. JUST FCKING DO IT.

Alphas are ego-less. True Alphas will not go around thinking, "I'm the alpha male here. I'm the man." All that is bla bla non-sense bull****...Alphas are those laidback guys who are enthusiastic about life and aren't afraid of expressing themselves and their emotions.

2. One characteristic of an Alpha is fearlessness. I am pointing this one out, specifically because fear was one of my biggest obstacles.

I have a teacher. She's the most intense teacher any student could have. Some students, a lot actually, have cried after being reprimanded by her, from 6'2 255 linebackers to "nerds." The funny thing is, she's maybe 60-70 years old, probably less than 100 pounds and barely 5 ft tall. She'll yell at you when you make the same mistake twice or are irresponsible or for most things other teachers let slide. This is the reason most average hs students dislike her. They think she's too serious and yells too much. I love this teacher though, in a student/teacher type of way of course. She's passionate about teaching her students. She genuinely cares about her students and wants them to be prepared for the "real world." She has taught me several lessons. But the one i will discuss here, is about fear.

Most students are scared enough of being wrong, especially in front of the class. But, they're even more scared to be wrong in her class because they know what might come of it. Here's a lesson from her, from memory:
"Why are you afraid of being wrong? I really dislike it when students are shy and afraid of being wrong. How can you go through life afraid of being wrong? Life is an opportunity to explore and discover. Don't be afraid of being wrong in this class when you try to discover the content. I have more respect for students who explore and might be wrong than for students who are afraid and only want to get by. Those students are wasting their time and lives. They never try AND put no effort into their lives. They might as well stay at home and sleep for the rest of their lives. If you want to succeed in my class, you need to stop being afraid of anything, being wrong or rejection or "failing." Your life can be GREAT if you want it to be. But you will need to be fearless."

I realized that my biggest problem was fear. I was afraid of rejection, which is common for most AFC's. Now, I know how stupid my fear was. I see the same girls i was afraid of talking to and don't know why i was afraid. If they reject me, what's so bad? You MUST be fearless before you realize this too, that your fears are DUMB AND UNNECESSARY.

3. Alphas aren't special really. They're basically MEN. They have the most basic mindset. You Woman + Me Man = Fun

An alpha sees a pretty girl. He walks up towards her. He greets her, with a little kino. He makes small talk, c+f/jokes around with some sexual innuendos. She's laughing and smiling. He’s making great eye contact and conversation and kino. HE, HE, HE ends the interaction because HE HAS HIS OWN LIFE (though you don't have to end every interaction...I’m just making this point because I see it too often...guys love the moment so much that they keep going until the lady decides to end it...and girls begin to realize he doesn’t have anything better to do, she knows, she has him hooked). This moment/interaction was no better to him than studying for his math test or talking with his mom earlier that morning. LIFE IS GOOD, EVERY PART OF IT. He gives equal value to all and everything. He receives equal enjoyment from all things.

As he walks off, the HB, still standing there, realizes that this man has his **** together.

He goes off to class, enjoys every second of it because he's learning new **** that he never knew before. On the way home, he enjoys the nature that surrounds him. Sings and dances to the music on the radio, even perhaps begins to talk to the radio dj like he's really there talking to him. He's happy. He gets home. He's happy to see his parents and asks them how their day went for two reasons. One, he's genuinely interested. Two, they appreciate it. He tells them how his day went BECAUSE PARENTS REALLY ARE INTERESTED IN KNOWING WHAT'S GOING ON IN THEIR CHILD/CHILDRENS' LIVES, if you don’t think so right now, you'll realize this once you have your own children. Then he does some homework/works out/washes up...then he has dinner with his family and they have a fun and interesting conversation. He puts his dishes in the sink and perhaps, if he has time, helps his parents clean the dishes. He proceeds to finish any business. If it's not too late (sleep is fcking rare in hs for me at least), he decides to go on SS to answer some questions. Goes on AIM for a short while to catch up with some friends, but not too long. Then he goes to bed happy and thoughtless. He has the best fcking dream. He wakes up excited for the day. Sings and dances to the radio. Takes a shower, eats breakfast. He realizes that high school is short, that he's off to college soon…that he'll miss his parents and those seemingly insignificant moments that turn out to be the ones you remember and all that they do for him on a daily basis. So he tells them he loves them and that he hopes they have a great day. He might give his dad a hug or more likely a pat on the back. He hugs his mom and might give her a quick kiss on the cheek. Then he's off to school. AND HE HAS ANOTHER FCKING AWESOME DAY.

He never thinks about life, instead he lives it. And, he does realize how extraordinary life is. Beautiful nature. Interesting people who have their own lives/stories. New things to learn. Girls to have fun with. Buddies to chill with.

____________________
I realize that I love my parents and could be a better son. I realize that a certain expensive item probably won’t make me as happy as I think it would. I realize that girls are fun but certainly aren’t the most important thing in life. I realize that my relationship with male buddies is just as important. I realize that school is more fun than I believe sometimes. I realize that every guy on this forum has his own life. Each of us is dealing with our own “issues.” Yet, we all probably have more in common. We probably have similar types of girls in our lives. We’re probably experiencing the same things.

I think this site has helped me A LOT. I used to dislike school and didn’t see daily life as anything special. I only saw books, girls, work, people, buildings, trees, cars, etc. But now, I’m almost always on a natural high. I’m amazed by the simplest things and smile/laugh at everything. I realize, with the help of my English classes and this site, that I was thinking too much. Now, I don’t think about things as much/at all. I see the beauty in everything and try to make every moment my greatest moment.

Being a DJ/Alpha, in regards to the ladies, is the simplest ****. Make good eye contact. Approach new women. Talk to the ladies and have fun. Use kino. Get numbers. Hang out. Escalate. She’s not interested? Who gives a fck, she can just be a friend then. You should already have other girls of interest dying for a chance to hang out with you because you’re an Alpha. You’re one of the few Great Catches. It’s that simple.

Work on yourself and your life = Ladies come to you
Realize the beauty in your daily life…in the things you never paid much attention to like walking to school or getting books from your locker.
Make friends with everyone, and approach all the girls you want.
Always seek improvement and perfection because it DOES exist when you try your best.
Live your life without fears and inhibitions.
Stop thinking. Love everything.
Life is simply Good.

the problem is that we read threads that tell us not to think, then we find other threads talking about body language, how to apply kino, what to say and do and what to avoid
basicly that is thinking, when I'm approaching right now, it's as if I have mental notes, keep eye contact, don't look down, don't fidget, don't be too nice.
after that I start obsessing over whether or not that changed anything...

I hate all this

bookman said:

the problem is that we read threads that tell us not to think, then we find other threads talking about body language, how to apply kino, what to say and do and what to avoid
basicly that is thinking, when I'm approaching right now, it's as if I have mental notes, keep eye contact, don't look down, don't fidget, don't be too nice.
after that I start obsessing over whether or not that changed anything...

I hate all this

Click to expand...

well think of it this way...i'm sure you've seen the matrix
and here's a conversation neo had with morpheus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSFTUNvM8M0

Neo: "What are you trying to tell me, that I can dodge bullets"
Morpheus: "No, Neo. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to"

you be neo...il be morpheus heh

Neo: "What are you trying to tell me, that I should think about body language, how to apply kino, what to say and do and what to avoid
basicly, mental notes, keep eye contact, don't look down, don't fidget, don't be too nice."
Morpheus: "No, Neo. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you own't have to."

Basically, you said it yourself. It's thinking for you. You said, "basicly that is thinking" Well, for me, there is no thinking going on. It's pure instinct. I don't think, "Ok kino now. Then talk. Then sit." I just do it. That's the point. Don't think about kino/how to do this/what not to do...just be in the present...And you'll be a natural.

This site has all that technique for no reason really. The SS forum has definitely changed directions from what its makers wanted. The creators of this site preached inner development. Now, people preach methods and techniques. Why you ask? TO MAKE MONEY. This site makes a lot 6 digits in advertisements i'm pretty sure. "Professionals" make thousands selling programs and giving speeches.

But notice, most of the articles by Pook and the greats don't focus on kino, conversation, etc. but instead speak of charm, confidence, etc. Pook didn't really explain how to kino; he simply said that you must kino. They know that kino is natural for men. Men must strip down to the essential nature of their being and after doing so, will not need to read about how to kino, but do it instinctively. Long ago, men didn't talk about how to get women because it was never an issue. There were no discussions or forums. Slowly, media took over and men became more insecure and AFC. They lost touch with their inner MAN.

I'm telling you to find that inner MAN because it will lead to a better benefit than just focusing on techniques/methods because the latter will only help in regards to women. The former will help you in all aspects of your life.

good post jeff!
you have come a long way, i still remember seeing your first couple posts on this site

I LOVED THIS. I've also noticed these positive effects in my life too (enjoying life EVERY day at EVERY moment, appreciating learning in school, almost always being happy) in the last few months. A LOT of it has to do with what I learned from the Bible that had NOTHING to do with females. It's changed my life in the most important ways: I'm definitely a better student, better athlete, better son, and better brother thanks to what I've learned. The most important ways I've grown have had nothing to do with girls.

this post is amazing. i remember i used to disagree with most of your posts jeff, but this one totally changes my opinion of you. its obvious youve changed since ive remembered too (i rarely check sosuave nowadays). i expected a lot of totally unimportant philosophical crap by confucius (nothing against him though, im half asian too buddy, you are too arent you?), too much thought into little things, a lot of dot dot dots, etc lol. but you seem to get it now. like john paul said, youve come a long way.
also, i can pretty much relate to this whole post. i went through and broke the 'thinking too much' stage and the 'fear' stage and also ended up in the 'life's good' mindset. i pretty much JUST discovered all the things you also just discovered. just recently, like barely more than a few weeks now, have i truly had happy, stress- and worry-free days. i have no thoughts about what i should do, it all comes naturally. if i see a friend, guy or girl, ill give a friendly pat or something and a cheerful 'whats up?' kino, confidence, a fun attitude, it all just comes to me now. i no longer sit there thinking about it. i just DO it. it really just happens once you clear your mind and stop worrying. its something you have to train yourself to do, so guys if this is your problem, dont expect to wake up tomorrow and have your mind clear just because you tell yourself to clear it. it took me personally longer than that, at least a few weeks, to learn to just STOP THINKING and go with it. you just gotta found out how on your own, its not really something you can explain to someone. just focus on figuring it out. because once you do, life literally gets way better. all the things you thought you werent good at, suddenly you can do, like suddenly i can kino just fine, and before i discovered how to stop worrying about it, i never kinoed ever. you ALREADY KNOW how to kino (and everything else), its (all) really a simple concept. you just need to stop worrying about it. you suddenly become, well, amazing. you can do anything. like what sageproduct said, you get better in a lot of ways that have nothing to do with girls. ive also been getting better at everything i do, not just girls. really you just get better in general to get better with them. heres an example:
i used to wonder why my friend was always better than me at almost everything, besides being half a year older. why was he so good at everything? how is that possible? its because of his mindset. he knows he can do anything. he just has to do it, and while everyone else is worrying about practicing that one thing, hes just as skilled at it. you know the type of people i'm talking about. the people who can try something for the first time and already be good at it. on the other end you got people who suck at everything they do. its all mindset. he had no more experience in girls than i did when we hit 'that' age where they became interesting, but he learned alot faster then i did. it was because he just DID it and learned and grew without thinking about it, while all i did was think, analyze, and worry about what to do. this is why he still has a headstart on me with them. hes had way more girls than i have.
but now that will change. i have finally learned what jeffthechef just preached. DONT THINK. its that simple. ive really learned and changed VERY fast since i learned to do that. i havent had a single bad day, and im happy ALL the time. from waking up to going to sleep, im having a blast, whether im chatting with a girl or typing this (and of course rocking out to my favorite music). and im doing things i never thought id be able to do by now. im growing exponentially (were doing that in algebra right now so i cant help relating it to that lol) i compare myself to just last week and im SO much funnier and cooler and happier and attentive. and everything. really, everything just gets simpler once you make it simpler. lifes simple. especially yours, your a high schooler, you dont even have a complicated job or children to raise. you spend at least some of your time wondering what to do. all you have to do is go to school tomorrow feeling good and you can take on whatever it throws at ya, and make friends with everyone in the process. its like what jeff said, we didnt think much when we were kids, why should we now, life isnt ANY more complicated, compared to what you can handle now. i mean yes its no longer as simple as just lets play tag and we can be friends, but your ALSO no longer a 9 year old kid that literally has a less developed and skillful brain. you can HANDLE more than that now, WITHOUT needing to make it more COMPLICATED. you can handle having to be a little more creative than 'lets play tag' to make friends, just like you can handle 'y=3e^6-x' now instead of '9x7'. nine times seven was just as complex and confusing then as the former equation is now, because now you are smarter. you dont have the brain of a 9 year old anymore. you have the brain of a high schooler. that doesnt mean the big picture is any more complex. still all your doing is going to school, getting good grades, making friends, maybe doing some extra activities, etc. its what youve been doing since you started kindergarten. its just as simple. jeff is so right on that one. i just had to expound(current vocab word, lol) on it, you know, cuz thats what i do.
i agree with everything you said. well, except for the ego part, it really depends on your perception of ego, but i believe ego is essential. but instead of TRYING to be a 'great catch', believe that you ARE the great catch. isnt that what you just told us to believe? isnt that egotistical? you know what ego is right?

Im too tired now but im definitely gonna take a look at this tomorrow

(Hey I'm half-Asian too!) NOYCE
And your teacher sounds entertaining!
but. yeah this is a really sweet post.

TheEnergizer said:

i agree with everything you said. well, except for the ego part, it really depends on your perception of ego, but i believe ego is essential. but instead of TRYING to be a 'great catch', believe that you ARE the great catch. isnt that what you just told us to believe? isnt that egotistical? you know what ego is right?

Click to expand...

I said, "You’re one of the few Great Catches. " Not to TRY or THINK you are, but that you ARE.

I don't think that's egotistical if it's a fact, and it only becomes egotistical when you believe you're the ONLY Great Catch and no other man can be your equal.

Consider this, you agreed with me about "Stop Thinking." Well, which (S/s)elf is doing the thinking? Is it your true being/soul that is thinking or your ego? To stop thinking, you must kill the ego because the ego is the one thinking. As you mentioned, you can't clear your mind in the matter of minutes, hours, or days. It's something you have to train. Buddhists call this training, meditation. Several of my English teachers had our classes do it.
"Close your eyes and clear your mind. Don't give rise to ONE thought." However, everyone struggled because they had egos. The ego, like man, is afraid of death. So when you attempt to stop thinking, the ego fights to make you think.

Humans think they're alive because they think; it's western philosophy.
I'm sure you heard this before, "Cogito, ergo sum." Or "I think, therefore I am." That little voice inside your head telling you, "I can do it. I can make it. bla bla," is the ego. Carmelo Anthony had a commercial that relates. He said that he practices the same shot hundreds of times so that when he's in the game, he doesn't think about the shot because he knows he can make it. When athletes are in the zone, they don't think about their next move, it's instinct. When you do something instinctively, there is no thought right? And the best players usually have the best instincts. They too, are egoless.

Thinking supposedly constitutes the being. So would we consider Buddhist monks who meditate and give rise to no thoughts to be DEAD?

So I say once again, Be the Great Catch...Don't think you are. When you believe you're the great catch, it has nothing to do with EGO unless you take it too far.

Ego tells you to think about kino, to think about conversation, to think think think. Ego-less Alphas have none of these petty thoughts. They simply do without thinking.

lmfao. i definitely agree with you guys. i enjoy everyday of life. People are always like "i never see you mad or anything wtf." Its cuz im always happy. You gotta take everyday as it comes, but i'm still having trouble with the overcoming fear of cold approaches. it just seems mad awkward but it'll some to me naturally when im ready. I just need to get deeper into that mindset of not thinking, i still hold myself back on somethings even though i do most of what i think. Great post btw.

Very nice post Jeff.
I think every who goes out and actually tries to improve his life realizes this at one point. Then, most of these pickup techniques posted here become obsolete, or at best simply simply supplements.

colombiandude said:

lmfao. i definitely agree with you guys. i enjoy everyday of life. People are always like "i never see you mad or anything wtf." Its cuz im always happy. You gotta take everyday as it comes, but i'm still having trouble with the overcoming fear of cold approaches. it just seems mad awkward but it'll some to me naturally when im ready. I just need to get deeper into that mindset of not thinking, i still hold myself back on somethings even though i do most of what i think. Great post btw.

Click to expand...

I agree with you spot on, its a sort of growing process. And what I'm noticing is that im getting better every day! About a month ago, I was a sad little boy. Now, to the public, or the untrained eye, I was as happy as could be, but inside I constantly dwelled on the bad things in life, the hardships, and struggles, most commonly, homework. (While homework wasn't the only issue on a long list, such as straight up stress, not getting out more often, not getting women and not really enjoying myself, i blamed homework as the root of the problem) I'd grieve and moan about homework because I've been getting straight A's for the longest time and frankly, I was just tired of it. I wanted to hang out with friends more, do other things! So I started slacking off a little, and you know what, that only made me feel worse, because it felt like I had accomplished nothing!!! But then one day...

It clicked in my mind, "To be happy, you must focus on the positive! Look at every day as an achievement and notice everything you did right, rather than what you did wrong" It was there that my life started to change. And then, I found this site, and it only got better, and will keep getting better! Thanks to articles such as these, and many other on this site, and the great advice from all of you, I am slowly growing out of that sad little boy stage. Now it is true that every once in a while, maybe a couple times a week, there is a slump, a small point where I feel weak and useless...Good thing it's only a slump, because I've learned to bounce right back. Everyday is a brighter day in which I am growing, not only in confidence but also in love and overall happiness (the womanizing skills aren't so bad either).

So thank you for this article and thank you SoSuave,
Let the Alpha/DJ training begin!

Awesome post Jeff. I love how you stress not to "think" but rather to act. Thinking too much is absolutely a terrible thing to do when it comes to girls.

Only thing I think you mightve gotten a little mixed up on was the ego. I personally view a man's ego, and by own ego, as simply a feeder to my confidence. I enjoy getting ego boosts from men and women, simply because it fuels my confidence and drive even more.

Thinking negatively about yourself, ("we're not strong enough. not big enough. not attractive enough. not smart enough. not funny enough. NOT GOOD ENOUGH), in my opinion isnt really an ego. Its more of a...residual doubt. Make sense? Doubt is also a huge inhibitor when it comes to getting girls. Never doubt yourself or think what I quoted above.

eaglez1177 said:

Thinking negatively about yourself, ("we're not strong enough. not big enough. not attractive enough. not smart enough. not funny enough. NOT GOOD ENOUGH), in my opinion isnt really an ego. Its more of a...residual doubt. Make sense? Doubt is also a huge inhibitor when it comes to getting girls. Never doubt yourself or think what I quoted above.

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I don't think we're ever going to agree on this...You're coming from western philosophy..

Any thought...positive or negative is a creation of the ego...doubt comes from ego...all thoughts come from ego...distinctions between right/wrong good/bad are all empty...there is no right/wrong good/bad in all honesty..
when we see duality, we still have egos...i would like to stop using those words...but then everyone wouldn't understand and my teachers would get pissed

read bruce lee's book on philosophy...he states it in a way easy for westerners to understand

why bother going over this though? You believe what you want..

jeffthechef said:

I don't think we're ever going to agree on this...You're coming from western philosophy..

Any thought...positive or negative is a creation of the ego...doubt comes from ego...all thoughts come from ego...distinctions between right/wrong good/bad are all empty...there is no right/wrong good/bad in all honesty..
when we see duality, we still have egos...i would like to stop using those words...but then everyone wouldn't understand and my teachers would get pissed

read bruce lee's book on philosophy...he states it in a way easy for westerners to understand

why bother going over this though? You believe what you want..

Click to expand...

Yea I totally understand the point your saying its just that I use different words to describe it lol. Its all good tho

Jeff
Good post kiddo. You're a lucky guy as you have gotten your sh!t together at a very young age. You obviously get it !

eaglez1177 said:

Yea I totally understand the point your saying its just that I use different words to describe it lol. Its all good tho

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i see
btw, i've seen you the most since i started
can you PM me..your box is full right now

jeffthechef said:

i see
btw, i've seen you the most since i started
can you PM me..your box is full right now

Click to expand...

Jeff I have had this problem with my "ego" lately. Like I keep seeing myself as inferior and I think way too much. I think that high school is driven by egos and it is hard to not have an ego.

Also when there is like a group conversation with people I don't know like that I tend to stay to myself. On the inside this is killing me because I feel that I am not as cool or attractive as the others.

How do I overcome this?

Jmac said:

Jeff I have had this problem with my "ego" lately. Like I keep seeing myself as inferior and I think way too much. I think that high school is driven by egos and it is hard to not have an ego.

Also when there is like a group conversation with people I don't know like that I tend to stay to myself. On the inside this is killing me because I feel that I am not as cool or attractive as the others.

How do I overcome this?

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most people in america have egos..it's all around us..
it's the belief children grow up with that the world revolves around them...
I..I..I..I...A teacher gave a good exercise once...Write a reflection of our day or week without using any references to the self..such as I or me

This is one reason why most religions/philosophies regard compassion as one of the more important characteristics...the ability to feel someone else's pain and care about others more than yourself..is hard to do for many...

You say you see yourself as inferior...well why?
BECAUSE YOU'RE COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS..AND YOU'RE MAKING YOUR JUDGEMENT BASED ON THINGS SUCH AS POPULARITY...that's the only reason why such a thought would arise

what's the solution? realize that everyone is born equal..and what sets the boys from the men are the things that SS talks about
Passion, integrity, confidence...all that ****

if you're a cheater, liar, conceited, etc...then perhaps you have reason to feel inferior...but if you're a good person, why feel inferior?

Don't compare yourself to others. There's no need.

The answer to your second question is the same. Stop judging yourself AND OTHERS...Only when you judge yourself and others do you begin to see some people as inferior and others as superior.

bookman said:

the problem is that we read threads that tell us not to think, then we find other threads talking about body language, how to apply kino, what to say and do and what to avoid
basicly that is thinking, when I'm approaching right now, it's as if I have mental notes, keep eye contact, don't look down, don't fidget, don't be too nice.
after that I start obsessing over whether or not that changed anything...

I hate all this

Click to expand...

Perhaps the thread starters wanted to remind people of what worked for them, so that others might also find success using their knowledge. There's no doubt that trying to keep track of all that information can be daunting, and attempting to utilize all this information can severely hinder you. In fact, the pressure to follow all the advice can create anxiety and fear.

Perhaps breaking down the information into bite-sized chunks that you can slowly incorporate into your daily routine would be best. For one, you wouldn't have to remember everything at the beginning.



Interestingly, it's when I don't think that I have my best conversations, and do my best public speaking, acting, and singing. It's almost as though my mind is blank, but at the same time what I need to say kind of just "bubbles" to the surface of my mind and I say it.
The drawback though is that if I consciously recognize that my mind is pseudo-blank(a form of thinking) and that I'm in the zone, the stuff I need to say stops bobbing to the surface and my mind goes literally blank. Then I stand there looking at the crowd for a few seconds as I go "uh-oh" to myself.