Yuppaz Field Reports of Trials and Tribulations

[yuppaz]

Did some more approaches this weekend. Trying to reinforce the idea of a girl as either a yes, or a no vs. a 1-10. This thinking has helped me greatly with being more comfortable with more beautiful women.

Fri Night - went solo to this event in Honolulu AAD. For a little while I was not very comfortable being out solo, but eventually ran into a chick I had flirted with in the past and that helped me open up a little.

Girl 1 - cute blonde with glasses I'd flirted with before. Saw her inside an art gallery and approached her as if I just recognized her (even though I noticed her before, but spontaneity and coincidence is better then blatant approach (more low key). We were talking about art with her and her friend and she told me there was some creepy head thing at the other end of the gallery. She was telling me where it was and I told her come show me instead. So we went over to it and it was really creepy. Had her take a picture of me with it. We chatted for a bit and in all honesty I could tell she was being shy and I was too, so I talked with them for a little while and excused myself.

Then walked around the venue a bit, talked to randoms briefly. Wasn't really feeling it very much and decided to leave. As I'm leaving I see 2 cute girls talking and smoking outside. I opened them by asking for a light, said sorry to interrupt their conversation. One girl said I should never be sorry. I told her I really wasn't sorry I was just being polite. They both laughed at that. Then the don't say sorry girl started telling me how she does kick boxing and will kick my ass (playful). She was trying to get flirty with me. I told her no way I would take her down and asked her if she was ready (also smiling so she knew I wasn't serious). The she tells me and the other girl she hurt her hand doing it. I took the opportunity to grab her hand and look at it, she kinda lit up at that. Then I told them there was this little girl inside the place like buddy dancing. Karate girl said that she would never allow her daughter to do that. I ask if she has a daughter. Then she says no, she would never squeeze a kid out of her vagina. I told her she could get a c-section, she then talks about how she would foster kids and how she was a foster kid herself. To me it's a couple of red flags, the fighting and the want to save other kids. I gave her a hug when she said that and I said that it was very sweet of her to do something like that. It made her feel good but I wasn't real sure she would be a good prospect to date, even though she was pretty damn cute. Then some surfer guy came in and asked for a cigarette. I was cool and gave him one and noticed her had a bandage on his foot, asked him what happened. He talked about being a surf instructor (He was trying to display his status...to the girls) and how he loved what he did and made great money doing it (lulz that was where he f*cked up), I gave him props and started talking to the other girl with an Italian accent.

more to come soon.

Ok, then I was talking with Italian girl, she was a very cute girl, very skinny, and with cool glasses. I told her I think they are cool and I like them. The thanked me and blushed a little. We are chatting and I was hugging her a little, then some guy comes in and goes "Are you hitting on my WIFE?!?!?". In the past I would have apologized and moved on, but I've been tooled out like that before with Miss Poland, so I've learned my lesson that dudes can be complete tools and full of ****. I looked at his ring finger, then at hers and asked HER if she was married to him. She laughs and says no. So I turn back to her and start talking again, ignoring him. He then comes over and starts talking to her and pulls her away from me. I don't give a ****, so I followed and the guy starts trying to lay into me, introducing himself as Giovani Cassanova. I say hey it's nice to meet you, I'm Don Quan. Then he starts trying to tool me by telling me he is gay. I say that's nice, I'm not interested. He keeps going and going. After a bit I would turn to the girl and start chatting her up blatantly now and hugging her close etc. Just getting really annoyed by this guy. I'm asking how they know each other, trying to maintain composure and be nice. If he had just said they came there together, or they were seeing each other I would have just said "cool, nice to meet you guys. Have a great night" but instead he was trying to be a prick. Needless to say, I made him look very foolish, insecure of his manhood, feel very small and insignificant and scared of me (and in a serious rage that he knew he couldn't do anything about) because he was being a ****. The girl was all about me, hanging onto me and touching me, but she came with the guy and It turned out the girl was on vacation for a week or so, so I decided not to go any further. I did hear him screaming in rage at me when I had left. Didn't bother to pay it any mind, let him seethe on that **** and ruin his trip.

I'm happy I stood up for myself in the end, but wish that it didn't need to go on like that. It really wasn't necessary. His ego was just destroyed by our little exchange. more to come on the next day.

 

[yuppaz]

A couple minutes after leaving her, I start talking to a group of two girls and one guy walking away from the event. One girl was with the guy, the other one wasn't. I asked her what superhero she was (event theme) and she said she wasn't one. I asked her what was under her jacket, she flashes me wearing this sexy ass bodice thing (titties all plumped up). I tell her I like that a lot. She is smiling, liking it. I make her and her friend and the dude laugh a little and as I leave to go to my car I ask titty girl where she is headed. She says a birthday event and asks me what I'm doing. I tell her I'm going home to clean house, I tell her I'm a dirty boy and need to clean. She says she is too. I ask her "Your a dirty boy?? laugh a little" and I tell her she should come help me. She considers it for a little bit but decides not too. Oh wells, if you don't ask you don't get. Would have been great if she came though.

Sunday - Went out to get some more practice in. Started kinda late, walked around a mall. Flirted with girls working, had some fun but not much came of it. Got approached by one of those Israely girls selling seat salt with oil in it. She told me she wasn't going to sell me anything. I though, ok cool so chatted with her for a while. She was actually a pretty funny, chill girl and I could tell she liked me. She was cute, but she had kind of an out of shape butt, so I was just friendly, chill and nice and made her feel good, then said goodbye.

Next one was also in a store, girl working there, was very flirty with me. I was asking about what mothers day present I should buy, but was in the mens section. She was giggling at everything I said and again I could have easily hung out with her but she wasn't my physical type (cute, but not really cute enough to put any effort in).

Next one was at a book store on her laptop. This one was very sexy. She was lean like I like them and wearing tight stretchy pants. She had a nice face, but wasn't exceptional or anything. I had orbited a couple times trying to decide if I was going to approach, then finally did after I noticed out of the corner of my eye that she did a double take on me (sure sign of attraction). I just asked if they had wifi in there. She said it was good, but that they had no outlets. she told me they had some in the other area (kids section) and I said something like "Oh but you need to sit in those little kiddy chairs" and smiled. She laughed a little and I could have / should have kept going, but I think because I opened up the convo so casually I didn't know where to take it.

So not that much going on, but lessons learned:

I'm really feeling good about the yes / no decisions instead of rating girls. Nothing good comes of that. A 10 is mentally out of my league and instantly palatalized and a 7 is so ambiguous that even if I liked her I would think I could do better and would care less. There is no winning there, either yes, I would like to get to know her as a man to a woman or no I would not.

Starting a conversation can be done with something really simple and easy that takes no thought, and there is no risk of any kind of rejection.

If she doesn't seem into me, it doesn't matter because a LOT of other girls are.

Touching is critical in connection building with the ones I do like

I don't have to DO anything, other then be there with the girl (present) and touch her. Then either bring her with me or make a plan for later. No killing the sexual tension, that is not allowed.

Working on allowing the rapport to build on it's own vs. forcing it is a huge differentiator of someone who is bad / good with women and someone who is great. Most guys try to force rapport, do something to create attraction, I just allow it to happen naturally (and it nearly always does)

Having a positive / friendly vibe with sexual UNDERTONES and listening to the girl makes her like you A LOT. It builds connection on a conscious and subconscious level. Just going for Alpha / dominance only hits the subconscious level, and only works (for me) in night time environments.

Connection and sexual tension is the key to success with women. I am working on building a rapport or connection with maintaining the sexual tension ( connection = comfort and trust and sexual tension = attraction and wanting more, easier to follow up).

note: Italy girl wants to stay in touch from Italy. She is such a sweet girl, she says things like "I'm so happy to hear from you!" in adorable broken english. Fugin love it.

 

[yuppaz]

At laaaaaaaaaaaast my tiiiiiiiiiiiime has cooooooooooooooooooome and it feels like a bed of roooooooseeeeeeessssssssss.

Things are really clicking lately. I'm pretty much just very relaxed, much more comfortable (FINALLY) around prettier girls. Their just the same as my moderately cute girls of the past. I think switching to the she is a yes or she is a no system vs. she's a 7.5, or **** she's a 10 - red alert all hands on deck, play Mr. coooooooooool!!!! system has made a big difference. I'm being way more genuine, more relaxed and having a lot more fun in this frame of mind. It suites me very, very well. I'm also noticing that I really like a certain type. I like sweet, loving, skinny, shorter then me girls with a good sense of humor.

I'm not negging anyone, I'm not trying to be dominant or more alpha than I already am, but I am naturally letting myself show some interest and touch the girls again (very, very subtly and lightly to give them some confidence in the interaction...people like people that like them...). I've been reading 60 years of challenge stuff and really just spending the time with the girls that seem the most interested and who I am the most interested in. I'm not allowing them to break the rapport (ignoring **** testing, plus it doesn't happen that much) and I get to be a nice guy, but a confident one with healthy self esteem.

I'm looking for self esteem in them and for signs of being unhealthy (too sarcastic, arrogant etc.) because life is too short to hang out with someone who doesn't lift me up and who I can lift up in turn. The ones who need the drama....I don't need. The ones who are just real and kind and like me for who I am are the ones that turn me on the most and are the easiest to meet up with later anyway. It all makes so much more sense this way. I want to be surrounded by good people who can love (sounds gay but idgaf) that can accept my love, not by people in a constant struggle to prove something to themselves or others.

It's pretty amazing what kinds of reactions you get if you are willing to show the girl you appreciate something about her (AND also have a fun time with her) she will reciprocate what you give and you can both feel amazing in the process. I f*cked up a couple times by VERBALIZING that I liked them, that is a mistake, but showing with my actions, expressions and touch and NOT telling them allows them to build the mystery while still getting the excited feelings about me.

GOLDEN
GOLDEN
GOLDEN

 

[macallik]

congrats Yuppaz. When things are clicking, everything seems so much more fun and less stressful. Keep us posted!

 

[yuppaz]

You're the man macallik! - read some of your journal and it looks like you are having the success that you have wanted...Happy for you & ya it's definitely much less stressful when things are clicking.

Few quick highlights on stuffs:

Talking to a girl from Italy - very exotic and classically beautiful. She is a very, very sweet girl and is excited to come back to live in my state and get together with me
- bella raggazzaaaaaa
Hanging out with a really sweet girl I've known for a while now. I'm honestly not that into her, but would just feel guilty as hell to break things off. It's probably really stopping me from taking more action with new girls I meet.

I meet probably 2-3 girls a week without really trying to. I'm very much drawn to the type I listed above. Very petite, sweet, pretty very feminine type of girls. Innocent good girls. It suits me much better then some of the skankers I've chased in the past and they seem to like me much more as well. Have noticed that European girls seem to like me a lot. It could be the same for American girls, but maybe they just play the game more here, they don't want to show you that they are interested. The Euro's don't seem to be afraid to show interest, which makes me show interest and it raises the attraction for both of us.

Couple notables:

1. A Miss Hawaii contestant (second runner up this year) - looks like a miniature (but hotter IMHO) Jessica Alba. See her at the gym, flirt with her in a ****y way, don't show overt interest because she see's guys go goofy around her all the time, I've seen it actually....who knows

2. Really sexy little surfer girl who was our waitress that I convinced to sit and have a drink with us while she was at work as our waitress, got the number made the plan.

3. Girl that opened my buddy outside of my buddhist temple, from Poland seemed really interested in me and said she is coming back this coming week. Will see how that goes.

4. Girl I met at a party a month ago. Apparently she was with her boyfriend when she was giving me the f*ck me eyes and I was all up on her. The guy was right next to her and they had a massive fight and I think she broke his nose and they broke up. She told me about it later (did not get her number but her friend gave it to her) when she was trying to sell me on some MLM thing. Very hot, very open but a total waif / bi-polar type girl. I'm proud of myself for NOT following up with this one, it shows character growth on my part.

Little punk drummer girl from LA - she's a writer and she just looks so happy to see me, I'm a guitarist / signer so we could make some beautiful PUNK music together. She seems really sweet

Chinese / Jewish girl (she likes to save the money)..lol - very intellectual & smart girl, get's hit on all day long (works at a mall stand place). I think she gets too much attention and it kind of spoils her, not all that interested. Maybe as a friend

Other girl from my temple, strange I keep running into her and I can't tell if she is feeling me or not, or if I am feeling her that much. It's very odd really.

Aside from girls, going to start a cut soon, added 16 lbs in the past 6 months or so with HST but not sure how much is fat vs. muscle. I know my chest is bigger so at least SOME muscle. For the cut I may be more traditional in my training vs. hst. more working sets + adding some cardio (hate that sh*t)

My boy is coming home soon, getting his room ready for him, really stoked on that one

Work is going very well, running the biggest project my company has ever done, and staying on top of things is rewarding but tough.

Trying to keep lines of communication open with friends, I really need to plan things in advance and invite more people to do them. That's been an issue for me, also HOW to invite so I don't get blown off...that get's me down when it happens.

Have been wanting to get more into my music. Going to sign up for guitar lessons this weekend to improve my skills / have some more structure with my playing.

 

[yuppaz]

Challongiiiing times for me lately. I'm not sure if it's because I'm seeing a shrink and that brings my insecurities to the forefront / makes me think about things too much, because my son is home now and seems to have somewhat low self esteem (I'm working with him to give him more confidence in himself) or just because I am LACKING issues and that isn't my default but for some reason it's almost as if I am looking for problems with life to latch onto in order to be comfortable. It's very strange and not at all positive.

I'm still chatting with Italy girl, she really wants to see me. I'm keeping the communication to a romantic slant with her, and I like that because it's honest.

I'm still (rarely) seeing this girl that I'm just not sexually attracted to. I'm allowing myself to be controlled by the guilt that if I bail on her, that I will hurt her feelings. Talk about needing to screen much better sooner, I only opened her at the time a while back and followed up with her because she said she was leaving the state in a couple weeks.....then she gets so into me she moves back here.

I do this a lot. I go after girls that are for one reason or another only here temporarily. I'm also not necessarily going for the sex (like I should) but going for the feelings of womanly attention and affection. If you read 60 years of challenge, you'll know that this is wrong. It definitely points to childhood (and continuing) issues of not enough unconditional love from my mother. Yup, that sh*t is still affecting me and making me NEEDY for affection. I'm a little ***** that way, at least I know now though so something I can identify and do something about vs. being a giant question mark and being unconsciously driven in my life.

Lately with women and people and socializing in general, it's almost like I've forgotten how to do it. I'm not very happy nor social at all. Women still seem to be attracted to me but I don't really do anything about it. I'm ok with that for now because I know that if I constantly go for it, it is to fulfill the wrong need. It should be because I want to f*ck her, but instead it's about needy affection. So I'm instead working out how to fulfill the need from within, or in healthier ways.

I'm reading this site too much as well. There is so much negativity and an underlying premise of "how to cater to what the girl wants" that it kind of makes me think I need to do the same, a subconscious thing really. It should be instead MUCH MORE about how to go about proper selection and internally driven self esteem and confidence. Not their fault, that's the frame / reality they live in but it still affects me. Need to stop reading it.

I'm really going to do whatever it takes to help my son to stop questioning himself, and believe in his own worth and to push through illogical fears. Who knows, maybe doing that for him will give me the realizations that I need to come to and the habits that I need to put in place to combat this deeply rooted poor beliefs that I hold today.

 

[yuppaz]

It's been quite a while since I've posted anything here. This is kind of a journal for me and I'm just continuing it because it's relatively anonymous and as long as the site remains it's all in one place. Not just about dating but my life in general....with a slant towards relationships...

So much of my time and effort, and thoughts have revolved around dating stuff in the recent past and on my inner game and how f*cked it can get. It's all rooted to nature and nurture both. I've tried with my new "understanding" of women and dating to help other guys out to just be themselves (real world not so much on here) and just go for it with any-kind girls. In nearly all cases they are trying to prove something to themselves and just get laid. So I stopped that because I saw that it was just creating a different type of neediness in them, and hurting the girls I helped them to meet (they just wanted to f*ck them and that's it).. I believe in karma, and I know that girls want the c@ck, they don't want regrets either, it just lowers their self esteem.

So I unknowingly was teaching flash game and building sexual validation junkies, not helping men increase their healthiness and happiness... plain and simple I wasn't qualified to teach that to other men, regardless of my own personal experiences. Most of the guys that wanted help had severe inner game, self esteem issues, and when they got good, those just got worse but they put on a ****y exterior to compensate, which attracted low value women who couldn't tell the difference, or also had this level of maturity and couldn't make those guys happy anyway.

I was teaching it because I wanted to get better myself. It helped to a degree and I was pretty confident, but my undercurrent of wanting was always there and no matter how many girls I f*cked it didn't go away. I built some bad habits in those days, I started seeing that it was relatively easy to hook up with girls, and I started to hate them for it. If it was so easy for me, what separated me from other guys & why isit that certain kinds of girls didn't want anything to do with me? Girls that just wanted to have fun were all about it, but those that had more self respect didn't want anything to do with me. You want what you can't have sooooo...

Now I wanted the psychologically healthy girls that would actually be difficult to do, because they seemed to know how I gravitated to running games, and trying for an outcome and they had all seen that sh*t and they just wanted nothing to do with it, or maybe they caught my deep seeded undercurrent of a lack of self belief that they had not noticed with the ****iness and coolness that I used to put out there.

To be continued....

 

[JohnChops]

Damn yuppaz... That last post was deep. I feel like I was in your place a little bit ago. I used to run all this game and pick up women , started to get easy, hated them for it, and now i too want the healthy girls who aren't insane.... But it's like i just attract what I've always attracted , crazy women.

do you feel like you have to validate yourself to these healthy women and that's why they don't go for you ? Or is it because they don't respond to the game you run and they want a self improved guy.

Im just thinking out loud, but i understand where your coming from . Oh great field reports btw ... A good read for sure.

 

[yuppaz]

Hey John - A lot of that comes from being internally self validated. When I'm doing the right thing even when it's hard and I feel my self esteem is high I naturally start to weed out the crazy ones and the more healthy ones seem to be much more interested in me (I'ts very strange but it's not at all like I am DOING something different, it's just sorta picked up on - goes to show you that your time is always better spent working on your character and self esteem / confidence then in getting it from outside of yourself. There are better healthier results all around.. it's tough to get there though if your a player or an ex-player like myself because you know what works with the damaged ones ;-) )

So I just broke things off with someone that I was kind of with for the past two years. I wanted to do everything I could to do it in the easiest way possible (for me) at first but after talking about it with my shrink she convinced me to do it the right way with the most integrity.

So I invited her over to my house, bought her some dinner and she vented some of the problems she'd been having. She liked to be with me because I always made her feel better and feel decompressed. She'd been having some issues lately, and I probably should have picked a better time because of that, but they didn't seem world shattering and it was killing me to have guilt over staying with her for too long and I had to let it go.

So I told her what was going on and at first it was all the things that I really liked about her and admired about her, then that she deserved to have better then I could offer her and that I wanted to stop with the intimacy and romance but keep the friendship because I valued her so much.

She went through crying and anger and had a lot of questions which I was very careful to be sure that she knew that I wasn't seeing anyone else (would only make her feel worse) and that this decision was not because there was anything that was wrong with her (in truth I lost attraction because she gained weight.. I tried to help her with that and she did well for a while but she wasn't able to stick with it) so that the hurt and the memory would be as little damaging to her as possible. SHe was always very kind and considerate to me and was always doing things for me. I held her, kept telling her how sorry I was and letting her cry the whole night. She had fits of feeling better and feeling ****ty, I was just there for her and comforting her and it sucked to hurt someone who I cared about but I felt like I did it the right way and for the right reasons.

I think this was the first time that I broke things off with someone in the right way and I am very proud of myself for doing the right and mature thing and giving myself and her some time for closure. The guilt that I was feeling for allowing her to kind of hold on (while she knew she was free to find someone else and she later told me she was open to it ((we talked about it before)) is now gone and I've been noticing girls are really paying attention. It's been quite a while now where I've felt guilt for sort of leading her on without wanting to do it and I realize I should have done it much sooner. Next time I won't be afraid to break things off sooner if they aren't working for me. I know it causes pain, but they will survive and I am 100% sure that whoever I am with will improve their life in at least some small way because of me, so I will be leaving them better then I found them, so no bad karma there.

 

[yuppaz]

Damn dude - I'm starting to think that my hunt for a perfect woman for me is just a fallacy. I was good. I didn't **** around at all. Kept everything 100% on the up and up.... and it still doesn't work out well. I'm thinking now that I will change my motivations in dating and start to ONLY try to hook up with girls because I want to f*ck them, with 0 desire to find a girlfriend or look for anything long term.

I'm really thinking of just being aggressively / manipulatively if I want selfish in all of my endeavors in life vs. being compassionate and giving slack, being understanding etc. Because looking back and looking around the guys that do just live better lives in general. They have better stuff, women chase them around, people all want their attention etc. And at the end of the day, everyone else is just selfishly looking out for themselves and not necessarily others, or me... So any attempt on my part to do anything for others will not be and has not been in most ways reciprocated. If that is how things really are, then I have no real reason to be a kind, giving person to anyone other then those who I know have no ability now or in the future to give anything back (like homeless kids etc.) where I know for sure that what I give is and always will be gone and I can set aside exactly how much I want to give. Everything else is for me and for my own gain.

I plan on getting into some serious study of Machiavelli and the 48 laws of power, whatever else I can get my hands on and start studying the art of fitting in as if I am just like everyone else while ruthlessly striving for my own ends of:

1. More material comforts
2. More money (and more KEPT for ME)
3. More social opportunity
4. More sex with hot girls (can be tied in with #1), short term only.
5. Putting in less effort to get more of 1 - 4

Winning will defined by creating the most value for myself with the least possible mental, emotional, or physical effort possible compared to what I get back.

I have tried to be "good" and it never worked out for me. As far as I am concerned there is no reward to being a stand up person anymore. There is no god, there is only what you can get out of life until you die. I am also pissed at myself for being good and faithful for someone who in the end isn't worth it....

Goal - Get the MOST with the LEAST, don't let anyone know I am that way, appear very innocent and friendly on the outside.

 

[yuppaz]

Long time no update. Wow that last post was so melodramatic. It's interesting reading sh*t you wrote a while back and seeing how much you have changed. Here are some major changes since I first came on here. Maybe some of things will help others.

1. I have REALLY worked out hard, and ate like a champ. I enjoy training and struggling to do MORE in the gym, it doesn't need to be crazy weights, just MORE then last time. I really like the dorian yates blood and guts training.

2. I am much more casual and relaxed around women, and I try not to give too much of my self away to them too soon. Women want to wonder about you, and ESPECIALLY want to wonder if you like them or not, so I toned down calling chicks beautiful, over communicating etc. It is now VERY important that she feels she is winning when she gets my attention. I was simply too available and too easy before.....

3. I only communicate to setup the date, and nothing else in between, it builds the anticipation.

4. I got into photography, and in that way have (to some degree) gotten over beauty. Now if she is just a model and not an underwear, published model she isn't that special.

5. I just try to have fun, listen to the girl and never fear to make the move when the window of opportunity arises.

6. When initially approaching a woman, I go either direct or indirect, but if I like her I will always tell her that I would love to get a drink with her, and try to set the date and time right there.

7. My skin was very thin before, I got butt hurt too easily. Women TEST to see if you are weak and bothered by what can come out of her mouth. Being unaffected by any of that garbage and not have your state affected in her eyes makes you trust worthy as a man. She wants a man, she wants to be told no, she wants a gentleman, and she despises and makes fun of weak men that try to make grand gestures for her attention. Women will purposefully not text you back for sometimes over a day + to see if you crack and start chasing her (after you ask her out or ask her a question etc.). If you crack, you lose. 100% of the time (well...with the women you really want)

8. I didn't know it at the time, but I had (and sometimes have) a very low opinion of myself. I never felt worthy of the women I wanted, and therefore would do supplicating and pleasing things, or be some kind of character to make myself think I was "good enough". That feeling of unworthiness made me act in ways that made the girl think I wasn't good enough for her. There is a reason why diagnosed narcissists are excellent with women...

9. Chat with everyone. Men, women, old people, dogs. Social lubrication is a real deal. If you make yourself social by talking to everyone when you meet an amazing woman you won't have trouble being relaxed and talking with her. It's only when you aren't warmed up that you can come off unsocial / creepy.

10. Be super chill, when in private it's time to make her comfortable, don't be afraid to touch her, kiss her, kiss her body, pull down her panties and **** her. She wants you to, otherwise she wouldn't be at your place alone. No means no for real, but I have never gotten lmr when I am patient with the girl make moves and guage where she is at. This is also the time to be the most dominant. Women love that ****. it's ****ing universal.

11. All average to hot girls have d*ck thrown at them all the time, you have to know your value, in your walk, in your talk you exude self esteem and confidence, and you KNOW you can have her, but you never verbalize that sh*t, it's unspoken and you actually can. The belief is what makes everything else happen.

12. Never ever ever chase relationships. Chase ass and personality yes but never that, let the girl reach out to you more often then you do to her 80/20 is good stuff.

 

[yuppaz]

Been a super long time since last post. I've been really lonely and not doing well lately. After a job loss I have ben slacking in dating etc. I decided to step up and get my **** handled, so starting this weekend I started approaching again after getting down some youtube videos of daygame.com. Sooo anyway here are approaches from the weekend.

Approach 1A - Went to a made in XX show for my state. Went to a booth where they sold clothes and met a beautiful model. She told me she wanted to be sure I reach out to her so gave me her instagram. It seemed good but shot her a message that night : "Drinks?" and didn't hear back. WIll try again later. She was really hot.

lesson: more rapport would have been good. Sexual tension was great. She seemed really into it but she probably needed to be more comfortable to follow up

Non approach 1B - Met girl (hot) and her boyfriend when the boyfriend was doing a gig. She kept eye f*cking me when we three were chatting and when he was playing and when we were all talking. She had an interest in photography so I took her social media so she could look at my work and I want to follow up. She was young and it prob won't last long with the guy (he was super nice guy ish) and she was throwing a lot of sexual interest my way. Haven't followed up yet.

lessons - I don't know yet.

Approach 1 - Japanese girl holding a map. super cute, young. Walked up and asked her what she was looking for, she tells me a coffee shop, I take her to it and get to know her. I tell her let's grab a drink and try to take her to a bar. We get to the bar and she says she is only 19. Oh well. I tell her it's all good let's go grab a bite at my place, and she starts hemming about having to go. I ignore it and start chatting with her more trying to get to know her. Pretty boring questions, did some little touching. She started having fun after a bit but because of language stuff I was kinda bored. Kept moving with her took er to another shop and tried to pull her home again, tried to make it light hearted "We'll have fun" etc. but she was pretty incredulous. I guess I couldn't give enough of a f*ck to care so I left her there.

lessons learned - pretty uncalibrated to try to pull her without turning her on first, I could have bounced her to food or something instead. Questions should be more open ended and lead stronger.

Approach 2 - Really hot girl in a store looking at glasses in womens section. Open by looking at them and ask if there are any for men. Banter a bit, tell her she is really beautiful. Ask her if she ever models and that I do beauty and fashion photography. She tells me she was Miss Teen in our state (yikes) so I switch gears to photographer and tell her it would be good to work together, but her mom would need to be there and get contact and get her to follow me on social media. Too bad she was really a beautiful girl. I should have known she was young with such good skin, say hi to her mom and take off.

Lesson - None really. As long as I am professional about it, it is ok. Just need to back off with any romantic interest if they are too young.

Approach 3 - More like a warm up. Started chatting up girl working in store at Macy's. She seemed into me. Nice tities but not enough my type to ask her out. Was good to get social momentum going

Approach 4 - Loooking at cheeses in a store and asked college age girl next to me about them. She didn't know and we both kind of laughed about it. She was interested, but I didn't close because she wasn't really my physical type. At this point though I don't know if I should just go for a few slump busters. I'm really not attracted but I could give her a good time and get a nut off, relax some and get my momentum going. just don't like the idea of hurting anyone by accident.

lesson - I did good by reading her shirt and asking about it. Also did good by being easy going and great way to open someone indirect.

Approach 5 - opened cute Japanese girl behind me in line to check out. Told her it was cash only when she pointed at the line. Told her I liked her hair and kinda questioned her why she looked so good just going to the store. She didn't bite too much, so I left it when she pointed out open line.

lesson - none really...except maybe better eye contact and don't keep throwing compliments

Approach 6 - Indirect with a beautiful girl in an aisle. Jokingly talked about dry peanut butter, she had a good sense of humor. Guessed she was from Columbia, wrong then guessed she spoke farsie and was right. asked her about herself. She was reluctant to talk about herself to me. She did ask me some about myself but not much interest. Tried closing by asking her to get together for a drink and she said she was shopping for her boyfriend. Told her good to meet her and good bye.

Lesson - My energy was kinda ****ty and body language was weak. I also called her beautiful which I know is kid of stupid, better to leave it with really pretty girls. I need to show more intent and get in closer.

Anyway I'm just glad I broke some of the f*ckin thick ass rust off, long way to go but I'm over being so lonely and not getting ass.

 

[MrWood]

Skimming over your thread is interesting, I used to live in Hawaii myself...

observations:

why are you telling women they are "beautiful" ?
overall you are pedestalizing on initial contact nearly every-time, you are not really building any mystery to them
your openers are direct, but seem like canned lines

 

[yuppaz]

Skimming over your thread is interesting, I used to live in Hawaii myself...

observations:

why are you telling women they are "beautiful" ?
overall you are pedestalizing on initial contact nearly every-time, you are not really building any mystery to them
your openers are direct, but seem like canned lines

Thanks for the feedback. That's what's on my mind at the time, but saying that doesn't help my case at all. I think my banter isn't the greatest because I am so rusty. I'm more in my head about chatting these girls up then just having fun and not caring at this point. Working on that. Your right about not creating any mystery at all, and looking at this past weekend I never really opened any of these girls direct, they were all situational openers vs. more direct and about her.

 

[yuppaz]

Just a quick update. Went out at night to try to meet some girls at a fancy event in my town (AAD). There are usually some beautiful girls here. There were last night as well.

I put myself in a positive mood before going, and did get a bunch of eye ****in / girls hovering and checking me out headed my way AND I would open the girls I liked, however I was not pushing the conversations past opening at all. I was not stacking and in an environment like that attention was drifting off asap. I really am adverse to trying to entertain girls, I think it sends off the wrong message about me chasing them, so if I plan to continue doing night stuff I need to find a way to balance those 2. Stack and not dancing monkey.

Nothing came out of it really. Kind of disappointed to, the event is only once a month and I really did see some beautiful girls I liked.

The positive was that I really didn't at all feel undeserving of some of the prettier girls there. That is definately improved as I improve my self esteem and get out there more.

 

[MrWood]

open the girls?
pushing the convo?
stacking?

this is not a PUA site, and getting girls is not about "opening a set" or whatever the fvck "stacking" is.
Perhaps you need to try "pegging"?

 

[yuppaz]

GTFO...Who the **** are you? What the **** do you know about what this is or is not? I've been working on my field reports here for years. When I want to get into the swing of things. What the **** have you done you ****in keyboard jokey? Beat it...

open the girls?
pushing the convo?
stacking?

this is not a PUA site, and getting girls is not about "opening a set" or whatever the fvck "stacking" is.
Perhaps you need to try "pegging"?

 

[yuppaz]

So that aside.

Sat and Sunday I tried to make an effort to approach way more women during the day. Try to get more numbers to work.

Really f*cked the weekend up. I only approached 3 girls in 2 days. I was wandering around all over looking for attractive girls and either of what things happened:

1. I barely saw girls that I thought were attractive enough...and I looked a lot
2. The rare chance I did, I wasn't approaching them.

When I did approach them, I was an idiot.

Here is the breakdown:

1. Approached girl working Wal-Mart. Cute Filipino, younger. She was giggling at what I was telling her but couldn'the close she didn'the want to get in trouble


Sunday:
1. Approached girl alone working at a kiosk. She was feeling me. Held her hand for a while too long teasing, flirting. Then I close telling her we are going to grab a drink and she tells me she would but she is married....I look down and see a ring...****

2. Probably the most legit girl I've seen for the weekend I was leaving feeling **** for not approaching much at all and saw a really.solid beauty. She was with her mom and sister but I had to try something. So I opened her up asking if I had seen her on a magazine or something. I played up being a photographer and that she should shoot with me. Got instagram name and reached out through that.

I'm glad I did SOMETHING and opened my mouth after such a **** weekend but it was a lame cop out to take that route.

Next time I get out I'm going to chat up girls I'm not super attracted to and date just so I'm not so in my head.

 

[MrWood]

you held her hand, but didnt see a ring
she let you hold her hand, but married

next time:
be observant
respond with, "I asked you out for a drink, not if you were married, so I will meet you back here at X'o-clock"

opened her up asking if I had seen her on a magazine or something. I played up being a photographer

this is what women call "a line", and they see you as completly FAKE and DESPERATE.
women/girls see right through this complete BS, and will cause you to loose everytime
(btw, I am 50 and live in supermodel territory, to date I have seen exactly 1 woman from a cover)

hint:
loose the contrived BS "lines" and just be yourself. Ever had a convo with a girl when you weren't out "looking"?
remember how after you said to yourself "oh wow, I bet she was interested in me, i wasn't even paying attention at the time"
do that from now on

 

[yuppaz]

Dude I feel like a total idiot. There is this girl who modeled for me for a long time that I have wanted. I've kinda put it out there to her but didn't make any moves because she had a boyfriend, my problem is that I was very attracted to her or the fantasy of her. Total slip, shouldn't have happened but it did, I told her one day after dropping her off from hanging out that I loved her, and she said that she lived me too. So I didn't make a big deal of that in front of her, because I wasn't sure if we both meant it in the same way. I went the next week without knowing and she put up there on my facebook that she loved me, boo. Which was a new thing she had never done before. So now I'm wondering if maybe she did mean it in a more romantic way. I take her out to kind of feel her out and was keeping things more platonic and still couldn't tell, then at one point she starts fishing for compliments on her looks so I think for sure she is interested in a romantic way, but the later in the night she made me think otherwise. I left dissapointed that night. Later she sends me a Christmas present saying "love xxxxxx" . So then I'm thinking we are on. I ask her out for last night. I take her out she looks great BUT before we even reach the restaurant she tells me that she is having her boyfriend come to see her parents for Christmas, it just came out naturally in the convo. In my mind I am thinking **** me, she was definately just meaning plotonic love, because rhere is no way that she is in love with me and introducing her bf to her parents. If anything she would be not talking about him or certainly not inviting him. So now I feel like a total chump, already promised to take her out to dinner. Took her out, struggled through it without looking affected. I did bring up a conversation I had with this other girl amd she seemed to get green real quick, but **** it doesn't matter. She can be jealous in other ways... She was also talking about other guys several times and saying how she thought it was sexy when a musician had range and kept checking out the musician at the restaurant. Fuuuuuuuck. It was a trip too, because night before i talked to this girl who was telling me how she had to break things off with this guy she "loved" because he wanted more. That seemed so foreign to me for her to so easily seperate out friendship type love from romantic, but I took it as a learning lesson for what i could have been going through, and last night was a confirmation of that. I feel like such an idiot and like I wasted so much emotional energy on this girl. She also told me how she was scheming on craigslist to resell **** she found. It was a new side of her I had missed before and now I wonder if she was playing me because she wanted photography and good dinners. I should be ok with keeping things totally as friends, but no more taking her out and no more spending time unless I'm banging some other girl(s). This was such a huge mistake to make.