Your Greatest Weapon - Indifference

[BeDJ]

Ever had a girl go silent?
Ever sat by your phone and wait for her call/text?
Ever wondered why she flaked on you?

Why is there that uneasy feeling in your stomach? Because you cared too much. The thought of losing her scares you! And that is why you will lose the girl.

No, I'm not going to tell you to think you are the prize, find hobbies, spin plates, make her chase you, etc. These are the byproducts of becoming indifferent.

No matter how good you are at something, there are 10 other people that are better. Do your best, accept the rest. Stop demanding joy, attention and friends. Allow people to disregard you, it's fine. You have probably done it to others.

Who you are should never depend on externalities like your image or possessions. Every externality can fade (looks, fame, power, money, etc.) Become ZEN!

Indifference means you are in control of your emotions and your own true happiness. You will make decision based on your happiness and rules. You are conducting the greatest show on earth - YOUR LIFE

She didn't give you her number - Oh Well
She flaked out on a date - Whatever
She hasn't responded - Ok
She won't put out - So?

I PROMISE YOU that you will start spending time with highly interested women.
I ASSURE YOU that you will attract women you want.
I GUARANTEE YOU that you will be happy.

 

[PapiChulo]

Solid post, sir. I feel that folks need to be reminded of that often.

 

[spang]

No matter how good you are at something, there are 10 other people that are better. Do your best, accept the rest. Stop demanding joy, attention and friends. Allow people to disregard you, it's fine. You have probably done it to others.

Who you are should never depend on externalities like your image or possessions. Every externality can fade (looks, fame, power, money, etc.) Become ZEN!

Indifference means you are in control of your emotions and your own true happiness. You will make decision based on your happiness and rules. You are conducting the greatest show on earth - YOUR LIFE

i agree with this. i study zen in my spare time. we are not our thoughts, we are not our ego, or the things we own. we are the consciousness that is aware of thoughts. indifference here would be non-attachment to the outcome.
but i do find some conflict with it. i still cant implement correctly. i feel like i NEED a woman to be happy. ive spent a lot of time alone, way too much. so that desire fvcks everything up i think.

 

[teakroy]

Bookmark. Good post.

But takes time.

Meditation and hypnosis can speed up the thing.

And workout exercise.

Music . And you are on a road to unleash your true alfa instinct and power.

 

[betheman]

Bookmark. Good post.

But takes time.

Meditation and hypnosis can speed up the thing.

And workout exercise.

Music . And you are on a road to unleash your true alfa instinct and power.

Hypnosis?

 

[teakroy]

Hypnosis?

Yes they are on internet some tracks free avaible.

But if you have a good microphone you can learn to make your free self-hypnosis track if you are more comfortable to hear your own voice.

You simply go in your deep of your mind and make change's you wish.

But patience is the key.

 

[BeDJ]

i agree with this. i study zen in my spare time. we are not our thoughts, we are not our ego, or the things we own. we are the consciousness that is aware of thoughts. indifference here would be non-attachment to the outcome.
but i do find some conflict with it. i still cant implement correctly. i feel like i NEED a woman to be happy. ive spent a lot of time alone, way too much. so that desire fvcks everything up i think.

Why do you need a woman to be happy? Is it sex, validation, companionship? When you seek happiness outside of yourself, you will be outcome dependent. This will reek of desperation and failure will absolutely ensue. Indifference should be a mindset for your emotional and mental well-being.

 

[MisterD]

It works but only on girls that already have some level of interest in you. If they are interested in you and you show indifference, you can gain the upperhand.

Don't think you're going to take a hot girl who has plenty of suitors and no interest in you and expect her to bang you just because you're not one of her afc orbiters.

A lot of the stuff taught here only works when the girl is showing interest. The problem is some men try to use this stuff to get girls who display no interest and then get upset that it's not working.

 

[BeDJ]

It works but only on girls that already have some level of interest in you. If they are interested in you and you show indifference, you can gain the upperhand.

Don't think you're going to take a hot girl who has plenty of suitors and no interest in you and expect her to bang you just because you're not one of her afc orbiters.

A lot of the stuff taught here only works when the girl is showing interest. The problem is some men try to use this stuff to get girls who display no interest and then get upset that it's not working.

Agreed. This site needs a pop-up disclaimer

The information provided by SoSuave makes no representations or warranties of any kind, express or implied, if a b!tch does not have interest in you. Any self-delusion you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk.

 

[youngmack]

It works but only on girls that already have some level of interest in you. If they are interested in you and you show indifference, you can gain the upperhand.

Don't think you're going to take a hot girl who has plenty of suitors and no interest in you and expect her to bang you just because you're not one of her afc orbiters.

A lot of the stuff taught here only works when the girl is showing interest. The problem is some men try to use this stuff to get girls who display no interest and then get upset that it's not working.

I agree completely....Now i have two questions..

1. How exactly do you become indifferent..?

2. How do you get a hot girl who has plenty of suitors?.. Knowing that being indifferent wont work and wont get you noticed

 

[sylvester the cat]

I agree completely....Now i have two questions..

1. How exactly do you become indifferent..?

2. How do you get a hot girl who has plenty of suitors?.. Knowing that being indifferent wont work and wont get you noticed

you become indifferent by letting go.

caring about something is due to an investment of sorts.

an extreme example is fear of dying. once you let go of your need to live you become largely indifferent and no so scared of dying.

once you let go you wont care that your indifference wont work or get you noticed by the hot girl. which in turn might very well get you noticed.

 

[BeDJ]

How do you get a hot girl who has plenty of suitors?

You follow the dating process - number - date - sex

Should you care that she is hot? No
Should you care if she has plenty of suitors? No
Should you care she dropped out of the dating process? No

What's the opposite of indifference?

Eagerness - Desire ~ Desperation

Are you eager to call/text?
Are you eager to hang out?
Are you eager to have sex?
Are you eager to get into a relationship?

Be Indifferent

 

[Naughty Ninja]

You follow the dating process - number - date - sex

Should you care that she is hot? No
Should you care if she has plenty of suitors? No
Should you care she dropped out of the dating process? No

What's the opposite of indifference?

Eagerness - Desire ~ Desperation

Are you eager to call/text?
Are you eager to hang out?
Are you eager to have sex?
Are you eager to get into a relationship?

Be Indifferent

Reminds me of a recent conversation with a cute chick at work I had. I'd been talking with her a few months doing my own thing though got all signals that she was single. A few of the conversations she mentioned getting high on weekends and even before work. I'm not into drug users. I kept it cordial.

The other night I was passing by where she works as I haven't been in for a week due to a pinched nerve and she asked where I was. After I told her what happened she just happened to all of a sudden mention her boyfriend had the same problem. (Most likely some new guy as I never heard her mention a boyfriend before.) Now I could've gotten pissed since she is pretty good looking but I was indifferent. I talked as if I never heard it and after a minute or so walked off. (I had a feeling she purposely threw the BF thing all of a sudden to see how I'd react as previously her friend asked me in front of her if I was and then why I was single. To which I responded I like my freedom. Also the same day, yesterday of our last conversation just before she saw my sister come in to visit me though she doesn't know her and most likely got kindof jealous. lol)

In the end though she is pretty hot and said her BF statement I just remained indifferent as I'm not interested in chicks who smoke weed...and from previously speaking with her it sounds pretty often.

Keep it Zen like dudes.

 

[st_99]

Man.. there is almost nothing worse than that fvcked up AFC feeling you get when you're afraid of losing a girl. Its so pathetic. Like a junkie needing a fix. LOL. The panic, the obsession, the fear, the anxiety. Its just so bad.

 

[VladPatton]

I agree. What the hell else CAN you do? Digest your own stomach away while she could give 2 shyts about you? Not worth it. Indifference will keep you quiet, calm, it will protect you, you'll appear cooler and not needy to her, and it will keep you from going insane from flakes and things ending abruptly.

You shouldn't put any more effort in it than she does.

 

[VladPatton]

Man.. there is almost nothing worse than that fvcked up AFC feeling you get when you're afraid of losing a girl. Its so pathetic. Like a junkie needing a fix. LOL. The panic, the obsession, the fear, the anxiety. Its just so bad.

You said it, broski. Never again, phuck that!

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Man.. there is almost nothing worse than that fvcked up AFC feeling you get when you're afraid of losing a girl. Its so pathetic. Like a junkie needing a fix. LOL. The panic, the obsession, the fear, the anxiety. Its just so bad.

You simply have to sit by yourself and think: Why in God's name do I need this person to feel complete as if I'm a broken person on my own.

My ex and I had a lot of good times but I had to end it. She had serious family issues and I saw it creeping up constantly. I left her without looking back. Only learning from the past experience. She got married like a year later and had a kid. Was I mad she did and I was "alone"? Hell no. I was happy I'm complete on my own and even happier it wasn't me that wound up marrying her. It would have been a huge regret. Fvck that.

 

[teakroy]

So in just a word.

Be Unreactive to all sh#t tests.

 

[floydb25]

Yes. You also shouldnt care what other people think of you. Everyone has their opinion, and its not in your favor. Cant let haters bring you down, succumb to societal / peer pressure, or try to be accepted. A lot of people try to land a hottie to prove to OTHERS that they can / are good enough, and will endure any amount of BS to keep dating them. Or accepting any kind of pseudo-relationship to keep the perception alive. Granted, theres a lot of ego, competition, and criticism among people (ie, if you cant land hotties, youre ugly and not good enough). Insecure, pathetic losers judge others based on their status. Pay them no minds. This is their entire mentality and lifestyle. You dont have to prove **** to anyone. Nor should you associate with such fags. Most of them never amounted to ****.

Whatever you do - do it for you. **** what everyone else thinks. And dont let them tear you down - because they want to see you fail, and will be right there to gloat when you do. They matter not. Let them believe whatever they want. As long as you know the truth - which you dont have to explain to anyone.

 

[NewAndImproved]

Indifference is very powerful. I'm a guy who always used to take himself and others far too seriously. Now I only give as much as another person gives me. The bar has been lowered -- to human terms -- and rather than feeling a letdown, I like people more and relate to them much better.

The other week I had to give a big pitch to six different groups. The old me would have been terrified but I had a blast. I killed it too, except for the last group where I had the nerve to lose my train of thought for like 5 seconds.

This (unattractive) woman made a snide remark about it and I give her a huge smile and said "yeah, what gives! How dare I mess up a little!" and continued from there.

I used to be my biggest critic. Life's too short for that. And to hell with anyone else who cares that much.