Your attitude on a girls night out

[Zeph]

Originally posted by Kaine
This article was written by a girl and suggests that its good for the guy for the girl to have their girls nights

Do you believe that in practice that this is true in all the stated points?

From a woman's point of view yes. Remember they don't think the way we do.

Originally posted by Kaine
Do you usually endorse that she go out, deny her or leave it up to her?

The way I see it, is when I'm in a LTR, I have either 1) made an agreement of monogamy or 2) not. If it's 1, I believe that I'm a smart enough judge of character to believe that she's good for her word. If 2, then there's no agreement to violate no problem.

The presupposition here is that a woman being with other men is a bad thing. It's not. Who cares? (The only exception is in regards to pregnancy, safe-sex and disease). If you know that you have unlimited choice, and can find a woman within a week, it doesn't matter if she stays or goes. Life is like a river; it's constantly flowing. People come and go.

Originally posted by Kaine
Has actively insisting she have her girls night influenced your LTRs positively or negatively?

Positively.

I kick them out the door.

Me: Get out! Go play with your girlfriends!
She: What are you going to do?
Me: I'M going to go play with MY girlfriends too.

Works like a charm.

 

[penkitten]

lol

 

[JohnJones]

All the folks above who pointed out that there's a big difference between dinner and drinks, even (heaven forbid) at a bar, and going bar hopping/clubbing/dancing are right.

Not to threadjack, but I just can't help it -- how about the "girl's weekend"? Say, the difference between Vegas and the spa.

 

[Junior Sanz]

im not ashamed to admit that i failed miserably this past weekend when i became very antsy after a long day of drinking and partying that i decided to show up at the same bar that my girlfriend was spending a 30th birthday get together with.

if i didnt drink i would have never made the decision to go there. but it definitely dissappointed her by seeing me there. she knows it was because of the booze because when i am sober im a straight shooter and make wise decisions. she hates when i drink and i need to get my act together because i got to much to lose if i dont.

anyways, make a long story short. after reflecting on my poor decision making and apologizing, she forgave me and we are moving on with this. Never for me to do this again and for me to really consider get help or cutting the drinkin out cold turkey!

bottom line is, if you plant that seed of doubt in your head thinking that she is banging some other dudes or flirting, getting numbers etc. she might as well be because it already in your head.

like some previous advice that was given to me, KEEP YOURSELF OCCUPIED. dont think about all the stupid stuff, when you know deep down that you found a "lucky one".

 

[bud1971]

A lot of times that "seed of doubt" that the feminist culture tells us to repress is actually our Spidey senses telling us to get out of this relationship.

 

[Zeph]

Originally posted by bud1971
A lot of times that "seed of doubt" that the feminist culture tells us to repress is actually our Spidey senses telling us to get out of this relationship.

Brilliant!

 

[Junior Sanz]

bud,

i agree with you but what ever happened to taking risks?

wtf am i talking about? after reading one of rollo's posts about marriage im reconsidering my whole perspective on this girl in particular. she is 29 and i am going to be 25 in sept.

i should be in my prime right now, instead im following the wrong footsteps!

 

[dietzcoi]

Junior

If you have to apologize to her, if you advocate sitting at home finding something else to think about while your GF is out partying, then

YES you need to get out of this relationship.

And don't be an apologizing AFC either!!!!!!

Now I feel like PR_L, may he rest in peace.

Dietzcoi

 

[bud1971]

Risks are okay, I guess......but why are you the only one taking them. Trust me bro, you deserve the kind of girl that would not ever think of doing anything to upset you. The kind of girl who will think "how is this going to affect my relationship" before doing anything.

If you really care about someone that is how you should approach any activity or situation that could cause conflict. That is my problem with girls night out. We all know what goes on and why girls go to bars. "I just like to dance" or "I just go to talk to my friends"....yeah right, more like I go to see if there is anything better out there or get my ego stroked. Chicks that do this are selfish and don't care about your feelings. You can never change someone's behavior or control them. If this relationship is not what you want at this point, where will it be 5 or 10 years from now? You are never wrong if you break up with the girl. There are plenty more where they came from. Eventually, you will find someone whose attitudes, habits and morals match up with you perfectly and there is no compromise.

Until then, I recommend having sex with nineteen year-olds.

 

[Junior Sanz]

LOL (about the 19yr olds)

I trust my girl. Yea, i know what goes on at these places but she hardly ever goes to these places to begin with. maybe once a month, if that. but July is a big month for her friends birthdays as well as hers. hence, back to back weekends of her going out 1 night with her girlfriends a week. all of which are either married or engaged. (my gf is 29) so we are not talking about immature little girls here, say 19-22 for that matter.

I understand what your saying if your talking about chics that make it a priority to go out with their friends constantly not worrying about you and your plans. yeah, than thats a selfish broad that needs to get the boot.

 

[Junior Sanz]

dietz,

I apologized because my behavior at the time was definitely inappropriate. just because i apologized im not being a AFC.

Im taking responsibility for my actions and being mature enough to admit when i am wrong.

there was reason for me to drink as much as i did and get behind a wheel of a car.

 

[FratAndDiddy]

good thread

i've learned alot about jealousy over the years. if a woman wants to go out with her friends then open the door for her. it doesnt mean i like it, but it isn't worth worrying about.

if i were in a LTR, i should know at this point what i am dating. anyone with any common sense would know whether or not they are with a ho or a decent woman. if you have any doubt, then figure she is a ho.

being a single fella, i encourage all women in LTR's to go out on the town. the more, the merrier.