Younger gal gives her number. Help please.

[V2Logger]

Hello fellas. I have been easing my way back into the single life again after a 5 yr LTR. NC for more than 5 months. Anyway I get invited to a friend's family party yesterday. I had dinner and some drinks. Needless to say there was one single gal there. She actually sat next to me while I had something to eat. I didn't think she would since she did appear younger to me. Turned out she was 21, I thought she was younger.

I didn't go there to hook up nor was I trying, her parents were there. She had some drinks that she was making. We began to talk since the rest of the older crowd was talking and laughing. I can honestly say this girl is very attractive, but I kept the conversation going. She is still going to school, and is studying interior design. Earlier I let my friend's mom know I just bought a house and she over heard.

Ok, so during the conversation, she tells me whenever I am ready to let her know because she can help me with styling the place. I was like cool, asked "do you have a card?" she said no so then I asked her for her number. Gave her my phone, and she actually programmed and saved it to my phone, with her full name. I asked her later does she do anything else other than designing interiors, like if she wanted to hang out or something, she said, "call me".

So I am in the need for some type of guidance here. See, I am 33, she is 21. What is the right direction from here? Should I bother for something other than some help with decorating and styling? Is this too much of an age gap? I mean I have been with someone 7yrs younger but not more than 10. Should I keep it plain? By the way I haven't called her, I just got the number last night. If I do call her should I wait longer? Help please.

 

[Poonani Maker]

NO! It is Not too much of an "age" "gap." I've had countless younguns dream up crazy sh!t about me in my early 30s. The thing to do is to not give anything away about yourself. Let the young ones use their imagination. They are so far from reality, with immense imaginations. Let them develop their own conclusions, as they are almost always amplified and Wrong about you. 17 is "too" "young." Everything else is fair game. In fact, I do not want any who are not young, who are already scarred up and marked. When women get mid 30s, they begin to think that they KNOW more than us men. They seem to no longer "follow" and stick by our sides like a devout woman in love should, the gap gets larger and they begin to think you no longer know what's best for them, that they know what's best for you. That they somehow grew a brain, and can make decisions on YOUR behalf now.

 

[jnice48146]

I have to agree with the above reply. I just got out of an LTR with a chick my age (32), and she thought she had it all figured out, like she was trying to game me. That **** didn't work, I felt disrespected, and went NC on her. Now I'm trying to focus on younger ones for the reasons mentioned above, plus most of them have nicer bodies unless you can find the rare 30-something chick that hasn't had any kids yet.

 

[Slickster]

I didn't go there to hook up nor was I trying

Now that you are back in the game you should have the mindset that you are ALWAYS ready to meet someone. It's not something you turn on and off. You don't walk out the door thinking "OK now I'm trying to hook up." Just always be on your game. You never know.

Ok, so during the conversation, she tells me whenever I am ready to let her know because she can help me with styling the place. I was like cool, asked "do you have a card?" she said no so then I asked her for her number. Gave her my phone, and she actually programmed and saved it to my phone, with her full name.

When gauging a chicks interest, actions always speak louder than words. Tough to tell exactly how interested she is based on your description but it sounds like there is "some" interest there. She could be interested in you purely on a professional level but the only way to know is to test her.

I asked her later does she do anything else other than designing interiors, like if she wanted to hang out or something, she said, "call me".

Perfect chance to ask her out right there. Then you know right away what her interest level is. Find out what kind of things she is interested in and use that to your advantage. Don't be wishy washy.

So I am in the need for some type of guidance here. See, I am 33, she is 21. Is this too much of an age gap?

She is an adult. I see no age gap here.

What is the right direction from here? Should I bother for something other than some help with decorating and styling?

Your attitude is wishy washy again. Your words "Should you bother" are wrong. You aren't "bothering" her! You are doing her a favor by honoring her with your presence.

Should I keep it plain?

Absolutely not! You should keep it fun and exciting! Call her and set up an action type date. Base your date on the interests she has expressed earlier. Something where you actually go and do something active (ie. biking, swimming, hiking, mini-golf, the museum, whatever).

It doesn't sound like you have much to go on in terms of her interests so you might want to set up a simple coffee date. A quick meeting where you can get together and chat without any pressures of an official date. Find out some things you both like to do and use that later.

If you are the type to get nervous about asking a chick out, then the wording of your question might help you immensely.

"Do you want to go for a coffee?" vs. "I'm going for a coffee do you want to come?"

Both questions seem to be very similar but if she says "no" to the 1st one you have been rejected. If she says "no" to the 2nd you were going for coffee anyways right?

By the way I haven't called her, I just got the number last night. If I do call her should I wait longer? Help please.

There are no set rules for when to call despite what other people might tell you. Your only objective is not to appear too desperate or too available. You want to project an image that you are fun, busy, and in demand.

Based on your brief description I'd say that you should call fairly soon. It doesn't sound like her interest level was super high so you probably want to strike while the iron is at least warm.


Hopefully some of these suggestions will help you out.


Good luck.

 

[sodbuster]

The only disadvantage to a young woman is sometimes they are into drauma and you feel like a guest star on an MTV reality show.