You know what the hardest thing about chasing women when you get older?

[squirrels]

Dealing with existing relationships. It drives me nuts when, for example, my sister throws a party and there are 2 or 3 good-looking girls I'd LOVE to boink, and I'd LOVE to run game on them, but they ALL have boyfriends!

Once you hit that age, all the girls's friends have boyfriends, so they all have to be dating SOMEONE or they can't hang out with their non-single friends any more.

And I know that boundary can be utterly disrespected. I have before in the past. But with people you KNOW, that can backfire on you real quick. I feel like I'm literally biting my tongue and stuffing my hands in my pockets just to avoid taking a shot at a "taken" girl.

And the thing is, these girls...they really want to get around, but THEY'RE bound into respecting an existing relationship. They get into it just to have company and for social reasons, but then end up having to respect that relationship as if it WAS a romance. I KNOW that at least SOME of these girls would rather be with me...but to break up with someone for someone else is the HEIGHT of impropriety for them.

Fvck...to just find some people who aren't bound to bullsh!t relationships by society. Hell, I can't even go to the bar any more without running into girls who are married/engaged/have boyfriends. WTF are you doing out in a place like THIS if you're not SINGLE? If I had someone I was steady with, I would be doing all KINDS of fun things with them...there are SO many opportunities in that lifestyle and here you are out getting drunk in some slutty outfit getting hit on by guys you don't even WANT??

Heh...just venting. This BS needs to stop.

 

[FM 3321]

I seriously think there are more single women out there than taken ones. Plus if you have your game (inner and outer) game tight those taken girls will figure out you'll be more fun than the fvcking chump they're dating. Sometimes on MySpace I'll just randomly look around at the relationship status of women I find beautiful and the majority of them are single saying how hard it is to find a quality man. The women that every wants have the most trouble finding a man that wets their crotches in my opinion. Don't give up.

 

[Bonhomme]

Yeah, as one gets into the late 20s and beyond, the percentage of quality women who are available definitely goes down. It may increase a bit later, as more get divorced and decide they don't want to get married again.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Dealing with existing relationships. It drives me nuts when, for example, my sister throws a party and there are 2 or 3 good-looking girls I'd LOVE to boink, and I'd LOVE to run game on them, but they ALL have boyfriends!

No offence but you still have a lot to learn about women, especially single women. Take your example, very few single women will go to parties where they are known without a date, it's their own type of social proof. You will find few of the "bangable" single ones there unless they don't mind being constantly pointed out as either being not able to get/keep a boyfriend or just sleeps around. Next time your sister throws a party, ask her if she knows of any of her single friends who would like to come and hang out with you.

 

[comote]

If you really feel that all the women your age are taken then here is an idea . . . you ready . . . it's pretty radical . . . DATE YOUNGER WOMEN. The prime age for the women I start to date is mid 20's 23-26. It will stay that way everytime I find myself single again.

 

[Bonhomme]

No offence but you still have a lot to learn about women, especially single women. Take your example, very few single women will go to parties where they are known without a date, it's their own type of social proof...

Yup. They're almost always with a date or at least a group of friends.

Women swing from one boyfriend to the next. As one relationship ends they have already lined up another guy to be the next.

Very true ... if they are the type who tends to almost always be in a relationship. There are also people who are very, very picky, and are often single for long stretches. Chances are you're "not good enough" for them (almost nobody is). Not as many of those. People tend to fall in one or the other category.

If you really feel that all the women your age are taken then here is an idea . . . you ready . . . it's pretty radical . . . DATE YOUNGER WOMEN. The prime age for the women I start to date is mid 20's 23-26. It will stay that way everytime I find myself single again.

I doubt that will work when you get to the point you obviously look like you could be their dad. But if you can pass for 30ish or younger, that's likely to be what the numbers dictate will be your main dating pool ... unless you have passably good looks and writing skills, a very good "resume", and do the online thing (which is very age-centric).

 

[Bonhomme]

Actually, the hardest thing I've found about dating (chasing women is bad semantics to use, even as a mere figure of speech) as one gets older is simply dealing with the age issue. Very often there are women who are quite attracted, but just can't get past that, even if you don't look very much older than them.

 

[STR8UP]

Actually, the hardest thing I've found about dating (chasing women is bad semantics to use, even as a mere figure of speech) as one gets older is simply dealing with the age issue. Very often there are women who are quite attracted, but just can't get past that, even if you don't look very much older than them.

Never had that problem.

Might have something to do with the fact that I flip it around on them and make it seem like their young age could be an issue for ME.

Plus it helps that I look younger, like you said. Last night this 26 yr old told me that when she met me she thought I was 21-22.

HOLY FREAKIN SH1T, I'm 35 MAN! Even had to show her my DL to prove it. I usually get mistaken for being younger, but that's extreme. I'll take the compliment.

 

[STR8UP]

I doubt that will work when you get to the point you obviously look like you could be their dad. But if you can pass for 30ish or younger, that's likely to be what the numbers dictate will be your main dating pool ... unless you have passably good looks and writing skills, a very good "resume", and do the online thing (which is very age-centric).

That really depends upon a LOT of factors.

Hef is what? 103? And he has THREE girlfriends at any point on time. That guy is AWESOME.

Looks, money and status trump lots of social conventions, remember that.

 

[Bonhomme]

I flip it around on them and make it seem like their young age could be an issue for ME.

That's a very good thing to do and mindset to have.

Still, women tend to be less likely to act based on attraction alone. Unless you're seen as disposable. Being perceived as having too much quality can actually be a negative for FB/fling purposes.

 

[Bonhomme]

What I'm saying applies to everyday people who don't have GQ looks, fame, or enormous riches. One who has any of those things (unless, perhaps, they have the fame and/or money, but are really ass ugly) would be a really sad case to have any problem getting women. But quality women, that's a whole 'nother matter...

 

[joekerr31]

i find the hardest thing about women as they get older is not them, but rather me - my standards get higher every year. haha. probably a function of me continuing to build a quality life for myself. im getting better and better as i get older, and i find my standards rise as a result.

but as to quality women etc. i think there are low quality women at all ages. there are probably the highest amount of high quality females at 16 in the sense that they haven't been perverted by the world. At 16 i bet probably 40% of females have an idealistic caring nature (btw, i AM NOT espousing older guys get with 16 year olds).

but by 18 or so id argue that the 40% drops to 10% of women.

yes, later in life (say in the 40s) that number might go up to 30-40 % high quality as women get divorced, go through therapy, and learn how to be quality human beings.

as for there not being a ton of single women out there, i think thats not true. at the end of the day there are an equal number of men and women in north america.

now i suppose you could argue that a lot of men are double dipping. ie. they get married, get divorced, grab another woman while their ex stays single (ie. spends all her time raising the kids). as a result you have older divorced men throw back in to the pool of 'single men' while the 'available single women' pool doesn't increase. personally though i think the impacts of all that are nominal. And you can EASILY offset this phenomena by arguing that the prisons are FILLED with men who are pulled OUT of the pool. hehe.

so, why is it that it seems as though there are less single women than men out there. I'll tell ya what it is...

1) there are lots of single women who aren't looking for a man. these women can be hot but they typically aren't flirtatious, they dont draw excessive attention to themselves, and are quiet and understated in their daily lives. as a result YOU DONT NOTICE THEM! More over, they aren't at the bars and partying it up. they are probably like most guys here and have a very basic routine of going to work, comign home, and watching tv.
2) there are tons of flirty women who YOU DO NOTICE. they suck you in, get you all interested in them, you then make your move and BAM they are taken. this happens 10 times in a row and you then start to think "damn, all the women are taken". the only reason this seems to be the case is that you are getting played by attention wh*res.
3) Depending on how unique you are as an individual you might find it hard to find 'compatible' single women. while this occurs you simultaneously look at single women in relationships and think 'man why is she taken'. but truth is, if she WERE single you probably wouldn't be anywhere near as interested in her! put differently, you may also be consciously focusing on the lack of available women as a way to mask a subconscious lack of desire to be in a relationship. there are lots of guys who go on and on about wanting a woman, but if you were take them out and go 'ok, how about her? or her, or that one. or this one." they'd come back at you with 'hmmm. naw, too tall, too short, too prissy, probably has big vagina lips, etc." - they THINk there are no single women without realizing that they are subconsciously ignoring them.


anyway, one of the big factors in all this is that people who are in a relationship are much more noticeable in life than those who aren't. the reason behind this is that they have a constant source of positive validation from their 'other' and as a result are confident and tend to be high energy.

while single people tend to be more reserved and less energetic as they struggle through life on their own. hehe. (i tend to be an excpetion to this rule. i find relationships sap my energy. when im single i feel on top of the world. when i've got a chic around now my energy, time, etc. are being sapped)

or to use a different analogy. single women often walk aroudn as though they are wearing 3 winter sweaters. while taken women bounce around as though they weren't wearing a shirt. which one is going to catch your attention!

a lot of single guys, like single women, are looking for a quick score - someone to lift their sails. other single people usually have a bit of a black cloud hanging over them and go unnoticed.

and remember. women have low self esteem. SINGLE women have UNBELIEVABLY low self esteem. they are like chameleons and often will meld into the background to AVOID attention.

if any guy opens his eyes to the world around him he'll find TONS of single women that he wasn't even notice before.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

i find the hardest thing about women as they get older is not them, but rather me - my standards get higher every year. haha. probably a function of me continuing to build a quality life for myself. im getting better and better as i get older, and i find my standards rise as a result.

Welcome to the club.

 

[docv]

i find the hardest thing about dating as i get older is the fact that i have so much money. when i was young and poor and in a relationship or meeting girls it was about nothing more then the time we spent together.

now that i have money $hit is compicated. you get to thinking if the girl really likes you for who you are or what you are and how much money you have.

its kinda lame but thats just how it goes. i guess it would make sense to meet a chic who has a great career who already has money.. but that limits my spectrum of datable chics by huge proportions.

 

[STR8UP]

That's a very good thing to do and mindset to have.

I'm telling you, it works SO good, I should patent it

It works especially well when there's a big age difference. Tell a 21ish chick that she's "just a baby" and she'll be tripping over herself to prove that she's a grownup.

 

[STR8UP]

i find the hardest thing about women as they get older is not them, but rather me - my standards get higher every year. haha. probably a function of me continuing to build a quality life for myself. im getting better and better as i get older, and i find my standards rise as a result.

That pretty much sums it up!

It's amazing the transformation that takes place as you start to realize that YOU are a hot commodity. You become more selective, the women take notice and the whole thing feeds on itself.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

i find the hardest thing about dating as i get older is the fact that i have so much money. when i was young and poor and in a relationship or meeting girls it was about nothing more then the time we spent together.

now that i have money $hit is compicated. you get to thinking if the girl really likes you for who you are or what you are and how much money you have.

its kinda lame but thats just how it goes. i guess it would make sense to meet a chic who has a great career who already has money.. but that limits my spectrum of datable chics by huge proportions.

It makes it hard when the inevitable opener for most women is "So, what do you do?" I just tell them what I do in my spare time. If they try to redirect the conversation to my career it just throws up a huge red flag for me.

I had a similar thing with a woman who was amped up on education. She had a BS and was working on her MS and was ragging on whether I had a bachelors or not. I tried to steer clear of the subject since I had a bit more education that her and didn't want to create a sense of competition.

Alas she cared so much about that piece of paper that we never hooked up. About a year later I ran into her at before a lecture and she was surprised to see me there; at least she realized that I had approximately as much education as she did (or she thought). The look on her face was priceless when they introduced me a the lecturer for the evening. Needless to say she tried to reconnect afterward but I told her that I was following her lead in that I was looking for someone with a certain level of education.

Sometimes you have to wonder if some women truly know what's good for them. Eh, so the saga continues....

 

[squirrels]

Nice, F d'A!

 

[Bonhomme]

you get to thinking if the girl really likes you for who you are or what you are and how much money you have.

Thing is, they don't like you for who you are.

Try this experiment: put up an online profile with an average or above average (but not super hot male model) pic listing an income below 50K with a congruent career and just see how much action you get with it. It's enough to make you think good 'ol Puerto_Rican_Lover was right on about all women being "hors".

 

[Rudra]

Thing is, they don't like you for who you are.

Try this experiment: put up an online profile with an average or above average (but not super hot male model) pic listing an income below 50K with a congruent career and just see how much action you get with it. It's enough to make you think good 'ol Puerto_Rican_Lover was right on about all women being "hors".

Bonhomme, didnt get your point, explain plz. Average or above average pic plus good income (50k would be almost two times the average income in the US). You will have broads all over you.. whats the point? You could make a point by posting a bUtt ugly pic and a real good income... or didnt I get you?