You guys have a set rule for how many times you try and contact a girl?

[Kal0051]

I ask cause there's one girl I want to ask out. She just got out of a relationship (her bf ended it) and right before that we made some quick plans to hang out (didn't nail down a day and time because neither of us knew our schedules). I called her a few days after that to see when she was free and she didn't answer. Tried to talk to her on facebook a couple days later and nothing.

I'm on facebook about a week after I called her, see her on and say hi (I usually say hi to random people on facebook). She answers this time, says she's sorry about not talking to me and tells me her bf ended it. We send a couple messages back and forth and say bye (I don't mention us hanging out).

Couple days ago I see her. We talk for a minute and she tells me she was on a date (she's been single for bout a week and a half). I don't say much, we end the convo and I said I'll call her. I call her today, no answer. I leave a message saying that I wanted to hang out with her and to call me back.

Now, I don't know if she'll call me back and I would like to try her again but I don't want to look too clingy. Should I even bother calling her back?

Oh, and a slightly unrelated matter, have you guys ever had a girl call you late at night (say like 4 am) and then not answer your calls when you call her later to see what's up. A girl I know did that to me this past weekend and I don't know what's up (something must have been up for her to call me that late but she didn't leave a message).

 

[Sofomore]

Cool it down with her. Right now is NOT the time to rush things. She is pretty overwhelmed with things probably. You should not have left a message giving away your interest in her.

Cool it for a week or so. Let her contact you.

I usually just pay attention to how much i have contacted her, and space it out to a reasonable time. Remember- you are a busy guy. Right?

 

[(JJ)]

on your slightly unrelated matter, i think she was drunk. pretty simple. although, it's weird she didnt answer when you called her the next day.

she must have looked at a picture of you with beer goggles on

 

[muscleman]

4am call = drunk dial or extremely psychotic, neither of which should be taken seriously.

I second Sofomore's comment. Typically I'd say next, but it's possible she's got the whole slowly-breaking-up thing going with her bf, which is relatively poor timing for other dating opportunities. Give it a week, text her or catch her online or something, and see if she wants to get together. If you call and she doesn't pick up, don't leave a voicemail - let her call you back. Voicemails are for business purposes and emergencies.

If yes, set up a time/day then and there.

If no, forget about her.

 

[Kal0051]

yeah, got a hold of the 4am girl, alcohol was involved with her call (not surprising with her actually).

As for the other one, haven't tried to contact her yet. I'd like to tomorrow or the next day, this that too soon?

 

[slaog]

You should not be contacting her repeatedly. She admitting she ignored you. Also the other date was her priority over you. She didn't answer you because she knows you like her and she either doesn't like you or is still confused.


Don't get your hopes up I'd say.

 

[Dante420]

Damn straight, it's all about you and what makes you comfortable. Never sound like your going out of your way in some planned manner

 

[King_Supreme]

u listen to jay z? his new album has a song called "on to the next one". thats my new motto for these chicks. if she dont wanna fvck wit u "on 2 the next 1", she wont call u back "on 2 the next 1", if shes not interested then "on 2 the next one".

 

[King_Supreme]

ohh but to answer ur question, i try to contact somebody twice and thats it. its not brain surgery. 1st time is a phone call, i dont leave messages. 2nd time may be phone call or text it depends.

 

[Nutz]

2 Strikes Rule:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=154043

 

[DonJuan11]

There's one girl I want to ask out:

- I called her and she didn't answer.
- Tried to talk to her on facebook and nothing.
- I call her today, I leave a message saying that I wanted to hang out with her and to call me back.
- Should I even bother calling her back? I don't want to look too clingy

I think that ship has sailed.

"Hello Jennifer? Listen, I WANT to hang out with you so CALL ME BACK RIGHT NOW. Bye."

Dude you got to learn how to put the charm on and learn how and what turns them on.

 

[the_professional]

The call at 4 AM is definitely a drunk dial. When I was out drinking last week, I actually accidentally called two people (my phone is touchscreen) without realizing.

 

[Kal0051]

That's it, I deleted her number. And that makes 5 girls I've failed with in the past week alone. Maybe next week I'll go for 10 girls to fail with (sarcasm). But if there's any upside, it's that it no longer hurts to be constantly rejected seeing as I just come to expect it. Fvck

 

[slaog]

You're just having a bad week but at least you are contacting females and learning from your experiances. I've had some shocking experiances but I'm glad now because I learned the lessons.

 

[Kal0051]

You're just having a bad week but at least you are contacting females and learning from your experiances. I've had some shocking experiances but I'm glad now because I learned the lessons.

I'm having more than a bad week. It's more like a bad year. For the last year I've had very little success with women, starting with a girl I had oneitis for.

 

[Energizer]

I'm having more than a bad week. It's more like a bad year. For the last year I've had very little success with women, starting with a girl I had oneitis for.

If it makes you feel any better I haven't had much success with women for about a year. Keep your chin up and keep battling away, you'll get there.

 

[Kal0051]

If it makes you feel any better I haven't had much success with women for about a year. Keep your chin up and keep battling away, you'll get there.

still ridiculous, why is it so difficult to get women to go out with me and have some fun. I'm not even talking bout sex (don't really care all that much about sex), I prefer just chilling with a girl and have some fun. But it's been about a year since that last happened (this was the oneitis girl).

 

[Energizer]

Quite clearly you have suffer from a distinct lack of social skills, it's so easy to hang out with women. Just get familiar with girl through brief conversations and then ask her if she fancies hanging out sometime. It's easy mate.

You also come aross as a Debbie Downer who has low self-esteem and who gains comfort from asking people "what's wrong with me?". In truth there is nothing wrong with you, you just have low self-esteem and seem to be your harshest critic. Lighten up, smile more, be more confident, learn to like yourself and you ought to be on your way. Keep plugging away and no matter how much rejection remain persistent. Persistence is key, do not allow a woman top control your emotions and determine yourself self worth. When you allow women to batter your confidence and self-esteem, you do yourself a grave disservice.

 

[909pua]

Oh, and a slightly unrelated matter, have you guys ever had a girl call you late at night (say like 4 am) and then not answer your calls when you call her later to see what's up. A girl I know did that to me this past weekend and I don't know what's up (something must have been up for her to call me that late but she didn't leave a message).

Most likely, this girl went thru some problems with a boyfriend at around that time and she went thru an emotional state and decided to call you. since you didn't call, her emotional state got fixed and she didn't need you anymore, thats why she didnt return your calls.

Girls are weird creatures. I'm dealing with one right now and she's putting me in a loop. Fvked her on Monday night before I left then we talked on Wednesday and she offered to pick me up in the airport on Friday (which was last night). But during the conversation, she said she'd call back. She never did and I wasn't gonna call her to remind her to pick me up. So in the end, she never called nor did I. I just got a ride home from my friend instead. Things like this, you can't let get to you, so that's why many in here are advising for you to spin more plates so you don't go nuts on one.

 

[Alle_Gory]

Q: You guys have a set rule for how many times you try and contact a girl?

A: No. Because its different for every girl.