Originally posted by TommyD:
Personally, I've tried the total 'nice guy' approach. I've tried it for about 22+ years of my life. I've been in one really serious relationship... until she cheated on me.
Then you shouldn't stop, there is nothing wrong with being nice, but there is a problem with being oblivious to the things around you.
Originally posted by TommyD:
That is why the DJ approach is so valuable to me... I can decipher whether or not a woman is interested enough in me in order for me to invest my time in her. Before if I'd ask a woman out, and she'd give me the run-around, I wouldn't quit. I'd still try to work her. Now I know not to bother. If I 'ask' a woman for her number, and she instead asks me for mine... I know to forget her asap.
The problem is that the "AD" approach is based on nothing more than generalizations. Now can you really say that 4 billion people on this planet act and react in the exact same way?! You could find a woman that asks for you number that is quite interested in you, and what will you do, leave her.
Originally posted by TommyD:
And for the record, I won't give flowers just for the sake of giving flowers. Women learn to take that kind of thing for granted. I used to give my ex flowers every time we went out... and I'd take her places like the theatre (not the movies, I mean the real theatre: like professional plays), all the time. I'd pick her up in the morning before school, carry her books, buy her lunch, dinner... make her breakfast... not every day mind you, but you'd think she'd appreciate that wouldn't you?
No, no i wouldn't because you were obviously smothering her. It's like running around saying "I LOVE YOU" to everyone you meet, eventually the words loose their meaning, and in your case all the romantic things that you tried to do lost mean and lost appreciation. The key is knowing when to draw the line between romance and excess.
Originally posted by TommyD:
Well, she likes not being treated like I treated her. I got old... my niceness got old. This new guy is not so nice... he stands up for himself, he doesn't do the things I did for her... and she is now engaged to him.
Being nice and being a push-over are two entirely different things, I've said that repeatedly. Your niceness didn't get old, your obsessing got old. Your lack of balls got old, and that's why she left.
NEXT…
Originally posted by Ross Jeffries:
But, if YOU start fighting dirty, I will feel under no moral obligation whatsoever to continue to stand there like a fool and take it. I'm going to toss out all the rules and fight to win, no matter what it takes.
Dating isn’t a fistfight; there are no broken bones, just broken egos. The eye for an eye technique never works, and it never will. By participating in vengeance all your really doing is sinking yourself to her level, and why would you want to do that. If someone is pulling sh1t then leave, don’t seek revenge because it truly is a double bladed sword.
Originally posted by Ross Jeffries:
For example, lots of women are more than happy to spend your money and time, and generally lead you on, letting you think you have a reward (sexual) coming. They talk about sex on the date, touch you a lot, and ACT very seductive. Then when you make a pass, they freak out and scream about what animals men are, how we're only after one thing.
I’m sorry but if you can’t see through women who play games, your either dead or in a coma. If you were to step back and analyze your relationship without the use of your smaller head you’d probably see it before you get used and abused. I have very little sympathy for guys who get led on by sex, if your main purpose in the dating scene is to have fun, rather than get laid then it’s very hard to get used. I don’t like players, and I never will.
Originally posted by Ross Jeffries:
And while we're on the subject of fair, is it "fair" that the good-looking and rich guys should get all the beautiful women while you and I have to settle for the dogs? Are you any less deserving of complete sexual satisfaction than some pretty boy who was blessed by genetics and Daddy's bank account?
YOU ARE MEN!! You decide who gets to go out with you, and if you choose gold diggers and tramps then you will get the treatment you deserve especially if all you want is sexual satisfaction.
Originally posted by Ross Jeffries:
Now, you may decide, the heck with it. If you can't at least like and respect a lady, and if you have to resort to tactics you learned in a book, then it just isn't worth it, and you will skip dealing with such loser females altogether.
That’s the most intelligent thing he said, and that is what it’s all about.
NEXT…
Originally posted by Ko-B:
that's the whole point. the DJ/AD/Marauder approach lets you know straight up if the woman likes you or not. Whether she's worth spending/wasting your time with.
It also disconnects you emotionally from her, that is the evil of the system which also kills it in relationship situations.
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Devlar
Remember its hard to be a gentileman, but that doesn't mean it's not fun
