You All Need To Read This Quote

[*29*]

You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him find it within himself ~ Galileo

So you mean I won't get better just by reading post after post?!

That I won't gain confidence, alphaness, humor, just by reading about it?

So everything I ever wanted to be is inside me?

Yup

All the posts you've read are only reminding you of what you have forgotten.

You've had the abilities all along.

You just forgot they were there.

Once again, these posts will only point you in the right direction.

It is YOU who must take that leap towards embracing your manhood.

It all starts with overcoming that fear.

Just ignore negative thoughts. And without thinking about it say:

"Hey"

to that hot as$ girl you've been afraid to even make eye contact with.

If you think you'll look like a dumbas$ saying it, you will be.
If you think you'll be prince charming, you will be.

Why? Because it's inside you.

It's your choice, Mr. Man.

 

[diablo]

Using that chain of logic, why am I even bothering with college? More specifically, why don't I take the final examinations for every class, since I already know everything anyway... after all, the teacher is only reminding me of what I've forgotten - especially in graduate-level courses like "Abstract Algebra and Number Theory"... even though I'm struggling through Introductory Algebra...

Some of what you say has merit though - if you don't approach anyone, and instead sit here day after day doing nothing but theorizing and not testing anything out then you're not going to get anywhere... however, I believe that reading things such as the DJB will help out far more than they'll hurt - if you've been picking up girls with no problem all your life then how is it you came across this site? Obviously you wanted to change something about yourself, thus it stands to reason that the way you're doing things now isn't working as well for you as you'd like. It doesn't make sense to not use the tools at hand that can help you accomplish your objectives...

 

[Virtú]

Nothing on this forum will make you want to improve yourself.

Nothing on this forum will make you want to approach women.

Nothing on this forum will make you want to be more of a man.

Only you can make yourself want to do something ... and in the end you'll still have to force yourself to do it until you get good at it.

If you spend hours a day sitting in front of your computer, reading and rereading posts, waiting for the informating to sink in and change you ... then you're wasting your time.

In all likelihood, this forum has become an exercise in fantasy for you, a variety of Internet addiction. Coming here and reading and posting has become a substitute for life, giving you the same satisfaction that you would get from living life or approaching women, filling the void that exists because you don't do those things.

If this is true for you ... then take what you've learned here and don't come back.

 

[*29*]

Originally posted by diablo:
Using that chain of logic, why am I even bothering with college? More specifically, why don't I take the final examinations for every class, since I already know everything anyway... after all, the teacher is only reminding me of what I've forgotten - especially in graduate-level courses like "Abstract Algebra and Number Theory"... even though I'm struggling through Introductory Algebra...

Well Mister Diablo, I'm talking about natural things.
How do babies know how to walk? Nobody taught them, they didn't go to a seminar about how to walk. They know it by instinct.

Why can't that be true for us men to act like men?

 

[Asesino]

Everything you read here, learned here will all depend on you yourself. If you don't apply it in real life, it'll be completely useless. Practicing what you read here will be the main thing. Just practice it and see what you'll get. If you do them the right way, then you'll know it's really working.

 

[dearsappho]

With the greatest respect, I dont believe your initial assumption 29...this forum has given me information that I never even thought would work before I came here.

I used to think that logic ruled the day; that if you do stuff for girls then they will reward you with their attention etc.
I now know from this site that the romatic ideal is a myth. If this information was inside me all the long how come this site has (and perhaps continues) to provide me with valuable insight?

There is no innate method to all this. Change comes from within? I doubt it...change comes from discussion with those who possess what you want to attain.

The human mind comprises of an endless string of references (much like a books bibliography - Hell! you even referenced in your opening Quote!) based on experience. That is how we make sense of the world. These references can be altered or discarded, however, depending on context that is external (Jacques Derrida- Of Grammatology).

Thats the beauty of sites like this. They allow you to change.

If all we needed to know was inside us I wouldnt be here and neither would you; and that would be the ultimate tragedy, wouldnt it?

 

[A-Unit]

Reframe.

I liken much of what's in existence in our world to uncovering treasures.

The knowledge of how to build pyramids, find gold, drill for oil, conduct surgery, fly a plane is all OUT THERE. It takes determination and belief to uncover it. Think of it as a paleontologist who is brushing away years of sand and debris to cover bones that have always existed there, just feet beneath the soil. The same applies to life....


Principles exist that flow through our universe. Each and every moment of time exists someone "putting the pieces" together in a puzzle they have found to create something from existing pieces. However, the sum total of those pieces is more powerful than the individual. In fact, the pieces have no existence without the total.


In the example of a body, is a heart a heart w/out a body, and a brain to regulate it, blood to be pumped through it, and skin and bone to enclose it? I think not. It is just another muscle. It's purpose is only in existence so long as it is part of the total system. It has no useful value apart from the total.


Look at Gates, Buffet, Soros, musicians, actors, doctors, businessman...etc. They see pieces available in society, they seey a need or a want, or a lack, and they see the potential of it, coral the resources and generate some benefit from it. Could we have done the same? Quite possibly. It would have taken longer, and there's an element missing, the spiritual element that drives a person to do what it is they do. All the talent in the world exists in everyone, yet most people dwell on the negative and subvert their spirits, their thinking, and their potential. When you're thinking negative, or pessimistic, you can't be thinking solution, or fun, or results, or how-to.


This applies to women. When you're wasting time on her liking you, on what you look like, you're losing time to creative thinking.


I've heard the statement that:

Confidence is not something built-up, it's in fact, the removal of barriers between you and your goals and between you and true self.

That's a more 'logical explanation' to me, than BUILDING oneself up. Why? Because we were all born pretty happy, pretty care-free, talented and so forth. If you're "thinking" on confidence is to be built up, then at what point are you BUILT-UP enough to approach women? To open a business? To do public speaking? To invest without fear of loss? To accomplish all goals you desire?

When you're removing "road-blocks", all it takes is the removal of a few key points to send all the marbles falling in your favor. Think of it like this....

You want to meet girls you like. You're sick and tired of wishy, washy flakes. So what must you do?

*Become a person of internal value and worth to yourself.
*Be a man who is attractive to himself, and to others.
*Enjoy your life.
*Develop the skills of successful living, and all that you desire will come to you as a byproduct.

From there, you outline the specific steps for you to succeed. RATHER than continuously pursuing mystical means, or endless posts on SoSuave. THIS is why many guys never get out there. They're trying to build motivation and confidence up, RATHER than remove barriers to themselves and their goal.

That's like a lifter trying to get big. A lifter with bigorexia will continue to lift BECAUSE HE ALWAYS SEE HIMSELF SMALL, even when the tape measures says differently. Many guys here are like that. Even when you have some talents, some social proof you seek perfection which does not exist, RATHER than seeking some sort of MASTERY over oneself.

Since we can't control the environment we live in, we must control those elements of ourselves WE CAN CONTROL. We can't control an economy, so we must take steps to protect our finances. We can't control who hits our car, so we must insure it. We can't control what infections we get, so we must exercise and eat healthy. We can't control what diseases a girl has, so we must use protection and choose wisely.


What 29 said is what many hippie-spiritual-yoga-types believe in, getting back to the child-state where the EGO (or the alternative thinking you) did not exist. I believe we were all the same at one point, too. Early on in life, we were introduced to many different modes of thinking. "Shark" renowned speaker and friend of "Badboy" found on www.playboylifestyle.net says...


The alphas are condoned to act as they do because society allows them to. Case-in-point...the athlete, the class clown, the beauty queen; if you fill this 'niche' during grade school, people coddle you in certain ways to 'expect' certain things of you. If you're the team QB, even if you're a pvssy underneath, you have social proof that you've accomplished SOMETHING or COULD do something. At an age when you have no reputation, society imposes one on you based on your skill set, and it almost seems as if they try to predict your future before you've had a chance to dream and plan. Many guys let this happen. If they're not alpha athlete, or the leader of a pack, or the class clown, or the rich guy, they loathe them and make excuses. Such thinking is not true.

Al Bundy comes to mind. Many of my high school peers comes to mind, as they're not fat-wasters who frequent Irish Pubs. So does society and social proof help the child? Not particularly. You fill a role, and when you deviate from that role, society has problems. This bleeds into self-image, which basically means you'll act as how you've always seen yourself. If you envision yourself as "not good looking, not stylish, intelligent, but quiet," changing your thinking of WHO you really are means feeling the spirit within. The inner you, seeking to creep out. This isn't about alpha or beta, or omega, or gama, it's about you, and a higher level of thinking. If you're talking in greek levels of masculinity, you're still operating in the animal kingdom, and you have loads of competitors. Put yourself on another plane of thinking and now you have none.



So 29, good insight. And great quote. We're trying UNLOCK what's inside, RATHER THAN, BUILD UP what you are. Much of those who've invented and given to society only used what they had within them and the elements of the world to work with.




A-Unit

 

[Maverick_DJ]

Its like I say 'Even the wisest man can only show you the door, only you have the power to take yourself through it'. Kind of ripped it from the matrix but its true nonetheless!

 

[Virtú]

Originally posted by *29*
Well Mister Diablo, I'm talking about natural things.
How do babies know how to walk? Nobody taught them, they didn't go to a seminar about how to walk. They know it by instinct.

Why can't that be true for us men to act like men?

It can be true.
I'm certain that what you describe will be what happens to me eventually.

The problem is that we here are so ego-ized, so out of touch with our instincts, that describing an egoless, purely instinctive state to us is like describing light to a blind man ... it is beyond comprehension.

Which is probably just as well since comprehending involves (and therefore strengthens) the ego.

I remember a passage from a book on Zen that I read once: “Zen spirituality is not to contemplate God while peeling potatoes; Zen spirituality is to just peel the potatoes.”

There should be no thought involved in this, no feelings either (beyond those triggered by the doing), only pure action. It’s your balls, your masculine instincts, that should be making you hit on women, not your brain or your heart. And it is those same masculine instincts that would drive you still further; ambition, will-to-power, etc.

Unfortunately, those instincts are so weakened, buried under 5,000 years of civilization and 50 years of feminism, that, try as we might, we cannot hear them. Therefore,something has to happen in order for our instincts to become strong enough to direct our attitude and behavior.

Originally posted by A-Unit
Confidence is not something built-up, it's in fact, the removal of barriers between you and your goals and between you and true self.

That's a more 'logical explanation' to me, than BUILDING oneself up. Why? Because we were all born pretty happy, pretty care-free, talented and so forth. If you're "thinking" on confidence is to be built up, then at what point are you BUILT-UP enough to approach women? To open a business? To do public speaking? To invest without fear of loss? To accomplish all goals you desire?

When you're removing "road-blocks", all it takes is the removal of a few key points to send all the marbles falling in your favor. Think of it like this....

You want to meet girls you like. You're sick and tired of wishy, washy flakes. So what must you do?

*Become a person of internal value and worth to yourself.
*Be a man who is attractive to himself, and to others.
*Enjoy your life.
*Develop the skills of successful living, and all that you desire will come to you as a byproduct.

To be honest, I’m starting to believe that there’s an extra step involved.
EVERYONE says the above … “Do/be these things and women will be all over you.”
Of course, as anyone can see, nothing happens, and more posts about “What the Hell am I supposed to do to get _________?” continue. Why? Because despite what *29*, A-Unit, and obviously Pook, say, the listed behaviors (along with sexuality, dominance, etc.) are anything but natural to the ego-slaves on this forum.

I’m starting to believe that removing the internal roadblocks, that discovering the true self (the buried masculine instincts), must come before self-improvement, since otherwise the self-improvement will only be more ego, drawing you further away from your instincts.
Just as the military must break you (your ego) down in order to build you up into a soldier, you must first destroy the ego and re-establish the rule of instinct … which will compel you to improve yourself more potently than anything else.

Balls manufacturing testosterone is enough for every [non-human] male on this planet ... so why isn't it enough for us?

The answer is ego, the consciousness that only human males possess, which, over the course of development, gradually takes over from instinct.
Relax, since you're human, you'll still know things, you'll still be able to think and solve problems, you'll still be able to feel emotions, and you'll still be able to distinguish between right and wrong ... so you have nothing to lose by embracing instinct.

Ego is meant to be your safety valve, to keep instinct from reaching the point of diminishing returns, not the engine that powers and drives you ... only instinct, only testosterone alone, can do that.

[Excessive] self-consciousness is one of the definitions of insanity.

 

[squirrels]

True enough. Men have been getting laid since before they could think.

 

[*29*]

Orignially posted by dearsappho

Change comes from within? I doubt it...change comes from discussion with those who possess what you want to attain.

Yes, change does come from within. When you were an AFC and started hanging with DJ's, you didn't change at all just by having conversation with them.

No.

You looked in the mirror and saw yourself, probably for the first time in a long time. You were insecure, needy, and scared. No amount of clothes, sunglasses, or cologne was going to change you.

You were unhappy. So you vowed to change yourself.

The only way to do so was to change from within.

"NO. I will not supplicate to women."
"NO. I will not fear women."
"YES. I will make eye contact with women."
"YES. I will be a Man."

If all we needed to know was inside us I wouldnt be here and neither would you; and that would be the ultimate tragedy, wouldnt it?

Let's think about this. I remember someone saying this, but I don't remember who.

Did you think Adam needed advice when it came to Eve?
Nope.

Today's society has flooded our minds with wussy filled ideas. No wonder we have trouble being the men we're supposed to be. We haven't lost it, it's just underneath piles of shlt called wussiness.

 

[Virtú]

Originally posted by *29*
Today's society has flooded our minds with wussy filled ideas. No wonder we have trouble being the men we're supposed to be. We haven't lost it, it's just underneath piles of shlt called wussiness.

How and where do I start digging?

 

[A-Unit]

Re:

How and where do I start digging?

**Question everything.**

To escape the societal matrix of programmed crap, realize what programs are running and if they fit your goals and life.

From there, build beliefs that support your goals, wants, and desires.

For instance, many guys completely the notion of being wildly successful in business, as much or more so than Trump, and by and large, never even amount to what they dream. If you're not doing what you dream and persuing what you dream, then what are you doing?

Perhaps it'd piss people off more to be so inquisitive, but when you prod people, you find alot of non-belief stuff running. For example, I heard ALOT of junk about going into various businesses from my parents, mostly because they had a family business that was sold out from under them. They felt it was too risky to be independent. Isn't it risky to NOT be independent? TO have someone else in control of you?

You have to...


1.See the a program exists stopping you.
2. Break it.
3. Build new ones that support your goals.


When I was younger, I could always be very social with any group I new reasonably well, and take over the whole scene. But when it came to public interaction with people I didn't know, it was difficult to 'trigger' it unless I was in the right state of mind. Realizing it was no different, I saw what was going on [recognized], figured out what I did want [realization], and made the plan w/beliefs to do it [actualization and implementation].


Generating new beliefs requires the flooding of constant and new ideas. From, CD's, to affirmations, to hypnosis, to sleep cd's, to NLP, to friends, to journals, to support groups, to motivation, inspiration, and belief, it can be done. If you weren't raised in the environment conducive to your goals, create it now.


I remember an E Book I read on the impact of environment. It was about generating success, and part of what enables a person to rise and fall is about what they surround themselves with. If you have the most update to date home, plush with porn mags, and booze, you'll yield 1 result. If you have a library, internet access, and healthy food, you'll yield another. When the temptations are not before you, you can create new habits. Part of this is knowing that these habits can be created, and that everything is a 'habit' and a 'program' and a 'way of thinking' that you formulated overtime as your REALITY.


People form habits, habits form people.

You can consciously create the desired habits that produce the desired results. THEN, you will assimilate these habits into who you are.

For a better body and healthy lifestyle...

*Have nutritional literature, cookbooks, weight scales, fat testers, food scales, and diet logs around.
*Find out where the local stores that carry healthy foods are.
*Write down a regular list of healthy food that you can buy when you're out.
*Find a gym, and create some awesome workout tapes.
*Envision the body you desire in your mind and what interactions you'll experience as a result of it.
*Set a large goal to enjoy it, such as going to Spring Break, or a pool party with lots of girls.
*Envision the clothes you want and how they'll look on you.
*Imagine how you'll feel when you get THERE.
*Set a routine of regular eating and workout routines.
*Prevent yourself from accumulating to much 'lethargic crap' that will detract from that all-important goal.
*Set a reward for achieving your goal.
*Measure your progress, and critique as needed.

You see...just outlining these steps for the majority of people who are looking for direction is the 'physical form of it'. If you followed these steps, adapt them to your own, and execute a plan based on your goals, success is guaranteed. But, most get wrapped up in the details, such as "what type of plan, what clothes, dumbbells or free-weights, etc", when the success is all created PRIOR to the gym. The gym, and the food is only 1%, the planning, and the "eco-system" [environment} is what yields success.

Dating, finances, are no different, its just that, you get what you hang around with. When I hung around drunks, I went the bars alot, spent loads of money on meaningless things, and because they too had no women, their attitudes rubbed off on me. It was an 'energy field' that surrounded us, that while we had fun, we also shared the same aura of energy, and people could sense that. When a girl meets a friend who's an azzhole, literally, and is insulting, she'll see you this way, UNLESS you're super-good-looking, then maybe you have a shot. Otherwise, you're gambling on your own success...




End.




A-Unit