i mean, if i have just done something wrong or where i know i am in the wrong i will give her a lot more lee way if i can honestly see where she is coming from. people have emotions and sometimes they need to let them out. like when we first started dating we went to the track on a big day and i was talking to girls and flirting like she wasn't there and she let me have it and you know, i really couldn't say antyhing because at that point in time she was correct.
but just arguing for the sake of arguing i don't do that. i simply refuse to engage. it's one thing to have a grown up discussion and as long as we are discussing things that's fine but if she just starts throwing a hissy fit for the sake of throwing a hissy i simply get my keys and leave and come back in a few hours. remove myself from the situation.
i figured out the key to arugingwith women. it doesn't matter if you are right. rather or not you are right or wrong has no outcome on her she is going to feel afterwards . women don't think like we do in that regard. so if i want what i want i don't even try to explain my point anymore beucsae she isn't listening anyway. not because she can't reason but becuase even if i do prove her right it's a temp. victory.
i don't try to prove her that it's in her best interest for her to calm the fvck down and listen to me.
my wife has a br4other that is 3 years older than she is. I don't care for him at all. he's the exact opposite of my wife. she works he doesn't. he's a leecher. he leaches off any and everyone. my wife and i do not argue a lot at all and when we do it's usually very ti vial **** that gets blown up. about what, janurary of this year her brother asked her to ask me could he borrow some money for a new business venture that he wants to do, about 15k, he wanted to have some website business built. this is not the first time he has asked for something and usually i oblige becuase she loves her brother very much and if he is happy she is happy and if she is happy i am happy. and usually it isn't **** that's too big i don't mind. and even the 15k isn't so much the issue as much as like, you have p;roven time and time again you dont' stick with **** and you have no real business plan and no idea as to what you are doing. at some point i have to put my foot down and say no and this was it. so i say no and at first she is cool with it but i could tell she was getting kinda pissy and then she made some smart allic comment the next day about not being able to buy something i had had my eye on because we were obviously broke.. i.e we are too broke to send her brother money. i let it slide. then just out of the blue she just says why are you being such an ******* to my brother and she starts yelling and getting mad and i said you know what.. it's saturday, i don't have to put up with this ****. took my son, went to the movies, went and got some ice ream, we kicked it all day long. i didn't say 2 words to her about it because my decision is final. i don't have to explain to you why i don't want to hand your brother who in 36 years has not done one god damn thing in his life.
about 7 hours later when we walked through the door she said she was sorry and now that she had calmed down i explained look.. her dad has the money and you notice that he didn't even bother to ask your dad. that right there shouldn't ell you all you need to know. if your brother can come to me himself like a man and show me why he needs the money i will drive him to the bank and give it to him myself but i'm not a charity case. **** i dont' give my own family money.
lol i even went no contact with her all day. she called me at least 5 times.
see arguing with her, woudl have made it worse. she would have dug in to her side and not listen to reason. by defusing the situation by leaving, it's kinda like a symbolic way of saying if you don't stop acting over trivial **** like this i can and will leave. in other words, when a woman tries to argue with her you have to enact an emotional response from her. she doesn't care about me being right or wrong. what she can understand in her terms however is she doesn't want to piss me off or leave me over something this trivial.
