****y/Funny..how do you know if you went overboard?

[j8snx1]

DJ's.

C&F is very effective in the start, and I can't argue with it, because C&F is GOLD! But, I'm beginning to doubt the power of C&F, because it feels like I may be overdoing it.

My scenario(s):

I use C&F and light kino on these 3 hotties I know; bag on each of them equally, share laughs, but sometimes they give me this "What the hell" look with a smile. Talk about a mixed signal.

I use C&F on this girl, and she seems cool with it; she laughs, she hits me back, etc etc. But at some points, she doesn't seem THAT happy, and I tone it down a bit, and I apologize (not excessively, just a simple "Hey, you know I'm joking, but sorry if you took it in the wrong way."


I don't want to doubt the power of C&F, because there are more girls who enjoy and laugh @ me poking fun at them than there are those who might be taking it seriously. So the question is...

How exactly do you know if you took the C&F a little overboard?
If the girl(s) is/are still laughing about the whole C&F thing, then chances are, they didn't take it to heart right?

 

[Egoist]

Originally posted by j8snx1
DJ's.

C&F is very effective in the start, and I can't argue with it, because C&F is GOLD! But, I'm beginning to doubt the power of C&F, because it feels like I may be overdoing it.

My scenario(s):

I use C&F and light kino on these 3 hotties I know; bag on each of them equally, share laughs, but sometimes they give me this "What the hell" look with a smile. Talk about a mixed signal.

I use C&F on this girl, and she seems cool with it; she laughs, she hits me back, etc etc. But at some points, she doesn't seem THAT happy, and I tone it down a bit, and I apologize (not excessively, just a simple "Hey, you know I'm joking, but sorry if you took it in the wrong way."


I don't want to doubt the power of C&F, because there are more girls who enjoy and laugh @ me poking fun at them than there are those who might be taking it seriously. So the question is...

How exactly do you know if you took the C&F a little overboard?
If the girl(s) is/are still laughing about the whole C&F thing, then chances are, they didn't take it to heart right?

you can't be a virgin and be truly ****y and funny.. :crackup:

 

[Soprano]

Originally posted by j8snx1
"Hey, you know I'm joking, but sorry if you took it in the wrong way."

yo try replacing that with like "yo lighten up im just messin with you" or something a bit lighter, that seems a bit too dramatic if you're trying to be c/f

 

[Alphathree]

Litmus test: She's not laughing.

Also remember that some girls "get it" more than others. Sometimes you won't need any C&F at all... in fact, sometimes C&F will make things worse.

If you're dealing with a cute but reserved asian girl, only light C&F is needed.

If you're dealing with a blonde bombshell, lay that sh!t on until she wants to rip off your clothes for validation.

Just remember it's about having fun, not having an agenda. You know you're going overboard if you're not having any fun and/or she's not laughing.

 

[organizedconfusion]

... "****y comedy is blending arrogance & humor.
if you are just being ****y, you come off as an a$$hole.
if you are just being funny, you are come off as a goofball.
i didn't say 'be ****y & ****y'..
i said ,be ****y & funny-
theres a difference...

if the girl isn't laughing, you're doing it wrong..."

David Deangelo


CF works on CONFIDENT GIRLS and girls that "get it" -"it's okay,
i know you're teasing me and i am cool with it"

the most confident people can laugh at themselves

if a girl is insecure and you use CF she will resent you-
also don't mistake a put down for being ****y...

i used to do that all the time

 

[OneArmDeeJay]

When they walk away, say “You’re a Jerk!”, look disgusted, and you can pretty much tell that it didn’t go right so I’ve heard




EXAMPLES OF ****Y + FUNNY

Personally I just say whatever pops in my head when talking to ANYBODY. When I bust girl’s chops I treat them as If I was talking to with my boys.

Besides of genetics I had watch professional comedians and people that are funny tell jokes, stories, and bust peoples balls and then practice until I made it sound original and my own technique and style. Another words I don’t sound fake, like I read it off of a web site or heard it off a show.

Natural ****y & Funny is just the best. Sometimes they laugh hard other times you’re the only one laughing, it happens even to the Kings of Comedy. But whatever you do DON’T apologize unless you know that you have literally cross the line. Other then that if it wasn’t funny who cares move on like it never happened.

 

[frivolousz21]

Natural ****y & Funny is just the best. Sometimes they laugh hard other times you’re the only one laughing, it happens even to the Kings of Comedy. But whatever you do DON’T apologize unless you know that you have literally cross the line. Other then that if it wasn’t funny who cares move on like it never happened.

exactly!

 

[organizedconfusion]

some of my best CF i have used...

"i like your hair , it makes me want to put you in a cage and
feed you animal crackers-"

i said to a girl with a faux hawk (and still seeing)
this one i think is pure golden when delivered correctly,
i have been scrutinzed for it being a borderline insult on
here(this site)

"you're like an angel...
ANDROGENOUS
you know..NOT REALLY masculine...
NOT REALLY feminine..."


that one worked wonders!
this girl was actually really cute but had "boyish" qualities

 

[Red Ran Amber]

How exactly do you know if you took the C&F a little overboard?

You kind of answered your own question in your examples. Basically any seriously negative response could mean you went overboard (playfully negative is good though--hitting, etc). You said you were getting weird looks and they seemed unhappy at times, this could mean either you went overboard and actually insulted her, or maybe your delivery was incongruent and she's confused. Maybe it's a sh!t test to see if you're "for real" or if you'll break state and apologize (Don't!!).

If you really do go overboard, what happens is she stops seeing you as being attainable. There's a balance between being attainable and making them work to get with you. You want to make them work (C&F does this by essentially playing hard-to-get) but if you go too far and they stop seeing you as attainable at all, their self-rejection-mechanism triggers and they essentially "give up." If you think you're getting close to this point, I'd say start screening and qualifying them.

If she reacts poorly to something and you think you did go overboard, don't apologize. That's totally incongruent with the ****y attitude that she's seen so far and will negate all the work you've just done. It'll make everything else you've been saying seem like an act. It's basically letting her pull you out of state, which is always bad.

Soprano's suggestion is good. If you think you've overdone it, stay playful and say something like "hey, lighten up! I'm just playing with you. You do have a good sense of humor, right? 'Cause I need a girl with a good sense of humor..." The first part should defuse the problem without breaking state or accepting blame for the problem. In fact, it subtly implies that it's her fault there's a problem. The second part moves right into screening and qualifying. You screen her on her sense of humor, and preemptively qualify her by telling her you like a girl with a good sense of humor. Of course now she will say she does have a good sense of humor, and you should reward that with a smile or a positive comment or turning more towards her, or something else that communicates approval. Even if she really doesn't have a good sense of humor, she'll probably say that she does, and since you've qualified her for having one now, she will probably try harder to live up to that expectation after that.

 

[BrotherAP]

If you have to ask if you've gone too far, then I can assure you that you have. C&F, just like any other conversational device such as story telling, joking, greetings, etc., is something that should be naturally a part of your personality and not what defines it. When something happens that allows for a great C&F response that just pops into your head, then that's when it's great to use.

A little bit of ****iness shows that you are a confident person, when counterbalanced by being a very nice person aside from that. Too much, however, and instead of confident you are arrogant.

If you're still trying to be C&F after you've found your confidence, then you are trying too hard. It should come naturally, and it probably does, so making a conscious effort to be more ****y almost garauntees that you'll cross the line.