****y and Funny stuff FOCUSED ON HER NOT FOCUSED ON YOU

[alphamale1]

Hello

it appears that ****y and funny stuff focused on her seems to get the women liking us oppose to the ****y and funny stuff focused on us which is VAIN HUMOUR.

eg. Her: i like u
Me: i like me too
is FOCUSED ON U

whereas

eg. Her: would you like to dance?
Me: sure, on one condition promise to not step on my toes
is FOCUSED ON HER.

This is one of the definite reasons why some women repel from ****y and funny comments. When the FOCUSED IS ON HER you are focusing your attention on her, thus making her feel special and also since u make her feel special she starts to confirm to herself that u are the prize.

whereas the FOCUSED ON YOU makes out that u are already the prize. she has to find that out for herself. i dont understand why men try to prove or fool them into thinking they are the prize. The women will find out whether u are the real deal so why try to tell them u are the prize by using C+F FOCUSED ON YOU. Do that and you come across as VAIN and up yourself. Proof is in the pudding.

so for starters my name is Ben and it took me a while to figure this out. But we need a list of ****Y AND FUNNY humour FOCUSED ON HER, not FOCUSED ON US. Which brings to another point, you can start using C+F focused on YOU when she sees u as the prize, that way the C+F focused on you makes you come across as CONGRUENT.

Here are some FOCUSED ON HER STUFF, we need some more so add heaps ok?

1) Her: would u like to dance?
Me: sure, on one condition promise to not step on my toes

2) Me: may i sit here?
Her: sure
Me: as long as you behave yourself

3) Her: (looking at me)
Me: if theres a question u want to ask me, the answer is yes?

Now your guys game will be tighter.

Ben

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

I like your out of the box thinking on this subject..but, it goes deeper than a HER vs You type deal.

C/F works as long as its 'off the wall' type thing the woman doesn't expect to hear. As long as you come off ****/funny and not ARROGANT..than women will be atracted.

Her: Hey..would you like to dance.
Me: Ok..as long as you promise not to touch my ass.

Her: I like you
Me: Of course you do, what's not to like?

Regardless of what you say, if you say it with a smile, half grin, with that half eyebrow raised kind of look and attitude...it'll come off just fine.

The key in any of the c/f is raising her interest level by showing her that you are a confident fella that knows he's desired..yet, doesn't take himself too seriously.

 

[alphamale1]

Another point i would like to mention is:

If you use C+F FOCUSED ON HER, you also come across as SUBTLE which is also important. If you use C+F FOCUSED ON YOU you come across as non subtle that u are trying to impress her by showing you are the prize for example

Me: are you someone confident enough to accept a sincere compliment?
Her: sure
Me: cool, me too, ok you go first
Her: hahaha
FOCUSED ON YOU

see this example shows that u are trying to impress her by showing that you are the prize by being [ OBVIOUSLY confident
whereas

Her: would you like to dance?
Me: sure, on one condition promise to not step on my toes.
FOCUSED ON HER

is showing that the focus is on her therefore making her feel special and that u come across as not trying to hit on her or showing that you are the prize. Very subtle which also makes u come across as Quiet Confidence whereas the FOCUSED ON YOU is Obviously confidence. Two very distinctive differences and the Quiet Confidence is a better choice.

So lets have the ****y and Funny FOCUSED ON HER lines coming......

 

[omizzi]

Her: Hey..would you like to dance.
Me: Ok..as long as you promise not to touch my ass.

Her: I like you
Me: Of course you do, what's not to like?

-HPNOTIQ- I like your version a lot better, it is very funny and so creative. You got n e more good stuff to share?

 

[cant think of a user name]

alphamale1, your idea to focus more on the girl is a good one because it doesn't make the guy seem like an arrogant, stuck-up individual. I think too many guys try this arrogance thing and fail because they took C+F too far.

-HPNOTIQ-'s examples are good also because they are more playful than ****y, something which is much more friendlier but also funny to listen to.

 

[squirrels]

Jesus...SHUT UP about the C&F.

Too many people here are trying to use "****y-funny stuff" without being either confident OR funny themselves.

First of all, STOP focusing on the girl. If you use "C&F" as a get-the-girl tactic and not as an essential element of the persona you project, it will seem laughably ridiculous. She will say, "awww...he tries soooo hard" and pat you on the head, then walk away and start throwing eyes at the smooth stud across the floor...that is if you don't fvck up and insult her.

Second of all, stop USING ****y-funny. It's not a wrench you use to ratchet a girl's legs open. It's not a "line" or series of "lines" you throw at a girl to try to win her affection. It's not a "tactic". It's an integral part of conversation. That's why you guys come off as "arrogant", or "insecure" or even OFFENSIVE when you "use C&F", because it's completely incongruent and doesn't flow with the nature of the conversation...you FORCE it in because you're trying to impress the girl and she can DETECT that. These "lines" should FLOW naturally from conversation. Which means the first thing you need are BASIC SOCIAL SKILLS.

If you want to be "****y-funny" around women, you need to

1) Learn to talk to women...just hold conversations, nothing fancy.

2) Become confident with yourself. Not try to tell yourself that you're confident, but KNOW that you like who you are and you control and continually strive to improve and enjoy the life you live.

3) Learn about HUMOR. Watch funny movies/shows. Watch some stand-up. Learn to observe the funny things in everyday life. Learn how to surprise and shock people without offending them. Learn the key social technique of SUBTLETY. People appreciate when someone is so subtle with their humor, they have to say to themselves, "Damn, did he MEAN to say that? Is he that clever?"

Then put it together and get out in the field. But don't "use CF" on women. Just TALK to them. Go up to them and flirt with them and hit on them...and you'll find that you don't have to USE ANYTHING. You'll naturally stand taller, come off more confident, and you'll start SPEAKING in a more self-assured manner.

And you'll find yourself dropping "C&F lines" and thinking to yourself immediately afterward, "DAMN, did I just use that? Kick-ass!" And the most beautiful thing is that it will be so subtle and natural that she'll absolutely LOVE it. Not only is she totally into how great you are, she'll BELIEVE that you're a naturally ****y, confident guy because you ARE, and you're not just throwing lines out there to make yourself look better. And it's so subtle, so uncontrived, so matter-of-fact and smooth that you MUST be NATURALLY like this. You've been like it all along! It's not an act, it's not a front...she's actually found a STRONG, SELF-CONFIDENT GUY WHO'S FUN TO BE AROUND!! She'll be dripping like a leaky faucet.

And the best thing is, there's no "what do I do now?" Because you're CONSTANTLY delivering "****y-funny" to her, because you ARE confident, and you ARE funny.

 

[duke007]

Originally posted by -HPNOTIQ-

Her: I like you
Me: Of course you do, what's not to like?

This type of thing works if you say it in the right way. But don't use C+F to impress a girl, say these type of things to spice up a conversation for the benefit of both of you.

Field tested by me:
Girl: "The supervisors here really love you!" (for various reasons discussed)
Me: "Of course they do, I'm a lovable guy"
Girl: " I'm lovable too...." (haha classic qualifying)

This is not outright arrogant but still focussed on you, which I think is more powerful than directing it at her. (If she's particularly sensitive she may think you're being condescending or on a power trip by saying things like, 'only if your sensible'). But having said that, these type of lines are extremely effective, just not as strong as the style I gave an example of.

 

[alphamale1]

ok so far no ****y and Funny stuff FOCUSED ON HER.
Give us some more examples
ive given three. lets see some more.

1) Her: would u like to dance?
Me: sure, on one condition promise to not step on my toes

2) Me: may i sit here?
Her: sure
Me: as long as you behave yourself

3) Her: (looking at me)
Me: if theres a question u want to ask me, the answer is yes?

 

[Reach]

*girl on her own with lots of empties around her*
"Hey, cheer up, just because you don't have any friends doesn't mean you have to be an alcoholic!"

"Oh, these aren't all mine! I have freinds!!!"

--

"So, do you think people really have types?"

"No, why do you?"

"yeah, (something opposite to her)"

--

"Oh, poor thing, you're by yourself? Okay! (look annoyed) I'll take you."

--

"What's wrong? Don't you like cute guys talking to you?"

"Yeah!"

"Then smile."

 

[comote]

Some guys think about this way too much.

Look do you want ****y and funny to work for you.

Say things to make YOURSELF laugh. All those funny things that pop into your head, just say them. If you learn to do this
you will naturally come across as ****y and funny.

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Originally posted by squirrels
Jesus...SHUT UP about the C&F.

Too many people here are trying to use "****y-funny stuff" without being either confident OR funny themselves.

First of all, STOP focusing on the girl. If you use "C&F" as a get-the-girl tactic and not as an essential element of the persona you project, it will seem laughably ridiculous. She will say, "awww...he tries soooo hard" and pat you on the head, then walk away and start throwing eyes at the smooth stud across the floor...that is if you don't fvck up and insult her.

Second of all, stop USING ****y-funny. It's not a wrench you use to ratchet a girl's legs open. It's not a "line" or series of "lines" you throw at a girl to try to win her affection. It's not a "tactic". It's an integral part of conversation. That's why you guys come off as "arrogant", or "insecure" or even OFFENSIVE when you "use C&F", because it's completely incongruent and doesn't flow with the nature of the conversation...you FORCE it in because you're trying to impress the girl and she can DETECT that. These "lines" should FLOW naturally from conversation. Which means the first thing you need are BASIC SOCIAL SKILLS.

If you want to be "****y-funny" around women, you need to

1) Learn to talk to women...just hold conversations, nothing fancy.

2) Become confident with yourself. Not try to tell yourself that you're confident, but KNOW that you like who you are and you control and continually strive to improve and enjoy the life you live.

3) Learn about HUMOR. Watch funny movies/shows. Watch some stand-up. Learn to observe the funny things in everyday life. Learn how to surprise and shock people without offending them. Learn the key social technique of SUBTLETY. People appreciate when someone is so subtle with their humor, they have to say to themselves, "Damn, did he MEAN to say that? Is he that clever?"

Then put it together and get out in the field. But don't "use CF" on women. Just TALK to them. Go up to them and flirt with them and hit on them...and you'll find that you don't have to USE ANYTHING. You'll naturally stand taller, come off more confident, and you'll start SPEAKING in a more self-assured manner.

And you'll find yourself dropping "C&F lines" and thinking to yourself immediately afterward, "DAMN, did I just use that? Kick-ass!" And the most beautiful thing is that it will be so subtle and natural that she'll absolutely LOVE it. Not only is she totally into how great you are, she'll BELIEVE that you're a naturally ****y, confident guy because you ARE, and you're not just throwing lines out there to make yourself look better. And it's so subtle, so uncontrived, so matter-of-fact and smooth that you MUST be NATURALLY like this. You've been like it all along! It's not an act, it's not a front...she's actually found a STRONG, SELF-CONFIDENT GUY WHO'S FUN TO BE AROUND!! She'll be dripping like a leaky faucet.

And the best thing is, there's no "what do I do now?" Because you're CONSTANTLY delivering "****y-funny" to her, because you ARE confident, and you ARE funny.

Everyone should read squirrels post again. People must realize that acting C/F and actually BEING C/F isn't something you can just do memorizing a bunch of lines.

However, to take from his "stand up comedy" analogy..it is always good to have material to start with. These lines work..and work well..but like any good comedian knows...its not just the joke that will make people laugh, its the DELIVERY.

So practice, watch a lot of Eddie Murphy, Dave Chapelle...learn how to communicate with people. Work on how to read people, how to become animated, and how to be witty.

It take practice, but most importantly....it takes a positive, confident mindset to do any of this DJing.

 

[alphamale1]

Squirrels,

Maybe you might think that focusing on a woman is ridiculous but maybe your ****y and funny humour is focused on a woman when u dont even realise it and maybe when u use ****y and funny humour focused on you, she likes u because she already sees u as the prize

or maybe you use ****y and funny focused on u and she doesnt see u as the prize and therefore sees u as TRYING too hard

i do believe in the following things:

1) Only using ****y and funny FOCUSED ON HER only in context as to not be forced or else like u say it comes across DETECTED.

2) ****y and Funny humour FOCUSED ON YOU is not Charming at all. Its VAIN. Where the fine line between Charming and VAIN HUMOUR (****y and Funny focused on you) is, is whats critical.

THE REASON why is because C+F FOCUSED ON YOU and CHARMING contradicts itself. So knowing where the fine line is allow u to have both part of your personality without crossing over the fine lines. Knowing this allow u be to be Charming and ****y + Funny FOCUSED ON YOU at the same time which makes u come across as a SUPER DUPER GUY. Not some ****y funny guy
but my preference is only be C+F focused on you when she knows u are the prize. maybe she already knew u were the prize when she laid eyes on u i dont know.

3) Focusing on her make her feel special but its done in a subtle way.

Ben

 

[alphamale1]

and if u act C+F FOCUSED ON YOU and Charming combined, like i said it contradicts. You do that on a congruent basis and then she will see it as contradictments, she will say:

1) Be yourself

or betta yet

2) Dont try to be someone your not.

CONTRADICTMENT make u come across as insincere, non genuine.
and thats what happens when a man uses C+F FOCUSED ON YOU rather FOCUSED ON HER.

FOCUSED ON HER = Charming + Charming = 'The real deal'
FOCUSED ON YOU = NOT CHARMING + CHARMING = insincerity (cancels each other out)

however like i mentioned before there is a way to have
FOCUSED ON YOU AND CHARMING at the same time.

Ben

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by alphamale1
and if u act C+F FOCUSED ON YOU and Charming combined, like i said it contradicts. You do that on a congruent basis and then she will see it as contradictments, she will say:

1) Be yourself

or betta yet

2) Dont try to be someone your not.

CONTRADICTMENT make u come across as insincere, non genuine.
and thats what happens when a man uses C+F FOCUSED ON YOU rather FOCUSED ON HER.

It's what happens when you ACT C&F. Period.

You're going to incredible lengths to try not to APPEAR like you're trying to be someone else....the simple solution is NOT to be someone else.

You're going to incredible lengths trying to convince this girl to see you as the prize.

Why not just BE the prize? There's no greater sincerity than that.

Then your "C&F" doesn't have to focus ANYWHERE...it's ambient. You live and breathe it. This is what you're trying to fake by USING C&F lines here and there and focusing them one way or the other. You might get her attention, but if you really don't believe it, the BETTER women are going to see right through it.

Stop worrying about appearing to be the prize and start BEING the prize.

 

[comote]

Originally posted by squirrels
Jesus...SHUT UP about the C&F.

Too many people here are trying to use "****y-funny stuff" without being either confident OR funny themselves.

First of all, STOP focusing on the girl. If you use "C&F" as a get-the-girl tactic and not as an essential element of the persona you project, it will seem laughably ridiculous. She will say, "awww...he tries soooo hard" and pat you on the head, then walk away and start throwing eyes at the smooth stud across the floor...that is if you don't fvck up and insult her.

Second of all, stop USING
****y-funny. It's not a wrench you use to ratchet a girl's legs open. It's not a "line" or series of "lines" you throw at a girl to try to win her affection. It's not a "tactic". It's an integral part of conversation. That's why you guys come off as "arrogant", or "insecure" or even OFFENSIVE when you "use C&F", because it's completely incongruent and doesn't flow with the nature of the conversation...you FORCE it in because you're trying to impress the girl and she can DETECT that. These "lines" should FLOW naturally from conversation. Which means the first thing you need are BASIC SOCIAL SKILLS.

If you want to be "****y-funny" around women, you need to

1) Learn to talk to women...just hold conversations, nothing fancy.

2) Become confident with yourself. Not try to tell yourself that you're confident, but KNOW that you like who you are and you control and continually strive to improve and enjoy the life you live.

3) Learn about HUMOR. Watch funny movies/shows. Watch some stand-up. Learn to observe the funny things in everyday life. Learn how to surprise and shock people without offending them. Learn the key social technique of SUBTLETY. People appreciate when someone is so subtle with their humor, they have to say to themselves, "Damn, did he MEAN to say that? Is he that clever?"

Then put it together and get out in the field. But don't "use CF" on women. Just TALK to them. Go up to them and flirt with them and hit on them...and you'll find that you don't have to USE ANYTHING. You'll naturally stand taller, come off more confident, and you'll start SPEAKING in a more self-assured manner.

And you'll find yourself dropping "C&F lines" and thinking to yourself immediately afterward, "DAMN, did I just use that? Kick-ass!" And the most beautiful thing is that it will be so subtle and natural that she'll absolutely LOVE it. Not only is she totally into how great you are, she'll BELIEVE that you're a naturally ****y, confident guy because you ARE, and you're not just throwing lines out there to make yourself look better. And it's so subtle, so uncontrived, so matter-of-fact and smooth that you MUST be NATURALLY like this. You've been like it all along! It's not an act, it's not a front...she's actually found a STRONG, SELF-CONFIDENT GUY WHO'S FUN TO BE AROUND!! She'll be dripping like a leaky faucet.

And the best thing is, there's no "what do I do now?" Because you're CONSTANTLY delivering "****y-funny" to her, because you ARE confident, and you ARE funny.

Great post Squirrels, although I disagree on one point.

Subtlety is great and when it is used it is brilliant but I don't think anyone should concentrate on making there lines subtle.

Sometimes the funniest joke is the obvious one that no one else has the balls to say.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by comote
Great post Squirrels, although I disagree on one point.

Subtlety is great and when it is used it is brilliant but I don't think anyone should concentrate on making there lines subtle.

Sometimes the funniest joke is the obvious one that no one else has the balls to say.

Subtlety and ballsiness are not mutually exclusive.

 

[comote]

Originally posted by squirrels
Subtlety and ballsiness are not mutually exclusive.

not saying they are, subtlety and obvious are.

 

[alphamale1]

Squirrels,

Like i said before, you are the prize when you turn the FOCUS from you to her.

I do not need to appear to be the prize cos she already sees me as the prize when I use C+F FOCUSED ON HER, then i change to C+F FOCUSED ON ME cos now that she sees me as a great catch these C+F FOCUSED ON ME is appealing cos it matches my wonderful personality traits.

People always talk about themselves but they never talk about the other person. Be a conversationalist and people want to know you cos if you find them interesting, they find u interesting.

now that the focus is on her, you can bring it to you when you feel like it now that she likes u alot. When you make her feel special she finds u special. Do it in a cool, calm, collective way and she will make u the prize.

This knowledge has helped me become what i am now, a Quiet Confidence Smooth Charming Alphamale Bad Boy guy.

Ben

 

[hongchang]

1st of all, wanted to say hi to everyone. This is my first post here.
After reading all these posts, i'm still a bit confused as to how to implement the C and F thing. The impression i get is, it's a mindset/mentality thing, and not a bunch of lines to be memorised and used?
So, would it be correct to say that when we want to be ****y and funny, we would actually need to change our character or at least some part of our fundamental character? Wouldn't that require a ton of effort? Heard of the clique "A leopard never changes its spots" ?
Would there be an easier way to incorporate C and F into our daily lives? Changing one's character seems a bit extreme to me..

 

[alphamale1]

Hey anyone got any

C+F stuff FOCUSED ON HER NOT FOCUSED ON YOU

Ben