disciple
Senior Don Juan
This is taken from my reply to a post from the Mature section.
A fellow DJ asked for help with the whole ****y and funny thing after having a disastrous conversation with a girl while trying to be ****y and funny.
I'm not going to waste time reiterating what others have already said so I'll add something new to this discussion.
I think your biggest problem is that your TRYING to be ****y and funny and it sounds forced, unnatural, boring, irritating, and confrontational and none of this is attractive to a woman.
In order for your ****y and funnyness to have a good effect it has to come from WITHIN and not from studying some ****y and funny tips or something.
It is more of an attitude that influences how you communicate with a girl more so than a technique you learn and practice.
I don't know how many female friends you have but think about how you communicate with them (assuming you think of them as ONLY a friend and not a potential lover).
You joke and kid around with them and your not afraid of just going with the flow and you don't worry about what to say next or try to say something ****y or funny to get them to feel a certain way about you.
Or think about your male friends.
How do you talk to them?
Do you try to be ****y and funny or do you just open your mouth and let your words flow because you feel relaxed and you are not worried about creating a certain result or effect with your words?
True ****iness is an attitude and it doesn't mean being rude or obnoxious.
It means that you are confident enough in yourself that you don't feel the need to do anything to impress anyone, including a hot chick.
So you feel free to let your natural personality shine without being artificial or without TRYING to do or be something.
The same thing goes for being funny.
You can't try to be funny because the harder you try the less funny you are.
People are usually the funniest when they don't try to be funny and say whatever they feel like saying because they don't worry about whether someone will find them funny or not or whether someone likes them or not.
Just maintain a fun, positive attitude but don't be afraid to bust on her. Keep it smooth and don't be too aggressive or come off as obnoxious.
Just learn to relax and be easy with it.
Check out Allen Thompson's article in the Articles section on the main page about conversating for maximum attraction.
That will show you how to connect with the girl so she feels more comfortable talking to you and then follow my suggestions for letting your natural ****iness and funnyness come out from the inside which is where it should come from.
When you have the right attitude around women, being ****y and funny and challenging to a chick will come naturally and it is alot of fun for both you and her.
If both of your aren't enjoying the flow and exchange of conversation then that means that either she isn't feeling you or you are doing something wrong.
"The strong rule the weak but the wise rule the strong".
A fellow DJ asked for help with the whole ****y and funny thing after having a disastrous conversation with a girl while trying to be ****y and funny.
I'm not going to waste time reiterating what others have already said so I'll add something new to this discussion.
I think your biggest problem is that your TRYING to be ****y and funny and it sounds forced, unnatural, boring, irritating, and confrontational and none of this is attractive to a woman.
In order for your ****y and funnyness to have a good effect it has to come from WITHIN and not from studying some ****y and funny tips or something.
It is more of an attitude that influences how you communicate with a girl more so than a technique you learn and practice.
I don't know how many female friends you have but think about how you communicate with them (assuming you think of them as ONLY a friend and not a potential lover).
You joke and kid around with them and your not afraid of just going with the flow and you don't worry about what to say next or try to say something ****y or funny to get them to feel a certain way about you.
Or think about your male friends.
How do you talk to them?
Do you try to be ****y and funny or do you just open your mouth and let your words flow because you feel relaxed and you are not worried about creating a certain result or effect with your words?
True ****iness is an attitude and it doesn't mean being rude or obnoxious.
It means that you are confident enough in yourself that you don't feel the need to do anything to impress anyone, including a hot chick.
So you feel free to let your natural personality shine without being artificial or without TRYING to do or be something.
The same thing goes for being funny.
You can't try to be funny because the harder you try the less funny you are.
People are usually the funniest when they don't try to be funny and say whatever they feel like saying because they don't worry about whether someone will find them funny or not or whether someone likes them or not.
Just maintain a fun, positive attitude but don't be afraid to bust on her. Keep it smooth and don't be too aggressive or come off as obnoxious.
Just learn to relax and be easy with it.
Check out Allen Thompson's article in the Articles section on the main page about conversating for maximum attraction.
That will show you how to connect with the girl so she feels more comfortable talking to you and then follow my suggestions for letting your natural ****iness and funnyness come out from the inside which is where it should come from.
When you have the right attitude around women, being ****y and funny and challenging to a chick will come naturally and it is alot of fun for both you and her.
If both of your aren't enjoying the flow and exchange of conversation then that means that either she isn't feeling you or you are doing something wrong.
"The strong rule the weak but the wise rule the strong".