writing a letter goodbye: girl opinion plz

[jayhu12]

Theres this girl I liked for about 2 years, She has a boyfriend, She knows that I like her, but its always been weird between me and her, were not exactly talking right now. I'm leaving to california soon and won't see her again. I don't wanna tell her good bye in person because theres so much I wanna tell her and I know I'd forget something. It would also probably hurt me a lot. So I wrote this 1500 word letter thats says everything, why things were weird, why I liked her, good luck in the future etc. I'm not trying to gain anything, play games or any junk. I just want her to know. The question is, would I look like a complete nutcase? would this letter be something you show your friends and laugh at? I just don't know.

 

[Big Pappy]

Never put anything in writing if you can help it. If you feel like you must, write it and save it for ten days, then look at it again. You'll likely see lots of things that you don't want to be reminded of later.

 

[Jasmine]

Keep it brief, only say what you have to. I personally wouldn't do it (although its easy to say that when you're not in your situation).

I would maybe drop her a note saying that you're moving, give her a forwarding address/number and say that if shes ever in town... Make it as light as possible; it sounds as if things got weird cos they got a bit heavy??

Just my take

Jas

 

[Legend]

i say write it and send it....send whatever you have to send dude. Do what you think is right, tell her everything that is on your mind and how you feel. You are leaving so it really does'nt matter what she thinks now all that matters is how you feel and what you need to let out. I say go for it

 

[TesuqueRed]

Originally posted by jayhu12
...I just want her to know.

Why do you think she'd care?

The question is, would I look like a complete nutcase?

Pathetic. AFC--pure AFC. Nutcase? Somewhat.

...would this letter be something you show your friends and laugh at?

It's something she'd show her friends and BF and laugh...

Just go to CA and never look back. Study the bible and find out why this is such a bad move.

But I'm not a girl, so you don't have to listen to what I say. I think you're right, because hearing what one of the women have to say if they received something like that could be more brutal--you'd pay attention to it.

 

[jbbrain]

Write her something, but NOT THAT.

What's the point? Sure, you have nothign to prove to her now, you don't care about what she thinks bla bla bla.

That all makes sense.

But why compromise all the hard work you've put into studying Sosuave, become a real MAN, just so you can have the pleasure of sending somethign so inherently weak (and without much consequence)?

You've come a long way I'm sure. Prove to yourself that you don't need ANYTHING else from this girl (closure, ego boost) by not writing the letter you had INTENDED to send.

Again, it's not about looking AFC in HER EYES. You said it right, who cares? You'll be in Cali.

It's about being AFC in YOUR EYES when absolutely nothing beneficial (she'll be across the country if you hadn't noticed) could come from it.

Tell her good bye, It was good knowing you, and look forward to all the Cali bytcyhes coming your way.

Enjoy!

 

[coin]

Don't do this, man.

A F C

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

I Disagree... The chance he will ever see her or do anything with her ever is like 0... If it's bothering him emotionally he should just tell her IN PERSON how it is or how he feels... This will be good for his emotions imo.

 

[Sax God]

Don't do it. I was in your situation a few years back, except she was the one leaving. I wrote the letter, but, lo and behold, SHE MOVED BACK! Now, everything was out in the open, and it was a lot worse between us.

Just don't do it.

 

[Blaaaaat]

DON"T DO IT! You will regret it.

 

[( . )( . )]

letters?.......................maybe you could send her a nice bouqet of flowers aswell.

 

[1hepcat]

Here's my suggestion. Write the letter, get it all out, then IMMEDIATELY go find a lighter or matches and BURN IT!!! DON'T SEND IT. DON'T DON'T DON'T DON'T DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[bp1974]

You know what separates clueless AFCs from recovering AFCs? The need to write long, rambling, pointless letters to ex gf's and oneitis's.

I used to suffer the same affliction. Back in the day, I wrote a four page diatribe to my ex, a full two months after she'd dumped me and vanished. All about how I realised I'd been so wrong.

If you must write, keep it brief. No more than ten sentences. But please, don't write.

 

[Cremasta]

I think you can see a pattern emerging here from the posted responses.

You have a bigger problem though... with the exception of a few enlightened posters here and maybe one or two I know personally, I would not be looking to get advice from women too often in the first place.

I reckon at least half of all women you asked would say that it was a romantic gesture and how much they wished they would get a letter like that 'because it would make them feel so good'.