Wow i just dropped one of my social groups

Jokerlsk

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The past week, idk why, but one of my social groups, what i would consider to be my 'main' group has suddenly dropped me. They exclude me and it's obvious. I dont' really know why. I'll give you the background story

There's this club that all my friends wanted to go to. On sundays they have teen night, so they all decided we were going there. I said, 'maybe' because it's sort of far away and my parents don't want me out somewhere far away. I asked, and they said no. They all go, have a great time, and i get a call from one of my bros asking to hang out. So i went bowling and spent the night with him. It was fun. The next day i get texts asking me what i did, and i tell them. They get pissed. I mean, what is this? I'm not allowed to have other friends? They think I ditched them, but i obviously didn't. So the days pass by and I see their fb statuses. They hang out, they go to breakfast, lunch, movies, dinner, my entire group. And for some strange reason I'm never notified. The entire past week and a half. I gave them the benefit of the doubt because i had to babysit on the week days, but last night was the last straw.

I was texting one of my buddies gf's whose out of town. She texted me and asked what i was doing. I said playing xbox. And she asked why i wasn't at the movies with ALL of them. I told her to ask her bf. She's one of my close friends and she was really mad. I knew at that point she was gonna guilt him into hanging out with me so i went ahead and made plans with other friends just in case. So today i get a text from one of my 'friends' in that group asking if i want to go ice skating. I said, "I don't think i can, I have plans." and he said, "you don't think?" and i said, "I can't. After you get excluded for a week straight you start making plans with other people." and he said, "We didn't exclude you, you were babysitting." and i said, "really, i was babysitting last night? How was the movie?" and he said, "I don't know what to say" and i said, "You really do. Say what you really want to say to me because you obviously have some **** with me." and he said, "I'm sorry." and i said, "No you aren't dude. You aren't sorry, you just got caught." he never replied

an hour later this attention ***** whose in that group texted me and said, "Hey, wanna go ice skating with us?" and i said, "No" and she said, "Why not?" and i said, "Plans." and she said, "k..." and i said, "It's gonna be a blast." she never replied. I one worded her because i know attention *****s HATE that. I'm sick and tired of their bull****. I didn't do anything wrong, and they're trying to punish me for having other friends. Reality check, the world doesn't revolve around them. It's really just getting on my nerves. I don't know what i'm supposed to do. I pretty much gave them a subtle "**** you"
 

shortie

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it seems that you have multiple social groups so dont sweat this soo much. i know it feels like crap and i have been there but if they are going to treat you like that then they dont deserve to be your friends.
if you think they are genuinely trying to hang out with you and not just feeling guilty about getting caught then give it another chance, maybe it will work out again and you guys can get past that.
friends are hard to come by but i wouldnt wanna put up with friends who treat me like that, i rather chill at home than run around after them thinking that they are my friends and want to hang out.
 

Jokerlsk

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I do have a lot of friends, but this was sort of my main one for a while. It does really feel bad, but the entire time i spent with them felt like sort of a lie. I never really could trust those guys, and i never really let them get to know me. Those guys were always against me no matter what i did. I don't need people like that, and I'm glad i learned sooner than later. I don't know if i handled it perfectly, but I did what i had to do. I'm not gonna let people walk on me. There are still some people in that group I wanna remain friends with, and there's a girl I like in that group as well. I'm just fed up with that bs. I'm not really into one sided friendship.
 

maosrdbf

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dude holy crap.. you're lookin into that like that group is a woman.

i went through 3 different groups in hs alone.

your problems seem waay easier ha. I personally would have confronted them all in person. Never give someone time to react if you want the truth because then you can observe reactions and see if they are being honest or not through body language.

one thing i noticed, when i use to go through various groups of friends, it was usually my fault. I notice i dont fit in, or ill start getting annoyed with certain people, or maybe ill think someone has it in for me. Truth is, i think in most cases, it was all in my head. Just chill out with them man. Good friends are friends regardless of stupid ****.

If they bother you, find other friends. Simple as that.
 

Jokerlsk

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Part of that group consists of chicks.
I just don't understand wtf is going on. I didn't do anything wrong. It's not a crime to have other friends, and i didn't ditch them, i just couldn't go.
I don't think this is my fault, and I'm the type of person who admits he's wrong when he is wrong, but in this case I'm not, and I don't really know what to do about it
 

Erik V

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That sounds really strange, Jokerisk. It sounds like someone there has a beef with you, yes. It would be interesting to hear what it is when you have found out

Losing friends is bad, especially when you are out of high school and college and don't meet tons of new people any longer. At work, you only see the same people every day. So I won't say that it's nothing. But I guess the only thing to do is go on with the other parts of your life. In time, you will fill up the void that group left.

We usually have no more than five friends in our adult life, because there is no time for more than that. (Read this somewhere, and it seems true.) As long as we have three to five friends, I would say things are all right.
 
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