Would you bother with an attractive woman if she's super selfish?

[Dusoa]

I'd been in a long relationship that ended a few months ago, and hadn't even attempted dating since. But I met this girl a couple of weeks ago, and I decided I was finally gonna give all my years worth of reading about game a shot in the field. Much to my surprise, it worked out and I scored a date with by far the hottest girl I've ever gone out with, (easily an 8 or 9 by most guys standards).

We went out to a really nice dinner, we have hardly anything in common, but that was kind of the fun of it. She was super flirtatious the whole date, and I definitely felt like this could get places within the next few dates. It was interesting though, while on the date she seemed really attentive and interested in me, and asked me a lot of questions (though this could've just been her attempt to assess my value).

Here's the weird thing though, since that first date, we've already scheduled a second and we've been texting each other every few days, but I think it just hit me today...this chick is selfish as hell!

example texts:
Me: How was your drive back? I had a really great time with you.
Her: Good, thanks I had a good time.
(notice SHE had a good time, not with me)

Me: Hope you had a happy easter
Her: I did thanks!
(notice she doesn't seem to care whether or not I did)

These are just some of numerous examples from the last few weeks, and it's quite obvious from talking to her that she has an ego the size of a small planet, but why wouldn't she, I'm sure she's had years of reinforcement from guys complimenting her looks. Thing is, isn't it just human decency that if someone makes a pleasantry with you like "How are you today?" you would respond with something such as "Good. How are you?".

I'm a long time lurker on these forums and have read The Game and Rules of... many times over, so I get the gist of everything, but I'll openly admit, I'm not out on sarging missions or anything. I'm a decent looking guy, and really just want to better understand female phsycology so I can stop getting manipulated, finding women has never been a problem for me, but not getting treated like **** by them...well that's a whole other story.

So as a first post on these forums my question to you guys is, would you continue to date a chick who is so painfully self-absorbed, not to mention I'm probably just one of many plates she's spinning, if it meant that down the road you might have a chance at sleeping with her? And of course being seen with her makes me the envy of all my friends, because she is like ridiculously hot. I am having a really hard time NEXTing her (due to her looks) but being with someone that is so vain is also a massive turnoff so it's a bit of quandary.

 

[evan12]

her IL is not that high , women become more caring when they have IL high .

 

[Dusoa]

her IL is not that high , women become more caring when they have IL high .

See I thought that too, but I guess this is one of those "which came first the chicken or the egg" type things. Because I don't even want to bother with trying to raise her IL if she is really that self-absorbed.

If I pass a stranger in the street and say, "Hello, how are you?" I will bet you that 99% of the time their reaction will be "Good, and you?". The fact that this is someone I actually know, and have treated well, and she doesn't even possess these extremely basic manners, tells me she's likely a total waste of my time, but like I said...hot.

 

[Aristippus]

From your description she sounds very annoying. I wouldn't give a woman like this the time of day, no matter how physically attractive she is, with an ugly attitude and being annoyingly self-absorbed, she's about as appealing as a 400 lb. ugly chick with warts all over her face. I know, you're trying to excuse her vanity and selfishness and saying it is "because she's so hot that guys spoil her" or some other b.s. rationalization. The point is, sh*t is sh*t no matter how much you try to sugar coat it. And no matter how thick of a layer of sugar you try to coat it with, it's still sh*t.

The idea isn't to get laid at all costs. You have to have some pride and dignity. Don't sell your soul just to get laid. That's not what being a man is about. Always put priority on you self-worth first, over getting a woman like this. I hope that if you don't have sense enough to stop pursuing a woman of low value, who also happens to have low interest, that you will fail miserably with this particular woman. In the end you'll actually win if things don't pan out with this one. Let's hope you have sense enough not to waste your time on an undeserving woman. Go out and find the good ones!

 

[QuadDeuces]

Look for red flags. If she's a genuine BPD or Narcissist, root and boot.

 

[Cremasta]

This came to mind
http://www.ratemymotivational.com/1...ht_now_somebody_somewhere_is_tired_of_putting

The short answer is no. I've had selfish gf's in the past and they do nothing but annoy you, your family and friends.

It might be worth sticking it out with her for a few months till you get bored with the sex. Plus you'll work out the kind of girl you DON'T want in the future.

 

[Burroughs]

Most cute biyaches are azzholes because they never get checked like this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvSGau8pp0k

 

[bigneil]

Selfishness is probably the worst trait, but also extremely common. Young women in particular are perhaps the most selfish animals who ever existed.

These days we have to look at whether she is RELATIVELY selfish (compared to other women in her league), because they are all pretty much selfish.

Be willing to walk at a minute's notice, and make her prove herself occasionally, otherwise you do a disservice to men worldwide by accepting, underwriting and thus standardizing her selfish behavior.

 

[bukowski_merit]

I know these are just example text messages but they are super lame.

example texts:
Me: How was your drive back? I had a really great time with you.
Her: Good, thanks I had a good time.
(notice SHE had a good time, not with me)

You're reaching really hard here! Who cares that she didn't say with you??? Who pays attention to stuff like this? Why send her such a text message? If you guys were laughing and flirting the whole time - you both already know you had a good time....

She doesn't have to say with you because it's implied! What a crazy thing to nitpick!

Me: Hope you had a happy easter
Her: I did thanks!
(notice she doesn't seem to care whether or not I did)

Why do you hope she had a happy easter? Where's Harry Wilmington? Because in this case - I agree 100% with him on texting killing relationships; except it's not all texting it's BORING text messages. You're hardly in a relationship with her - but jesus man... Show some wit... Be different from the other herd of men...

I'm not out on sarging missions or anything.

If you really want to understand women - there's no better way than to go on sarging missions.

finding women has never been a problem for me, but not getting treated like **** by them...well that's a whole other story.

It takes work and experience. Us telling you what to do is not going to teach you anything... Reading a few books over and over isn't going to teach you anything...

So as a first post on these forums my question to you guys is, would you continue to date a chick who is so painfully self-absorbed,

If I have fun with a woman and we fvck every time we're together - that's all that matters.

I don't try to do psychological examines on women, nor do I feel like they need to be done.

I treat a woman good as long as she's treating me good (and/or im still having fun with her). It's very simple... But then again, i don't trip when she doesn't respond the way I want her to to lame text messages (that i don't send).

not to mention I'm probably just one of many plates she's spinning, if it meant that down the road you might have a chance at sleeping with her? And of course being seen with her makes me the envy of all my friends, because she is like ridiculously hot. I am having a really hard time NEXTing her (due to her looks) but being with someone that is so vain is also a massive turnoff so it's a bit of quandary.

You think too much.

Less thinking... more action....

You are bordering on oneitis and you haven't even got your d!ck wet yet.... Scoring with her would probably be the worst thing to ever happen to you... Unless she smelled like a sewage plants down there, then that might be the best thing to ever happen to you :yes:


Have fun with women. Quit thinking so much; quit being a needball....

 

[Trump]

Here's the weird thing though, since that first date, we've already scheduled a second and we've been texting each other every few days, but I think it just hit me today...this chick is selfish as hell!

example texts:
Me: How was your drive back? I had a really great time with you.
Her: Good, thanks I had a good time.
(notice SHE had a good time, not with me)

Me: Hope you had a happy easter
Her: I did thanks!
(notice she doesn't seem to care whether or not I did)

These are just some of numerous examples from the last few weeks, and it's quite obvious from talking to her that she has an ego the size of a small planet, but why wouldn't she, I'm sure she's had years of reinforcement from guys complimenting her looks. Thing is, isn't it just human decency that if someone makes a pleasantry with you like "How are you today?" you would respond with something such as "Good. How are you?".

Bro you have been on one date with her, what did you want her to say to you? "I love you, I miss you, I can't live without you?" Come on, a girl who is hot hears the same thing everyday. If you want her to pay attention, differentiate yourself from the rest of the pack.

Second, you shouldn't be texting her unless its for a reason. To get a date, to ask for info, to tell her what to do. To text her anything emotional shows weaknesses. She is not going to put it in writing "I had a great time with you" so you can show all your friends a hot girl is in to you.

It is has nothing to do courtesy, it is about being vunerable.

 

[Dusoa]

Man, you guys are brutal! haha Nonetheless I do sincerely appreciate all the opinions.

Just to clarify a couple of things, those texts are very generic examples and definitely not verbatim, this is on the internet after all, one can never be too careful.

Also you are seeing them out of context. If she starts up some type of small talk with me through texting, I play by the rules...make her wait to receive the first response, don't seem too available, etc. etc. but I don't flat out ignore her either. So for example if we are texting back and forth on Easter, it only seems to make sense that at some point I would acknowledge the holiday, and conversely seems odd that she wouldn't do the same. Like I said, to me that doesn't have anything to do with IL, it's just good manners, really. Regardless, you'll just have to believe me when I say that while I'm not out actively playing the field, I'm very well versed in what I'm supposed to be doing and don't just send worthless texts or calls unless they are to arrange another date.

Otherwise though, you guys are totally 100% right.

This is a very new situation for me, I've always been kind of a relationship person, and have never really had trouble finding one. So to just get with someone and see where it goes is certainly an all new experience for me, and also exactly why I'm probably way over thinking things, because I've never been with someone like this. I certainly don't want to end up with oneitis, because that would basically turn this in to all my previous relationships, and that really isn't my goal here. I'm also trying to maintain frame, but admittedly really putting game in to practice like I'm currently attempting is much harder, and at times overwhelming, then I ever thought it would be just based on reading about it. I use tactics from it everyday in the way I carry myself in business, or conversation, and it's always served me well with flirting because I have a reasonably natural rapport with women. But this is totally different, understanding how her personality type operates can be very confusing. I think I'm going to go through with the second date, just to see where I can take it, and how (if at all) her personality seems to have changed, and will post the results here.

 

[Megaman XIV]

This came to mind
http://www.ratemymotivational.com/1...ht_now_somebody_somewhere_is_tired_of_putting

My 100th post!

Somebody may be tired of her sh*t, but how many somebodies are anxiously waiting to START putting up with her sh*t? Many.

 

[Zerro]

So many guys writing long posts on this when a simple "no" would suffice.

 

[VladPatton]

I say trust your initial gut instinct. This selfishness trait was noticed by you, therefor it bothers you. It doesn't matter how hot she is, if she's an aṣṣhole, it's a major turn-off. In fact, she's an aṣṣhole because she's hot. All those years of "you're so pretty, can I kiss your ass some more" made her this way. Knock her off her pedestal if you wanna keep her, or just move on.

 

[nroug7]

I play by the rules...

There's your problem.

 

[sambwoy]

Have fun with women. Quit thinking so much; quit being a needball....

I don't approach women I like, because I bare in mind that if she is a ***** to me, she can get away with it. I was bullied by girls at school because of my looks and hair colour and nobody would have been on my side if I took the law into my own hands.

I have therefore limited my expectations in life, because I accept that life is bleak.

 

[rearea]

All men have super selfish attitudes, egos and feel entitled to everything. Thats why I dont bother with men and think they are a waste of my time, unless I need sex.

Men are NEVER caring (only time they are they are just pretending to satisfy their own desires) at least women can be sometimes. If you are looking for a relationship where you arent viewed as chattel and are seen as a human being, you will find what you are looking for if youre a lesbian but not dating men.

 

[zinc4]

She has low IL...that is obvious...

 

[sharkbeat]

All men have super selfish attitudes, egos and feel entitled to everything. Thats why I dont bother with men and think they are a waste of my time, unless I need sex.

Men are NEVER caring (only time they are they are just pretending to satisfy their own desires) at least women can be sometimes. If you are looking for a relationship where you arent viewed as chattel and are seen as a human being, you will find what you are looking for if youre a lesbian but not dating men.

Sorry, what?

 

[nroug7]

Sorry, what?

She just admitted she was a slut but put up a barrier before admitting it.
Stupidity is rampant these days.