Would like input on convo today with 10

[Big Ballin]

Ok, I do tech support for a large company. A few weeks ago, we hired an amazingly beautiful girl. This girl is so hot all the guys have been all over her since she started. Now before you guys lecture me about going for girls at work, let me just make it clear that I am not seriously pursuing her. I'm only using her for practice and building confidence.

Anyways, she called me for help for the first time last week. I made friendly conversation and she seemed to dig me. After that she would call for small things and we would make chit-chat. Soon she started flirting with me a little, saying things like, "Oh, I wish you would move over and sit next to me permenantly", or "I was going IM you today because I wanted to talk to you". Now in my AFC days I would have been all over her trying to get her to like me. Not anymore. I decided to play it cool and send mixed messages. So all of last week I would purposely either ignored her when I saw her or I would say hi, talk for
about 5-10 minutes, then leave really fast before I wore out my welcome. I did this
repeatedly- give her the cold shoulder one minute, then tease her by giving her my full
attention for a little bit.

Well, this week I decided to test to see if it was working. I cut off all contact with her all week. I avoided her area and did not run into her for 4 days. Guess what? She IM's me today asking how I was doing and why I hadn't stopped by. I played it off, saying I was real busy and stuff. Eventually we IM'd for a little bit and here is the part that got me confused:

Me: So what did you do today?
Her: blah blah I bought the Lord of the Rings DVD today
Me: Oh yeah? Do you like fantasy movies?
Her: Yeah, I used to play Dungeons and Dragons when I was a kid
Me: Oh, you mean you used to be a nerd?

Her: I wouldn't talk if I were you, techie!
Me: You know I'm just teasing you
Her: I know, me too. Did I hurt your feelings? Are you crying right now?
Me: It takes a lot more to make me cry then that...

After that, I quickly changed the subject and moved on. It seems to me like she got pissed off when I called her a nerd and I'm not sure what she meant by her hurting my feelings. Did I come off sounding ok, or should I have done things differently? Any suggestions on what to say to her next time?

 

[StellarPKT]

I think you did just fine. I doubt that she got mad at you, it just sounds like you are more worried about it than you should be because she is hott. You know not to act like that, she should be treated the same as any other girl. This means you should not be overanalyzing everything you say to her.

What did she mean when she said she hurt your feelings? Duh, she was teasing you right back. I would have came back and said "Yes I am balling...why did you have to call me names?" Then again im a very sarcastic fvck.

So basically, you probably didn't piss her off but so what if you did? Thats her fault if she cant take a joke. And the last thing you said in your convo made it seem like you were trying to prove something, I would have kept up the teasing.

 

[hannibal82]

dont' sweat it , you're money baby

that was a *nice* neg about being a nerd ...like maybe she's really hot but in the back of her mind maybe she IS kind of self conscious about that .......PERFECT hehe..... nothing to worry about, this girl thinks you are money

------------------
"You....You're so money and you don't even know it.
-Trent from "Swingers"

 

[Welsh Employed]

Just sounds like two friends talking to me.

 

[hannibal82]

of course it does.........to the <raises eyebrow> ...un-aware hehehe

RTFB and start observing things and you will see what we're talking about

------------------
"You....You're so money and you don't even know it.
-Trent from "Swingers"

 

[Welsh Employed]

This could be two guys talking FFS.

 

[killerasp]

hey, awesome job. sound like it went well for you. i dont think she got mad, she was just teasing you as you were doing to her. its all in the name of fun.

 

[Ronin]

Yeah good job but it seems to me like your over-analizeing things. Don't worry about it she likes you, assume she dose especially after you neg hitted her.

Sean

------------------
Never foget your ABCs': Always Be Closing.

 

[Rev]

You shouldn't have backed off when she teased you back. It makes it sound like you have a weak sense of humor. It's no fun to tease someone who turns serious the way you did. But congrads on your nice work with this one.

 

[Don_juan]

You did great.... she's playing the game now. Lace up your dancing shoes and let the seduction dance begin my friend.

You're in, keep up all the challenge and don't get all mushy now because she likes you (she does).

 

[Marquez]

your give-attention-then-take-away strategy sounds effective. my analysis of the IM convo:

Originally posted by Big Ballin:
Me: So what did you do today?
Her: blah blah I bought the Lord of the Rings DVD today
Me: Oh yeah? Do you like fantasy movies?
Her: Yeah, I used to play Dungeons and Dragons when I was a kid
Me: Oh, you mean you used to be a nerd?

neg hit, not very strong since you implied she is not a nerd anymore.

Originally posted by Big Ballin:
Her: I wouldn't talk if I were you, techie!

she retaliates, but too hard, since she attacks your present situation.

Originally posted by Big Ballin:
Me: You know I'm just teasing you

now you are in nice guy mode, you start to explain yourself (= mild form of excuse)

Originally posted by Big Ballin:
Her: I know, me too. Did I hurt your feelings? Are you crying right now?

she makes fun of you, she thinks she found a button and tries to press it.

Originally posted by Big Ballin:
Me: It takes a lot more to make me cry then that...

good answer to make her stop that silly girly game.

she seems immature (see her reaction to your mild neg hit) and she is used to AFCs (who wonders?). don't excuse if she acts b!tchy.

Originally posted by Big Ballin:
Her: I wouldn't talk if I were you, techie!

You: Did I hurt your feelings?

i suggest, do not IM with her anymore. if she does, tell her to come over to your office. then ask if she would like to join you for a coffee break (don't pay for it, it's not a date, she is your co-worker).

 

[Simon Iff]

Originally posted by Rev:
You shouldn't have backed off when she teased you back. It makes it sound like you have a weak sense of humor. It's no fun to tease someone who turns serious the way you did. But congrads on your nice work with this one.

Very true. But you saved it with your last line:

Me: It takes a lot more to make me cry then that...

You put a stop to her teasing regained control. And as a bonus alluded to how brave you are, which is always a good thing to do! So I think it was totally positive and put you in an even better position. Good work!

 

[BMW]

So you got a pic of her?

 

[sustainable007]

Dude...this is baked

Im not buying your story a 10 doesnt play dungeon and dragons or watch lord of the rings....only a nerd does.

 

[killerasp]

what are you guys doing? This post died 5 months ago. Why are you posting something so irrelavant into it?