would going to see a psych help ( happy new years guys)

[Packers2010]

let's suppose you go see a therapist for a while and it works out for you, how will things be different then? what do you expect to have happened?

good question bro.

i want to have a " blank canvis @ in my mind. i want to be able to reboot it. uts let it go back to 0. instead of 194087598670935673097865

once there i will start to build up my brain again.

that's what i wanted to happen last week.

this week after taking a look at this thread. maybe it's just better if i leave it how it is and just ignore it? i mean. it's not bad, i though it would help me open up my mind more. but after talking to myself and see i can get there myself.

 

[flashpoint]

good question bro.

i want to have a " blank canvis @ in my mind. i want to be able to reboot it. uts let it go back to 0. instead of 194087598670935673097865

once there i will start to build up my brain again.

that's what i wanted to happen last week.

this week after taking a look at this thread. maybe it's just better if i leave it how it is and just ignore it? i mean. it's not bad, i though it would help me open up my mind more. but after talking to myself and see i can get there myself.

u could try a little thought experiment here. like imagine there is a blank screen right in front of you. you can put it whereever you feel comfortable with it so you have a good vision. then turn down the light until there is nothing more than the screen visible, like a whiteboard for your mind.

now you start rebuilding what you think is supposed to be in there. you can put things in, take em out, move em around, make them bigger, smaller, bright, dark, whatever you like. it is like trying out what it would be like to have that counter reset to zero. and the choice would be all yours. you rebuild that thing as much as you like until you think your done.

the interesting question again is once you have successfully rebuild your brain, how will things be different then? how will you notice that they are? what do you see as the first small sign, that tells you "ya that did work quite well, didnt it".



a variation could be to do something similar but purposefully start with things that you like about yourself and your life, doesnt have to be big stuff more these little things you might not usually notice while they are there, but surely miss when they are gone. maybe keep a journal about that for a while, so you dont miss anything. then think or ask about what others might like about you and your life, again from small to big. explore both a little bit. finally look for what you like to have in your life building upon that. these are the challenges you will be going for then. step by step.

 

[ebracer05]

I think some perspective could help you but I don't know that you need to see a psychiatrist. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who prescribes medicine for psychiatric disorders. Unless you think you have a psychiatric disorder that needs medical therapy, I wouldn't go because whatever medication he would prescribe you has the potential to make your recovery that much more difficult. If you told all of that to a psychiatrist, the potential is there to end up an an agent like Seroquel, which I do not think will help you.

I think there is a lot of merit in what Bradd told you - these sorts of problems are best worked out on your own. If you are going to see any sort of a mental health professional, find a psychologist or a counselor, preferably someone that someone you know who is in a healthy emotional state can vouch for. There are a lot of lousy mental health professionals. That being said, if you are ready to pony up a minimum of $40 per hour for these services, it would do you some good to spend some time trying to work this out yourself.

A third party will never have the same vested interest in your well being that you do. I'll make a few observations that I want you to think very hard on and answer seriously and completely:

my home life isn't great and to say my Christmas was good. is like saying romro can throw a football. he can't. there are so many goals i won't to complete this year, though right now i don't feel as well as i want to mentally. ( mainly because i went to see that girls I've been texting. it didn't go well though it didn't go bad i don' think. i need to be more aggressive. )

Why is your home life so bad?

What goals didn't you accomplish and why do think you you didn't?

Why have you made a main component of your mental state contingent upon a girl you barely know... and why aren't you being more aggressive?


there are 2 sides to me right now. the one that pours out for attention like this. IE post this thread. and the one who says just get on with the fookin job. there as been so many threads i would have maid though this second personality kicks in and says it's not worth it.

It's hard to "get on with the job" when you are in the midst of a battle with your self. You cannot win the war with others if you have not already won it with yourself. Do you think a two front war sounds like a good idea?

Why do you think you have a side to yourself that craves attention so? Attention is a form of validation from others, so why do you seek that validation and why do you think you need it? Don't you think you have what it takes to find what you're looking for, or do you believe you will never find it alone? Be careful with this one and don't give the answer you think is right or that we want to hear, give the answer that is true for you right now. Are you seeking fulfillment internally or externally?

it's so hard to explain. i sit here hung over, annoyed i went to see the girl i am fall for ( yeah, i need to get more girls) and i'm pissed i never kissed her. sure i don't think the opportunity came up last night, but i could have just grabbed her and done it, but i didn't. it's like, " i don't know how" but when you think about it it's easy. you walk up to her grab her face and kiss her.... so why is it so hard?

You are battling yourself. "I should have just dont it". "The opportunity didn't come". "I'm p*ssed". "I should have". I should have. I should have. I should have.

When will you finally do it?

Not to add insult to injury, but do you see what you are doing here? Successes definitely synergize but so do failures. Every time you have something in your head that you want to do, like make a move on the girl, and you don't, you have only further trapping yourself in this pattern of behavior.

Do you have any idea why this is so hard for you? Do you have experiences in your past you need to resolve?

I've had an easy life, and everything I need ( food shelter clothing and few extras on the side) has been given to me. i feel bad, becuse i WANT to go sort this out, but i always feel like I am a poosy for doing so. like my problems are nothing. it's just me being less of a man or something... i'm not quite sure.

An easy life can be a Godsend for some and a liability for others. It was a liability for me. You have probably not had to work quite so hard for things and developed some lazy patterns, which is why you find it hard to "get the stones" to do things like make a move with a girl. In your life, have you had to do things that have been very hard and stretched you to your core very often? For some people, experiences like that are their life. That is how my father grew up and probably why he never had the issues I had growing up as a doctor's son... he had to literally fight for almost everything in life and I didn't have to do much at all.

You will also never find a resolution to any of your issues if you are minimizing them. So stop doing that. Don't dramatize them, but if they are causing you distress, accept it.

i don't really have anyone i can talk to about this stiff. my folks are kicking off here and i am in the middle, my dad is an alcoholic. my mum just dose most of her things out of spite and is annoying as hell. i really would like to just press ctrl alt del and find the escape key. it's too much for me. everything too much for me it's so pathetic. like i have a good life. i mean everything is handed to me. the ONLY thing i have ever had to work for is my cert 3 in financial services. witch i got! i'm so proud of myself.

You won't find the answers to your problems with alcohol - you are actually risking turning in to your father. Stop it.

You may have had a good life in a way, but if your parents act out, that is a liability that is not trivial. Why haven't you left home? If you did, it would provide a challenge for you (you would stop having things handed to you and have to fight for things) and you would not have your parents dragging your state down. Are they really so bad? If they are, what will you do?

And why aren't you focusing on what you are doing right, like your cert 3? I don't know what that is, but it sounds good!

I've always been told i am a P.O.S from every one in high school, to my mother on a dial basis. since school was so crazy ( teacher fooking the class over) i haven't had time to think. i'm on 6 week holidays. so straight after the stress of school i found a depression witch i haven't felt since i was 16. it was pretty alarming. i spent a week staying up all night till the dawn and watching skins. ( don't ask me why i don't know why it was skins, though i really felt for the char. in that show)

i think i NEED to go so i can get my head right, it hasn't been right for a long time. i know that, if i'm going to make the lofty goals i have set myself for this year, ( will post them up later in a different thread. ) then i will have to get my mind right so it can focus on the task at hand. not trying to to wort out the mess that's up there.

i just want to be stronger mentally because when i come it comes to **** tests, I'm failing them pretty bad right now. maybe i just need to have 1000 of them so i have the reference exp. but being more mentally sane right now can't hurt.

we was coming home from the casino last night in a taxi, i was next to the girl I've been texting and i pointed to one of the tall bank buildings. i said " i'm going to be working at the top of one of those one day" i smiled when i said it. it made me feel good. just to say it out allowed. i'm smiling right now as i say it.

I used to walk through downtown Cleveland with whoever my girl was and point to skyscrapers and say "one day I'm going to own a building like that". I believed it.

You will really start to lose in life if you ever stop dreaming like that. You may never own the building, but you will surely never own it if you stop trying to.

i know this is one hell of a crazy rant, but my question is do you think it would be worth the money being spent on going to see a psych? I've been to one in school, only because they made me. it wasn't for very long and i hated it. ( the person i saw was Russian and i hated her. ) maybe if i mind the right person it might work out.

Go on amazon and buy a very cheap little book by Dr. Paul Hauck called Hold your Head up High. It's less than $10 I think and after going to see 2 counselors, 2 psychologists, and 2 psychiatrists over about 5 or 6 years, it's pretty much what you will hear from talking to them. I found that the value in people like that was the perspective they have to offer you, which is something a good male mentor can do for you. There are guys on this board who can give you solid advice like that. I can point them to you if you PM me. Some guys will give you awful advice... and some will give you a mixture.

I would honestly buy that book, read it very seriously, and reflect and respond to the points I made. Let me know if you have any further questions.

 

[Packers2010]

fashpoint. you make a good point.

though, what happened is i fell off the waggon as it was going.

i've been texting this girl for a while now, and I've always siad i don't care if i loose her. but every time i say that. i feel NEED AS ****.

it's ****ed. i shouldn't care because i already KNOW SHE IS ATTRACTED TO ME she told me!

my point is.

A) i'm not going to the club enough
B) i'm not going to the club enough
c) i text her a little to much.
d) she live far away but i am going to make her come out next week,
e) tomorrow night i am going to the club WITHOUT FAIL
f) i am going to watch . read as much as i can about game. ( every time i do i learn something new and i get anothe " click"
G) i need to go to the gym and get ripped
H) i need to learn how to get ripped
J) i am a little *****
K) i suck at game BECAUSE i don't go out enough
L) I WILL go to the club 2 nights a week, even if i have to walk there
M) I don't think i need help. i need to STOP being a ***** and start taking action!
N) i have blown so many chances in live because i never took action, i will blow no more!
O) I will read all the book i got last year and read them in the first Quart of the year! 5 books in total
P) I will start my cause work early
Q) I will make a song in FL studio 10
R) I will stop wasting days like i did today
S) I will start listening to motivation talk when i wake up
T) I will Find a job
U) I will move out of this ****ty house this year
V) I will get my self where i need to go
W)I won't accept NO for an answer
x) My fire WILL BURN
Y) i'm going to get better at English
Z) i'm going to learn welsh
1) yes it was necessary to post this.

 

[zinc4]

hey man, have you ever heard of Qigong? it's basically standing mediation exercises and been around for thousands of years in China and is very powerful... has done wonders for many people with depression and has helped me a lot with a bad sleep problem and brain fog....there are many different kinds of qigong and if you are in a big city, a good teacher for your specific problems should be easy to find even in the states.....phychiatrists and meds are all short cuts for stuff that we can do naturally....some crucial cases of course each is needed...but you CAN fix yourself...

 

[Packers2010]

all answers are in bold

Why is your home life so bad?

i don't have a room in the house i am staying at. nor do i have a bed or even a fookin wardrobe. i have a small rack where my clothes go and 1 draw to house my crap another to house my underwear.

my folks HATE each other. there not together anymore haven't been for years but they live in the same house. the tension in this sounds can be cut with a knife. it's like that ALL THE TIME. then you will hear one yell at the other about paying bills. the house looks feels and is a POS. no one will clean it or do anything because the other is leaving here. Perth ( where i live) just went threw the hottest heat wave in 40 years. my dad wouldn't turn on the AC because he wanted to fave move on power. got yelled at the other day because my mother asked me to leave the room so she could make a call. so i move to the lounge sit down and start watching tv with my computer in front of me. dad walks in the room and yells at me to pick one or the other. i was only out there because i was told to go there. the house is really small.


What goals didn't you accomplish and why do think you you didn't?

I haven't even started the goals i want to for this year. i guess it was a jump at that.

Why have you made a main component of your mental state contingent upon a girl you barely know... and why aren't you being more aggressive?

I've been told " no" be every living person i know. in one form or another. so i guess after awhile you just think that " no" is ok. I'm also scared of loosing the girl in some form or another. but today i released, if the girl is attracted how can you loose her?

i also don't believe i have the skill to get the girl. i mean why would she pick me?

It's hard to "get on with the job" when you are in the midst of a battle with your self. You cannot win the war with others if you have not already won it with yourself. Do you think a two front war sounds like a good idea?

lets go to battle man!

Why do you think you have a side to yourself that craves attention so? Attention is a form of validation from others, so why do you seek that validation and why do you think you need it? Don't you think you have what it takes to find what you're looking for, or do you believe you will never find it alone? Be careful with this one and don't give the answer you think is right or that we want to hear, give the answer that is true for you right now. Are you seeking fulfillment internally or externally?

this is a hard one...

i want it because it's all i know. I've always been told to have it. the only reason i know of this is because Tyler RSD told me. It stems from not believing in me or the things i do. i can feel it when I open girls, it feel like i'm giving 40% because that's all i fee i am worth.

the about if times people have told me. " what" or " excuse me" because they can't hear what i am saying is redic

i crave attention because I've never been in the spotlight before. i have a school dvd some film kids did for my high graduation. i'm not in it... well.. you hear my voice say "sevens" while i'm playing cards with the guy getting interviewed.

I just want to be told i'm " good boy" i think i've only ever heard it from anyone twice in my hold life. maybe 3 times. ( as i write this i have a smile on my face remembering the 3rd time) that is the REAL reason.

You are battling yourself. "I should have just dont it". "The opportunity didn't come". "I'm p*ssed". "I should have". I should have. I should have. I should have.

When will you finally do it?

next time i see her. i have a blind rage towards her now. she is either coming out to see me this weekend. or i delete her number.

Not to add insult to injury, but do you see what you are doing here? Successes definitely synergize but so do failures. Every time you have something in your head that you want to do, like make a move on the girl, and you don't, you have only further trapping yourself in this pattern of behavior.

Do you have any idea why this is so hard for you? Do you have experiences in your past you need to resolve?

if you mean with not making a move on girls, sure i have plenty.

i also remember kissing my sister when i was 5 more then once. and under a bed. so lets go with that shall we


An easy life can be a Godsend for some and a liability for others. It was a liability for me. You have probably not had to work quite so hard for things and developed some lazy patterns, which is why you find it hard to "get the stones" to do things like make a move with a girl. In your life, have you had to do things that have been very hard and stretched you to your core very often? For some people, experiences like that are their life. That is how my father grew up and probably why he never had the issues I had growing up as a doctor's son... he had to literally fight for almost everything in life and I didn't have to do much at all.

I've alwyas had my basic needs taken care of so i will say yet to that question. though, it's always been my basic needs. i don't really know what hardship is. i guess.

You will also never find a resolution to any of your issues if you are minimizing them. So stop doing that. Don't dramatize them, but if they are causing you distress, accept it.
You won't find the answers to your problems with alcohol - you are actually risking turning in to your father. Stop it.

i have stopped doing both thing you have mentioned. i looked in my wallet today and saw i lost my bank card. so they are both GONE!


You may have had a good life in a way, but if your parents act out, that is a liability that is not trivial. Why haven't you left home? If you did, it would provide a challenge for you (you would stop having things handed to you and have to fight for things) and you would not have your parents dragging your state down. Are they really so bad? If they are, what will you do?

i guess you have never lived in Perth. the " average rental house price per week" is $450 minimum wage is just over $500. you do the math. it's FOOKING IMPOSSIBLE to move out of home. I only know of 1 guy who has moved out with his gf and i never see the guy becuse he lives so far away and he works so much. ( that and i went to his engagement party and was so drunk i think i told his gf's parents to go fook themselves. though this is second hand information)

i'm not scared of not having this handed to me. I WANT to be on my own. i can have PURE freedom at last. i can finally start eating healthy ( i don't buy the food) and start to do thing on my terms. i can't " just get a job" because i have no skills to bump me up into the higher earnings bracket. so once i complete 6 months of school this year i will be able to do that once i get a job.

And why aren't you focusing on what you are doing right, like your cert 3? I don't know what that is, but it sounds good!

thanks. i'm not working on it because i have finished it. it's summer holidays over here. i don't start school again until feb 2. having a cert 3 is the into level to accounting. mean i can work as a bank teller lol next step is book keeping.

I used to walk through downtown Cleveland with whoever my girl was and point to skyscrapers and say "one day I'm going to own a building like that". I believed it.

You will really start to lose in life if you ever stop dreaming like that. You may never own the building, but you will surely never own it if you stop trying to.

so do i man! whats funny is at the time, i kind of felt like i want her to come along with me. but i know that's not going to happen. plus my goal is to have hoes in area codes.

 

[flashpoint]

wow. that is kind of a surprise that you would say your life is so easy and all, then you reveal that you basically have no place in your own home. that SUXXXX. and since you guys live so close together you get much of the heat that is building up between the two as well. that just has to wear you down.

finding a job seems paramount. once you got some money of your own, things will be much easier. and do your best at school. with all that dating and going out and so, well ... take it from an old fart: you r still very young, lots of years to come, lots of girls, lots of opportunities to take or miss. Now you can build the foundation for the next 20 years and you can take your time for that. just do it with purpose and determination.

AND you already have a girl. kind of. dont chase the things you already have, that is just silly (i made that mistake more than once so ...). anyway good luck. lots of frustration=lots of power to be released.

 

[Packers2010]

wow. that is kind of a surprise that you would say your life is so easy and all, then you reveal that you basically have no place in your own home. that SUXXXX. and since you guys live so close together you get much of the heat that is building up between the two as well. that just has to wear you down.

finding a job seems paramount. once you got some money of your own, things will be much easier. and do your best at school. with all that dating and going out and so, well ... take it from an old fart: you r still very young, lots of years to come, lots of girls, lots of opportunities to take or miss. Now you can build the foundation for the next 20 years and you can take your time for that. just do it with purpose and determination.

AND you already have a girl. kind of. dont chase the things you already have, that is just silly (i made that mistake more than once so ...). anyway good luck. lots of frustration=lots of power to be released.

yeah ****s fooked up.. i'll be getting money soon enough, just got another 6 months of this B.S

i'm not too sure about that girl. so i just texted her and invited her out tonight. then if she says no, then i'll just go nc for awhile.

ilast week she was all on my ****. this one no so much so maybe it was me. i hardly texted her the past few days. maybe i just lost my jazz.

either way today we will find out. i might just call her out on her B.S i'm sick of her playing games. this hard to get bs.

EDIT BELOW!

i told the girl i've been texting i wouldn't chase her anymore ( i was pissed off :S ) so now i am gong nc. unless she sends sexting messages. ( cos i like sexting) or it's for a meet up. other then that i am done.

I'm going to make this my improvement journal. and just post my thoughts in here now. i will change the first post and the title. and ask a mod to change the title to:

packers 2013 journal.

so if a mod see this please change it thanks.