Women that initiate and pursue you first

[Knight's Cross]

OK,
So I've had about 0 luck with women that pursue me. So I'll put the topic out there for all to comment on their own experiences with this. I've found I always have better luck if I initiate the pursuit. If a woman asks for my #, out for drinks etc, it's always ends bad.
Sure they could just see you as a high value guy, but I've found the chicks that ask me out all wind up being dead ends. Latest woman that's asked me for #, time to spend with her is a fitness writer, personal trainer, and previous job was psychologist. She initiated the start of this by asking for my #, and has asked to get together sunday. We'll head to the beach for a couple hours. Hey at least I'll get to enjoy her rock hard body in a bikini. However I'm leaning towards another plate right now that I had to pursue. Put them side by side, and the fitness trainer seems a better candidate for being a steady girl. The fact that she's in harder pursuit of me, drops my IL.
Probably stemming from my track record with women that put on a full court press.
So my SS Brethren, what say ye? How many of you have had good relationships with women that obviously pursued you from the start?

KC

 

[Blackmm]

All of the women who ever pursued me had some sort of catch to them (Overweight, too many kids, average as ****).

Unless money is involved, most above average to hot chicks with no kids will never initiate pursuing a guy. There is simply no reason for them to do so since scores of other guys are already hitting her up.

 

[Boilermaker]

^
While being in complete agreement with your hypothesis ( ... that attractive women will never pursue), I disagree with the cause ( ... that there are always scores of other guys in her hands).

This is an assumption we readily make; but I don't think it's correct. First of all, the majority of betas orbiting around an attractive woman, is not worth pursuing anyway. Because most men don't have a clue. That makes potential candidates even more valuable. On the other hand, when a suitable candidate shows up, every once in a blue moon, women cannot bring themselves to pursue even if they really want an interaction, simply because they have never had to do that, in their long evolutionary history. (And honestly I wouldn't want any attractive woman to be aggressive and come after me it just doesn't feel right). Most of the time people's apparent choices and behavior are not necessarily in accordance with their true intentions as most of us are suffering within our imaginary boundaries; too afraid to step out and take a shot. We are highly conditioned to do so, the reasons of which could be a separate discussion.

This is a very important point because usually thinking that there's always fierce competition with hordes of other candidates for the same plate adds to the pursuer's anxiety; causing him to underrate his own value and overrate the woman's.

I am more careful accepting that premise these days and I believe it has improved my game.

 

[Lexington]

I don't think that women who pursue you should be dismissed out of hand. Sometimes, the planets align just right and things just work out your way. For whatever reason a really attractive woman may just find you to be very cute. Maybe you remind her of her father, maybe your vibe just syncs with hers. It's not common, but it can happen. Most of the best women I've ever been with were ones that I had to initiate with. But a couple of times, really good ones just practically fell into my lap.

 

[thedude4242]

I have women pursue me all the time. doesnt end up getting me any. probably something I might be doing wrong but what if I fit a mold of guys that fvck women over and they want to get back at me. so many men have to pull teeth to talk to women. I talk to women all the time but it doesnt get me anywhere, so I just figure she is another flake. I have good looking women pursue me all the time. they stare and check me out.

 

[Colossus]

There is something about a challenge that keeps men (and women) interested. Likely the reason why the ones who pursue you never work out is your interest just isnt there when the pickings are easy. I know that the harder and more fervently a girl pursues me, the less interested I am. That doesnt mean I want the opposite, but there has to be a healthy tag-you're-it balance.

Sometimes women with less desirable attributes like kids or weight issues will pursue men harder, by necessity. But--for me anyways--I really think the issue is that the challenge is completely removed when I'm being pursued completely.

 

[Tazman]

honestly I wouldn't want any attractive woman to be aggressive and come after me it just doesn't feel right

It doesn't feel right because it generally doesn't happen, atleast to the average guy.

I guarantee you though, if you were being pursued by one you'd still give it a go, if nothing else to see where it would end.

It never fails, the more attractive the woman, the less effort she puts into making her feelings about you known. The most I've gotten from somewhat cute girls was some light kino and that was after hanging out in groups.

The most aggressive encounters have been women that were lower on the scale then I was willing to try, with the exception of a few cute ones that happened after some drinking was involved.

 

[leeraconteur]

It has happened to me once in 34 years. During that brief 18 month period in the early 80s, girls would ask guys out. August, 1984.

That was it. One girl, one time, one date.

Other than that incident, I had to do all the work always.

I hear other guys tell me, in person and online, about this mythical principle that 'Women chase, men don't' and I really have no idea what planet these guys are living on.

If I don't pursue women, I can guarantee you the outcome:

Nothing.

Nothing will happen. Forever. For a decade. For years.

If I wait, I will be waiting until I die. It's just not gonna ever happen with me.

 

[PokerStar]

wow this just happened to me yesterday.

back story:

Chilling at a beach party yesterday, having a few beers with my friends. Then all of a sudden some cute little thing came up to us.

"hi my name is nicole, i would like to meet new people"

thats what she said, no hesitation, none what so ever.

I was kinda buzzing at the moment and said to myself, hey why not, this could be fun.

I get up off of my seat and proceeded to get my macdaddy on. I was negging, kinoing, push pull you name it. asking about her relationship with her mother and especially her father. (she sounded very close to them)

It was like my game was at 110%.

then I just kissed her.

I just looked away right after, didnt say anything, just smirked. I wanted her to marinate in her own juices for a few moments.

The she blurts out "give me your number"

In my time i have never had something come so easy to me within 15 minutes of meeting someone.

We did exchange our numbers and I will give her a call or at least a text this week. maybe not to set up something but maybe to say "hey, it was awesome meeting you the other day"