Women have too much control over my thoughts.

[satelliteparties]

I know this totally goes against what the forum is about...but for me, I'm sick of the power women have over my daily thoughts...just because they look good.

The quest to lose the V-card (I've done everything else...tit play, fingering, oral) has taken over me, almost like Mulder from X-Files like quest for the "truth."

I think part of me also wants to prove to myself that I can attract a high caliber woman (6 plus) again and finish the deal with her. (I went all clingy on the girl I fooled around with which led to her dumping me before the sex...this was years ago.)

But it's like, it's taken over my life and daily thought and mood. I was put on light meds for my mood and anxiety...it completely got rid of any perverted thoughts I was having, but I still obsess about meeting women just as much even though I'm not masturbating.

And yes, I have hobbies...and that's the problem...I can't concentrate on them because of the frustration over the V-card.

I have no idea how I'm going to lose it unless I were to bang an UG or fattie or warpig (and I'm not UG...work out, dress nice etc...just not really attractive or have any game.)

That's another thing...I believe if you're socially awkward, game isn't something you can acquire. You can improve your social skills to a degree, which I have...like not shake/stutter/sweat...but as far as having "game" you either have "it" or you don't. Even those who learned it had it in them all along, they just didn't know it.

Anyway...I'm wondering if this gets better after the V card is over? I hear two schools of thought on here...one being that sex is overrated...two being the majority of guys on here that spend their every waking breath trying to get laid or getting laid like it's the second coming of Christ.

 

[TheJazz]

Screw the V-Card. There's more to life than women. Vaginas are not lined with gold, my friend. Keep your virginity. It's a prize. Losing it won't do a damn thing besides screw you up even more. If you have sex, I bet you're going to get addicted and go on a raping spree. It's not worth it. I'm probably going to get flamed for this, but you need to focus on your life. Away with women, away with the V-Card, away with all the seduction garbage. Focus on YOUR LIFE. Can't get women or sex out of your mind? Go to sex addict intervention or get a shrink or something. It's just another problem that needs to be solved. And having sex isn't the answer. Don't feed the beast.

 

[TheZone]

yea.. it's the reason why I got into spirituality. Virginity is such a rut. It's almost a lose-lose situation. Because what are you going to do without a female, masturbate? Masturbation is a complete WASTE. Plus it sucks. The only way to be without a woman is to be spiritual IMO, and keep that essence. The only way to successfully keep that essence is to transmute that sexual energy with Great Work. This means, cultivation. Spiritual, and physical cultivation. Not to dissipate the sexual energy though but to channel it into something else, that may or may not attract women to you. Otherwise it'll manifest through unhealthy masturbation.

Spirituality doesn't have to mean becoming new agey or soft. It means personal development.

Like me.. it all began with self improvement, which lead me to energy work, taoism, qigong, martial arts, meditation, tibetan buddhism, atma vichara and advaita vedanta. Well that's just me.

You can choose any other things to get into like working out a lot, doing good in your school, etc. It can be hard though, and that's why I chose the spiritual path because the regular physical stuff wasn't really doing much to help me with my sexual urge. Many spiritual paths have exercises/techniques which help to channel the sexual energy. It's not to dissipate, nor to supress, because later on as you build up this purer/refined sexual energy you can use it to achieve goals and/or have higher quality sex which continues on.

 

[satelliteparties]

That's the funny thing, since I was put on the meds about two months ago, I haven't masturbated...and my so-called "dirty" fantasies went away...but I still think about women 24/7.

As for getting obsessed with sex...it could go either way. I get no feeling out of head (have had it from a few different women)...the other foreplay, even with the HB I dated, I could take it or leave it...good don't get me wrong, but completely overrated (she was thin and had huge cans too.)

So I guess the hope was that I have the intercourse and think "that's it? that's what I've been waiting my whole life for?"

As for it being a prize, I agree. To a lot of men on this site it might not be a "prize"...especially for those who lost it at like age 15...but if I wanted to, i could bang an UG4 or fattie right now...women earn me, not the other way around.

 

[thevilittletroll]

let me just tell you that game can be learned. just like any other sport, the more practice you get, the better you will become. its much easier in todays information age then it was 10 years ago. at least now we have the ability to share info and the "rules". before it was all just trial and error. i recommend reading books on game, women's psych, and sites like this that share info. learn to become more social first. as far as your v-card, lose your mentality that sex is important. once sex becomes not a big deal to you it much easier to get laid. it is an attractive quality that women look for in a man.

 

[Kal_Luke]

Sex is just something. It's not the be all and end all. This is very embarrassing but I was 18 when I lost my virginity to a 7 she had a bf at the time. We were banging for a couple of months but then it got shut down- but that's another story. Well the embarrassing part is that it was over a year before I had sex again. So I was nearly twenty hahaha. But yeah, I was still happy and had lots of fun. It's probably just something to get out of the way. Sex is not a magical or special thing, it is a bodily function like peeing or puking. Women themselves and the relationships you have with them is magical- obviously they'd better put out.

 

[Alle_Gory]

I'm sick of the power women have over my daily thoughts...just because they look good.

Women have no control over your thoughts. You simply have no discipline and cannot focus. Your thoughts are all over the place and I'm assuming you have no control over your emotions as well.

Meditate and take up a sport. Learn to control and focus your mind.

 

[satelliteparties]

What bothers me is, I can tell you what it's like to date a woman that's your type...to kiss a woman that's your type...to feel a pair of big breasts...to finger a girl...to get head. To spend the whole day with a girl and kiss her goodbye in your or her car at the end. To not be judged by an attractive woman and liked for who you are, and be able to talk about nearly anything.

I can't tell you what it's like to put my d*ck in the pvssy of a girl I'm the slightest bit attracted to.

It's something you need to experience for yourself.

You can say all you want "Sex isn't this big deal" but unless YOU know for sure, words are pointless, especially when society tells you otherwise and the world is constructed around a "sex sells" society...like penetrating a girl is the best thing of all time.

In fact, I ran into an old friend a few years ago...the first thing he asks me, not how am I doing, not how's the family...but "You get laid yet?"

I have another friend that remembers the exact day, year, and time he lost his virginity...said it was the best day of his life.

So I want to see what the big deal is. I'd pay an escort at this point (as you're paying with time anyway unless you're some super hunky guy that women voluntarily use for sex and nothing else)...but would have no idea how to go about it, and tend to prefer 6-7-8s over HB11s anyway.

 

[bigneil]

Yes it's called Testosterone.

But you're in your prime at age 26-31. Keep improving.

 

[OC Speedball]

I had a friend that gave/got oral when he was 15, but then didn't lose it till he was 18. I guess it's not that uncommon. Don't feel bad. Don't think about it.

And you think a 6 is a high caliber woman? 5 is average, and 6 is slightly above average. Not a big deal, just thought it was interesting. I think 9s and 10s are high caliber.

 

[satelliteparties]

I'm a kind 5/6, even with my newfound athletic body (women don't like my face...have called it ugly, scary, creepy etc...not all women, but a majority)...so for me, I'd gladly take a 6/7 (that I was attracted to)...they tend to be more modest and down to earth anyway.

That's what's frustrating, it's not like I'm holding out for a model or a girl way out of my league. It's just that even a female 6/7 can get male 10s just because they have a pvssy.

 

[OC Speedball]

I'd gladly take a 6/7 (that I was attracted to)...they tend to be more modest and down to earth anyway.

That's what's frustrating, it's not like I'm holding out for a model or a girl way out of my league. It's just that even a female 6/7 can get male 10s just because they have a pvssy.

I agree with you. Especially where I live girls tend to have HUGE egos. I go for 6s to 8s. Maybe when I get better with my DJ skills I will start going for the 9s and such, but as I said, their egos can be crazy. Although there are some girls that are grade A that are very friendly. There are always exceptions.

The worst is when an average girl talks about her standards, and they are totally unrealistic. I even called out one girl who was a 5 when she started talking about how "the hottest guy" wanted her to be his girlfriend. "Wow, you're a little full of yourself," I said. Such is the way of girls in California.

It would be interesting to start a thread where people post pics of different girls and give them ratings. Because even though there are definitely ugly girls and hot girls, everyone's view of beauty is slightly different. There was one guy who posted a pic of what he considered 9s... but I thought they were all 7s, maybe one was an 8. Some people said it was a good example of 9s, and others disagreed.

 

[satelliteparties]

http://images.search.yahoo.com/sear...p=kathleen robertson&fr2=tab-web&fr=yfp-t-701

 

[satelliteparties]

I'd like it all behind me asap (asap meaning within the next few months) so when my life situation is different, and I want/and am in the situation for a serious girlfriend, I at least know "I've had intercourse before" in my mind, and maybe later on in the relationship, can joke with her about the struggle of losing the V card...and she'd at least appreciate that I took care of it before I met her.

I'm not in any position for a serious girlfriend right now on any front. I could be moving within the next year (and hopefully will be), I'm going through a transition phase in my life in general, and I kind of like being single anyway (minus the not getting booty.)

I'd just like a night in bed with a woman my type sexually and to go from there.

Bars don't do any good...I'm nerdy looking (even with my athletic body and good style) and I don't get checked out in general anywhere I go.

My friend doesn't know I'm a virgin but has volunteered to go sarging with me (he's taken too so no need to compete over the same women) so maybe that's a start.

It's funny, really, because my sexual standards and dating standards are two different things. The woman I linked (Kathleen Robertson who's most known for playing Clare, Steve's girlfriend on the original 90210) is the kind I'd like to date and kind of like the couple girls I dated in terms of vibe.

Sexually, I'd just like a sleazy looking hot girl with a nice ass.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

You can be as ugly as a bat but still take pride in your appearance. Stop thinking about losing your v-card and worry more about getting dates or "hangouts" with a girl.

For me personally I'd take a girl on a date if I could see any type of relationship with her. If not then I refuse to take a girl on a date. I'd call them for the "hang-out". For you I think the best thing you can do is take girls on date. Basically "Pay" them to spend time with you. A lot more girls will bite that hook. I'm not trying to put you down or something but your game isn't there yet.

Focus on asking girls out. Quit thinking about losing your virginity. I do admit that everytime I meet a girl I do think about smashing them but I know that once I have them isolated "hang-out, date", that they will "like me" and eventually give it up to me.

Get confidence and show it to the girls. Your the prize. The best thing she can give you is pu$$y. The best thing you can give her is the world.

 

[satelliteparties]

Hangout or date...it's all semantics. When I'm with a girl and she's receptive, I can talk to her fine, escalate fine, at least foreplay wise. The problem is finding a girl that is attracted to my looks. I'm not ugly per-se, but I have a weird looking face that sometimes (not always) rubs women the wrong way.

One of the problems is that since my first girlfriend, I've been relying way too much on free online dating sites, pof especially. I did to my credit meet the second girl, who I went on a few dates with in December, on okcupid (we had similar personalities, got along great, but she had a kid that took up her time and I didn't want to be second string so we called it off after a few dates.) But on pof, I've been building up rejection after rejection, from women that aren't even half as attractive as my first girlfriend.

It's just amazing on there...a 6 thinks she's like a 10 and will insult you for no reason.

I'm at least finally beginning to ween off the site and try to approach in person.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Of course girls on the internet are going to think there dimes even if there ugly. Go out there and approach.

 

[OC Speedball]

Hangout or date...it's all semantics. When I'm with a girl and she's receptive, I can talk to her fine, escalate fine, at least foreplay wise. The problem is finding a girl that is attracted to my looks. I'm not ugly per-se, but I have a weird looking face that sometimes (not always) rubs women the wrong way.

One of the problems is that since my first girlfriend, I've been relying way too much on free online dating sites, pof especially. I did to my credit meet the second girl, who I went on a few dates with in December, on okcupid (we had similar personalities, got along great, but she had a kid that took up her time and I didn't want to be second string so we called it off after a few dates.) But on pof, I've been building up rejection after rejection, from women that aren't even half as attractive as my first girlfriend.

It's just amazing on there...a 6 thinks she's like a 10 and will insult you for no reason.

I'm at least finally beginning to ween off the site and try to approach in person.

Dude POF is brutal. I used to use it when I was a major AFC, before I got into this stuff. The ratio of guys to girls is probably 8 to 1.

I've found that I can get a number from about 50% of girls I talk to. (Ones that I talk to in real life). That doesn't mean I go out with all of them, but what it does mean is that girls like a guy who can hold a conversation (serious). They are very responsive to that. At least go out and make friends with girls, that is what I am doing right now because I'm still a newbie.

What I've learned is that kino is probably the most powerful tool in talking to women. But when you do it make sure you keep eye contact with them when you touch them. That way it looks natural. It works wonders. Before I got into this stuff I would NEVER touch girls, and I would never get phone numbers.

Best of luck.

 

[satelliteparties]

This whole sex thing seems like a big hassle. What I mean is...what the average guy who has to go through to get sex with a 6 plus american woman in the first place. Even the guys that know what they're doing with women are giving up a lot of time and energy to get to that point...with a decent looking girl anyway.

Then on top of it, there's the whole protection thing (a woman could look as attractive as Natasha Henstridge, and I wouldn't put it in there raw, I don't care what kind of pill she's on...I never want kids, period.)

My mind is stubborn though and has bought into the hype of sex. I don't need it to be "special"...unless by special you mean a girl that's at least a 6 by my standards, not a warpig or fugly woman...and in a bed...at least the first time.

I imagine a life where I love women, but am actually productive in other areas of my life because I've had sex and could give two sh*ts if I had it again in my life unless it was with a girl I really liked and was dating seriously.

I have no idea how to meet a 6 plus locally (I've officially given up on the pof bs...it's a buffer anyway)...I have no problem approaching in real life, and don't have much approach anxiety, but it usually leads nowhere...the average woman does not find me attractive...some do, but most don't. If the woman has already decided that she would never date or do you, there's nothing you can say that's going to make her interested in you.