Women from the East dont like masculine men

[Jaylan]

Ok so I have this Japanese friend who I am very attracted to. She is an international student at my school and has been in the states for about 4 years. We get on the subject of a bunch of things all the time. Well, last week when she came over to watch the NBA Finals game, we were talking about people we found attractive, and she shunned one name I mentioned because "eww no, too masculine"

She went to talk about how she, and East Asians in general, tend to prefer androgynous men. They can appreciate when guys do things that is beautiful.
We even talked about this guy.

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ0ZC3VXJQLE4918eyiWLFU7sJJzMDeyNasUNu1o-kMxYpGNXVebg

His name is Miyavi and hes wildly popular in Japan. Hes a rock star and she says girls find his beauty sexy, even when he doesnt dress up. I mean Hair Metal guys in the 80s were femme and still got so much tail. I mean hell, I used to be a punk rock kid, so I wore makeup, painted nails, and tight pants back in the day, but you change over time. Now I shop at hollister and H&M.


So it made me think how much difference there is to gaming women in her country, and all this "be a real man" stuff that we talk about here. Because she says "all that bravado and overcompensation Americans do turns off Japanese women a lot of the time"

And as someone who used to listen to a lot of Japanese rock music and watch their tv shows and such, Eastern Culture is so much different then Western Culture. Hell did you know that women in Japan find it hot when guys kiss, the total opposite of the bi craze in America. Rock stars even kiss their band mates for show, and the women in the audience go crazy. They call it fan service. Very similar to the Bi for show women here.

Btw, this puts a lot of things into perspective regarding how behavior and preferences are socialized and not simply genetic.

Anyways, so basically Im trying to figure out how to even game this girl because she doesnt respond to a lot of the things American girls would. I wonder if the masculinity I tried to project previously to her might of been to my detriment.

 

[The Pedantical]

Depends what you mean by masculine. No one likes a phony inhibited insecure prick. That's pretty universal.
Besides, Japan is weird anyway. They have vending machines selling used schoolgirl panties with a picture of the girl who wore them included in the little plastic bag.

 

[Jaylan]

..........lol @ the vending machine. I will ask her about that haha

But what I mean by masculine is typical stereotypes of "being a man" that we always talk about here.

Mostly looks wise and and somewhat personality wise it seems that East Asian countries have no issue with Androgynous or Feminine looking men, and there is def more lee way in what their expected behavior should be.

 

[The Pedantical]

http://f00.inventorspot.com/images/panty-vending-machine.img_assist_custom.jpg

Anyway my point was... feminine looking men or whatever, it's really got nothing to do with being the kind of guy who knows what he wants and is not afraid to lead. Shouldn't matter if you look like Richard Simmons

 

[Tyson420]

That's why I'm moving there.

 

[TIC]

It may be that way in Japan/China but I doubt women from Eastern European countries such as Russia and Ukraine have the hots for emo hiptser queers

 

[Jaylan]

It may be that way in Japan/China but I doubt women from Eastern European countries such as Russia and Ukraine have the hots for emo hiptser queers

what an ignorant statement. as someone who used to be in various music scenes i can tell you even women in this country go for that type of guy if thats their scene. just because youve been socialized to think men act this way or that way doesnt make them queers. grow the **** up.

just look at portraits of nobility from back in the day...or know that stocking and high heels used to mainly be worn by man to get my point. hell i used to pull girls just fine when i wore eyeliner and pained my nails...even girls not in my scene. and remember hair metal in the 80s? if you called those guys queer theyed beat your ass and screw the hot babes right after.

try and realize not everything happens inside your socialized bubble.

ps A placed i worked at a few summers ago had this international volunteer their who was from romania...guess who got with hair even though he was some brother with a lip ring and ond white middle finger nail on his right hand...oh thats right...me

now could someone give some advice how to game the girl from my OP?

 

[TIC]

what an ignorant statement. as someone who used to be in various music scenes i can tell you even women in this country go for that type of guy if thats their scene. just because youve been socialized to think otherwise doesnt make them queers. grow the **** up. hell i used to pull gierls just fine when i wore eyeliner and pained my nails...even girls not in my scene. and remember hair metal in the 80s? if you called those guys queer theyed beat your ass and screw the hot babes right after.

try and realize not everything happens inside your socialized bubble.

ps A placed i worked at a few summers ago had this international volunteer their who was from romania...guess who got with hair even though he was some brother with a lip ring and ond white middle finger nail on his right hand...oh thats right...me

now could someone give some advice how to game the girl from my OP?

so you're saying Russian women do not like muscular/masculine men?

 

[Jaylan]

Im saying different women like different things and there are plenty of women in western society that dont need men to fit stereotypical gender ideals. see my revised post of the one you quoted.
but really im asking about nations outside of the scope of major european influence...ie not majority white nations who have the same ideas of men and masculinity.

this thread is about how to land a chick who doesnt respond to the typical guy who comes to these websites or the general "be a man" archetype of america.

id like to hear from someone whos got an idea or done this before...not someone whos gonna say how gay someone is for not fitting into gender roles that dont apply everywhere

 

[BlackMack177]

If your friend does not like masculine men, then good for her.


I just proves that different women prefer different things. A lot of our sexuality is culture based and thus what we like is influenced a lot by what our society's standards are.

Back in the day fat chicks used to be considered attractive because it meant you had enough money to get fat and could also sustain a baby better than a 'sickly' skinny woman. These days fat chicks means you eat too much mcdonalds and don't work out. Not attractive anymore

I know women don't like masculine men, but I know plenty if not more who do want a man who looks like a man and acts like one too

 

[Alle_Gory]

Japan is weird anyway. They have vending machines selling used schoolgirl panties with a picture of the girl who wore them included in the little plastic bag.

There's also tentacle rape porn, a giant statue of a Gundam in Tokyo, men who marry pillows with pictures of anime girls on them... and the rest of this stuff: http://www.cracked.com/article_18567_6-japanese-subcultures-that-are-insane-even-japan.html

 

[DonGorgon]

its the feminist movement programming all women except muslim ones t like girly men.. it why soo many women are married to dating and having kids for gay men.

 

[ArcBound]

It may be that way in Japan/China but I doubt women from Eastern European countries such as Russia and Ukraine have the hots for emo hiptser queers

Lol I used to wear skinny jeans, scene shirts and the whole deal. One of my friends also dressed "emo". We probably got the most women in our whole group.

But then again anything that doesn't fit into the stereotype of steak eating, macho man is not masculine right?

 

[Jaylan]

If your friend does not like masculine men, then good for her.


I just proves that different women prefer different things. A lot of our sexuality is culture based and thus what we like is influenced a lot by what our society's standards are.

Back in the day fat chicks used to be considered attractive because it meant you had enough money to get fat and could also sustain a baby better than a 'sickly' skinny woman. These days fat chicks means you eat too much mcdonalds and don't work out. Not attractive anymore

I know women don't like masculine men, but I know plenty if not more who do want a man who looks like a man and acts like one too

Very true sir what you said about cultural influence

And actually I am taking an Art History course this summer. Those chicks who were being painted were not fat IMO. More like average to a bit chubby, but by no means fat.

And your last part about "looking like a man" does contradict your first statement about culture. What a man is supposed to look and act like is dictated by the culture and is different everywhere. However there are certain gender traits that are seen the same way across cultures as well.

There's also tentacle rape porn, a giant statue of a Gundam in Tokyo, men who marry pillows with pictures of anime girls on them... and the rest of this stuff: http://www.cracked.com/article_18567_6-japanese-subcultures-that-are-insane-even-japan.html

Lolz @ tentacle rape porn. Who can get off on that? o.0

Every country, including our own, has weird ass crap though. *shrugs*

its the feminist movement programming all women except muslim ones t like girly men.. it why soo many women are married to dating and having kids for gay men.

You are very wrong. Japan has no feminist movement at all in comparison to the way feminism occurred in Western Nations. Its very sexist and without much chivalry over there yet androgyny is valued. So you're totally wrong.

And marrying gay men? Stretching a bit now aren't we?

Lol I used to wear skinny jeans, scene shirts and the whole deal. One of my friends also dressed "emo". We probably got the most women in our whole group.

But then again anything that doesn't fit into the stereotype of steak eating, macho man is not masculine right?

Yup. True bro

Men do whatever it is that gets the girls, and women do the same thing to get the guys.

So yeah, like you, the way I used to dress got the punk babes I wanted. They are a lot harder for me to pull now, because while I still have stretched ears, a few tattoos, and wear a lip ring from time to time I wear Hollister and H&M type stuff.

And hot punk girls dont go for that generally lol =(

 

[Scars]

I'm in the same boat. I have stretched ears (7/8ths), lip pierced, and leg tattoos, used to pull scene slvts all the time.

Now.. not so much. I found this site. Now I work out. Keep my hair short, and got rid of all the bands tees.

Seems like the only ones getting those types of girls now are the extreme hipsters. You know, the ones that just go completely all out. I'd rather not be mistaken for a girl, personally.

As for the original topic, I agree and disagree at the same time. I don't think it's so much that Eastern woman don't like masculine men. I just think feminine men are more socially acceptable. Every woman wants a man to protect her. It's biologically programmed into them, no matter what culture. And if you even want to run with the whole Japan thing.. look at their pop culture. A lot of their movies define strong warriors. Look at their anime. Same thing. There are a lot of strong masculine figures that are idolized. Japan is extremely intelligent, and more open minded than America. I hate to say it, but it's true. We steal a lot of our technological advances from them. They value education, and intelligence. Especially the woman. You can almost consider intelligence a masculine trait, which a lot of these guys are. Intelligence can win wars, solve problems, make you rich, plus dozens of other benefits. I think the problem more or less is what really defines a masculine man? In America it's big muscles, motorcycles, and facial hair. At the end of the day it's all about the top dog. The alpha males. Our alpha males may be completely different than another cultures. The alphas are the ones calling the shots. Remember, having a sh!t ton of money is just as good as having barbaric size muscles. Either one can boss people around. Get what I'm saying? And let's not forget the fame factor.. A one hit wonder from the 80s who's broke now still has a better chance of getting tail than the average Joe, even if his looks are slightly better.

I think there's too many variables involved. Being a part of the "scene" all through HS, and still having friends that never grew out of it, AND having discovered this site I have come to the conclusion that alphas get the girl no matter what. Even if you see 5 girly boys hanging out down the street, wearing tight pants and wearing make up. That scene girl is going to pick the most manly one of them all. By this I mean.. she will test them all. Or just observe. She will know deep down which one is running the show. The one that the other 4 look up to. She will pick up on this. Like an animal scent, and that will be the one that gets the girl.

Horrible example, I know. But you get my drift.

-Scars

 

[Alle_Gory]

its the feminist movement programming all women except muslim ones t like girly men.. it why soo many women are married to dating and having kids for gay men.

So you've been to Japan and you can comment on their culture as well as the male female dynamics over there.

Tell me more. What about the feminist movement in Japan? When did it start? What did it start with? Who are the current role models for women there and their feminist views?

You clearly know your **** since you've been to Japan. Tell us more.

 

[loveshogun]

David Bowie, during his glam rock years, could have f*cked anyone he wanted.

That's because he was David f*ckin' Bowie. NOT because he dressed the way he did.

Trust me, your masculinity is not hurting you. A woman's opinion on fashion ("projected masculinity"... or lack thereof) is separate from her opinion on men ("actual masculinity").

It's like me saying "ew, she doesn't shave her bush." One, I'd never say that (though I prefer hairless cooch myself). Two, that's a judgment on fashion, not the woman herself.

 

[Jaylan]

Great post Scars. Repped. Top dog may be different in each scene or subculture, but a top dog none the less. But as all of us were "rockers" of some sort a little while back, like you said, the stuff that got us girls back then wont apply to the girls we try to get when we grow out of that stuff and move on to different types of women.

I am still trying to figure out how to game my Japanese gal pal. Maybe I should just not worry so much about my style and just lead and show I am the top dog. I should just be direct with her.

EDIT: Nice point as well loveshogun. I never thought about the separation of fashion and actual masculinity. Cus trust me when I say, I have known some dudes in the hardcore scene who the typical guy would call a faggot (like a lot of insecure dudes here do) and they were THE toughest guys in the scene. They threw down like nobodys business and didnt let people talk **** or beef with them or their friends. Def pack leaders despite their dress style.

 

[DonGorgon]

So you've been to Japan and you can comment on their culture as well as the male female dynamics over there.

Tell me more. What about the feminist movement in Japan? When did it start? What did it start with? Who are the current role models for women there and their feminist views?

You clearly know your **** since you've been to Japan. Tell us more.

what ever makes you feel better... you are scared i can see jit in your typed words...

most women like gay looking men now.. what are you gonna do?

 

[FairShake]

The worship of "bad boys" here borders on gay. I think a few of the guys here secretly want to fvck mma fighters, guidos, and James Bond.

Women, on the other hand, like a whole host of things. One thing they all like is confidence. It can be loud, quiet, confused, or even unconfident confidence (Michael Cera). But they like confidence and that really only comes from being who you really are.