I’ve dealt with many people who have had problems with woman; sexual, romantic, spiritual, ethnic and mental issues. Relationships are key in what I do.
I’m a qualified psychotherapist, Cambridge educated, and a Buddhist philosopher. I wanted to partake some of my knowledge in a set of posts. This really quick draft post, totally free thought and unedited is a challenge on what a women are to us usually.
I am anonymous for obvious reasons, ie to protect confidentiality etc:
Men mistakenly believe that women exist, out there. On one level they do but ultimately they don’t.
How do we normally relate to women?
We mainly relate to women in our imagination. With subjectivity being, of course, our unambiguous scale of interpreting a prospective mate. We perceive something outside, using something from within, our mind. Then we take her in. The games begin.
They have a form. They are aesthetically attractive. They seem to cause an inner desire within us. Yet it’s only what we perceive that brings us the real desire from inside.
We all have a type, or a girl who hits the mark for us, would be our perfect 10. Yet others would scoff. There are some girls who know this and use this against the male sex. This is a manipulative form of seduction. It’s what most DJ’s try to ‘cause’ in women. So that they become emotional and lustful.
In any interaction with a ‘sexy woman’, you go to war with your desire. Your inner desire. ‘She’ may not look amazing yet seem hot. She stimulates your inner core. Not by her own power but through your inner mental patterns of thinking and emotional reasoning. It’s not uncommon for ugly people to be bagging sexy people. Why? They simply hit buttons that other guys do not hit.
What is a woman?
She is form, thinking, feeling, emotion, behaviour, sensation but in the context of wanting to bang a lady where does she mostly exist and what is she?
You fancy her right? You wanna get laid right? So it should be obvious to you what is turning you on right? Wrong.
You say, “I like a tight butt or a good set of bangers”. Perhaps she is just ‘sexy’. Yet, these things rely entirely upon your perception. Other guys may think she’s a slut or gross or rank.
So I perceive these things. That’s what I like, it turns me on. That’s obvious. I don’t care what other guys like.
So this proves that your perception is ‘choosing’ various qualities based upon what you are thinking. If you were to pinpoint it, what is it you fancy?
Women exist mainly in the imagination
So many guys project hopes, dreams, misery, insecurity and loneliness onto the woman. Women do this too. An important thing to note is that the person you attracted to or want to date exists mainly in your imagination. Even your best friend or own mother is still a mystery to you. Imagination more than reality. This is just a part of existential reality. We can only relate to what we know. The rest we imagine.
If you were to ask the person who knows you best everything you think, believe, imagine and everything else to see it, experience like you. They could not. Impossible. It's too vast. They are in their own world and can only touch the surface of your experience.
The sexy girl you went out on a date with now exists as a concept. A story, based on reality and imagination. How easy it is to warp what we want into something that isn’t there. And to experience so much doubt! So much heartache happens this way.
The Johari Window principle says that we see very little of others. We imagine the rest. She imagines us to be something that we are not and we get her imagining that we are what she wants and needs. That’s an art of seduction. We play hard to get, spin plates and act like we are interesting and build a picture of someone who isn’t real but who seems appealing. We hope to attract these woman. Who are we really kidding?
How to deal with 10’s
10’s are more like 6’s. To look at them they seem so good, but if we uncover our fascination, we can just unearth desire, our own desire. This belongs to us. So whenever we meet or see a 10, they already belong to us, in our mind; our own creation. Perhaps she sees herself as a 4? We create them. But this principle works for our self too. I am a 10. I see my faults and failures but I am sexy, interesting and fun. The only place that stops my confidence is my imagination limit.
If we were to genuinely step into her life we would see her misery, her insecurities, her ugliness and disgusting antics that would make us puke. Yet we like the fantasy. It feels better.
When she is not around she exists entirely in my imagination. Either by re-created memories or fantasies like Freud would suggest. When you split up with someone, the relationship is dead, but she still remains. Like a real entity in your mind, destroying your happiness and will to let go into the present. Ruminating about what once was but now no longer exists. Black imagination. Dirty and deceptive. Promising happiness but brings misery.
Mindset
You are only ever afraid of your own imagination and old created thought patterns. Approaching woman is just this. If you imagine her laughing at you, so it will be in reality. If you imagine yourself confident, worthy of respect and adoration, the world, in your perception will follow your lead.
Conclusion
Realise how your mind plays a big part in your dating game. Master it and you will be more attractive than you could ever imagine. Light is more attractive than darkness.
I’m a qualified psychotherapist, Cambridge educated, and a Buddhist philosopher. I wanted to partake some of my knowledge in a set of posts. This really quick draft post, totally free thought and unedited is a challenge on what a women are to us usually.
I am anonymous for obvious reasons, ie to protect confidentiality etc:
Men mistakenly believe that women exist, out there. On one level they do but ultimately they don’t.
How do we normally relate to women?
We mainly relate to women in our imagination. With subjectivity being, of course, our unambiguous scale of interpreting a prospective mate. We perceive something outside, using something from within, our mind. Then we take her in. The games begin.
They have a form. They are aesthetically attractive. They seem to cause an inner desire within us. Yet it’s only what we perceive that brings us the real desire from inside.
We all have a type, or a girl who hits the mark for us, would be our perfect 10. Yet others would scoff. There are some girls who know this and use this against the male sex. This is a manipulative form of seduction. It’s what most DJ’s try to ‘cause’ in women. So that they become emotional and lustful.
In any interaction with a ‘sexy woman’, you go to war with your desire. Your inner desire. ‘She’ may not look amazing yet seem hot. She stimulates your inner core. Not by her own power but through your inner mental patterns of thinking and emotional reasoning. It’s not uncommon for ugly people to be bagging sexy people. Why? They simply hit buttons that other guys do not hit.
What is a woman?
She is form, thinking, feeling, emotion, behaviour, sensation but in the context of wanting to bang a lady where does she mostly exist and what is she?
You fancy her right? You wanna get laid right? So it should be obvious to you what is turning you on right? Wrong.
You say, “I like a tight butt or a good set of bangers”. Perhaps she is just ‘sexy’. Yet, these things rely entirely upon your perception. Other guys may think she’s a slut or gross or rank.
So I perceive these things. That’s what I like, it turns me on. That’s obvious. I don’t care what other guys like.
So this proves that your perception is ‘choosing’ various qualities based upon what you are thinking. If you were to pinpoint it, what is it you fancy?
Women exist mainly in the imagination
So many guys project hopes, dreams, misery, insecurity and loneliness onto the woman. Women do this too. An important thing to note is that the person you attracted to or want to date exists mainly in your imagination. Even your best friend or own mother is still a mystery to you. Imagination more than reality. This is just a part of existential reality. We can only relate to what we know. The rest we imagine.
If you were to ask the person who knows you best everything you think, believe, imagine and everything else to see it, experience like you. They could not. Impossible. It's too vast. They are in their own world and can only touch the surface of your experience.
The sexy girl you went out on a date with now exists as a concept. A story, based on reality and imagination. How easy it is to warp what we want into something that isn’t there. And to experience so much doubt! So much heartache happens this way.
The Johari Window principle says that we see very little of others. We imagine the rest. She imagines us to be something that we are not and we get her imagining that we are what she wants and needs. That’s an art of seduction. We play hard to get, spin plates and act like we are interesting and build a picture of someone who isn’t real but who seems appealing. We hope to attract these woman. Who are we really kidding?
How to deal with 10’s
10’s are more like 6’s. To look at them they seem so good, but if we uncover our fascination, we can just unearth desire, our own desire. This belongs to us. So whenever we meet or see a 10, they already belong to us, in our mind; our own creation. Perhaps she sees herself as a 4? We create them. But this principle works for our self too. I am a 10. I see my faults and failures but I am sexy, interesting and fun. The only place that stops my confidence is my imagination limit.
If we were to genuinely step into her life we would see her misery, her insecurities, her ugliness and disgusting antics that would make us puke. Yet we like the fantasy. It feels better.
When she is not around she exists entirely in my imagination. Either by re-created memories or fantasies like Freud would suggest. When you split up with someone, the relationship is dead, but she still remains. Like a real entity in your mind, destroying your happiness and will to let go into the present. Ruminating about what once was but now no longer exists. Black imagination. Dirty and deceptive. Promising happiness but brings misery.
Mindset
You are only ever afraid of your own imagination and old created thought patterns. Approaching woman is just this. If you imagine her laughing at you, so it will be in reality. If you imagine yourself confident, worthy of respect and adoration, the world, in your perception will follow your lead.
Conclusion
Realise how your mind plays a big part in your dating game. Master it and you will be more attractive than you could ever imagine. Light is more attractive than darkness.
