Women don't know what they want: the handsome man

jhonny9546

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So you may have experience with women discussing other "handsome" men. What the SMV theory says is true, and you can find that sometimes, these "handsome" men usually share the same characteristics.

However, when women say, "he is a handsome man, fit, muscular, tall, with tattoos everywhere," and then the same women are married to a completely different man and have children with him, what does this mean?

@AmsterdamAssassin will likely come here and say, "Women don't know what they want!" This statement holds truth.

Howhever let's, delve deeper into this.
Is it because a given woman fantasizes about these "handsome men" but:

- She feels she is not attractive enough to match?
- She believes she is not good enough to keep him?
- She would only consider him for a one-night stand or friends with benefits because the appearance of this "handsome" man does not indicate he would be a good provider or father for her and her children?
- Any other reason?

Those women fantasize so much and you can see em getting wet when in presence of those kind of men, but after all, those women are not pursuing those men at all?
 

BackInTheGame78

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This is irrelevant.

All you need to know that while they may not know what they want they DEFINITELY know what they DON'T want.

These include:

-weak men
-needy men
-depserate men
-boring men
-unconfident men
-unsexual men
-scared men(to make a move)
-indecisive men


Probably some others to listen but those are off the top of my head.
 
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Velasco

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They want the handsome guy for fun, short term pleasure
The man they marry is for practical stability purposes to build a future with.

Sometimes they end up marrying the first guy, but then regret it. because his same traits that make him a fun guy, make him a bad long term partner (liar, cheater, not as money motivated as the other guy)
 

oOh Nasty

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Because the man she wants pumps and dumps her.
 

holidayad_

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That's a good question.

Some women have told me they didn't approach me because they felt intimidated.

And I think it might happen to other fellas as well.

What I've seen some women do is create certain situations so that I initiate the contact or they do it themselves.

In LTR, they probably don't choose attractive guys because they might feel more insecure.
 

Hamurabimbi

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So you may have experience with women discussing other "handsome" men. What the SMV theory says is true, and you can find that sometimes, these "handsome" men usually share the same characteristics.

However, when women say, "he is a handsome man, fit, muscular, tall, with tattoos everywhere," and then the same women are married to a completely different man and have children with him, what does this mean?

@AmsterdamAssassin will likely come here and say, "Women don't know what they want!" This statement holds truth.

Howhever let's, delve deeper into this.
Is it because a given woman fantasizes about these "handsome men" but:

- She feels she is not attractive enough to match?
- She believes she is not good enough to keep him?
- She would only consider him for a one-night stand or friends with benefits because the appearance of this "handsome" man does not indicate he would be a good provider or father for her and her children?
- Any other reason?

Those women fantasize so much and you can see em getting wet when in presence of those kind of men, but after all, those women are not pursuing those men at all?
Isn’t this just the well known Alpha Fvcks, Beta Bucks?
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Those women fantasize so much and you can see em getting wet when in presence of those kind of men, but after all, those women are not pursuing those men at all?
My father once said, "You cannot own something beautiful without attracting unwanted attention."

If you have ever dated an objectively gorgeous woman, you will know all about unwanted attention. You will have to stay calm even when some smirking buttwipe is putting the move on your girlfriend, because losing your cool will show that you're possessive and jealous. Walking that tightrope can be taxing unless you don't care about losing her. After all, if she would be impressed by the smirking buttwipe, is she worth your attention?
But this does not just happen to women. If you're an attractive man, you will have women flirting with you, and not all women can handle that unwanted attention. And it becomes an effort for the woman to keep her cool and not scratch out the eyes of the smirking witch trying to slip her boyfriend a note or business card.

When you have the self esteem to stop caring about losing those people unworthy of your attention, people start giving you attention to show that they can be worthy of your attention. They stop disqualifying you and start qualifying themselves. They will perceive you to be of higher status, even when you're clearly not. Why? Because they don't get your attention and validation for free. They have to earn your attention. And something you earned is always more valuable than something given.
 

Solomon

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They want the handsome guy for fun, short term pleasure
The man they marry is for practical stability purposes to build a future with.

Sometimes they end up marrying the first guy, but then regret it. because his same traits that make him a fun guy, make him a bad long term partner (liar, cheater, not as money motivated as the other guy)
Yup this a huge one, a big thing too that happens is they may end up having the handsome man's kids and their SMV takes a hit in the dating market. Handsome men with options aren't going to take a single mother as seriously as a childless mother and heck some Top Tier guys (and even regular guys) won't even date (or smash) a single mother.

I know a chick who in her prime in her 20s was easily a 8-9 depending on whom you ask and was dating body builders, she now is lucky to get a dude with a dad bod or who is slim
 

Hamurabimbi

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My father once said, "You cannot own something beautiful without attracting unwanted attention."

If you have ever dated an objectively gorgeous woman, you will know all about unwanted attention. You will have to stay calm even when some smirking buttwipe is putting the move on your girlfriend, because losing your cool will show that you're possessive and jealous. Walking that tightrope can be taxing unless you don't care about losing her. After all, if she would be impressed by the smirking buttwipe, is she worth your attention?
But this does not just happen to women. If you're an attractive man, you will have women flirting with you, and not all women can handle that unwanted attention. And it becomes an effort for the woman to keep her cool and not scratch out the eyes of the smirking witch trying to slip her boyfriend a note or business card.

When you have the self esteem to stop caring about losing those people unworthy of your attention, people start giving you attention to show that they can be worthy of your attention. They stop disqualifying you and start qualifying themselves. They will perceive you to be of higher status, even when you're clearly not. Why? Because they don't get your attention and validation for free. They have to earn your attention. And something you earned is always more valuable than something given.
So you may have experience with women discussing other "handsome" men. What the SMV theory says is true, and you can find that sometimes, these "handsome" men usually share the same characteristics.

However, when women say, "he is a handsome man, fit, muscular, tall, with tattoos everywhere," and then the same women are married to a completely different man and have children with him, what does this mean?

@AmsterdamAssassin will likely come here and say, "Women don't know what they want!" This statement holds truth.

Howhever let's, delve deeper into this.
Is it because a given woman fantasizes about these "handsome men" but:

- She feels she is not attractive enough to match?
- She believes she is not good enough to keep him?
- She would only consider him for a one-night stand or friends with benefits because the appearance of this "handsome" man does not indicate he would be a good provider or father for her and her children?
- Any other reason?

Those women fantasize so much and you can see em getting wet when in presence of those kind of men, but after all, those women are not pursuing those men at all?
One of my Ex-s is now with a guy who is a good LTR catch. But is a Billy Beta. She told me he doesn’t give her orgasms.
I know the guy. He’s a really good guy and is devoted to her. He’d be a better husband and father than I.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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@AmsterdamAssassin will likely come here and say, "Women don't know what they want!" This statement holds truth.
If you really want to confuse a woman, you should give her what she really wants.

Chocolate shoes.
 
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Yup this a huge one, a big thing too that happens is they may end up having the handsome man's kids and their SMV takes a hit in the dating market. Handsome men with options aren't going to take a single mother as seriously as a childless mother and heck some Top Tier guys (and even regular guys) won't even date (or smash) a single mother.

I know a chick who in her prime in her 20s was easily a 8-9 depending on whom you ask and was dating body builders, she now is lucky to get a dude with a dad bod or who is slim
This is pretty accurate.
 

jhonny9546

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If you're an attractive man, you will have women flirting with you, and not all women can handle that unwanted attention
So this is why, in LTR, if a man has female friends or colleagues, and he spends time with them without his wife, she may start to value him more. This is because she feels the need to do something to keep him interested in her. Conversely, if she thinks he has other women in his life, she might consider him to be of low value. There are also different points of view to consider in this situation:

1. Working LTR
In this scenario, I can see how having female friends can be positive and enjoyable.

2. Non-working LTR (The couple may be in trouble or she could have lost interest.)
In this case, if there are issues such as her losing interest, she might use his interactions with other women as a reason to justify leaving him.

Yup this a huge one, a big thing too that happens is they may end up having the handsome man's kids and their SMV takes a hit in the dating market. Handsome men with options aren't going to take a single mother as seriously as a childless mother and heck some Top Tier guys (and even regular guys) won't even date (or smash) a single mother.

I know a chick who in her prime in her 20s was easily a 8-9 depending on whom you ask and was dating body builders, she now is lucky to get a dude with a dad bod or who is slim
It depends on the woman, but there are many plot twists here: she could have child and marriage with a "provider" while having a mask for all of his social circle, and then, have a secret handsome guy which **** her on the side. Reconnecting to the point "You cannot own something beautiful without attracting unwanted attention." I can see LTR's where wife are beautiful than the man: the man get nervous and insecure when in presence of other men.
You can be the most confident guy, but if she is prone to collect attention from other men, she may slip, and that It's a clear sign your SMV has lower value than her
If you really want to confuse a woman, you should give her what she really wants.

Chocolate shoes.
Explain this to noobs here
 
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AmsterdamAssassin

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Women like chocolate.
Women like shoes.
Give her chocolate shoes and she won't know whether to eat them or to wear them....
 

Bigpapa

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They want the handsome guy for fun, short term pleasure
The man they marry is for practical stability purposes to build a future with.

Sometimes they end up marrying the first guy, but then regret it. because his same traits that make him a fun guy, make him a bad long term partner (liar, cheater, not as money motivated as the other guy)
Very well put
 

Bokanovsky

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Howhever let's, delve deeper into this.
Is it because a given woman fantasizes about these "handsome men" but:

- She feels she is not attractive enough to match?
- She believes she is not good enough to keep him?
- She would only consider him for a one-night stand or friends with benefits because the appearance of this "handsome" man does not indicate he would be a good provider or father for her and her children?
- Any other reason?
He won't give her the time of day.

Why would a guy who is the stuff of female fantasies be interested in an average chick? Am I missing something?
 
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