Women are taking up Too Much of Your Time and You're a Loser.

[gravityeyelids]

I say this in the wake of a relationship that eroded me as a man and sapped up my time to the point where i was sacrificing my business and my personal well being, not working out and drinking constantly, neglecting my precious time, ALL SO THAT I COULD GET LAID AND LAY IN BED AND WATCH TV WITH A PRETTY GIRL for hours a day.

WE are spending too much time on women. Despite what Tyler Durden and other "experts" say (don't get me wrong, i'm a fan too) you SHOULD NOT be spending the majority of your waking hours thinking about women or spending time with women. And YES that includes reading about game and running it. Going out on an almost nightly basis to try to pick up women is not making you better as a person. That's fvcking ridiculous. Grow the Fvck Up. Poking around on the internet reading PUA theory is NOT making you an Alpha Male. You are filling a hole in yourself with something equally as shallow as booze or jerking off or sleeping or watching reality television. You are trying to cover up any pain and boredom and insecurity you have with what amounts to an endorphin rush. And not even one that is making you stronger, such as lifting weights or yoga. You cling to the idea that "oh well i just got laid", meanwhile REAL men are running laps around you and putting their axe to the grindstone and cultivating themselves and making their mark on the world. Spend the BARE MINIMUM amount of hours improving your skills with girls because it is one of MANY areas of your life you should be good at, and then get on with your life!

You want to talk about being a "real man"?? A "real alpha male" does not spend the vast majority of his time worrying about what women think. You should be worrying about how people view your character and how clients and colleagues view you as a professional/artist/worker/businessman. Are you the BEST at what you do? I guarantee you're not yet, so why are you wasting your time doing anything besides giving 100% to your body, your mind, your craft, and your career???

You think that just because you have a sexy girl riding your d!ck that you are a success? YOU ARE NOT. You are every bit of the loser you were before you read The Game and managed to bed your first or second hotty. Do you have your sh!t together outside of that or are you just compromising and rationalizing? I know plenty of guys that are fvcking hot girls and guess what? Most of them are low-lifes and broke losers with no talents or skills. You are not special in this regard.

ASK YOURSELVES THIS:
WHY are you looking at your phone 24/7, itching for the validation that comes from her texting you back?
WHY are you spending money on alcohol, clothes, women, etc instead of investing in your future, learning about finance and trying to get out of your parent's basement?
WHY are you unfulfilled when you're not receiving attention from women?
WHY is being seen with a beautiful girl more important than being seen as a master of your craft?
WHY are you racking up numbers on your bedpost and trying to spend as much time with as many women as you can instead of finding women who COMPLETE your life rather than DEFINING it?

YOU ARE A LOSER until you get these things handled. As am I. I have been a complete and total loser for over six months now, and i've awoken as a new person, and I invite you all to join me in this. This is not meant as a put-down. this is motivation

 

[AllDay85]

I say this in the wake of a relationship that eroded me as a man and sapped up my time to the point where i was sacrificing my business and my personal well being, not working out and drinking constantly, neglecting my precious time, ALL SO THAT I COULD GET LAID AND LAY IN BED AND WATCH TV WITH A PRETTY GIRL for hours a day.

WE are spending too much time on women. Despite what Tyler Durden and other "experts" say (don't get me wrong, i'm a fan too) you SHOULD NOT be spending the majority of your waking hours thinking about women or spending time with women. And YES that includes reading about game and running it. Going out on an almost nightly basis to try to pick up women is not making you better as a person. That's fvcking ridiculous. Grow the Fvck Up. Poking around on the internet reading PUA theory is NOT making you an Alpha Male. You are filling a hole in yourself with something equally as shallow as booze or jerking off or sleeping or watching reality television. You are trying to cover up any pain and boredom and insecurity you have with what amounts to an endorphin rush. And not even one that is making you stronger, such as lifting weights or yoga. You cling to the idea that "oh well i just got laid", meanwhile REAL men are running laps around you and putting their axe to the grindstone and cultivating themselves and making their mark on the world. Spend the BARE MINIMUM amount of hours improving your skills with girls because it is one of MANY areas of your life you should be good at, and then get on with your life!

You want to talk about being a "real man"?? A "real alpha male" does not spend the vast majority of his time worrying about what women think. You should be worrying about how people view your character and how clients and colleagues view you as a professional/artist/worker/businessman. Are you the BEST at what you do? I guarantee you're not yet, so why are you wasting your time doing anything besides giving 100% to your body, your mind, your craft, and your career???

You think that just because you have a sexy girl riding your d!ck that you are a success? YOU ARE NOT. You are every bit of the loser you were before you read The Game and managed to bed your first or second hotty. Do you have your sh!t together outside of that or are you just compromising and rationalizing? I know plenty of guys that are fvcking hot girls and guess what? Most of them are low-lifes and broke losers with no talents or skills. You are not special in this regard.

ASK YOURSELVES THIS:
WHY are you looking at your phone 24/7, itching for the validation that comes from her texting you back?
WHY are you spending money on alcohol, clothes, women, etc instead of investing in your future, learning about finance and trying to get out of your parent's basement?
WHY are you unfulfilled when you're not receiving attention from women?
WHY is being seen with a beautiful girl more important than being seen as a master of your craft?
WHY are you racking up numbers on your bedpost and trying to spend as much time with as many women as you can instead of finding women who COMPLETE your life rather than DEFINING it?

YOU ARE A LOSER until you get these things handled. As am I. I have been a complete and total loser for over six months now, and i've awoken as a new person, and I invite you all to join me in this. This is not meant as a put-down. this is motivation

Thanks bud, there's a lot of good **** in there.

 

[Genos]

First off, I agree with the sentiment of this thread - being with women is not the end-all be-all for sure, there are other things you can and should focus on.

However, I do have to add that having success with women is incredibly important for your overall well-being and life satisfaction. I have friends from college who are extremely intellectual, went to med school/got high-paying jobs in the tech industry and are reaping the rewards of their studies, but are still unhappy because they find it difficult to interact with women smoothly and achieve the dating lives they want.

If a lack of women in your life is something that is causing you unhappiness, then by all means you should bump it up the priority list and improve on it. Wanting to be with the opposite sex is a completely natural feeling, and one which will cause you a great deal of melancholy if you continually fail. Psychologists often evaluate a person's mental state by assessing how they feel in two areas - work and relationships. Depression or other mental disorders can be caused or contributed to by deficiencies in either area.

I've been rambling a bit, but basically what I'm saying is that yes, being with women and having sex should not govern your life nor take precedence over your development as a person. However, I just want to add a word of caution and say that it's wrong to suggest that it's not important. If it's making you unhappy, then you should invest some time into improving that area of your life.

 

[wifehunter]

When your life revolves that much around women. I imagine things get off balance.
Its always good to step back and look at the larger picture. Have a mission. Otherwise you're just a boytoy.

 

[Lozboss]

Obvious post OP.

All DJs know this.

 

[dustmuffin]

Good post. I still am thinking of giving up women for a while. I have so much to do it's overwhelming. Women do not add much to my life except taking up time.

 

[gravityeyelids]

Obvious post OP.

All DJs know this.

You're right, it's garbage, here MODs, just delete it. My bad bro. God forbid two posts are similar.

 

[zinc4]

Meh.....I just enjoy traveling and getting new women. To me, finances are nice. But without traveling, my life would be empty, even if I had all the money in the world. It depends on what makes you happy.

If for example being a devoted sexless monk makes one happy then more power to him.

 

[AllDay85]

Meh.....I just enjoy traveling and getting new women. To me, finances are nice. But without traveling, my life would be empty, even if I had all the money in the world. It depends on what makes you happy.

If for example being a devoted sexless monk makes one happy then more power to him.

Zinc,

I think we need to find a happy balance between self-improvement and pursuing women.

A lot of guys miss out in the long run by spending tons of time on pua tactics and wardrobe etc.

Bottomn line is, if travel is your prerogative (as it is mine), you agree travel is done best with lots of money. And with lots of money comes a fine woman on your arm!

 

[JohnChops]

"we" do not say we when you were the one who neglected to be a man in the relationship. Why is it guys stop going to the gym, forget about making money and the stuff that made them happy before, once they get into a relationship? So stupid. Every time I get into a relationship I never stop doing what I was doing before. Nothing has changed, except the fact you have a girlfriend.

 

[zinc4]

It's ironic...because I'm actually more likely to go to the gymn when I'm.in a relationship...

Because I'm not always hungover from out chasing new tail.

Self improvement is good....I do martial arts and I'm in process of landing a high paying job.

But I'm telling you....i d rather make a measley two grand a month and live in an exoctic new location banging exoctic new chicks and completely immersing myself in a new culture and die financially poor than living a mundane normal existance here in the states pulling in 10 grand a month. But that's just me.

I'm only here to help take care of my widowed mother...so regardless of what in doing here, I feel like I am doing the right thing, even if its not what I really want to be doing at the moment.

So I definitely get the gist of your post OP. I just think the details are tailored more to your specific situation.

And why were u only laying up in bed with one hottie all that time? I'd probably feel like a loser too in that scenario. Never let one woman dictate your life.

 

[salinechow]

"we" do not say we when you were the one who neglected to be a man in the relationship. Why is it guys stop going to the gym, forget about making money and the stuff that made them happy before, once they get into a relationship? So stupid. Every time I get into a relationship I never stop doing what I was doing before. Nothing has changed, except the fact you have a girlfriend.

The reason some men do and others do not goes way, way deeper than the surface age they are at. He probably was involved with a BPD trait type woman who manipulated the peace, and his time, with outrageous, crazy making sentiments. His need to please and also achieve her probably quickly declining affirmations from her manipulated his time and energy. IT HAPPENS! To even the strongest men, but usually just the mediocre men, more often. Time and time again you will read on this forum, for the likes of me included, the pursuit of the honeymoon phase because it felt so good. It actually isnt the fault of the man who falls for this manipulation because these woman prey on our (perceived) strengths as men to endure fire and brimstone to conquer all.

Then, somewhere along the line the "REAL" man awakens and says " What the F^ck am I doing!" The balls grow back and you leave, or, you get dumped and embrace the the outcome of defeat as opportunity.

Its kinda why we are all here:

Options. (and getting better at pulling in and spotting good ones)
So...That you will always walk away. ( Not to manipulate but to honor yourself first)
To realize that ALL great men, DJs as well, suffer defeat and loss. (it what we choose to do with it that makes you a man. And, why we come together to support one another in progress, either before or after pain. )

OP, I commend your words, your humility and self awareness. I come along side you in understanding and camaraderie to congratulate you on your recent break up, given the awareness you gained and your ability and effort to place it out there for us.

Good on ya. Thank you.

 

[cola]

TL;DR
But speak for yourself. These days I meet most of my women via daygame, doing this that are part of my routine.
Train omw to work, grocery store, mall while I'm shopping
And I don't go out of my way rearranging my schedule for dates. If the schedules don't match they don't match.
I keep 3-4 plates and don't skip a beat.

I think the fact that I'm busy and dont go out my way to make time women intrigues them

Tl:dr you're doing it wrong ...

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Rather travel and eat great food. The thread title is funny though

 

[Trump]

I say this in the wake of a relationship that eroded me as a man and sapped up my time to the point where i was sacrificing my business and my personal well being, not working out and drinking constantly, neglecting my precious time, ALL SO THAT I COULD GET LAID AND LAY IN BED AND WATCH TV WITH A PRETTY GIRL for hours a day.WE are spending too much time on women.

Come on bro, you are over compensating.

You think that just because you have a sexy girl riding your d!ck that you are a success? YOU ARE NOT. You are every bit of the loser you were before you read The Game and managed to bed your first or second hotty. Do you have your sh!t together outside of that or are you just compromising and rationalizing? I know plenty of guys that are fvcking hot girls and guess what? Most of them are low-lifes and broke losers with no talents or skills. You are not special in this regard.

There are guys who are rich and talented and are the best at their craft, but dying inside and lonely because they have no girl, no wife, no family. You always have to look at the other side of the situation.

ASK YOURSELVES THIS:
WHY are you looking at your phone 24/7, itching for the validation that comes from her texting you back?
WHY are you spending money on alcohol, clothes, women, etc instead of investing in your future, learning about finance and trying to get out of your parent's basement?
WHY are you unfulfilled when you're not receiving attention from women?
WHY is being seen with a beautiful girl more important than being seen as a master of your craft?
WHY are you racking up numbers on your bedpost and trying to spend as much time with as many women as you can instead of finding women who COMPLETE your life rather than DEFINING it?

YOU ARE A LOSER until you get these things handled. As am I. I have been a complete and total loser for over six months now, and i've awoken as a new person, and I invite you all to join me in this. This is not meant as a put-down. this is motivation

Bro you too harsh. Society almost values a girl on your arm more than ANYTHING. Whether its stupid, dumb, irrational, is not the point. It's the truth. Prove the point? Canada would NOT accept Syrian refugees who were Doctors, Lawyers, Astrophysicists, Surgeons, Teachers, and were SINGLE MEN. You would have to have a wife or a family to be accepted. So, you could be the smartest guy in the world and be the best guy at your craft and own a multi billion dollar business, but a Western government would rather accept a guy with no job or skills but knew how to attract the opposite sex, and you would get REJECTED because you didn't know how to attract girls.

Brutal.

 

[FCB]

I agree with your overall approach but each person has to define what is important to them and what fulfills their life. Women being an obsession I'd argue is not healthy, I'd also argue that defining yourself by your career where you are ass kissing and chasing a carrot making other people rich is a waste of your time and energy. If that's being successful with women then so be it, if that's climbing mountains then so be it. There aren't any hard and fast rules, we are all just a cluster of atoms walking around trying to make sense of one huge universe while we ourselves are our own individual universe that we must learn to sustain. Figure out what fulfills you, be your own master and make your own rules, avoid societies constraints and find your own truths and strive to live by them. Most people will be happier being healthy, well rounded excelling in different areas and relationships with women most likely will fit in there, but the biggest goal imo should be to free yourself from expectations of others and find your passion and live it. I don't enjoy humping a boring job 5 days a week so I've worked to free myself from that and be able to socialize when I want, work on things I enjoy, compete at things that feed my competitive nature and enjoy freedom to build the life I want, travel, ski and leave this world saying I ****ing lived how I wanted and I didn't waste my life chasing things that never truly made my life more enjoyable. The funny thing is people actually look down at that which is hilarious, they do not understand how you can live free of the fear of going it alone, taking risks and fear not having 'security'. I keep working towards freedom, financially I'm better off then I've ever been, I removed myself from a terrible soul sucking relationship, a terrible soul sucking job and I'm working harder every day to turn big ideas into the life that I want regardless of what anyone else thinks. Women are a side project, work unless I enjoy it is just a means to an end, I want to be a better me and I will look deep inside myself to find what makes me happy and not negatively judge myself.

 

[FCB]

Come on bro, you are over compensating.



There are guys who are rich and talented and are the best at their craft, but dying inside and lonely because they have no girl, no wife, no family. You always have to look at the other side of the situation.



Bro you too harsh. Society almost values a girl on your arm more than ANYTHING. Whether its stupid, dumb, irrational, is not the point. It's the truth. Prove the point? Canada would NOT accept Syrian refugees who were Doctors, Lawyers, Astrophysicists, Surgeons, Teachers, and were SINGLE MEN. You would have to have a wife or a family to be accepted. So, you could be the smartest guy in the world and be the best guy at your craft and own a multi billion dollar business, but a Western government would rather accept a guy with no job or skills but knew how to attract the opposite sex, and you would get REJECTED because you didn't know how to attract girls.

Brutal.

Who gives a ****? Do you let society create your goals and define what will make a happy life? You know how many married people are ****ing miserable, because they are doing what society deems successfull and safe. Now I do think that fostering a healthy relationship with a woman can lead to happiness but there are other ways, and focusing on the quality of that relationship is more important then worrying for a second about how society will judge you, that imo is what leads to miserable people which is another side to the coin of the rich and talented who are miserable. That is a followers mentality, leaders define their own path and don't let the herd do it for them, alpha's don't sit in the herd they break away from it.

 

[zinc4]

Travel, see the world, live an adventure... Live in different cultures... Bang as many different women as you can until you are satisfied. What's not to love?????

I'd join the French Foreign Legion right now for the hell of it, if I thought they would have me.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

As evolution will have it, spreading our genes makes us feel good because it is necessary for our survival. Being with other women is a small part of that, so it does make us happy. Denying that is to deny your instincts. Of course, you should NOT focus solely on women, as every moment you aren't with them will be painful, like a drug. So, you keep variety in your life by doing other things and by focusing on things other than women. This will keep you content and happy with your life. Anyway, good post OP.

I have most of these things crossed off my checklist so it feels good to know that I'm ahead of most people out there. I'm still a kid though so I've still got a lot to do

 

[JohnChops]

The reason some men do and others do not goes way, way deeper than the surface age they are at. He probably was involved with a BPD trait type woman who manipulated the peace, and his time, with outrageous, crazy making sentiments. His need to please and also achieve her probably quickly declining affirmations from her manipulated his time and energy. IT HAPPENS! To even the strongest men, but usually just the mediocre men, more often. Time and time again you will read on this forum, for the likes of me included, the pursuit of the honeymoon phase because it felt so good. It actually isnt the fault of the man who falls for this manipulation because these woman prey on our (perceived) strengths as men to endure fire and brimstone to conquer all.

Then, somewhere along the line the "REAL" man awakens and says " What the F^ck am I doing!" The balls grow back and you leave, or, you get dumped and embrace the the outcome of defeat as opportunity.

Its kinda why we are all here:

Options. (and getting better at pulling in and spotting good ones)
So...That you will always walk away. ( Not to manipulate but to honor yourself first)
To realize that ALL great men, DJs as well, suffer defeat and loss. (it what we choose to do with it that makes you a man. And, why we come together to support one another in progress, either before or after pain. )

OP, I commend your words, your humility and self awareness. I come along side you in understanding and camaraderie to congratulate you on your recent break up, given the awareness you gained and your ability and effort to place it out there for us.

Good on ya. Thank you.

He didn't say she was bpd but if she was, I've been there and I understand that. I thought he was speaking in more general "all" women terms