Wierd situation

[SSJ]

hey mates, i just signed up on this forum and saw alot of good tips and the like, i would also like to have your opions about my situation:


well in july 2009 i got hooked up with my ex, we had a relationship for 9,5 months, but then 4 months ago she went on a schooltrip and met a guy there ( from our school) with who she fell inlove with, you can guess what followed, we broke up and all that.

but my problem is i cant get over her, but its ( i think) not only my fault, cause she still speaks alot with me via MSN and we still SMS a decent amount with each other( my friend says he doesnt understand her at all anymore) and she still calls me motek( means dear in hebrew, long story) almost everyday when we finish talking with each other.

she still has with that other guy, but i cant still get over her.. and i have a feeling she isnt quite over me yet, what do you guys think? should i give it a go to get back with her( i know i know... she cheated on me, but i cant let go for some reason)

thx in advance

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Exactly what DJ_Hero said. Go no contact (Remove her from your phone and msn. Do not change your routines or get out of your way not to meet her.)
Spin other plates. Being with other girls, friends and having a generally busy life is the answer to most questions on this forum. I also keep recommending the Book of Pook; it's amazing. Read it.

 

[pinhas]

Motek means "Sweet" or "Sweetheart" in Hebrew, just FYI

And the fact you cant get over her IS your fault!

Stop talking to her, go FULL NO CONTACT! No SMS, no MSN and no any other 3 letter acronyms that stand for any kind of communication medium.

Keeping in touch with her preventing you from moving on; you keep having that “idea” in your head that somehow all will turn out and you will get back together and run together towards the sunset. It will not happen; I don’t mean to be blunt, but if it didn’t work once and she left you for another guy, what will ever stop her from doing that again IF you do get back together.

You should be grateful she showed you who she is and speared you the time and nerves of finding out later on in life. You are young and have so much time ahead of you for heartaches, joys and everything that’s between.

First you should stop ALL contact with her, then take a good look at yourself and try to figure out what qualities in you pushed her away; figure out how to be a real man. Then you will begin the long journey to self evaluation and inner growth. When your done, you will see how your getting higher quality women and will forget that once in high school you had a girl that dumped you.

Instead of wasting time trying to get her back and keeping in touch with someone who betrayed you, take this opportunity to change yourself and grow as a person.

Read the DJ Bible (bottom of the page) and The Book of Pook

 

[SSJ]

well i tried no contact, around 3 months ago i broke every means of contact i had with her, but then a month ago she started talking alot with me again, but i guess ill have to try and get over her.

thx for the help

and ps i know that motek means sweet/sweetheart, i couldnt find the right word to translate it

and btw, she was my first gf, so i guess thats also a reason why i cant get over her easily

 

[bradlystaton]

If you feel she is cheating you, better keep silent don't replied in MSN and SMS. If you couldn't break the relationship, can try yoga and meditations to keep yourself comfortable.

 

[SSJ]

hmm what would you guys advise me to do if she keeps trying to contact me?

 

[FreshMenTank]

Wow man you got your hands full. If I were you, I'd use this as a part of my life to learn from. You're becoming a DJ. All I really got to say is take the given advice, and forget bout her. Experiment with other girls.

 

[SSJ]

Wow man you got your hands full.

you can say that again, and it sometimes seems to get wierder.. last saturday (after around a week and a half not speaking with her) she sent me a text msg at 8:45 am..(yes AM) while i was still sleeping, with just a random"normal" normal msg which i answered normally, and also a week ago there was a free music festival in our town and when i was there, i felt someone looking at me , it was my ex, she walked with her new bf, but her gaze was fixed on me.

If I were you, I'd use this as a part of my life to learn from. You're becoming a DJ. All I really got to say is take the given advice, and forget bout her. Experiment with other girls.

hehe, i already learned alot.. and i mean alot, after reading the DJ bible and the book of pook and looking back at my relationship with her , i see that i used to be as much as an AFC as one can be. but i now i know what to do differently, and im a much better person altogether then i was 5 months ago.

 

[toniothe3rd]

well in july 2009 i got hooked up with my ex, we had a relationship for 9,5 months, but then 4 months ago she went on a schooltrip and met a guy there ( from our school) with who she fell inlove with, you can guess what followed, we broke up and all that.

damn, i'd ignore her and shamelessly flirt with her friends if they're greasy, but I'm not proud of that. Honorable thing would prolly be to treat her just like you'd treat any female friend. Don't try to get back with her.

 

[FreshMenTank]

Aw, all I can say is keep progressing. You seemed to have determined your problems, and know how to fix 'em. Good job, and good luck in the future.