Why wont women show interest?

[yul]

Hi,

the last few girls I dated were not very friendly during the initial pick up..

Actually, they looked bored and impatient at some extent.

They did however later confess that they liked me from the start. Why would that be?

I rarely get any smiles from women (maybe once a week) but some close friends and women friends tell me I should not have any difficulty picking up any girl I like.

Yet, they are VERY DISTANT AT ALL TIMES!

I am a very sociable and friendly person yet I try to use the stuff I read here.

I do get results but it's a lot of effort. Plus, I am yet to get the girl I really like.

Thanks

 

[Phyzzle]

Actually, they could even be called repulsive at some extent.

You mean "repulsed" right? Hah.

But you ended up dating them, right? What happend in between?

 

[yul]

You mean "repulsed" right? Hah.

But you ended up dating them, right? What happend in between?

Yeah thats it.

What I mean is that they showed no(zero,nada) interest and were also a bit hard to deal with.

They left very little openings either in terms of discussion.

I reallty had to use the DJ skils I learning here to the outmost extent in order to get going.

They did soften up after a bit though...so that's how I managed.

Thanks!

 

[Yorgho]

It's cause women are flippin crazy. lol

That and the fact that women get to do the choosing. We approach them, we get them to talk and so on. Most women won't come to you because they don't have to. If you don't go to them, another guy will.

 

[yul]

Thanks a lot for your replies.

This is very encouraging.

I will work on this.

Cheers.

 

[d9930380]

I think it's because they don't want to "lead you on" incase they change their mind. They're still judging you at those early stages. They want to be "won". I've screwed up a few opportunities because I "thought" a girl wasn't interested and bailed by acting like a "friend" because I didn't want to seem desperate. Later I've realised or been told that she was interested. As other people say here, "Assume she is interested" - let her reject you, at least that way you won't have any regrets.

 

[flexion_]

The subtle clues women give for interest take a little practice to pick up. Stop looking for clues and just use deja vu as your guide.

If she happens to be around you a lot she likes you. If she is with you she likes you. If its very easy to contact her she likes you. Assume any women that is with you (on your day-to-day radar) likes you - then you won't have to worry about trying to figure out facial expressions and mood swings... LOL

The only signals you really need to pick up on are those that say "I don't like you." And they are pretty obvious.

 

[Hitman10000]

I disagree with the motto "Always Assume Interest"

I also disagree with looking for body language that indicates interest, go to a strip club, you think women are stupid?

Okay hear me out here for the truth whether a girl is interested in you or not:

The truth is in your gut.

There are some girls out there where you feel like 'damn, that is some fine a$$ b1tch, I'm going to talk to her right now' and then there are some fat/ugly girls where your gut says 'meh or ugh' The gut has never failed me ever, and if it hasn't been working for you, it's only because you don't trust it and yourself. You question it, you analyze it, you just don't go with it.

 

[silverfox]

Interesting thread.

There are a few indicators via body language that show a woman is initially interested. She flicks her hair, bats her eyelids at you and looks away, licks her lips etc. Of course this only ever happens in Hollywood movies and aftershave commercials and never in any damn reality we know.

I agree that women never show initial interest to an unsolicited approach. Why on earth would they? However, I have also found that as well as the "cold fish", some girls usually smile and chat when you open them even though before you approached them they looked rather distant and reserved.

I guess you never know until you say hello but my problem is I can never get myself to approach consistently even though I know that even when it goes wrong, it is way better than not approaching at all.

 

[d9930380]

I agree also about trusting your gut but sometimes your gut instinct can be biased based on your own insecurities. It can also be a vicious circle where your gut might be wrong initially but then how you act on this CAN change her mind about you and then it's right. Once you're a confident don juan then you can rely on it alot more. At the end of the day, you can't go wrong if you assume attraction. The worst that can happen is that she will tell you to get lost - then you will never be left wondering. You should never base your own oppinion of yourself on some woman so it shouldn't effect you. We need to have a thick skin.

 

[silverfox]

You should never base your own oppinion of yourself on some woman so it shouldn't effect you. We need to have a thick skin.

Gold dust. To be read out loud every day.

 

[Latinoman]

1- I don't know if I understood this correctly...but you took women that show NO interest in you to dates?

2- "I rarely get any smiles from women (maybe once a week) but some close friends and women friends tell me I should not have any difficulty picking up any girl I like. " - Do you truly need your friends and other women reassurance? If that is the case...then you need to work in your self-esteem or whatever is making you doubt yourself.

 

[00Kevin]

simple..

They are usless women. Most likely americanized trash that don't know how to show respect for men.

Don't waste your thoughts on these kinds of women just show pity for them.

 

[neugene]

From my observation, Females, more so then men,
are very afraid of rejection. Really, to approach anyone and show interest
is intimidating. So what a lot of females do is sneak a look at their interests
and then create an excuse for themselves as to why she will not approach
or even show interest. Her Loss, but she may never admit this to herself.
I have a saying that "most Females, are in second class relationships"
What I mean by that is, because they do not approach the man or men
they find interesting, they lose out on their number one interest, which
forces them to wait until another male (2nd male), to approach them. If
the 2nd male is half way decent enough, then she may get involved with
him. "2nd Class relationship."
Most will argue that females are not meant to approach males. That's not
entirely true. Because, if her desire of affection is someone she is aware of
is for example, rich and/or famous, she will set aside her pride or fears and approach that male.
Bottom line, females act this way, Women do not. Women know how to intelligently approach the man of her interest and not take it too personal IF rejected.

 

[acw]

beware of the Professional daters...

they will go out with you...as long as you are buying the meal. Why not....nothing better to do?

 

[Atom Smasher]

OP, could it be that you're too friendly? Many of us here want to be decent, friendly people, but that doesn't attract the opposite sex, unfortunately. You need to add some technique and some badass to the equation.

 

[Nutz]

If a woman truly wants you she'll jump through hoops and do all kinds of crazy wild stuff to make it happen. When you finally see it for real it'll blow your mind what women will do for a man they really want.

 

[NSUballer]

Interesting thread.

I could have sworn this girl I been trying to date was at least minimally attracted to me and yet I get nothing from her.

I have called her twice in the past month to ask her out, no answer. Left message once and texted twice.

When I see her she is all smiles and talkative and talks to me about things I dont ask about but when I call she doesnt answer and doesnt call back.

Did I miss something here?

 

[Victory Unlimited]

NSUballer,


I imagine that what you're actually missing here is a woman who has REAL romantic interest in you. Most women who are actually interested in you are looking for an "excuse" to open the "communication door" wider for you to at least express MORE interest in HER more directly. From the looks of it, seems like this woman doesn't even think about you until she wants to fill her spare time up with casual, MEANINGLESS conversation------and nothing more.

It's possible that this chick you're talking about just gets off on the "idea" that you want her-------but she's not really interested in letting you ACT on your desire for her. Some women just feel emotionally validated by the fact that certain guys want them-----it's an ego stroke for them.

If you haven't already, go ahead and make a DEFINITIVE move on her. Ask her out "on the spot" the next time you see her. Ask her out on an obvious date. Not as part of a group and make sure that you don't use terms like "come hang out with me". Plenty of women just LOVE to pretend to be confused about your intentions if the move you make on them is NOT direct and strong.

Most of the time, when you make a bold move on a girl she'll either put up or shut up. And that's what you need for this woman to do. If she says "yes", go ahead and do your thing. But if she says "no", put her back on the shelf with the rest of the hermetically sealed barbie dolls who would much rather you "look" but don't touch.

It's summer time, soldier. It's time to STOP burnin' daylight wasting time with women who ONLY want to waste your time. I'm sure you have a million things better to do than to light up this chick's cell phone with texts and messages that she doesn't even give you the courtesy of returning.

The sooner you stop small-talking with her the faster you'll know if it's time to move FORWARD or to move ON.


MAKE YOUR MOVE.



V.U.

 

[NSUballer]

Victory U!

Always insightful and much appreciated!

The gist of this one is that I have known her for a while, friend of a friend.

I called and left a message a few weeks ago asking her out. I would never do the "lets hang out" thing, too weak and not my style.

I saw her in the grocery tonight after I had left the gym and I have been thinking about just going to her house and making her either accept my offer or reject it. I surely wouldnt take it personally.

thanks