Why we are 'scared'

[johnmich]

I was reading a thread by Jcrew and really started thinking why people are intimidated by HB's.

I can talking to Uglies and Fatties with ease but why.
They are still chicks.

What is it that makes us intimidated by them. Not that they are strangers to us (if thats the case) but i can talk to strange uglies (i dont that much).

Anyone any insight into this.
Its probably been done before. We go on about the mindset, the pedestal all the other stuff yet still we remain in fear.

What the f*ck. What is in our heads, why the 'fear'?

It is really winding me up how the block on us is so hard to destroy or knock down.

Why is it even there.

I am so angry now

 

[joekerr31]

people are raised to be MOST afraid of being a failure. think of it. since the time you entered school all you've ever been told is 'DONT FAIL". you're judged and graded at every turn.

our society is very very very clear on what it values - WINNERS.

losers are meat for the grinder.

so guys FEAR women because they are the ultimate judge of us. We think they are the ultimate objective judge as to how we stack up against other men.

My view is that failure is good. Life is mostly about failure, get use to it. The most important factor in being successful, is failure. The people who are successful in the long run usually are successful because they don't give up in the face of failure.

once you stop caring about failing and stop judging yourself based on the immediate results of your efforts, the world becomes your playground.

as it pertains to women, the only power a woman has over you is your fear of her rejecting you. overcome that fear and you can walk up to the hottest woman on the planet and take your shot with nerves of cold steel. you may not get her, but if you truly have overcome your fear of failure, it won't matter to you either way whether you do or not.

overcoming psychological fear is the key to success with women, in business, and with just about anything in life.
J

 

[Mr. Cardio]

you fear what you cant defeat. you cant defeat it, because you have not done your homework. and I have no idea on why you havent done your homework.

Kid, I am in sales, growing and really starting to make some loot. I was scared shyt of sales, until I learned how to master it and win. You will always be scared to approach hot girls because you dont know how to win, read this site and find something that you can use that will work naturally for you and will benefit you, do a search. Until you do your homework, fear will always overtake you, and why shouldnt it, you dont know what the outcome will be, and thats why you're scared! When you have a game plan and have done your homework, you can predict the outcome and relax.

 

[Tazman]

The fear is the pedestal, that's it. That's precisely why a lot of guys don't have this problem with women who are less attractive.

 

[johnmich]

In words, it is easy to say 'overcome your fear' but to do so is harder.

I am improving but you cannot really plan the outcome of this 'game' but i am seriously gonna work on the failure thing.
- not failing, but succeeding from failure

You have all been a big help and i now understand a little more.

 

[johnm420]

ha it kinda anwsers my question from bootcamp

 

[Mr. Cardio]

you can predict an outcome buddy. When you read and understand the things on this site, and start appyling them, you will see that even women you already knew will begin looking at you differently, women will be more nicer to you, etc., etc. Get your mind cleared of this negative crap that society and family have filled you with that success is pure luck, success is pure plan. A successful plan takes study and research to make sure you have the essentials and everything down, then all it takes is getting off your butt and doing it. Most people can get off their butt, but few can properly plan. And fear is the pedestal, and why do men put women on pedestals? Exactly! Because they dont know how to attract them personally, so they try and do it nicely. Worship anything else but God and you are a fool.

 

[johnmich]

aaahh true.

 

[tmpgstx]

Fear comes from negative past experiences, which most of us have had plenty of i'm sure. Women experience also. If they reject you, could be for some reason based on her experiences (which you'll never know).

The important thing to know is that if you know you're a great guy and do things well and get rejected, don't take it at face value, it could be something or someone in her life. If she's a flakey sleep-around girl, then a 'good' guy (you know, the kind most decent women marry) - she'll be uncomfortable with and around you. In other words, you're too square for *that* type of girl.

Add great looks, intelligence and success and you got even more problems lol - watch the flakiness unfold before your very eyes with girls who want to just sleep with you for a night, but have to be really drunk to do it, because when they're more sober are much intimidated.

 

[sikpupy]

I just dont like going up to a chick to give her the cahnce to blow me off for the simple fact that the more guys she can blow off, the hotter she thinks she is. Its a visious cycle that makes the giant serphants head grow and I dont want to be fuel for the fire.

Not sure if I am actually afraid of "failure" though.

 

[Egoist]

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
--- Frank Herbert, Dune - Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear

 

[Badmannaz]

th only girls i've approach were when i was drunk and thet too were drunk so i guess i haven't really approach any chicks yet...
I get this mild anxiety attack when i am attempting and every girl i see i always think that no matter what there is a guy who is better than me and i always just pass in utter defeat everytime...

the hot ones are a challenge..i think you fear them because you start thinking there's some guy hotter out there or macho who's going to get her.

 

[xblitz44x]

Here is the answer. It's a long one.

http://www.seducingwomen101.com/dag/dag4.html

And yes, I'm still pimping it out. It's good info.