Why "The Dating Market" Sucks

[bigneil]

I try to promote them by capturing their beauty on film or in artwork.

 

[The Duke]

She liked you obviously. But just so we're clear, you do have a job, correct? Did she earn more than you?

I take no pride in having a woman finance my bills. You are pimping her out.

Yes I have a very good job. I'm quite capable financially, money has never been an issue. I'm a professional in corporate America. She earned 40% less than I did. I take no pride in offering a gravy train to any woman. If she wants to be with me for my money, then I don't want to be with her! The best way to prevent that is to not offer it up.

 

[Poon King]

Why do you consider these to be "gay"? The other points that Howie made are good as well but yes, they can be "debatable", but I would personally state that these three things in this quote (connection, support system, better sex) are three of the pillars of an LTR that aren't really that much available with the spinning of plates.

Gay because its based on co-dependence.

Think of the toughest man you know. Now picture him talking about "deep connections". Sounds gay.

Better sex is false. Maybe the first two months the sex is better. Not after that unless she is trying to get pregnant. Even then.. its a case by case thing. Some women are bad in bed. Doesn't matter if you "know them well" or not.

 

[Poon King]

The only good reason to have an LTR is HELP!!!

Help with cooking, cleaning, daily chores etc.

Help with business

Help with making life easier

Help with the human desire to have a companion.

Help with sex

Did I miss anything? (Verbal irony)

Yep, its all about help basically.

What is missing from the LTR trumpeters is a good argument to be "exclusive". I don't see one in sight. Plates can be considered "relationships" and they provide some of this stuff too. BUT you are not devoted to them exclusively so you keep your freedom and privacy.

Why commit to ONE woman? Because you're either lazy or co-dependent. There is no "good reason" that is logical. Even the financial reasons strongly depend on the woman you date. And if you're getting into a LTR for financial reasons you have failed at life AND as man IMO.

The reason my assault on LTR's is so offensive is because it forces men to really look at themselves. Deep down.. every man knows its weak and "a woman's frame". That's why its so hard to have leverage in these relationships. The truth hurts.

 

[wifehunter]

Yep, its all about help basically.

What is missing from the LTR trumpeters is a good argument to be "exclusive". I don't see one in sight. Plates can be considered "relationships" and they provide some of this stuff too. BUT you are not devoted to them exclusively so you keep your freedom and privacy.

Why commit to ONE woman? Because you're either lazy or co-dependent. There is no "good reason" that is logical. Even the financial reasons strongly depend on the woman you date. And if you're getting into a LTR for financial reasons you have failed at life AND as man IMO.

The reason my assault on LTR's is so offensive is because it forces men to really look at themselves. Deep down.. every man knows its weak and "a woman's frame". That's why its so hard to have leverage in these relationships. The truth hurts.

Yeah, I would have 7 wives if I thought I could manage...but, I need my privacy and alone time, so one or two, is enough.

 

[Poon King]

I have no interest in selling you on LTRs. Nor am I interested in "debating" with someone who uses the word "gay" as an argument. Besides, since you are making the more outlandish claim (that men who opt for LTRs are "faggots"), the burden of proof falls on you.

My position is, and always has been, that men should do whatever they think is best for them at their particular point in time, whether that be spinning plates or being in a relationship. You don't want to be in a relationship, that's fine with me, I have no interest in convincing you otherwise.

Hah.. then don't whine when I take a big steaming crap on LTR's.

Remember.. YOU are the one that has an issue with my attacks on LTR's. If you want those attacks to stop then give me good arguments that prove me wrong. Otherwise shut your b!tchin' mouth.

 

[Roober]

There really isn't a lot of good reasons for for LTRs outside of financial stability

Secks? Your downright lying if you think secks with the same person for an extended period of time is better than new pvssy, good or bad
Household? Sounds like you guys want a maid. Focus on yourself, hire a maid
Focus on you? Ya right. in an LTR, she will have things she wants you to do with her. You are going to lose time with your family, and lose time to doing things with her. Your time now includes her family and friends...

Having someone around to share your days with is nice, but even that can get tiring and boring. The monotony of an LTR is inevitable. Anyone who thinks otherwise is just too socially conditioned to admit the truth

 

[BlueAlpha1]

Secks? Your downright lying if you think secks with the same person for an extended period of time is better than new pvssy, good or bad

I disagree with this, but might be biased because I was with a BPD for 4 years. The sex was progressively MORE wild, crazy, strange and addicting as time went on, not less.

Focus on you? Ya right. in an LTR, she will have things she wants you to do with her. You are going to lose time with your family, and lose time to doing things with her. Your time now includes her family and friends...

This I definitely agree with. I can remember dozens of times I got dragged into doing something I couldn't stand spending my day on, but did because I would get good sex later that night.

Having someone around to share your days with is nice, but even that can get tiring and boring. The monotony of an LTR is inevitable. Anyone who thinks otherwise is just too socially conditioned to admit the truth

I agree with this too. I really appreciate my man-cave, especially when my roommate is gone for long periods of time. My cutoff point on being right on top of someone 24/7 is 3-4 days until I'm counting down the hours til I'm alone, and that goes for family and friends too.

 

[TheFixer14]

While it would take A LOT for me to get married at this point, I am not 100% against an LTR and even living with a woman if it includes a few thing.

#1 This woman would have to be without a shadow of a doubt heads over heels for me and vice versa. I've never experienced that either way and honestly I don't think I've ever seen a relationship like that in real life. That's probably one of the reasons like why I like anime and Trinity from the Matrix (the Matrix being heavily influenced by at least three anime shows) because the women in anime and Trinity would do anything for their man. But it makes sense as these are idealized versions of women.

#2 It's a somewhat open relationship where we invite women into our relationship to keep it exciting. I think the idea of being with ONE person for the rest of your life is what kills marriage. Boredom, frustration, and contentiousness set it. The French got it right with how they have their relationships.

I have dabbled in "spinning plates" the most women I've dated at a time being three. I just found it to be too much work for little in return.

 

[ubercat]

I agree with spinning plates as the foundation. But I regard it as being like vaccination. Once u have grasped that no woman is irreplaceable and established your boundaries you re good to go. Every so often when a ltr ends u need a booster shot. This approach minimizes the overhead of plate spinning while keeping your frame intact

 

[exhausted]

I actually mean it kind of literally.

Why would any man want to limit his sexual options in ANY way? When you commit 100% to a woman in a LTR you are basically telling a woman: "I'm so desperate for your companionship that I don't care how often I get laid." This is gay.

I think the ideal situation for normal men is a harem. Men are designed to commit (for child raising), BUT not to be exclusive. Men are NOT designed to be exclusive. The male sexual strategy is to spread his seed. The female strategy is to extract resources and safety for herself and her offspring. The more a woman is able to control a man.. the higher chances of survival for both herself AND her kids as she gets more attention and resources than other women. On the flip side.. the harder it is for a woman to control a man.. the more likely he will spread his seed and resources to more women.

In short.. the more a female follows a male sexual strategy the lower her value. The more a male follows a female sexual strategy, the lower his value. This is why "sluts" are considered failed women and co-dependent betas are failed men. Btw.."slut" doesn't mean easy.. it just means low standards. Just like co-dependent betas have low standards and will commit to anything with a vagina.

After i got divorced i was single banging girls for 7 years. Prob around 15 or more, 4 of those i kept around for a few months for consistent *****, 1 for around 10 months.
Then i got in a 2.5 year ltr...consitent ***** 5 or more times per week is more enjoyable as u progress with a connection and with the right partner just gets better and better.
For me id rather have that consistent ***** that gets better over a long period than strange ons from time to time. Maybe because ive had enough strange and im getting older and lazier when it comes to picking up women. Women are exhausting and most are low quality at this point, random girls dont deserve my energy and time.
Its all relative to what u are looking for.
I forget who it was on here that said he will never get married so he just goes from one ltr to the next every 2- 3 years once the girl gets the hint there is no future of marriage. Consistent pussi and companionship is the goal.
That is where i am at.
Cant trust these women today.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

When I was younger I always thought men who got in to serial LTR with every women they seen were gay. Don't know why. It was like a cloaking mechanism, or maybe it was more complicated than I perceived?
Not saying men are homosexuals if they like or prefer LTRs (As long as they maintain their frame, self respect and value)

Find it funny Poon calls them faggots, I don't know if he means it literally or jokingly or both?

Well those "gay" guys might get a whole bunch of puzzy where they are at. Plus other benefits. No need to screen folks, no need to match schedules, no need for excessive games, etc. Maybe you should look at them as "lazy" instead and trying to find a woman with the same requirement.

 

[Poon King]

I’m totally not against spinning plates, but at this point in my life, it’s not what is best for me. I had pretty good luck with my last LTR(HB8) that lasted almost 5yrs. Its not all doom and gloom like the haters will lead you to believe.

She paid me rent, bought and shopped for the groceries, cleaned the house, paid my phone bill. We split the bill for vacations and going out to eat. She did 80% of the chores around the house. I got sechs any time I wanted it. She always stayed in shape and looked nice. I was the leader of the relationship and she was all about the man being head of house. She even had some assets that benefited me! We took trips together that were way more fun with someone you care about. Because of her I had more time for hobbies and working out. She got a little insecure at times, but the pro’s far outweighed the con’s. The relationship ended because I refused to marry her.

Of course it did.

Women transformed themselves into whatever they believe you want them to be in order to seduce you. The hope is you will fall in line with their secret agenda down the road. You didn't know who this woman was until you said NO to marriage. Then she revealed how deep her "love" really was. The truth does indeed set you free.

I had a similar thing happen to me. Only it was over abortion. She asked me "what if I got pregnant?" I told her she should plan to have an abortion. Killed the relationship instantly.

 

[devilkingx2]

You're asking men to go against their nature which just isn't going to happen.

humanity has been going against its nature for millions of years. otherwise we'd act like apes or monkeys do.

 

[devilkingx2]

Damn straight. You bet I'm demonizing LTR's.

They're generally stupid unless they're somewhat open. I don't teach PUA sh!t. Spinning plates does not harm the market because women care more about LTR's than sex. When a woman is a plate she has to work. She doesn't have some sappy puppy dog faggot at her beck and call to drive her places, buy her sh!t, give her therapy, help her move her furniture, hold her bag when she goes shopping, kill spiders, etc.

I'm a big believer of: "Don't b!tch about it.. do something about it". So if you want me to stop demonizing LTR's you need to provide a good logical argument explaining why they make sense for men. Be specific. So far all I've heard in threads is: "What if I catch a cold?? Who will feed me chicken soup??" And similar gay, fear based, lazy crap.

Give me some good arguments. I'd love to hear them. Otherwise the demonizing will continue.

devil's advocate:

what if you meet a girl who's a millionaire and if you get into an LTR with her you get to live in her mansion and be served champagne by her servants?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

devil's advocate:

what if you meet a girl who's a millionaire and if you get into an LTR with her you get to live in her mansion and be served champagne by her servants?

This is what I'm saying. DJ's need to be smarter and understand that women of MEANS can do more for you. The key is finding them and determining how generous they are.

 

[exhausted]

I’m totally not against spinning plates, but at this point in my life, it’s not what is best for me. I had pretty good luck with my last LTR(HB8) that lasted almost 5yrs. Its not all doom and gloom like the haters will lead you to believe.

She paid me rent, bought and shopped for the groceries, cleaned the house, paid my phone bill. We split the bill for vacations and going out to eat. She did 80% of the chores around the house. I got sechs any time I wanted it. She always stayed in shape and looked nice. I was the leader of the relationship and she was all about the man being head of house. She even had some assets that benefited me! We took trips together that were way more fun with someone you care about. Because of her I had more time for hobbies and working out. She got a little insecure at times, but the pro’s far outweighed the con’s. The relationship ended because I refused to marry her.

The haters call it being lazy, I call it being smart. I saved money and had more time for fun stuff that really mattered.

If you have a woman that thinks its ok to get fat, deny sechs, and not do her part then I question your skills in picking an acceptable partner as well as the frame you maintain. Out of the 3 LTR’s I’ve had, not once did I have these problems that you haters go on and on about.

I'm with ya 100% on the ltr, consistent ***** and companionship. Activities are more enjoyable w

I’m totally not against spinning plates, but at this point in my life, it’s not what is best for me. I had pretty good luck with my last LTR(HB8) that lasted almost 5yrs. Its not all doom and gloom like the haters will lead you to believe.

She paid me rent, bought and shopped for the groceries, cleaned the house, paid my phone bill. We split the bill for vacations and going out to eat. She did 80% of the chores around the house. I got sechs any time I wanted it. She always stayed in shape and looked nice. I was the leader of the relationship and she was all about the man being head of house. She even had some assets that benefited me! We took trips together that were way more fun with someone you care about. Because of her I had more time for hobbies and working out. She got a little insecure at times, but the pro’s far outweighed the con’s. The relationship ended because I refused to marry her.

The haters call it being lazy, I call it being smart. I saved money and had more time for fun stuff that really mattered.

If you have a woman that thinks its ok to get fat, deny sechs, and not do her part then I question your skills in picking an acceptable partner as well as the frame you maintain. Out of the 3 LTR’s I’ve had, not once did I have these problems that you haters go on and on about.

Gay because its based on co-dependence.

Think of the toughest man you know. Now picture him talking about "deep connections". Sounds gay.

Better sex is false. Maybe the first two months the sex is better. Not after that unless she is trying to get pregnant. Even then.. its a case by case thing. Some women are bad in bed. Doesn't matter if you "know them well" or not.

Disagree. All my ltr, all 4, the sex got better over time.
Girls get more comfortable over time and i taught them as well.
Some girls sure it gets worse as they put on a front to please u to get u then get lazy.
Tho if u can consistently make a girl *** she will begin to crave you especially if her past was never orgasming with crappy lovers. Its not all about plowing of course,
Gotta learn the push -pull of increase and decrease pace and intensity among other things.
I read an article about 8 years ago that put me on that next level. Knowledge is power.
My ex, done for a month now, swear to God better and better even to 3 weeks ago, and my God am i depressed about it. She even is withdrawing from me but she is toxic.
I have 3 options right now and i have no excitement of them as no way it will compares to my ex.
****kk that hurts to think about.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Well those "gay" guys might get a whole bunch of puzzy where they are at. Plus other benefits. No need to screen folks, no need to match schedules, no need for excessive games, etc. Maybe you should look at them as "lazy" instead and trying to find a woman with the same requirement

Getting pity ***** is not my ideal. Once you get ***** its all pretty much the same, I have other aspirations besides getting *****. I'm not in high school or college. And there is nothing better than new ***** and sporadic *****, not the same tired worn meat flaps you might worship

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Some of you guys say that LTRs are the easy, and thus lazy, road. Quite the opposite holds true. For LTRs, you need stronger game than plate spinning.

When you spin plates/date, if a girl acts up, you NEXT. Done.

In an LTR, you have to keep IL high, keep her LT deferential, keep a stronger LT frame, direct her whimsicalities, keep desire high (inadvertently). I can see why some choose only to spin plates: it's easy!

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

As Machiavelli said:

"Make mistakes of ambition - not mistakes of sloth. Develop the strength to do bold things - not the strength to suffer."

Machiavelli is misguided. Make no mistakes if you can. Act boldly after thoughtful considerations of consequence. Some mistakes, you will never recover from.

Straw-man argument. I don't do that.

I doubt others do either.

When a women acts up, and you have harem of 3 or 4 others, you give her less attention or walk away completely. Nothing straw about this. It's a fact friend.

Far, far easier to exist within a woman's frame than a man's. And that is true on so many different levels, both within the LTR and without.

If a man's frame were an LTR, and a woman's frame were to spin plates, then would you not be operating in a woman's frame?