why is it bad to say 'its ok dont worry, good luck and have a great week if she says

[pete101]

i'll let you know..?

if a girl texts you she'll let you know i dont know what the right course of action is. i always get this wrong.

if i give a time constraint it back fires.

if i dont say anything, she doesn't let me know.

if she does let me know i say 'i cant make it, i made other plans' then if i ignore her for a few days she'll try to contact me, i dont say anything about meeting up.. eventually she'll suggest we meet up, i state a day/time.. and she somehow comes back to saying 'i'll let u know.'

at this point is it bad for me to say 'it's ok, dont worry, good luck. and have a great week!' ? do i just look bitter?

it seems like all she's tryna do is get me back cos she think she lost me but isnt serious about meeting.

i feel like after a girl says 'i'll let u know' withou a counter offer of a firm day/time she's likely just to flake even if you agree a meeting time next time, am i right?

is it also bad to call them out on 'letting u know' speech? like 'i dont deal with people who dont give me answer other than yes or no with a offer of a day/time?' is this bad?

 

[Tiguere]

ill let you know USUALLY means she will get back to you if nothing else pops up. you will be a last resort type of situation.

you combat this by asking out 2-5 girls out and going with the one that shows the most enthusiasm.

never ask one single girl out and wait on her " ill let you know"

 

[pete101]

ill let you know USUALLY means she will get back to you if nothing else pops up. you will be a last resort type of situation.

you combat this by asking out 2-5 girls out and going with the one that shows the most enthusiasm.

never ask one single girl out and wait on her " ill let you know"

that's exactly what i was thinking, last resort.. but does it make a difference if it's an internet meet up and you've never met before?

i would have expected a counter offer of a specific day. i understand hot girls have lots of options.. but is this also a test to see HOW you react to when she does contact you IF she does?

Also is it bad if she replies with 'i'll let you know' i say: 'i can't meet in that case, it's ok i'll make other plans. have a great weekend!' would this sound bitter? or make me look impatient cos i want an answer then and there? or will it do what i hope and demonstrate that 'i'll let you know' answers are not sufficient?

I feel like once that occurs.. and you dont contact her and if she contacts you to set up a date isn't 'i'll let u know' just a prelude for a future flake? i.e. if u ignore her, she gets interested again but only in trying to get u to agree to a date.. she'll just cancel once you've accepted a time?

 

[gaspipe]

ill let you know USUALLY means she will get back to you if nothing else pops up. you will be a last resort type of situation.

you combat this by asking out 2-5 girls out and going with the one that shows the most enthusiasm.

never ask one single girl out and wait on her " ill let you know"

This. Shes telling you that you are not a priority for her at the moment and you are a back up if all else fails.

I wouldnt want to be in that position, so If a chick tells me this I will toss her number. Self respect and dignity over any ho no matter how hot.

 

[gaspipe]

that's exactly what i was thinking, last resort.. but does it make a difference if it's an internet meet up and you've never met before?

i would have expected a counter offer of a specific day. i understand hot girls have lots of options.. but is this also a test to see HOW you react to when she does contact you IF she does?

Also is it bad if she replies with 'i'll let you know' i say: 'i can't meet in that case, it's ok i'll make other plans. have a great weekend!' would this sound bitter? or make me look impatient cos i want an answer then and there? or will it do what i hope and demonstrate that 'i'll let you know' answers are not sufficient?

I feel like once that occurs.. and you dont contact her and if she contacts you to set up a date isn't 'i'll let u know' just a prelude for a future flake? i.e. if u ignore her, she gets interested again but only in trying to get u to agree to a date.. she'll just cancel once you've accepted a time?

Yes. That is a good description of an attention wh0re.

 

[Jeffst1980]

Usually, it means her interest isn't there. The only non-needy response to this is no response. Just assume she isn't going to contact you and make other plans- if she actually comes through, you can take it from there. NEVER make a flaky girl a priority- this will turn them off.

Saying, "it's ok" just reinforces her belief that she controls the frame. Lashing out in anger just makes you look weak.

Get used to ignoring girls' text messages when they say something that you don't like. Of course, this becomes easier when you have lots of options.

 

[pete101]

Usually, it means her interest isn't there. The only non-needy response to this is no response. Just assume she isn't going to contact you and make other plans- if she actually comes through, you can take it from there. NEVER make a flaky girl a priority- this will turn them off.

Saying, "it's ok" just reinforces her belief that she controls the frame. Lashing out in anger just makes you look weak.

Get used to ignoring girls' text messages when they say something that you don't like. Of course, this becomes easier when you have lots of options.

cos when she said 'i'll let u know' i wrote 'well let me know by saturday otherwise i'll have made plans with someone by then '

she writes back 'in that case it's better if we postpone it as it might clash with my other plans'

i was thinking well wtf why will u let me know then if it's gona clash and u cant let me know by saturday for the next day. like u say a back up. does it not matter it's an internet date and she's not met someone from internet before?

she then adds me to her favorites straight after sending that msg. my thinking is only to be able to see when i log on. i cant see this even being a positive.

i ignored her last msg and will not be contacting her again, if she contacts me i'll give her 1 line answers with a at the end in case i look bitter but no mention of a meet up or time. if she says 'i think it's time we met up then.' i'll say 'i guess so ' but never actually offer a time. is this right? or if i do set up a time with her, just cancel?

 

[pete101]

Usually, it means her interest isn't there. The only non-needy response to this is no response. Just assume she isn't going to contact you and make other plans- if she actually comes through, you can take it from there. NEVER make a flaky girl a priority- this will turn them off.

Saying, "it's ok" just reinforces her belief that she controls the frame. Lashing out in anger just makes you look weak.

Get used to ignoring girls' text messages when they say something that you don't like. Of course, this becomes easier when you have lots of options.

i just realised why this bothers me so much, it's clear i got oneitis and dont have any other options (but not for lack of trying) i spent all of today sarging but only 1 number which i dont even think is a date cos she gave it to me to cut the convo short cos she had stuff to do.. i had no time to run any game.

if i have no options and only 1 is it pointless me pursuing it cos i'lll inevitably fail?

im in a rut recently.. all this sarging, no numbers, if i do get any they dont answer their phone. i think it's the reason why i put so much focus on this internet 1 cos it seems the most tangible as crazy as it sounds.

 

[pete101]

Even if you aren't doing well out there, that's still better then getting hooked on one girl who keeps flaking on you. Keep at it. You"ll only get better.

And as far as this girl goes, you're not really going to play it off cool no matter what you say. Lose her number. If she gets in touch and wants to meet, ask what time. If she doesn't give you a straight answer, don't say anything. Just lose her number again. Don't keep rewarding her with an interest level if she isn't giving you anything to be interested in.

I should mention its a date off POF an internet dating site. she hasn't internet dated before but the fact she has joined a site means she's obviously open to meeting people from the internet or just wants attention. for all i know she's met 3 guys this week. i shouldn't think about it nor care.

but if i do endup meeting her im going to be very wary about her after pulling this stunt on me.. makes me kinda not want to be the guy who was msging her originally which she appeared interested in. feels like im supplicating too much. like the interaction between me and her isn't pure and amicable anymore cos of the games shes playing.

everything is written in our messages, she hasn't even given me her number yet (partly cos i said i didn't need it - i dont really wanna talk to her on the phone before we meet if i dont have to, my phone game is my weakest part)

if she says to me 'well if you want to meet up you know what to do' as in instead offering me a time she makes me try to offer a time. what should my response be?