Why does chasing women sometimes pay off?

[DiegoSantori]

I've heard of situations where a guy chases a woman for like 6 months and she eventually gives in and goes on a date with him. My question is why?

Because she is lacking other options? Because she wants to make someone else jealous? Because she suddenly considers him worthy enough?

 

[prison/con.net]

Cause she's bored. Cause she decides that somebody who wants her THAT much is worth checking into. Cause she wants a free movie and meal. Cause she heard something about him that interests her.

 

[thatfeel]

The only good long-term/analytical reason would be is that she realized she can't lock down an alpha or that she's completely desperate and has no other options, literally. There's a post around here that talks about how men chasing women like that are akin to a bird who wants to fly into a cage; women don't want a bird that wants to be caged. So for her to want such a creature the dynamics would have to benefit her in some way that mask the future deception to come (e.g. she uses him for beta utility but he doesn't get back all the amazing pedestalized features that he was expecting, like constant sex or whatever, who knows, could be anything.

Or yes, she just wants a free movie and a meal. True fckin' story right there.

The guy in this situation is already in a losing position at any rate.

 

[pyros]

I believe it is because after she's played the field enough time, and has tried several options and she's gotten burned a few times...she may think 'logically' that this guy that is SO INTO HER, an TREATS HER LIKE A QUEEN, and would do ANYTHING FOR HER, is a "good" option, eventhough she may not find him "that" attractive. Besides, when someone likes you more than you like him/her, you have the power of the relationship.

She settles, so to speak.

 

[Mike32ct]

I believe it is because after she's played the field enough time, and has tried several options and she's gotten burned a few times...she may think 'logically' that this guy that is SO INTO HER, an TREATS HER LIKE A QUEEN, and would do ANYTHING FOR HER, is a "good" option, eventhough she may not find him "that" attractive. Besides, when someone likes you more than you like him/her, you have the power of the relationship.

She settles, so to speak.

^This. After a while, she takes the path of least resistance and gives in.

 

[JohnyTheArrow]

I believe it is because after she's played the field enough time, and has tried several options and she's gotten burned a few times...she may think 'logically' that this guy that is SO INTO HER, an TREATS HER LIKE A QUEEN, and would do ANYTHING FOR HER, is a "good" option, eventhough she may not find him "that" attractive. Besides, when someone likes you more than you like him/her, you have the power of the relationship.

She settles, so to speak.

Well said.

Oh, you forgot the ending ... 'And few years later she cheats/dumps/divorce him' because passion rules all.If woman needs logic to be with a man it's lost case for him, she will not be happy and she will punish him for her unhappiness.Imagine you waited for hot girl to be your wife and then you had to settle down for single mom or fat chick, she may be amazingly good person for you but you still will be bitter inside and it will poison relationship.

Everybody wants to feel like winner not like a looser, thats many beta guys are discared after use, because woman FELT with them like she was a loser by settling down with them.If you werent BIG NO 1 for the chick do not settle down with her.

That's you hear bullshyt from women like ... 'Where have you been ? I waited for you my whole life'

 

[GS750]

I know a guy who chased this one girl for a long time. She finally relented but then moved about 2,000 miles away. She kept him in a LDR for about 2 years, but she played the field while she was gone...which included fvcking her ex who lived not far away. So she strung him along while she did her thing. He had no clue she was still seeing her ex. When she was done and realized it wasn't gonna work out with the ex, she moved back and they got married. She walks all over this guy, it's almost painful to watch. So yeah he chased her for a long time. He finally got her. But she owns his balls. I see family photos of these two people with their three kids, looking all happy. He has no clue she was slvtting around behind his back while he was home waiting for her. He sure as hell wasn't NO.1 for her. No way to live IMO.

 

[JohnyTheArrow]

Guys who think they can win girl by chasing should ask different question ...

Would she let Bratt Pitt chase her ?
Would she let rich man chase here ?
ok ... something less extreme
Would she let man of her dreams chase her and risking losing him to other woman ?

If you chase her, you are simply not good enough to be accepted instantly, she must feed her ego with you as doormat because you must pay for 'inferiority'.

And then pay and pay forever, even if you 'win' such woman you will end as lower rank because you established bad frame.If you chased and chased for long it means your value is lower because you werent able to walk away or find better girl.And BTW you didnt 'win' the woman, it was she who 'accepted' you after establishing superior power frame for herself.

1.Chase
2.Stop
3.If she chases back - game is worth - if not
4.Move on

 

[WanderingMan]

There's ways to flip this once you do get her to go out with you. I've never personally done it because I haven't chased a woman in over 20 years. I have seen it done though. There is some Alpha in going after what you want, but it's a fine line between being her ***** boy - doing whatever she wants you to do - and keeping your power while convincing/seducing her. There is a way to 'chase'. (Like I said - I've seen it done, but never done it myself.

She may have a million options, but eventually, like was said above, she may relent and finally go out with you. As long as you know what you're doing (have game) andhave got her out one on one, I don't think it's too uncommon to have the opportunity to flip the switches and spike her attraction for you.

 

[El Payaso]

She exhausted all her other options. Besides, the guy will be a miserable beta in the relationship.

 

[WorkHardPlayHard]

She's settling. The guy she wants upgraded and she needs validation. Unless it's a RomCom, I doubt it's going to end well for the back-up guy.

 

[Suspens]

Simple: one man's trash is another man's treasure


The alpha boys pumped&dumped her like a piece of trash. They are gone forever now, and it's time to desperately look for every number in her (Weak orbiter fags) category on her contacts list.

Embrace your treasure, you finally got it. Good things come to those who wait :crackup:

Cause she decides that somebody who wants her THAT much is worth checking into

Yes. Sometimes that's the case.

 

[skinnyguy]

Who knows maybe the guy passed her sh*t tests.

Kind of like when you got laid on the 5th date. You wanted it on the 1st but she didn't give in easily.

Some guys think every single woman is getting pumped and dumped, but I don't buy it. Just because she dates him does not mean she's settling. Since women get so much attention these days according to SoSuave im sure most women don't need to settle for a really beta guy.

Or, maybe he took an RSD bootcamp LOL

 

[DiegoSantori]

Interesting replies so far. Thank you, guys. I'm trying to see things from a womans' perspective and actually, it's not that difficult to do that because I know how it feels when someone is chasing you. Recently, some chicks were really persistent in chasing me.

On the one hand, it boosted my ego of course, on the other hand, I was a bit scared because I didn't know if some of these women would take it too far and do some crazy sh** in their obsession with me. Thank god, all of them figured out after a while that I was just not interested. I guess, some of them had thought that they could change my mind and regarded my lack of interest in them as a "challenge" but even the most persistent woman gets the message if you keep ignoring her for months.

On the one hand, I feel flattered and consider the possibility of giving her a chance since she must be really interested in me, on the other hand, there's a reason why I'm not as interested in her as she is in me and I'm not the type of man to throw my standards out the window just because I feel sorry for her or because I admire her persistence.

 

[PimpOfTheSouth]

I think as a guy you can minimally chase and turn things in your favor. I've done it several times and i've seen it done successfully. Im not saying chase the girl 24/7 but a little persistence overtime can definitely pay off. The way I see it also is maybe chasing at first does give her a bit of power but if you are a man that is successful at anything you should have no problem flipping the power. Like we see in so many relationships the power often flips if you are smart you should know how to play a small situation like this back into your favor.

 

[amazingswayze]

the reason it pays off is because the guy finally gets the pu$$y he put on a pedestal.
however, i see many more cons than pros in this situation.
on the woman's behalf, it's because she has nothing better to do.
why waste your time on a woman for this long?

 

[devilkingx2]

since everyone here has already posted all possible negative reasons i thought i would post up some reasons where this might turn out well IRL

1. i hear that all that matters to women is the man you are at this moment, so if 6 months ago you were an unattractive loser, then you turned yourself into a badass while chasing her, that might get her.

2. if she went through something lifechanging and learned a lesson. careful with this one, people tend to resist changing, but it's theoretically possible she realized how dumb it was to ignore someone who liked her for no good reason(translation: she decided that chasing guys who don't give a crap about her because they were hot has only screwed her over in the past)

most people would call #2 settling, but if she's a good woman she won't see it that way, she'll see it as maturing. (sort of like when us guys realize that only chasing and dating the hottest big boobed slvts we can find isn't the best idea in the world)

 

[DragonBlood]

I know a guy who chased this one girl for a long time. [...] He had no clue she was still seeing her ex. When she was done and realized it wasn't gonna work out with the ex, she moved back and they got married. [...] I see family photos of these two people with their three kids, looking all happy.

So what you are saying is that, if I stop trying to be so alpha and indifferent, and actually show the girl I care and want her.... In the long run she will drop the aloof "alphas", she will reproduce with me and go exclusive.

Seems ****ing irrelevant and laughable if she played her options or not, the guy who gets her pregnant is the obvious winner.

 

[GS750]

Maybe in his mind he's the winner. What I was saying is that she had him locked into a long distance relationship, cheated on him with her ex, put off marrying him until she decided it wasn't going to work out with the other guy, and then she moved back home and married the guy she was cheating on. He chased her for about 2 years before they actually hooked up. My point was his time may have been better spent pursuing someone who was actually into him rather than chasing a slvt who finally gave in because he wore her down, but moved 2000 miles away anyway, strung him along until she figured out what she was gonna do, and then eventually moved home and married him. He's not the winner in my opinion. His wife bosses him around and walks all over him. Plus she cheated on him. So, he knocked her up finally and had three kids with her. She still played him and strung him along.

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

Watch the movie "The Wedding Ringer." You'll see the exact dynamics of this situation play out.