Why do we post on SoSuave?

[Man Of Adventure]

"I wish the old-timers were still here because they didnt give a damn about recognition. They did it for themselves instead of everyone else."- Man Of Adventure

This is true and they brought a lot of quality information, helped change my self and views. But you see the problem is, when they post replies, and 15 guys start calling them "keyboard jockeys," "losers who have no time," "post a pic on here so I can see ya' body.." type of shyt, that makes someone not wanna put their effort into posting serious information on here anymore, and quite frankly I don't blame them.

I wish the moderators would make rules about flaming and trolling. So when a guy does it he's kicked off. Only when the flaming and trolling ends, will this site be taking as seriously as it "could" and you'll log in and see quality information all up and down the forum, it'll be worth the while to read and we all can continue growing. But too much flaming, too many "bored people posting bullshyt", it's just too much dumb stuff going on.

I believe this site is taken quite seriously...in fact too seriously. Its to the point where we go and debate about the little things. Its a good thing to do that. It really is. That means that were exhausting our resourses and were trying to perfect ideas.

Its bad though, because we are not finding breakthroughs to the community as quickly as how people did in the past. Like what everybody says "We have the stuff already posted if you look"

So we may find our own discoveries which is great and well post it, but there will be guys that are like "No ****? I knew that already dumbass." or when they post they will post in this kind of attitude "Look at me noobies, I got one phone number." LOL...I do think its kind of hilarious that people brag here about getting phone numbers or banging so many girls.

We dont have to be perfect guys. As negative as it may seem to not want to be the best at this, its good to not take this so seriously. Since we needlessly spend our time debating the perfect words to say when you meet a girl, the perfect way to look, the perfect way to hold your beer, the perfect way to have a 90 degree angle when ****ing her doggystyle, I know were getting somewhere. We just have different views on the best way to go about stuff. We need an open mind nomatter how "experienced" we are.

Face it, there will be some new breakthrough sometime Im sure...but how much more is there that we really need to "know" when we could actually be out there doing it when we want to in our sparetime.

When we are around girls, I will assume we know more than the average guy because we were determined to go about learning this stuff. Knowledge is power and we all have plenty more than alot of other guys. Were ahead of the curve. Id almost say that were insecure because were so serious about this. Why not just have fun with it? Having fun IS attractive to every girl...

 

[Man Of Adventure]

I don't post all that often, but I visit about 2 times per week usually through my PDA while I sit at the office (my job blocked this site lol).

I, as some of the other good people here read to improve myself (not only my pick-up technique).
I came here a long time ago and after reading a lot of the materials on this site and talking to some of the good people here (most of whom left I believe) I became more secure with myself, I worked on myself, I looked for validation only within myself, and I learned a few nice moves to have some fun with the girlies .
I agree with the OP that a lot of people post (boast really) how their so awesome or w/e, but all the good people here know they are only seeking validation or acknowledgement and we either ignore them or point it out.

I stay because their are still good people here... ...Their visits and posts aren't as frequent as they once were... ...And, their are still AFCs coming here that have a chance of redeeming themselves and at least being able to become in control on oneself enough to change some of their 'bad' behavior and begin their journey to helping themselves become happier with themselves and the world around them (that or changing one of the two to make themselves happier).

I remember once reading (here I believe) that being a DJ or Alpha Male was more about self control, self improvement, and self contentment.
Although, some of us are the kind of people that can never be completely content and always want more… That is our curse


If you read this reply…
Congratulations!
Now I’m going to sleep.

I respect you.

 

[INXS]

I believe this site is taken quite seriously...in fact too seriously. Its to the point where we go and debate about the little things. Its a good thing to do that. It really is. That means that were exhausting our resourses and were trying to perfect ideas.

Its bad though, because we are not finding breakthroughs to the community as quickly as how people did in the past. Like what everybody says "We have the stuff already posted if you look"

So we may find our own discoveries which is great and well post it, but there will be guys that are like "No ****? I knew that already dumbass." or when they post they will post in this kind of attitude "Look at me noobies, I got one phone number." LOL...I do think its kind of hilarious that people brag here about getting phone numbers or banging so many girls.

We dont have to be perfect guys. As negative as it may seem to not want to be the best at this, its good to not take this so seriously. Since we needlessly spend our time debating the perfect words to say when you meet a girl, the perfect way to look, the perfect way to hold your beer, the perfect way to have a 90 degree angle when ****ing her doggystyle, I know were getting somewhere. We just have different views on the best way to go about stuff. We need an open mind nomatter how "experienced" we are.

Face it, there will be some new breakthrough sometime Im sure...but how much more is there that we really need to "know" when we could actually be out there doing it when we want to in our sparetime.

When we are around girls, I will assume we know more than the average guy because we were determined to go about learning this stuff. Knowledge is power and we all have plenty more than alot of other guys. Were ahead of the curve. Id almost say that were insecure because were so serious about this. Why not just have fun with it? Having fun IS attractive to every girl...

It is true. I mean people on here do get carried away. However, it seems that A LOT of men in the "real world" can't even get past their inner worryworts to even consider saying a simple "Hi" to an attractive woman. And here we are, debating over, which ****y and funny opener works THE BEST. I am pleased to say the least with where this place's knowledge and each other's shared info/tips have gotten us this far..and I'm new! :cheer: Big ups to everyone!:woo:

 

[izza]

True, many people (including myself, by the way) post here for the recognition. It's a really stupid reason, but if I help people I feel proud of myself. That's what it comes down to.

All people already know how to be a DJ, socially speaking. Most people believe that it is a learned process which involves the accumulation of experience, like memorizing vocabulary or theorems for example. Social knowledge appears to be gained by experience, but it is not. All people over the age of say 15 already have enough social experience and experience of self-reflection to intuitively understand how others work, and to be a social being. Attractiveness is another issue, but one that reading cannot do anything about. Reading can help us reveal and understand the silent intuitions about others we have already gained. One major problem on this site is that people follow advice that they don't understand. You only "understand" advice once you realize how it alignes with knowledge you already have. For example being a jack@ss just because jerks get women fails miserably. The only use of the advice that when you read it, you think back of a conversation you had with Jane where you wanted to be nice but you really wanted to make a rude joke, etc. You must realize AFTER THE FACT that making that rude joke would have been hilarious. Maybe Jane would have slept with you, rather than throwing you like a football into the friendzone.

The real process of learning is one where old habits and models of thinking are broken in favor of another. No post can change our model of thinking. We must intend for it to change. But we must be convinced to change our model of thinking. It is a paradox (a stolen one by the way), but it is at the heart of what we do. Once we are convinced to change, most posts lose their value.

Thus In the ideal, a post serves two ends: convincing someone that they want to change, and helping explain situations remarked already by the reader, but not understood.

People that read and read are just looking for a miracle post. They are lazy. The real work of being a DJ is analysis of one's life and experiences and reactions. Talk to anybody, ANY DJ, and he will say he had at some point kept a journal. And not a journal on sosuave, where basically everyone has a macho cool façade to upkeep their reputation and their authority as experts. No, a journal must be kept privately.

In the end, it's kind of a shame though. Lots of people post on sosuave, but many just waste their time and gain very little. The truth is, if you want to be a DJ, you have to go it alone. Sosuave gives a little push, makes it sound really easy, can give a great idea or inspiration every now and again, but that's it.

Izza

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I try and impart some acquired experience to some of the newcomers... I find in doing so, i'm able to keep my own thoughts in check and often re-internalize the advice I give so that it becomes even deeper engrained in my head.

I find that lately, this place has turned into a negative emotion breeding ground. there's a lot of women hating going on, for valid reasons, nonetheless; but I try and not take any of that sh!t in. I'd rather hold women in high esteem then become a hating mysoginist like some of the poor saps on here. In the end, I'd only be sabotaging my own success by harbouring distrust.

And, I don't mind just hanging out here every now and again to see how some of my favporite posters are doing.

 

[realsmoothie]

I try and impart some acquired experience to some of the newcomers... I find in doing so, i'm able to keep my own thoughts in check and often re-internalize the advice I give so that it becomes even deeper engrained in my head.

I find that lately, this place has turned into a negative emotion breeding ground. there's a lot of women hating going on, for valid reasons, nonetheless; but I try and not take any of that sh!t in. I'd rather hold women in high esteem then become a hating mysoginist like some of the poor saps on here. In the end, I'd only be sabotaging my own success by harbouring distrust.

And, I don't mind just hanging out here every now and again to see how some of my favporite posters are doing.

Yeah. I was at this board a couple of years ago under a different name, and things were much more relaxed then. Now there seems to be a lot of misogyny going on, blaming women for the troubles of the modern world and for why guys aren't getting laid. Right, let's go back to the old days where you were paired up for life at 15...

I come to this board for a few reasons. The atmosphere is interesting, with lots of guys of different nations and ages... and degrees of experiences. I like occasionally posting for some advice, and usually get good responses. And sometimes I'll even be able to GIVE some advice to a poor sod who is in a worse situation than me.

 

[Q-Pid]

I post here to keep in touch with Shezz and a few others when they're not in the top secret Carpe PM forums.

England is becoming a Nexus of PUA/DJ mania!

 

[GatorBait]

I just started posting here, so this may be a little different:

I started posting because it keeps me in the right mindset for picking up girls. That was always my weakness. I'd have all the tools to be able to go out and pick up girls (have done it many times before), but sometimes I would just get lazy and not put forth any effort. Posting here keeps me in the right frame of mind. Plus, it also affords me the chance to learn. No matter how much you know, you're never done learning.

Also, I know a lot of guys out there that are full of potential, but they just haven't been able to tap it and refine it. My current roommate is a 23 year old virgin and he's never had a real girlfriend (hell, the first time he saw a live woman naked was at a stripshow last year). He goes out every weekend trying so hard to pick up girls, but nothing ever happens. He's not a bad looking guy at all, but he commits so many mistakes that it's near impossible for him hook up, but I've been slowly trying to mold him (he's stubborn and doesn't take real well to advice). I know there are guys on this board just like my roommate - with a little bit of guidance they can no doubt achieve the goals they are looking for. I'm also posting here to share what I know with these guys and to see them reach their goals.

 

[Blackdragon5095]

What I think

Why do we post on SoSuave?

I'm not sure why everyone else posts on here. I'll tell why some guys post on here.

To me: Their are 2 kinds of people on this fourm. I see a big line between the 2. Their are people who wanna be famous on here and people wanna improve.

The people who wanna be famous.
These losers will post anything to make theirselfs look good and post at least 20 to more posts a day. Trying to prove something to everyone. These guys only try dj stuff on girls they already know, not out apporaching girls. This kind of people usally gets banned or people see them as a idoit because they are idoits. They will sooner or later get tired of having their accounts banned or everyone will realize they are a idoit and ignore their posts and they get mad because no one pays any attention to them and go somewhere else for attention.

The people who wanna improve.
This is me, I don't wanna be famous, I don't wanna run around say I got laid. When I'm actually a vigirn. I made many mistakes in my life and I want to be a better man. I don't look for attention. I like being around other players, pua and djs. Also I learned quite alot being here just for allmost 1 year. And I had a huge change. Even my friends and family notice my new confidnce and attudie.

Ego builds confidence.....confidence builds success.....Go Figure

I don't want a stupid ego that says this. " If pick up a girl that makes me a man " Picking up a girl dosen't make you a man. You can be a pua and not even be a real man. What I'm here to do is become a real man. First I want to be good with women. After that I get better with myself and get more confidence not for women but for me. Then get a better job or career and so on.
Guys who have stupid egos are afaid of risk and mistakes. Don't have egos. Have confidence, be open. If you make mistake, learn from it and move on. Take risk so you can do something postive with your life. Not just stick to the same thing.

Guys that never have anything personal to share (FR, LR, DR, WR) are the ones that suck in my book. I also hate how guys present themselves as GURUS of the game, but later lose their cool when criticized. We can't forget the guys who do nothing, but doubt and complain….

We have the dj bible, Mystery, David DeAngelo, Gunwitch, juggler and other good stuff. Guys don't read it because they wanna be famous. They think ( F### reading this I want to be popular on this fourm) and start posting up fake stuff and bullcrap. Their are guys who post up good stuff. I'm not kissing this guy's ass but Sapiens stuff is good. I seen tons of guys bash him out of jealously. Self-Mastery I do agree guys who don't want help theirselfs become a real man, are true losers and have no life.

I think the real trick is to get out in the field and to attack our insecurities, whatever they might be

100% TRUE !!!
Thats why we have so many guys in this world who don't want to do anything with their life.

You have to reach a level of comfort with that risk.
Sally Ride

"The greatest mistake a man can make is to be afraid of making one." Elbert Hubbard

I was at first afaid to apporach a girl in a girl's store with thongs and bras everywhere. But my wingman help me do it and now I can do it and can care less with other people think. People wanna hold on to these stupid egos.

Ego: If I get dissed I would look so uncool infront of everyone
Ego: If apporach that girl she will laugh at me
Ego: Girls are out of my reality

Whats wrong with this world ?
Is no one wants to make mistakes & take risk. As long as they sit on their ass at home watching T.V., these guys will never be a true confidence man.

As long as guys on this forum want to run around trying to be become famous.
Trying to prove theirself to everyone.
Trying to offer advice to other guys when they haven't even apporached 1 girl yet.

They will never know what true freedom from fear is !

You got girls spending $500.00 a month on makeup trying to look pretty for guys.

You got girls wearing booty shorts and shaking their ass in clubs trying to get a guy to apporach them.

You got girls staring guys down as hard and as long as they can hoping that guy will apporach. Even smiling !!

You got girls bored out of thier mind because they need a real man to to bring joy to their life.

And you don't wanna apporach because your afaid some stupid girl is gonna say " No I don't wanna talk to you " LMAO !!! :crackup:

No wonder why we don't have many great men who wanna improve their lives. Just lazy cowards who hide behind walls.
( no offense to you good guys)

 

[Jariel]

I try and impart some acquired experience to some of the newcomers... I find in doing so, i'm able to keep my own thoughts in check and often re-internalize the advice I give so that it becomes even deeper engrained in my head.

I find that lately, this place has turned into a negative emotion breeding ground. there's a lot of women hating going on, for valid reasons, nonetheless; but I try and not take any of that sh!t in. I'd rather hold women in high esteem then become a hating mysoginist like some of the poor saps on here. In the end, I'd only be sabotaging my own success by harbouring distrust.

Once again, I agree with your every word!

I'm here for the same reason. I like to give back to this forum that gave so much to me by helping guys like me when I first came here. And I too find that it helps me keep my thoughts engrained and keeps me motivated.

But yes it is a real shame that there is so much negativity and bitterness being preached here. This is how most guys feel after being rejected or dumped by women and lose faith. This site should be about restoring their faith and motivating them to get out there and enjoy the company of women and enjoy life!

 

[spider_007]

Why do i post her (dayly)???

because i'm addicted to this freaking site. I'm sitting here at work, not perticularly buissy....thinking what should i do to make the day go by a little faster.....and it's always been "sosuave"......

I can't remember the last time i loged in from home.

I wish there was another forum/chat that had as much trafic, and was as much fun that i could go to instead of this one....

 

[Man Of Adventure]

For example being a jack@ss just because jerks get women fails miserably.

I notice a lot of my younger friends about 17-19 are trying the whole being the ******* deal and failing quite miserably. I sense how they come from the whole I need this girl I wanna **** this girl mentality. Thats what ****s things up for them.

Youre right, mindset can make the rudest thing seem as the doormattiest thing ever. Watch some of your friends that dont understand what being an ******* is all about.

Dont take it from me because I said this. I make mistakes as well like everybody here. Just watch your friends that try to act like *******s just to get girls.

There are though, *******s, that really do understand the process and get girls. There are some *******s Im sure you can learn good concepts from because they dont come from being needy. I wont lie to you about that. Im sure youve heard a big spiel about the mentally abusive guys that get girls. Its true. I just dont do it in my own life.

Id rather say hey use some c&f if you have a good grasp because its rather makes fun than cause fear in the eyes of a woman especially if you are physically attractive. Looks are a big deal when you try to use some c&f.

By the way...I got your message. Talk to me anytime.

 

[Yuriy777]

I respect you.

Thanks Champ