Why do some women give their real phone numbers wihout an intention to speak to you?

[wutang180]

one thing I really don't get about women. Is why do they say they'll give you their phone number without any attempt to actually speak to you. The past 2 women that I have spoken to did this shlt to me.They both gave me their phone number but when I call the phone rings and rings and no answer. Every 5 calls I'll probably get a *69 back once to speak but for only no more 20 minutes. Is their an unspoken rule that if a female doesn't like a guy, they give them their phone number anway without any intention to speak to them.
Damn I just want to know.

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"the only risk that u take in life is not taking any risk at all"
( http://i.am/thesource )

 

[XCMan]

Cause they get a kick out of it.

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In the rooms, the women come and go/ Talking of Michealangelo

 

[Armand]

Originally posted by wutang180:
one thing I really don't get about women. Is why do they say they'll give you their phone number without any attempt to actually speak to you. The past 2 women that I have spoken to did this shlt to me.They both gave me their phone number but when I call the phone rings and rings and no answer.

How did you go about getting these numbers, how did you ask? How did the conversation go prior to asking? How did she react to your asking - body language/facial expression/ verbal response. How soon are you calling them after getting the number?

Every 5 calls I'll probably get a *69 back once to speak but for only no more 20 minutes. Is their an unspoken rule that if a female doesn't like a guy, they give them their phone number anway without any intention to speak to them.
Damn I just want to know.

From a certain point of view, yes - that "unspoken rule," is called reality.

Women won't say no right out, in most cases, and if she can't think of an quick excuse not to give it to you, she'll go ahead, being "polite," and give it to you hoping she'll never be home when you call. They do this because they know that the male ego is the most fragile thing in the world, and in some cases hysterical when deflated.

In a perfect world, women say "no," or "not interested," right then and save us the trouble of time and phone charges.

But we don't live in a perfect world, and most guys women encounter couldn't handle a flat "no" anyway because they take it personally.

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Definition Of Insanity: Doing what you've always done and expecting things to change.

[This message has been edited by Armand (edited 11-04-2000).]

 

[BigBadJon]

One of my female friends told me she does this sh1t all the time. When I asked her why, she says "I give lots of guys my #. Most of the time they never call anyways." I know, that doesn't answer the question.

I think it's not being able to say "no", and in some cases they just plain love to feel wanted.

 

[Armand]

Originally posted by BigBadJon:
One of my female friends told me she does this sh1t all the time. When I asked her why, she says "I give lots of guys my #. Most of the time they never call anyways." I know, that doesn't answer the question.

I think it's not being able to say "no", and in some cases they just plain love to feel wanted.

Yes, THOSE make up a percentage of women that I overlooked in my post above: The ones that simply have no self esteem and do this number on guys they are even repulsed by, all for a temporary boost of themselves. They deserve their fate.

 

[BigBadJon]

Originally posted by Armand:
Yes, THOSE make up a percentage of women that I overlooked in my post above: The ones that simply have no self esteem and do this number on guys they are even repulsed by, all for a temporary boost of themselves. They deserve their fate.

I think she just may fall into that category, even though she's not bad looking.

 

[Armand]

Originally posted by BigBadJon:
I think she just may fall into that category, even though she's not bad looking.

I once thought that good looking-to-beautiful women couldn't possibly have no or low self-esteem because their whole lives have been one compliment after another.

I met one when I moved here, my brother's g/f. She used to be a model for one of those motorcycle mags. You know, the ones with the almost naked goddesses strattling in ways/directions no man ever could?

Well, she is the most insecure beautiful woman i've ever met. She's got an ego like a man's - easily wounded. Highly volitile, emotionally. Frequent outbursts.

Then again, it may just be an inferiority complex. She's not very bright.

Here's an example of a women with attitude problem. She's good looking, a giver (according to my brother), but has a shakey attitude which, to me, is enough to lower her level of attractiveness. I know she wouldn't be good relationship material for me, but i'm not as superficial and satisfied with looks as my brother is.

Attitude is vital in the equation.

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Definition Of Insanity: Doing what you've always done and expecting things to change.

 

[wutang180]

How did you go about getting these numbers, how did you ask? How did the conversation go prior to asking? How did she react to your asking - body language/facial expression/ verbal response. How soon are you calling them after getting the number

Ok i'll tell you how I got the number for the last one. I spoke to the girl made her laugh a little, talked about upcoming social events, asked her a few questions but convo was only about 5 minutes cause I had to get to class. She seemed pretty relaxed, but we were both in a hurry to get to class.She responded to my questions and did not make any hesistations. The 2 mistakes that I think that I did was break the Don Juan 5 day rule and I said "can I call you up some time" instead of "What's ur nubmer"(which I have problems saying cause it is down right rude and plus I knew her for at least 3 weeks somewhat so I don't thhink that would be polite of me). Instead of 5 days I waited about 2 days cause I already scheduled a date for 5 days after I got the number. So, I thought that there was no need to play games. However, when I called her up, she said that she was unable to make it, because her father wanted her to stay home and study, because it was a school day but that's understandable. Oh well, even though I have gotten quite a few numbers and dated in my life(I'm 20) , I am still clueless about women at times. Damn I wish women could just be straight forward and tell me,"I have a "boyfriend" or "let me get ur number instead" so that I know that they are not interested at all. Well, talk to ya lata.and pls comment

 

[obidexx]

Originally posted by wutang180:
one thing I really don't get about women. Is why do they say they'll give you their phone number without any attempt to actually speak to you. The past 2 women that I have spoken to did this shlt to me.They both gave me their phone number but when I call the phone rings and rings and no answer. Every 5 calls I'll probably get a *69 back once to speak but for only no more 20 minutes. Is their an unspoken rule that if a female doesn't like a guy, they give them their phone number anway without any intention to speak to them.
Damn I just want to know.

To test you.


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Obidexx under the sun (32).

 

[BigBadJon]

Originally posted by wutang180:
The 2 mistakes that I think that I did was break the Don Juan 5 day rule and I said "can I call you up some time" instead of "What's ur nubmer"(which I have problems saying cause it is down right rude and plus I knew her for at least 3 weeks somewhat so I don't think that would be polite of me).

I have said "can I call you up sometime?", or "would you like to go out sometime" and many variations of both, and the only thing it has ever managed to do is make me come off as weak.

When you phrase it that way, she hears "is there any way you could possibly find it in your heart to grace a loser like me with your presence?".

"What's your number?" is not rude. It is direct. Last night I was out with friends fro a bachelor party. A buddy of mine was dancing about 10 feet from a girl on a crowded dance floor. He made eye contact and motioned her over to him. She obediently came to him and they danced fro about an hour.

Now, let me ask you something. What do you think his chances would have been if he had walked over and asked her to dance with him? I say slim to none.

If you have known this girl for weeks you should be even more comfortable being forward with her.

I am still clueless about women at times. Damn I wish women could just be straight forward and tell me,"I have a "boyfriend" or "let me get ur number instead" so that I know that they are not interested at all. Well, talk to ya lata.and pls comment

I am 29 and still clueless with women at times. But I have been through more than my share of mistakes, and not taking what I want instead of begging for it has been one of my major fumbles.

I agree. The world would be a much better place if women were more forward with telling us they aren't interested. Too bad we don't have the power to change the world.



[This message has been edited by BigBadJon (edited 11-05-2000).]

 

[Don Juanita]

WEll, I wish I could tell you, but I no longer have an answer to that question anymore.

THE REASON:

Because you guys do it too.

Juanita

 

[Survivor]

Originally posted by Don Juanita:
WEll, I wish I could tell you, but I no longer have an answer to that question anymore.

THE REASON:

Because you guys do it too.

Juanita

Please explain.

 

[Poet]

Absolutely correct...."What's your phone number?" or even "Give me your phone #" Is the way to go....that is direct & it is neiter rude nor weak..."care to go out sometime?" "Can I give you a call sometime?" Weak weak weak weak ****! Even "would you like to dance?" Negative...."Let's dance" better....I mean last night when I got my two numbers I told them "I need to get both your phone numbers" & they gave.....I didn't beg...

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Action is all....words don't mean ****.

Trust your instincts & nothing else.

 

[BigBadJon]

Originally posted by Poet:
Absolutely correct...."What's your phone number?" or even "Give me your phone #" Is the way to go....that is direct & it is neiter rude nor weak..."care to go out sometime?" "Can I give you a call sometime?" Weak weak weak weak ****! Even "would you like to dance?" Negative...."Let's dance" better....I mean last night when I got my two numbers I told them "I need to get both your phone numbers" & they gave.....I didn't beg...

I've mentioned before that a girl that I totally wanted to hook up with gave me her # out of the blue one day, while I was still trying to work up the nerve to ask her out.

Now I know that most of you guys say that it is a bad sign when a woman makes the moves, but this girl is 100% straight up. She wasn't coming on strong when she handed me her #. It was a "matter of fact kind" of thing.

From what I can gather after the fact, she had genuine interest when she gave me the digits. Why would a gorgeous 20 yr old bartender want me calling her up if she wasn't at least curious about me? I am sure she was aware that I was attracted to her when she did this.

Assuming this is true, I would say I foecked it up at some point during the first call. I called too soon (2 or 3 days I believe). I can't remember my exact words, but I do know that I was oozing self doubt and neediness when I asked her out. It was something like "Er, um, I know you're busy with school and all, with finals coming up, but if you could find some time I would really like to take you out for dinner and drinks!?.

HOW FOECKING WEAK AND PITIFUL DID THAT SOUND????

I blew my shot with one of the handfull of girls that I have really been attracted to in my life with one lousy, weak assed, pu$$y, nice guy chump sentence!

If I would have grabbed the bull by the horns, taken the initiative to ask "whats your #", and been confident and forward when I spoke to her, I honestly believe things would have turned out differently.

Let this be a lesson to anyone who thinks they may be rude or coming on too strong by leading your prospect to your desired outcome.

 

[SoSuave.com]

bump

 

[MsThang]

Why do some guys ask for phone numbers when they have no intention of calling?

 

[ACTION]

Originally posted by MsThang:
Why do some guys ask for phone numbers when they have no intention of calling?

Personally, I don't know of any guys who do this. And if there are guys who do this, it's dumb shyt and I have no explanation for it.

 

[BGMan]

Yes, I have had a 100% success rate with "Say, what's your phone number?" -- seven out of seven so far this year.

BGMan

P.S. To answer some women's gripes about men asking for #'s and not calling, I admit that I have done it.

In MY case, the reason is that I thought that she would be someone I MIGHT want to ask out sometime (it's always best to have a few women to choose from!). However, occasionally I find out something about her which tells me that it wouldn't work (for instance, is one of the biggest flirts in the school), or maybe I find someone more attractive. I'm personally extra choosy because I'm thinking about someone I could conceivably spend the rest of my life with; I don't think it's bad to be picky!

A second reason is that some guys will do it just to practice and build up confidence. Then you have the wimp reason -- not enough balls to call.

 

[bashful]

same problem happens with me bro.

I asked for this cute girls number at my doctors office and she said, "oh i thought youd never ask, i was waitin to hear that"

I called her 2 days later, she wasnt home, she never called me back, she was "never home" or so her roomate says. " oh she just stepped out" She just stepped out the last 3 times i called.

I got the point after that, but im still confused.

Girls are stupid.

 

[maranathaman]

They do it because they don't want to say the honest thing: "No Thanx, I'm not interested" because they figure it's somehow easier to blow us off later on rather than risk having to explain why they don't wanna go out with you. I once took a Japanese culture class. And I was told that in Japan, it's considered rude to tell someone "NO", so if you ask them a question, and the answer IS actually "NO", instead of just saying that, they'll postpone the issue, or give a vague answer etc. Just like women!
So now, whenever I call, and they don't call back, or they say their busy etc. I take that as a "NO".
~Andy



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"Before you sign a new act, find out if they are wack!"