Why do so many people say dating is easier for men at 28-40?

[bigdave17]

This thread is hilarious, another recycle I've been reading for 1.5 years from OP, lol.

When you have solid game, it's like shooting fish in a barrel. Case in point:

Out last night with maybe 12-15 people. Almost all are 35-45+. We were having dinner in honor of one of our friends who recently and unexpectedly passed away. Here comes the waitress. I mean a SOLID 9/10. Chatted her up, gave her the usual C&F routine and asked her some simple questions. A lot of IOIs being thrown back. She's probably 24-26. I'm 45+. Made no difference to her. Kept chatting her up and making her laugh each time she came over. End of the night, I pay my bill. She asks if I want anything else. I say yes, your number, because we're going hiking and then out for margs...if you can keep up with me. She laughs and looks me up and down. She says she'll try to keep up. She comes back with her number written down, old school style, no typing in phone BS. I say thanks, say goodbye to people and get the hell out of there. Pretty much perfect execution of the DJ principles I've learned and PRACTICED over the years.

So, you can read all you want and p*iss and moan and whine and b*itch on SS, BUT if you don't take advice, swallow bitter red pills, get the he*ll out of your own way (@bigdave17) and PRACTICE, you'll never be DJ.

It takes work, people.

Ciao,

Dash

One aspect people here are ignoring is i have significantly lower standards than most of you guys

I only want about a 6 face (but with a nice body). I'm literally ok with a woman less attractive than myself and I'm still struggling

 

[zekko]

I only want about a 6 face (but with a nice body)

Yeah, a 6 that never ages.

Anyway, Guru already told you that a 6 with an 8 body is an 8. People emphasize their good points.

 

[bigdave17]

Yeah, a 6 that never ages.

Anyway, Guru already told you that a 6 with an 8 body is an 8. People emphasize their good points.

I showed Guru a few of the girls I liked on dating sites and he rated them between 4-6s

you guys need to stop this narrative that I want a 10/10

and practically every other race outside of real light skin white women age well. Olive skinned white women, asians, blacks, hispanics, middle eastern, indian, fiipino, etc... all age well. I'm just not that interested in light skin white women

 

[Mike32ct]

I showed Guru a few of the girls I liked on dating sites and he rated them between 4-6s

you guys need to stop this narrative that I want a 10/10

and practically every other race outside of real light skin white women age well. Olive skinned white women, asians, blacks, hispanics, middle eastern, indian, fiipino, etc... all age well. I'm just not that interested in light skin white women

But even with a “6” face, these fitness types you like with full azz’s will easily consider themselves low 8s. That’s the point.

We’re not talking about plane janes who don’t exercise. These women put a lot of work into their appearance and in their minds will be thinking they are at LEAST a super high 7, but most likely an 8.

So irrespective of her actual (honestly appraised) looks rating, she will hold out for HER Chadlite type at a minimum.

 

[ChillDude6767]

Yeah, a 6 that never ages.

Anyway, Guru already told you that a 6 with an 8 body is an 8. People emphasize their good points.

These numbers mean nothing because it's all opinion.

 

[bigdave17]

But even with a “6” face, these fitness types you like with full azz’s will easily consider themselves low 8s. That’s the point.

We’re not talking about plane janes who don’t exercise. These women put a lot of work into their appearance and in their minds will be thinking they are at LEAST a super high 7, but most likely an 8.

So irrespective of her actual (honestly appraised) looks rating, she will hold out for HER Chadlite type at a minimum.

I saw one of our gym bunnies (who works out) yesterday at a bar with a dude who is a legit 3/10


I'm talking terrible skin, acne, pitted and very bald with ugly beard

 

[Mike32ct]

I saw one of our gym bunnies (who works out) yesterday at a bar with a dude who is a legit 3/10

I'm talking terrible skin, acne, pitted and very bald with ugly beard

I believe you. I don't know what his "angle" or "wildcard" is.

 

[bigdave17]

I believe you. I don't know what his "angle" or "wildcard" is.

supposedly he was dating this cute personal trainer before - another broad who is exactly my type (thick, dark hair, dark skin, big booty)


I'm guessing he met them through social circle. Trying to randomly approach girls like that at a bar or a gym is nearly impossible even when you're a 7/10 guy yourself. Imagine trying to approach them being a 3/10 with a nasty ass beard and ugly pitted acne destroyed skin.

 

[bigdave17]

Are you saying you're the 3/10 with the bad beard and skin?

huh? no I've posted pics of myself, everybody here agrees I'm somewhere around a 6 to 7.5. Guru rated me as a 7.5/10


I have 2 knocks against myself - I'm Armenian so I have some ethnic features to my face (although I look very European compared to most other Armenian man) and I've lost a good amount of hair. I did shave my head in 2016 though and I posted a pic of myself on a dating forum and multiple women said I looked better with a shaved head

 

[bigdave17]

Then what are you bytching about?

how are 2s and 3s pulling 6 to 7s with a hot body when i'm a 7.5 and if I message 6-7s like that on dating sites or cold approach in real life, I would get laughed at instantly?

 

[bigdave17]

Would, or do? Are you actually DOING?

I tried online dating and got absolutely nothing out of it

I only cold approach occasionally and results are absolutely terrible

 

[bigdave17]

I'm not going to wait for your response. Here's the scoop. When I'm not getting results, I know it's usually for a lack of effort. Sometimes I get busy with other things and that's fine. Other times I've gotten lazy. We all go through slumps, but I know if I've stepped up to the plate over and over again and struck out, I'm still coming home with a grin on my face because at least I tried and learned something. But the bottom line is it's up to me. I own it. When I have success I toast myself and when I strike out I pat myself on the back and/or figure out where I went wrong and correct it. One thing I don't do is worry about the success of others.

Contrary to popular culture, it's not a zero sum game. There is pu$$y to go around, just like there is money to go around. Some guys do very very well and good for them. Some guys were born on third. Others scrapped hard for everything. I worry about me and what I'm doing with the gifts God gave me. Am I maximizing them for a life well lived? When I'm 95 and half-dead will I have a grin on my face or the face of a man who's lived a life of quiet desperation and regret?

I was going to roast you for having 3,000 posts in 18 months, but that's a cheap laugh and maybe it's not fair. After all, I'm on here too. Only you know for sure if you're out there living. Not everything has to boil down to a lay or having a girlfriend. And anyway you need to adjust your attitude first. I gotta go to bed (it's 2 a.m. here) but that's my $.02.

I have a horrible, very defeatist attitude in regards to dating

I don't know how to convince myself that dating and women are not impossible

 

[Mike32ct]

I have a horrible, very defeatist attitude in regards to dating

I don't know how to convince myself that dating and women are not impossible

Actually, that's an extremely common incel view. (I'm not judging you. We're just talking here.)

Then what happens is that some very well intentioned people try to get a guy to go from the "Women/dating is impossible" frame to a "Women/dating is easy (abundance blah blah)" frame. But it's way TOO drastic a shift that the guy isn't ready for. It's a complete (pi radian) shift.

How about just a SLIGHT shift in your view for now? Go from "Women/dating is impossible" to "Women/dating is going to be a brutally difficult mother-F-er, but I can do it."

Go from "impossible" to "extremely difficult but possible."

 

[corrector]

Or women is "impossible" in the terms that I'm prepared to invest my time, energy, money and emotional capital on. I don't think BigDave wants a Pyrrhic victory. He just wants to be able to go online, with his 9+ Armenia photo, and be able to pick up dateable women without feeling that he is at a disadvantage because he doesn't have unique European features. Otherwise he's expending more in this equation than he plans to without getting a hit to his ego and undermining what he feels he has built up for himself in terms of his value proposition.

So, yes it is impossible for BigDave otherwise, he will feel ripped off.

 

[Mike32ct]

Or women is "impossible" in the terms that I'm prepared to invest my time, energy, money and emotional capital on. I don't think BigDave wants a Pyrrhic victory. He just wants to be able to go online, with his 9+ Armenia photo, and be able to pick up dateable women without feeling that he is at a disadvantage because he doesn't have unique European features. Otherwise he's expending more in this equation than he plans to without getting a hit to his ego and undermining what he feels he has built up for himself in terms of his value proposition.

So, yes it is impossible for BigDave otherwise, he will feel ripped off.

Fair enough.

As an underdog, I love Pyrrhic victories.

But you are correct that that is probably not Dave's cup of tea.

 

[zekko]

I have a horrible, very defeatist attitude in regards to dating

I don't know how to convince myself that dating and women are not impossible

I'm not sure that game/seduction forums are the best place to hang around, then.

Guys into this stuff tend to have very bad opinions about women, and perpetuate the idea that they only want the very elite, and that any small mistake will cause you to fail. It can also lead to overthinking and over analysis, not to mention comparing yourself to other guys who appear or claim to have a better outcome than you.

 

[Totallykile]

99% of the challenge of dating is actually getting opportunities. Yea you have to be likeable/personable on a date but that's obvious common sense and let's be honest, that's not difficult at all. Once a woman likes you, you just have to be natural/comfortable/genuine and go through the normal process and you'll be fine.

If I got 3 or 4 dates with decent women, I would have a girlfriend in a week. I just get zero easy opportunities with anybody dateable

last week, this ugly fat indian girl tried like 6 times to approach me at a bar. That's the only kind of opportunities I get.

I'm no don Juan yet but if you really want to increase your chances and have a good reason to talk with woman from a 6+ spectrum get a part time job at a bar or gym or other highly social areas where the women you are looking for are. I know you dont need this job for money but it would put you in a position where they would almsot have to talk with you. See how that goes for you. . . who knows.

 

[corrector]

I'm not sure that game/seduction forums are the best place to hang around, then.

Guys into this stuff tend to have very bad opinions about women, and perpetuate the idea that they only want the very elite, and that any small mistake will cause you to fail. It can also lead to overthinking and over analysis, not to mention comparing yourself to other guys who appear or claim to have a better outcome than you.

This forum doesn't do that. Any online dating site would lead to that jaded experience when you see nobody takes you on there, and those that do have issues that would make them unsuitable, but then you feel pressured to take them because your ego just got bombed by all the ignores, no replies, etc.... or go without.

 

[zekko]

This forum doesn't do that.

This forum doesn't intend to do that, but that can be the effect for some. You talked about OLD, that's a perfect example.

Posters tell stories about how online women have far more options than guys, how they only go for the best looking 20%, how women get so much attention through social media. They talk about how these women are garbage quality, have been riding the carousel for years, and are not suitable for LTRs. You can see how some guys might find this discouraging.

 

[escaleraroyal]

It's different for everyone. FUKIN PERIOD, END OF DISCUSSION.