Why do Men Date Older Women?

[Georgepithyou]

What is the mentality in dating a woman 5+ years older than you? Most women want a man who is older than them, logically speaking a man would want a woman to be the same age or younger than him.

So why would a guy go out of his way to date an older woman? I've even seen guys claim that they "only date older women".

Banging a milf/cougar seems exciting but actually o dating one is a different story.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

Basically money or a pre-existing relationship.

 

[Black Widow Void]

The keyword you mentioned here is "dating" and since I typically date women my age or older, I'll chime in.

There are more women in my age group (not all, but more) that haven't been tainted by current social attitudes. This means that they are more likely to be more traditional. Most of them realize that they are past their prime and as a result, they are some-what more humble.

The above doesn't really matter if she's just a "take home" ... but if you're going to spend time with a gal, I prefer those that provide fewer headaches.

 

[metalwater]

No mystery in this one. SMV calculation.

Guy dates the best woman he can, which means it is a woman he thinks he can date and the woman also thinks so.

If his looks, money, status, game is bad the SMV match might be an older more used woman.

The ones that have us scratching our heads is when the man in his own mind has a lower SMV than others see and accepts or chases an older woman (lower SMV). She sees it, but he does not. Match made in heaven...

The same guy presented with a younger woman that also teats him as desirable will quickly win over the older one. Doesn't happen because his mind doesn't believe it and the younger women see the old one and his value goes down. At the same time, he is very attractive to the older woman because he believes it.

Guys tell all sorts of reasons why to rationalize, just like women tell reasons to rationalize.

 

[Robert28]

I don’t.

 

[SW15]

I can identify with doing it from 18-24, but not as 25+. Once you are 25, you are older than enough women to be attractive to a woman at least slightly younger than you are.

 

[oc16]

What is the mentality in dating a woman 5+ years older than you? Most women want a man who is older than them, logically speaking a man would want a woman to be the same age or younger than him.

So why would a guy go out of his way to date an older woman? I've even seen guys claim that they "only date older women".

Banging a milf/cougar seems exciting but actually o dating one is a different story.

I agree. I am 44, but in shape and can pass for mid to late 30s. Unless the woman is very attractive, I have no zero interest in dating (sex is another story) a woman 40+.

When you think you're getting IOI's from women 10, 15 and sometimes 20 years younger, you'd want to shoot yourself if you're stuck with a woman your own age (or very close).

We men are attracted to smooth youthful skin like flies on ****.

I also scratch my head when I see a good looking dude or relatively good looking dude with a woman who is way overweight. My only conclusion is that they have been dating/married awhile and she was alot hotter at some point.

 

[Georgepithyou]

I agree. I am 44, but in shape and can pass for mid to late 30s. Unless the woman is very attractive, I have no zero interest in dating (sex is another story) a woman 40+.

When you think you're getting IOI's from women 10, 15 and sometimes 20 years younger, you'd want to shoot yourself if you're stuck with a woman your own age (or very close).

We men are attracted to smooth youthful skin like flies on ****.

I also scratch my head when I see a good looking dude or relatively good looking dude with a woman who is way overweight. My only conclusion is that they have been dating/married awhile and she was alot hotter at some point.

100% agree, when i was 23 I went on a date with a woman double my age. She was very attractive for her age but it felt like i was out with my mother.

I can identify with doing it from 18-24, but not as 25+. Once you are 25, you are older than enough women to be attractive to a woman at least slightly younger than you are.

18-24 should be when you date women from your college social circle.

There are more women in my age group (not all, but more) that haven't been tainted by current social attitudes. This means that they are more likely to be more traditional. Most of them realize that they are past their prime and as a result, they are some-what more humble.

The above doesn't really matter if she's just a "take home" ... but if you're going to spend time with a gal, I prefer those that provide fewer headaches

I do agree that they are less of a headache, whenever i talk to an older woman they are direct and straight to the point. Way less games and sh*t tests.

Guy dates the best woman he can, which means it is a woman he thinks he can date and the woman also thinks so.

If his looks, money, status, game is bad the SMV match might be an older more used woman.

This is definitely true, it's why a lot of us start with fat girls and work our way up.

 

[Duke26]

Rollo says guys will date what they have had luck with in the past. If it’s older women then they tend to go for older women.
I have found this to be mostly true for myself too

 

[SW15]

I can identify with doing it from 18-24, but not as 25+. Once you are 25, you are older than enough women to be attractive to a woman at least slightly younger than you are.

18-24 should be when you date women from your college social circle.

1. Not everyone goes to college after high school or when they are 18-22. In fact, too many United States residents go to college and get BA/BS degrees. We need fewer BA/BS degrees and more trade school certifications.

2. If a man goes to college after high school, he'll finish college around 22. From 22-24, he won't be on campus anymore and then he'll be fighting it out with the general populace. Often, the general, non-university affiliated populace of singles is older than the 22-24 year old male.

3. When older women want younger guys, they often want the 18-24s. Depending on the age of the woman, sometimes 25-29 years olds can be a part of it. Being a 25-30 year old guy should be getting women slightly younger or even 5-7 years younger if you're 27-30.

4. If you want to best position yourself for an LTR, being an 18-24 year old guy and locking down a 18-24 year old woman for an extended period can be a justifiable option.

 

[2Rocky]

Listen, I bedded down women 10 years younger than me, but when it came to relationship material, it happened that older women rose to the top... YMMV but I noticed these things:

As an older man in my 40's it is about women who have a similar timeline and experiences. My kids are older....Women 10 years younger than me still have kids in elementary school. If they don't have kids, most want to have a family soon. I decided I was done with young kids.
I'm in upper mgmt. I don't really want to date a woman in a position that I would supervise if we worked together. I want an intellectual equal who can match my drive and passion.

Age differences are less meaningful the older you get. the "1/2 your age plus 7" rule for the lower end of a dating couple bears that out.

If a woman is as concerned with her looks at 50 as she is at 30 she will be a hot 50 year old. Example: Demi Moore. If a woman is in shape at 40 she will likely keep off the extra weight the next few years. How many hot 20 year olds ballooned up to obese in the next 10 years from my experience? Most of them...FWIW "thicc" is not my thing.

I wanted someone who was equivalent to me in sports and athleticism. When I turned 40 I was running times with the top 50 year old female ultramarathoners in my area. I came to appreciate the toughness of these older women.

I lead a rugged outdoor life. Most of these 20 year old "10's" guys fawn over are too worried about breaking a nail or missing a hair appt. doing stuff outside and getting sweaty and dirty. SO that eliminates a big portion of the "top end" women for me....

Older women have frequently "outgrown" their previous spouses and partners. Their energy is a lot more positive and realistic than that of younger girls. They are no-bullsh1t about sex. they aren't afraid to tell you they want it.

Older women have the time and money to do things. They might have gotten the cabin at the lake in the divorce, they might have an inheritance from their parents. They usually are not shy about contributing financially to a good time.

Folks joke about Cougar-Cub...it ain't that way with the right one...it's more like Lion and Lioness

 

[BMX]

So why would a guy go out of his way to date an older woman? I've even seen guys claim that they "only date older women".

Banging a milf/cougar seems exciting but actually o dating one is a different story.

I can't speak to your first point. But to the latter, it was a lot more enjoyable to bang them in my early 20's, now in my early 30's all I prefer out of them is to bang me and stop talking. They are terrible and clearly missed the last train out of town in most cases. I don't fall for their: "wE aRe ThE sAmE aGe, wE sHoUlD dAte" BS rhetoric. Our lives and lifestyles are usually radically different. They aren't any fun outside of bed. It's like going to a job interview held in a cage where they beat the f out of you, act condescending and berate you but also expect you to knock them up unnaturally fast and settle down. It's not a job you really wanted to begin with.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

In my 50's so dating older - unless utterly exceptional in every way, think athlete, former gymnasts, ballerinas, rock climbers, crazy limber yogis, etc. - is out of the question for me. Therefore I mostly date 35-50 heavier 30 something side. The trouble with those is that they want someone to raise their pre-existing spawn with or a provider type.

Most of the younger men I associate with that date older chicks say it's about ease, access to resources, self-awareness on the cougar side, and how grateful they are to be with a younger man.

Many of the exceptional 50-somethings I've associated with will not date men more than 5 years younger than themselves.

Thought this might be a useful addition to the thread.

The keyword you mentioned here is "dating" and since I typically date women my age or older, I'll chime in.

There are more women in my age group (not all, but more) that haven't been tainted by current social attitudes. This means that they are more likely to be more traditional. Most of them realize that they are past their prime and as a result, they are some-what more humble.

The above doesn't really matter if she's just a "take home" ... but if you're going to spend time with a gal, I prefer those that provide fewer headaches.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi George,
This is a perennial on the site,every year or so and every year I trot out the same response...Your own Ben Franklin as well as being a great Statesman and Polymath,was a Svexual Connoisseur,in his Seventies he was still doing the rounds of the Paris Salons,Fathered a menagerie of illigitimate Kids...His advice to a young Man seeking a little female comfort, was to consider the advantages of Older Women a quote from his letter..."On aging,In every Animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of improvement..He also agreed with Pearce that "They are so grateful to be with a younger Man".

 

[The Duke]

I've dated girls 10 yrs older and 18yrs younger than me. It's always been harder for me to mentally connect with those 10 plus years younger.

As far as those older than me, they were always very attractive and all looked 10yrs younger than they really were. Looks wise they could compete with the hottest girls 10yrs younger than them. The older women weren't as needy and more secure with themselves.

I'd never settle down long term with a girl that was 10yrs older, nor would I do it with a girl 10+ years younger.

I'd take a hot 40yr old over a mediocre 25yr old any day. If her body isn't top notch, I'm not interested. Quite frankly I see more over weight 20 yrs olds than I've ever seen.

 

[bat soup]

What is the mentality in dating a woman 5+ years older than you? Most women want a man who is older than them, logically speaking a man would want a woman to be the same age or younger than him.

So why would a guy go out of his way to date an older woman? I've even seen guys claim that they "only date older women".

Banging a milf/cougar seems exciting but actually o dating one is a different story.

When I was 18, I banged a 28 year old Spanish student that I was teaching English. I wanted to make her my girlfriend but she just wanted to have fun. At the time, I actually found it quite exciting to bang a girl this much older than me. It was like a novelty and I think for her the novelty of banging a much younger guy was also exciting. She told me I was too young, but I could see that it also excited her. The inappropriateness of it just made it even better. The first time I kissed her she told me she had a boyfriend. Then she called me up one day and we met up, kissed again and ended up having sex.

Later, I also tended to date girls that were a couple of years than me but still in their 20s. For me, regardless of my own age the age range of the girls I'm interested in has never gone up. I've never really been interested in women over 30. But then I see other guys dating women in their 40s, 50s etc, which I don't think I'd ever want to do.

When you are young, older women can be useful if you want "easy access". They don't take younger guys seriously in terms of relationship potential, but they do enjoy getting fukked by them. So if you want to just have sex, it will be easier to do this with women slightly older than you because they won't take you seriously and try to get you into a relationship. On the other hand, younger women often see older men as potential providers.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

What is the mentality in dating a woman 5+ years older than you? Most women want a man who is older than them, logically speaking a man would want a woman to be the same age or younger than him.

So why would a guy go out of his way to date an older woman? I've even seen guys claim that they "only date older women".

Banging a milf/cougar seems exciting but actually o dating one is a different story.

Low t.

Hockey player PK Suban is dating or engaged to old hag. Classic example of blue pill and no game despite the acclaimed status. There's a significant amount of social media marketing and advertising for brain washing dumb asses to marry up has been vjj.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I've dated girls 10 yrs older and 18yrs younger than me. It's always been harder for me to mentally connect with those 10 plus years younger.

As far as those older than me, they were always very attractive and all looked 10yrs younger than they really were. Looks wise they could compete with the hottest girls 10yrs younger than them. The older women weren't as needy and more secure with themselves.

I'd never settle down long term with a girl that was 10yrs older, nor would I do it with a girl 10+ years younger.

I'd take a hot 40yr old over a mediocre 25yr old any day. If her body isn't top notch, I'm not interested. Quite frankly I see more over weight 20 yrs olds than I've ever seen.

The only connection in want is my D in P or in her mouth. 40 is gross. Do you knock the dust off that puss?

 

[SW15]

When you are young, older women can be useful if you want "easy access". They don't take younger guys seriously in terms of relationship potential, but they do enjoy getting fukked by them. So if you want to just have sex, it will be easier to do this with women slightly older than you because they won't take you seriously and try to get you into a relationship. On the other hand, younger women often see older men as potential providers.

All accurate.

When women are ~32-33+, they often see men who are within 5 years of their own age as meal tickets/providers as well. So a 35 year old woman will make a 36 year old man jump through hoops to get her vagina but not require as much of a 21 year old because she has no expectations beyond getting fuccked.

When both younger and older women see the same man as a potential provider, it's better to chase younger if you can attract younger. Some men don't offer enough to attract 10+ years younger.