Ive been with my gf for over a year now just about. Sometimes she seems like she has high self esteem and at other times and has low self esteem. It is true she tries to sabotage the relationship sometimes by doing and saying stupid sh*t. Its like she is so scared sometimes like when it comes to her friends and me she will always take her friends side because obvisiouly she is worried that something will happen and she needs to keep her friends tight with her. No problem with her being with her friends but its obvious she does that cause shes scared of the relationship sometimes. It is hell living with a girl like that up and down like a freakin merry go round. I honestly want to pick up and leave sometimes (I live with her) but I dont know how i guess cause of her my emotions go up and down for her.
Why do low confidence girls sabotage their chances?
- Thread starter Jariel
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comic_relief
Master Don Juan
It's hard as hell to accomplish but you can raise her self-esteem up. To me this is fun because I like to raise people's self-esteem and I am at a point in my life right now where I want to be but I still improve daily. If I wasn't wanting to go to college to be a teacher it would be something like an author or something to do self-help stuff.
I managed to save a girl from herself by using the same techniques from this site that saved me. Believe me it is possible and she will show it. I had a lot of fun with raising and now its a lot of fun. She really is a lot of fun.
Tell me, when you came to this site were you low self-esteem or at the level that you are at?
comic_relief
DoubleJuan
Don Juan
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i agree with you....as a man you allways have to enter a relationship in the position of power.......and you cant do that when she is "better" and you have problems.
but for women it's the other way round...they naturally want someone "better" to fvck with...you can see the truth easily when girls are drunken.
short answer: they don't, you do
long answer: LSE girls are the best ****-testers of all women, they DO want to kiss you they are just terrified of TRYING ANYTHING because they'll get their heartbroken (GEE DOES THAT SOUND LIKE A THREE LETTER ACRONYM WE ALL KNOW)
If you want one and she keeps knockin you back but you know she likes you, just keep plowing, she's **** testing you, take control and don't fall for her LJBF bullsheet.
long answer: LSE girls are the best ****-testers of all women, they DO want to kiss you they are just terrified of TRYING ANYTHING because they'll get their heartbroken (GEE DOES THAT SOUND LIKE A THREE LETTER ACRONYM WE ALL KNOW)
If you want one and she keeps knockin you back but you know she likes you, just keep plowing, she's **** testing you, take control and don't fall for her LJBF bullsheet.
Peace and Quiet
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
gimmeyofonenumba
Master Don Juan
Im glad i found this topic. 1 thing i realized is that as i meet more and more women, you can start categorizing them easier.
I've been talking to a an ex-co-worker at work and i asked for her # one night, and she didnt want to give it. There is something about this girl, she is really bright and happy when she sees me, but the rest of the time and around everyone else she is just kinda gloomy. I couldnt figure out why she kept avoiding my advances,at one point i was 110% sure she liked me, now im not so sure anymore...I havent seen her in a few weeks, but i think i'll try picking things back up. I like REc's advice.
Another thing, with LSE girls, do you guys notice that when you talk to them you have like 100% control of the conversation? you are always introducing conversation, asking her questions,etc. A matter of fact, I sometimes feel like i even have control over them...kind like you can cut through their silly games and obstacles and just go do stuff.
I've been talking to a an ex-co-worker at work and i asked for her # one night, and she didnt want to give it. There is something about this girl, she is really bright and happy when she sees me, but the rest of the time and around everyone else she is just kinda gloomy. I couldnt figure out why she kept avoiding my advances,at one point i was 110% sure she liked me, now im not so sure anymore...I havent seen her in a few weeks, but i think i'll try picking things back up. I like REc's advice.
Another thing, with LSE girls, do you guys notice that when you talk to them you have like 100% control of the conversation? you are always introducing conversation, asking her questions,etc. A matter of fact, I sometimes feel like i even have control over them...kind like you can cut through their silly games and obstacles and just go do stuff.
gimmeyofonenumba
Master Don Juan
elaborate?, im not too sure what you mean by this. Also, like you said they will also play alot of headgames, like through out a line fishing for compliments, try to tell you how women dont like this and that. I think they try to make women in general or just themselves sound more sophisticated and complicated than she really appears to be. If you dont play along with her games she has no idea how to conduct herself.
ShizamDaMan
Master Don Juan
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Man, reading this thread makes me realize that this girl I've been a bit interested in on my staff has low self confidence. The description is to a T.
I chalked up her flaky behavior to going to an all girls school throughout high school, but it's more likely that she has no confidence in herself. Everytime we hang out due to our job we always end up having a good time, but the few times I've asked her to hang out together she's given some excuse, but then come back with "Just keep trying, one of these times I'll be available." Odd behavior if I do say so.
I've been laying off coming to her to interact, but I think now that I know what's up I should also step up on trying to get something together. I'm certain that once we get to hang out 1:1 good things will happen.
I chalked up her flaky behavior to going to an all girls school throughout high school, but it's more likely that she has no confidence in herself. Everytime we hang out due to our job we always end up having a good time, but the few times I've asked her to hang out together she's given some excuse, but then come back with "Just keep trying, one of these times I'll be available." Odd behavior if I do say so.
I've been laying off coming to her to interact, but I think now that I know what's up I should also step up on trying to get something together. I'm certain that once we get to hang out 1:1 good things will happen.
Blue Phoenix
Master Don Juan
It seems that some of you are mixing up low self-steem girls with low interest girls!
If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
Well as soon as you stop showing interest and attention, and back off they realise what they've lost and start doing the chasing or expressing interest. It gives you more control, but whether you'll ever get it together is a different matter.
gimmeyofonenumba
Master Don Juan
ya man, i noticed that they will try "accidently bumping into you" its like they are afraid to show they have alot of interest in you. Theese girls seem to require the most effort, but i think it can be worth it in the long run.
I'm having the same problem with some girl.Her friends tell me that she likes me but when I ask her to hang out,she comes
up with some excuse.So that makes me wonder if she likes me or not.Should I forget about her?
up with some excuse.So that makes me wonder if she likes me or not.Should I forget about her?
I'll just write another example here to see if it helps anyone relate...
My friend is a natural player. He is very confident and hits on women all the time. He gets some, he fails with others, but he's always in the game.
A few years ago I introduced him to one of my female friends, they had amazing chemistry between them and they both admitted to me they were falling in love. He asked her out and she rejected him. I asked her why and she told me she didn't have the confidence, was scared of getting hurt and in her own words "why would he stick around? He can do a lot better than me". She was also intimidated by his popularity and player attitude.
To his credit, he didn't stick around and wait for her. He started dating other girls (on the rebound cos his feelings for this girl never changed), she would get hurt and jealous, but kept rejecting him every time he gave her another chance. This went on for over a year and everyone could see he was seriously into her except her.
It worked both ways though. The more she resisted, the more he wanted her.
Anyway, he turned cold on her and gave up trying. Then she continued pestering him, tried to start arguments to get his attention back.
But this did have a happy ending... He never asked her out again. Instead he waited until they were alone, started flirting and getting cuddly. He pushed it a little further, and it led to them having sex. After that, she STILL refused to go out with him, so he went cold on her yet again, until finally she contacted him and said she was willing to take a chance.
They've been together for 6months now and all is well. She's very much in love with him, and he's in control of their relationship.
The thing is, does anyone really want to persist with a girl for nearly 2 years on the offchance she might change her mind?
My friend is a natural player. He is very confident and hits on women all the time. He gets some, he fails with others, but he's always in the game.
A few years ago I introduced him to one of my female friends, they had amazing chemistry between them and they both admitted to me they were falling in love. He asked her out and she rejected him. I asked her why and she told me she didn't have the confidence, was scared of getting hurt and in her own words "why would he stick around? He can do a lot better than me". She was also intimidated by his popularity and player attitude.
To his credit, he didn't stick around and wait for her. He started dating other girls (on the rebound cos his feelings for this girl never changed), she would get hurt and jealous, but kept rejecting him every time he gave her another chance. This went on for over a year and everyone could see he was seriously into her except her.
It worked both ways though. The more she resisted, the more he wanted her.
Anyway, he turned cold on her and gave up trying. Then she continued pestering him, tried to start arguments to get his attention back.
But this did have a happy ending... He never asked her out again. Instead he waited until they were alone, started flirting and getting cuddly. He pushed it a little further, and it led to them having sex. After that, she STILL refused to go out with him, so he went cold on her yet again, until finally she contacted him and said she was willing to take a chance.
They've been together for 6months now and all is well. She's very much in love with him, and he's in control of their relationship.
The thing is, does anyone really want to persist with a girl for nearly 2 years on the offchance she might change her mind?
I went to pick the chick up from school like last week(she brang her friend so I didnt really do too much). I put my arm around her and she put her arm around me too. I think you have to do what your friend did. Just go for it.
Don Juanabbe
Master Don Juan
Don't try to save LSE chicks.
My girlfriend in my early 20s (when I was young, AFC and stupid) was really lacking in that dept. to say the least:
- I tried to get her back to school, but she always felt she wasn't good enough. She saw the work other students did, and never felt she was good enough. She dropped out. We argued, I tried to convince her to go back - she broke my nose.
Other things that happened in the relationship were things ranging from constant sh*t tests to full out psychotic behaviour at the worst:
- she was really jealous of my sister; she used to ask me questions like, if I had a choice to save her or my sister from a life threatening situation, who would I pick? I said that wasn't a fair question, we argued, she popped me one.
- she used to start arguments at parties in front of my friends; if people weren't paying her enough attention she often ended up starting arguments. One ended up in me getting hoofed in the nuts, and her throwing a bottle at my best friend's head, and punching him in the face.
- I was playing jazz on the piano at a family get together and she slammed the piano lid on my hands out of jealousy and then stormed out, leaving my entire family with their mouths hanging open in shock.
- One time we were at a bar with my sister, and some slimeball starts hitting on my sis. She rebuffed him but he wouldn't let up. I stepped in and put an end to it, not violently, but needless to say, the guy backed the f*ck off. My then girlfriend got all jealous of the protection I exhibited for my sister, and in her messed up mind equated that to me loving my sister more than her. She started a big argument with my sister and me, she flung her handbag at me.
She left and went back to my apartment. My sister and I followed. She had locked us both out and wouldn't let us in. My sister tried to talk sense to her through the door, and my girlfriend started shrieking at the top of her lungs, calling my sis and me every name in the books. This was so loud, even the neighbours started coming out into the hallway. Someone called the police and she ended up getting a warning.
This all happened in under the span of a year and a few months.
I was young, stupid and AFC, but needless to say, I dumped the hor and learned a very valuable lesson. I unfortunately wasted over a year on this broad and sacrificed a good chunk of my best years (21-22 years old).
This is not only the hallmark of a LSE girl, but also the flaws that modern feminism has churned up in creating this spoiled, whacked out generation of females.
A LOT more young girls behave like this than you realise, and it doesn't matter if you are AFC or DJ or whatever, you simply cannot have a normal relationship with them. The only plus about being a DJ in this situation is that you likely wouldn't get involved with such a f*cked up hoe in the first place, much less spend over a year of your life with the c*nt.
You young 'uns better learn to recognise the signs of a f*cked up b*tch like this and run for your life if you come across one, that's all I can say. That's over a year of my life that I coulda been DJing, pissed down the toilet on a f*cking skank-b*tch-c*nt.
My girlfriend in my early 20s (when I was young, AFC and stupid) was really lacking in that dept. to say the least:
- I tried to get her back to school, but she always felt she wasn't good enough. She saw the work other students did, and never felt she was good enough. She dropped out. We argued, I tried to convince her to go back - she broke my nose.
Other things that happened in the relationship were things ranging from constant sh*t tests to full out psychotic behaviour at the worst:
- she was really jealous of my sister; she used to ask me questions like, if I had a choice to save her or my sister from a life threatening situation, who would I pick? I said that wasn't a fair question, we argued, she popped me one.
- she used to start arguments at parties in front of my friends; if people weren't paying her enough attention she often ended up starting arguments. One ended up in me getting hoofed in the nuts, and her throwing a bottle at my best friend's head, and punching him in the face.
- I was playing jazz on the piano at a family get together and she slammed the piano lid on my hands out of jealousy and then stormed out, leaving my entire family with their mouths hanging open in shock.
- One time we were at a bar with my sister, and some slimeball starts hitting on my sis. She rebuffed him but he wouldn't let up. I stepped in and put an end to it, not violently, but needless to say, the guy backed the f*ck off. My then girlfriend got all jealous of the protection I exhibited for my sister, and in her messed up mind equated that to me loving my sister more than her. She started a big argument with my sister and me, she flung her handbag at me.
She left and went back to my apartment. My sister and I followed. She had locked us both out and wouldn't let us in. My sister tried to talk sense to her through the door, and my girlfriend started shrieking at the top of her lungs, calling my sis and me every name in the books. This was so loud, even the neighbours started coming out into the hallway. Someone called the police and she ended up getting a warning.
This all happened in under the span of a year and a few months.
I was young, stupid and AFC, but needless to say, I dumped the hor and learned a very valuable lesson. I unfortunately wasted over a year on this broad and sacrificed a good chunk of my best years (21-22 years old).
This is not only the hallmark of a LSE girl, but also the flaws that modern feminism has churned up in creating this spoiled, whacked out generation of females.
A LOT more young girls behave like this than you realise, and it doesn't matter if you are AFC or DJ or whatever, you simply cannot have a normal relationship with them. The only plus about being a DJ in this situation is that you likely wouldn't get involved with such a f*cked up hoe in the first place, much less spend over a year of your life with the c*nt.
You young 'uns better learn to recognise the signs of a f*cked up b*tch like this and run for your life if you come across one, that's all I can say. That's over a year of my life that I coulda been DJing, pissed down the toilet on a f*cking skank-b*tch-c*nt.
comic_relief
Master Don Juan
Don Juanabbe
That wasn't a usual LSE chick. That was a psychotic b!tch. If my girlfriend or any girl that I was seeing or just knew did that sh!t to me. I would send her flying out of my life quicker then anything I ever saw.
No one deserved to date a b!tch like that.
comic_relief
P.S. why was she jealous of your sister?
That wasn't a usual LSE chick. That was a psychotic b!tch. If my girlfriend or any girl that I was seeing or just knew did that sh!t to me. I would send her flying out of my life quicker then anything I ever saw.
No one deserved to date a b!tch like that.
comic_relief
P.S. why was she jealous of your sister?
Interesting thread.
This kind of thing happens in relationships too in a way. Sometimes women get insecure and start arguments because they need your attention and reassurance.
In the case of a lot of posts here, it sounds like the women give guys a hard time or reject them in the hope the guy will try harder to pursue them and give them more reassurance.
Women love attention. It's their nature. But as men we need to find the balance between too much attention and reassurance and not enough. Either extreme will blow it.
This kind of thing happens in relationships too in a way. Sometimes women get insecure and start arguments because they need your attention and reassurance.
In the case of a lot of posts here, it sounds like the women give guys a hard time or reject them in the hope the guy will try harder to pursue them and give them more reassurance.
Women love attention. It's their nature. But as men we need to find the balance between too much attention and reassurance and not enough. Either extreme will blow it.
Don't feed the attention monster. When i give reassurance it's only indirectly because when a girl is like "do you love me" and "do you think i'm pretty" or other nonsense like that and you're like "oh yes baby you are the best blah blah blah" all that does is encourage more attention begging because it worked last time.
Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.