why do girls like losers?

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
Just because a guy is indifferent and not tied to the outcome of a relationship (IDGAF) doesn't make him "a loser."

LOSER: No goals (#1), no $, no property, no drive, no motivation, likely drug user, little or no skills and/or education, no job or low paying job. Notice ALL these things are AFFECTABLE.

Some (not all) women date these guys because the woman's self esteem is very low and it makes her feel wanted and superior dating a man with so many issues. These are also the women who keep going back to an abusive relationship, time and time again, only to have the man abuse her time and time again. Nothing could be more sad.
It's not always an abusive situation. Well the "abuse" might just be "financial". But the need to feel "superior" than the guy ( smh ). Being around smart people makes a secure smart person even smarter, doesn't make them feel inferior.

Related to this are the women who are "fixers"; they seek out "broken" men and try to fix them. Ironically, once the man does get his act together, often the woman leaves him because he's no longer a challenge to her and now may even be superior--and her fragile little ego can't handle that or she just gets bored.

A man who is outcome indifferent when it comes to dating and relationships has the cornerstone of the DJ mentality.
We all know women fall for the "challenge" of "fixing" man. This is a game they play, and the guys know they are going to be cheating and lieing and running their game. Female thinks "well, if he was just more loyal and didn't cheat, he would be perfect". So she challenges herself to "change" him, someone that never in a million years was going to be changed, because he knows she's challenged by it, plus it's who he is.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,063
Reaction score
8,903
TLDR: You don't have to know exactly HOW gravity works. But don't be surprised if stuff falls.
I pick C.

I don't know how gravity works, but I've seen several science videos that explained that the reason things fall is because time passes faster the further away from a mass (like the earth). So somehow the faster time pushes the object down into the slower passing time, and that's why objects fall. I don't pretend to quite understand that or even if I buy it, but that's what they said.
 

Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
8,105
Reaction score
4,716
Location
Eastern Time Zone where it's always really late
I pick C.

I don't know how gravity works, but I've seen several science videos that explained that the reason things fall is because time passes faster the further away from a mass (like the earth). So somehow the faster time pushes the object down into the slower passing time, and that's why objects fall. I don't pretend to quite understand that or even if I buy it, but that's what they said.
I’ve heard all the theories about the chick having low self esteem, wanting to “fix” a guy, etc. But after lots of hamstering, I’m ok saying that I don’t know the true reason.

Even looks/BP doesn’t fully explain the attraction because not all of these guys are good looking.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
I’ve heard all the theories about the chick having low self esteem, wanting to “fix” a guy, etc. But after lots of hamstering, I’m ok saying that I don’t know the true reason.

Even looks/BP doesn’t fully explain the attraction because not all of these guys are good looking.
His abundance and cheating makes a huge ego in attraction, and that attracts them. They don't know why ( in the case of not good looking guy ), but they know they are attracted.
 

Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2007
Messages
8,105
Reaction score
4,716
Location
Eastern Time Zone where it's always really late
I personally hadn't yet found "one" theory that fully sold/convinced me.

Theory: "She needs a guy to fix."
Problem: "The nerdy nice guy who is clingy and doesn't dress well needs to be fixed, but she's not interested in taking him on as a project."

Theory: "She's just going by his looks."
Problem: "We all know that some bad boys are NOT good looking."

Theory: "It's biology bro. He's alpha."
Problem: "I thought alphas were rich, high-achieving men. There is a low-achieving alpha too?"

Theory: "He DGAF, and that attracts women."
Problem: "A 'cel guy who has given up on women DGAF either. But it doesn't make women chase him."

Theory: "They have an inferiority complex and cannot be with someone better than them."

Hmm. Maybe the last one has some merit. But doesn't she still "brag" about him or "talk him up" to her friends regardless of his shortcomings?
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
I personally hadn't yet found "one" theory that fully sold/convinced me.

Theory: "She needs a guy to fix."
Problem: "The nerdy nice guy who is clingy and doesn't dress well needs to be fixed, but she's not interested in taking him on as a project."
Naw... The "fix" guy is a Tyrone or Chad, if he would just stop cheating and lieing, that he'd be a good partner. They are seduced by the "challenge" of trying to change him. He won't change because that's who he is.

Theory: "She's just going by his looks."
Problem: "We all know that some bad boys are NOT good looking."

Theory: "It's biology bro. He's alpha."
Problem: "I thought alphas were rich, high-achieving men. There is a low-achieving alpha too?"

Theory: "He DGAF, and that attracts women."
Problem: "A 'cel guy who has given up on women DGAF either. But it doesn't make women chase him."

Theory: "They have an inferiority complex and cannot be with someone better than them."

Hmm. Maybe the last one has some merit. But doesn't she still "brag" about him or "talk him up" to her friends regardless of his shortcomings?
 

death_wish. .

Banned
Joined
Jul 27, 2020
Messages
328
Reaction score
239
Age
31
Location
California
I personally hadn't yet found "one" theory that fully sold/convinced me.

Theory: "She needs a guy to fix."
Problem: "The nerdy nice guy who is clingy and doesn't dress well needs to be fixed, but she's not interested in taking him on as a project."

Theory: "She's just going by his looks."
Problem: "We all know that some bad boys are NOT good looking."

Theory: "It's biology bro. He's alpha."
Problem: "I thought alphas were rich, high-achieving men. There is a low-achieving alpha too?"


Theory: "He DGAF, and that attracts women."
Problem: "A 'cel guy who has given up on women DGAF either. But it doesn't make women chase him."

Theory: "They have an inferiority complex and cannot be with someone better than them."

Hmm. Maybe the last one has some merit. But doesn't she still "brag" about him or "talk him up" to her friends regardless of his shortcomings?
women respond to masculinity as the highest most important trait , looks money and status will wear off or either you will just be cheated on and still keep her . but then whats the point?

there are many '' LOW ACHEIVING ALPHAS'' . example: the guy who has no job but smokes weed all day BUT: he is sexually attractive , strong , and dominant and dont take no ****. some women only respond to that
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
Yep. That’s what I was thinking on the fix part.
I know so many females caught in that trap. Like a bear or a wild animal with their paw caught in a trap, can't let go. They keep trying to make it a desireable situation.

They explained that they "like a challenge", I mean damn, you want to waste dozens and dozens of hours per week on these type of "challenges" when you could be bettering yourself instead? What a fvcking waste of time.

That same woman can't ask Chad or Tyrone for any manly type help outside of sexxing. So they lean on their male friends and orbiters for things that their "man" should do.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,063
Reaction score
8,903
I’ve heard all the theories about the chick having low self esteem, wanting to “fix” a guy, etc.
I picked the low self esteem explanation, but there are definitely also the caretaker girls who want to fix guys, or at least take care of them. True, some incels don't get picked, but it comes down to who they form an emotional attachment with. The other guy wormed his way in there first. These guys aren't necessarily cheating Chads either, although that exists. Some women are drawn to broken men.

"Loser" is not synonymous with "good looking". In fact, if the guy is good looking he's probably not a total loser, at least he has his looks he can leverage off of. "Loser" also does not necessarily mean "alpha" or "IDGAF".

I thought you were responding to the gravity theory I was talking about lol.
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
2,674
Reaction score
2,792
Age
34
I haven't read through all of the posts on this thread, but here is my input.

Some women seem to go for men who appear to be "fixer uppers". Maybe they get some sort of satisfaction from helping such a man improve? Maybe these women like to be in a position of power in a relationship, and in order to do so intentionally date down knowing that these men probably won't leave or cheat. Maybe men like this are all women have access to in the first place?

There could be a vast number of complex reasons for this and while it is an interesting idea I don't think it's really all that complicated.

Most women generally get into relationships with men that mirror them in some manner or fashion.

I know of a guy in my area that is a couple years older than me, around 32ish, and is for real one of the biggest douchebags I have ever met. He associates with these real estate scam artists, I'm talking like those bogus seminars and such, is friends with nightlife promoters out here, one in particular I know sells coke. Besides that the dude just comes across as a poser, fake, etc.

Anyway, he has a live in girlfriend, who is not only very attractive but college educated and has a decent job at a hospital, came from an upper middle class background, etc. This guy actively cheats on her and yet despite all of this and his characteristics she sticks with him. Most normal and well adjusted women would leave but the reason she stays with him is BECAUSE on a deeper level she is just as messed up as he is.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
I haven't read through all of the posts on this thread, but here is my input.

Some women seem to go for men who appear to be "fixer uppers". Maybe they get some sort of satisfaction from helping such a man improve? Maybe these women like to be in a position of power in a relationship, and in order to do so intentionally date down knowing that these men probably won't leave or cheat. Maybe men like this are all women have access to in the first place?

There could be a vast number of complex reasons for this and while it is an interesting idea I don't think it's really all that complicated.

Most women generally get into relationships with men that mirror them in some manner or fashion.

I know of a guy in my area that is a couple years older than me, around 32ish, and is for real one of the biggest douchebags I have ever met. He associates with these real estate scam artists, I'm talking like those bogus seminars and such, is friends with nightlife promoters out here, one in particular I know sells coke. Besides that the dude just comes across as a poser, fake, etc.

Anyway, he has a live in girlfriend, who is not only very attractive but college educated and has a decent job at a hospital, came from an upper middle class background, etc. This guy actively cheats on her and yet despite all of this and his characteristics she sticks with him. Most normal and well adjusted women would leave but the reason she stays with him is BECAUSE on a deeper level she is just as messed up as he is.
Very normal. When you break down the situations they usually aren't that "clean".
 

Glassguy

Moderator
Joined
Apr 25, 2016
Messages
4,703
Reaction score
8,652
Age
47
Let me give you my take-

1.) Women with any value do not like LOSERS. They like a CHALLENGE. They want to feel as though they have GAINED something valuable and worked for it.
2.) Most "Good guys" are pushovers. They have no self respect, live in a Disney fairytale looking for "the one" and they will not make decision that benefit themselves first and foremost and never tell a woman "no".

Be the successful guy that has higher value that is also a challenge. That is where it is at.

To do this, you must be working on bettering yourself always, have other women in your orbit, an abundance mindset and major self respect /not put up with any disrespect......have the ability to always be able to walk away.

Do not be the guy that texts them all the time. Do not be the guy that gets jealous. Do not be the guy that initiates any type of relationship or "labeling". Do not be the guy that has a lot of free time. Get hobbies, purpose(s) and goals. Work on them.

High value AND being a challenge = success with women.
 

fastlife

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2015
Messages
1,132
Reaction score
2,164
1.) "Successful" guys are usually that way out of insecurity (gotta impress my parents!) and sexual neediness (gotta drive a Beamer to get laid!). The ones who flaunt that success or base their internal value on it, even more so. It's very rare that they're acting out their own purpose; more often, they're just doing what's socially safe. Guys who get laid all the time are less likely to put in as much effort into trying to be "successful"--they don't need to.
2.) Being "successful" requires a significant time investment. That is time that those men aren't out partying and meeting girls. "Successful" men also tend to work in more rigid, stifled environments where they have to censor what they say and brown nose to a lot of people around them.
3.) "Successful" men get slotted into the provider box. If a girl thinks you're "boyfriend material" she won't put out as quickly, which usually means she doesn't put out at all. With a loser, she has NOTHING to lose lol and once a girl sleeps with a guy a handful of times, she's far more likely to end up in a relationship with him.
4.) "Successful" guys are often really boring. Nothing exciting ever happens to them. They work in boring environments with boring people and they tend to be isolated from the more edgy, exciting side of life.

Sometimes codependency plays a role, but it has more to do with the factors above. Even (especially) well off, emotionally healthy girls like slumming it from time to time. It gives them the chance to let their hair down, live a little, not worry about living up to society's standards for her. That's not to say successful guys can't get laid (plenty do) or that you shouldn't aspire towards success (there's a lot of cool experiences that money can buy), BUT you're better off acting like you're poor or being really evasive about what you do like you might secretly be a drug dealer or something.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
1.) "Successful" guys are usually that way out of insecurity (gotta impress my parents!) and sexual neediness (gotta drive a Beamer to get laid!). The ones who flaunt that success or base their internal value on it, even more so. It's very rare that they're acting out their own purpose; more often, they're just doing what's socially safe. Guys who get laid all the time are less likely to put in as much effort into trying to be "successful"--they don't need to.
BMW purchase might not have been to get laid, it might have been because you had the means and it's what you wanted to do. Many successful people have been former atheletes, collegiate and even some professionals are in the environments. So why would a guy whose never accomplished sh1t except wasting womens time and dragging them down to a non-productive level have anything over a former competitive athelete who transitioned to a big boy money maker?

2.) Being "successful" requires a significant time investment. That is time that those men aren't out partying and meeting girls. "Successful" men also tend to work in more rigid, stifled environments where they have to censor what they say and brown nose to a lot of people around them.[/quote]

If you have your own company your not brown nosing, except maybe to your big customers.

3.) "Successful" men get slotted into the provider box. If a girl thinks you're "boyfriend material" she won't put out as quickly, which usually means she doesn't put out at all. With a loser, she has NOTHING to lose lol and once a girl sleeps with a guy a handful of times, she's far more likely to end up in a relationship with him.
Very true!!! Even happens to pro atheletes and many rappers are literally "tricks" to their wives and gf's and I hate to say it like that. Look @ all the divorces today, all the big names, big masculine men being blown out...

4.) "Successful" guys are often really boring. Nothing exciting ever happens to them. They work in boring environments with boring people and they tend to be isolated from the more edgy, exciting side of life.
Some of the "successful" are adventurous spirits and part of fight clubs, and live an adventurous life outside of work.

Sometimes codependency plays a role, but it has more to do with the factors above. Even (especially) well off, emotionally healthy girls like slumming it from time to time. It gives them the chance to let their hair down, live a little, not worry about living up to society's standards for her. That's not to say successful guys can't get laid (plenty do) or that you shouldn't aspire towards success (there's a lot of cool experiences that money can buy), BUT you're better off acting like you're poor or being really evasive about what you do like you might secretly be a drug dealer or something.
You are very right that very successful, even if they are physical studs get slotted into a provider box. So many big name masculine men have been put into this position. How the masculine looks at the world and how the female side looks at the world are two different viewpoints.
 

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

fastlife

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2015
Messages
1,132
Reaction score
2,164
BMW purchase might not have been to get laid, it might have been because you had the means and it's what you wanted to do. Many successful people have been former atheletes, collegiate and even some professionals are in the environments. So why would a guy whose never accomplished sh1t except wasting womens time and dragging them down to a non-productive level have anything over a former competitive athelete who transitioned to a big boy money maker?
Made liberal use of "most," "often," and "usually." There's nothing wrong with being successful or enjoying the fruits of your labor. And there are ways to disqualify yourself from being a provider like obviously being a player or letting girls know you're a free spirit or telling them you have a girlfriend, etc., etc. But obvious wealth will still work against you most of the time for anything no strings attached.

I framed things the way I did because OP is ego invested in society's frame about what makes a successful man and what makes a loser, so he needs a little bit of a mind fvck to shake him loose.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,885
Reaction score
12,121
Location
DFW, TX
Made liberal use of "most," "often," and "usually." There's nothing wrong with being successful or enjoying the fruits of your labor. And there are ways to disqualify yourself from being a provider like obviously being a player or letting girls know you're a free spirit or telling them you have a girlfriend, etc., etc. But obvious wealth will still work against you most of the time for anything no strings attached.

I framed things the way I did because OP is ego invested in society's frame about what makes a successful man and what makes a loser, so he needs a little bit of a mind fvck to shake him loose.
yeah... It can be quite a "mind fvck" like you said. Some of the "losers" have their lives optimized for "fun", and this is exactly what babes use them for... The more focused and determined man has alot less time for "fun", as a result of his life choices.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 24, 2017
Messages
6,096
Reaction score
4,852
Age
34
I have been googling this but not getting any convincing answers

Why do girls tend to like losers?
a) they don't like losers, you are wrong
b) because losers are more carefree and fun. winners are like "I am so educated and I have this bmw" while losers don't care.
c) because they have an inferiority complex and cannot be with someone better than them
d) evolution bro. read up on it.
e) none of the above.
More than two decades of her life is indoctrinated by feminism, girl power, and daddy government amplifier being a culture who offers ZERO accountability on women.

I subscribe to the aaron Clarey enjoy the decline and operations evil. If women want to ski down cawk mountain, ride the CC, crater smv and run to the state for free money, I am going to get Lulz as the crash comes. I am not interested in saving women nor do I care.


Op, you are not doing it right. Wrong Q. A better Q is how do you win the game not save women. It's female nature to live in a solipsm and destroy ****, get fat, implode their marriage and **** up the kids.

Good riddance.
 
Top