Why do girls flake?

[NSUballer]

I asked this girl out to lunch on wednesday. She agreed to meet me with no apprehension at all. She actually said the time to meet. Then last night she messaged me on facebook saying she couldnt make it. She had already told me that she had nothing else to do. How long does a normal lunch last? 30-40 minutes tops? The question is why? Why would she flake at the last minute for no other reason than she had to go somewhere? Helpful responses only

 

[Play the Game]

They're not that into you and they want to avoid being put on the spot where they have to reject you. They don't feel like going out with you either because you're too eager, try too hard, or you're just plain boring.

I actually flaked on a girl last week that asked me out. Basically i told her yes, because i felt bad rejecting her. Then i realized i didn't really want to go out with her. As the day of the date approached, I got this feeling in my gut like i'm going to throw up if i have to hear her tell me how hot i am one more time or if she touches me. So i cancelled last minute. ( I really wasn't attracted to her, and she just wouldn't take a hint.)

Best thing to do is to move on.

 

[NSUballer]

But I know that isnt the case with this girl. She was eager to meet up with me. I actually asked her to meet me thursday. And she told me that she had class at 130 and a dentist appointment at 12. She actually agreed to meet me on thursday but I told her friday would be better for the both of us. She then emphatically said "no i dont have anything to do friday lets meet at 12" i said okay see you then and walked away. The whole conversation was about a minute.

I can tell when a girl is into me or not. Its just something im good at. And this girl is not a normal girl. Not normal meaning shes very attractive, virgin, goes to college in the same town she grew up in, still lives with her parents, etc. Ive talked to her a few times before and never asked her out. the question is why do girls flake when they really are interested?

 

[HolyG]

It happens to all of us.


I'm trying to figure out how to get it NOT to happen.


It's real irritating too..I attract them pretty good and then they just flake out.

 

[Play the Game]

Girls who are interested and attracted to you will not flake on you, flaking is a sign of low Interest Level. Girls will be nice and lead guys on even though they have no intention of going further. You're obviously not that great at judging interest level. Remember look at her actions not words. Words are cheap.

 

[Interceptor]

Maybe she got a pimple?

Maybe she's playing a power move?

Maybe she's being "nice" and declining the meeting by flaking?

Maybe she's been abducted by Aliens? (don't laugh! It happens!)


Dude, women flake ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

get used to it.

It happens to EVERY GUY.

You hear that?

EVERY SINGLE GUY HAS GOTTEN FLAKED ON.


Next time you see her, don't give her too much attention.

We, as men, believe that a woman shoudl be straightforward like many men are.
What if it were your guy friend?

How many timeshave you not called a guy that you were supposed to "do something " with?

Did he cry?
Did you cry?
nah, man. We're guys we do that to each other from time to time.


You EGo was hurt. You felt disrespected. YOu felt lied to your face.


Are you going to give this female your time, attention, and interest?

No.
You're smart.


Next time you see her, don't treat her any better than anyone else.
She just proved to you, she's not too good at communication.
basically, heres the deal.
Yous ee girl. You are attracvted to girl. You state you want to meet with girl to find out what she's like, to see if you're interested in her.

Girl flakes.

Guy is Not too interested anymore.

Guy is still alive, living life.

 

[NSUballer]

But Im not one to just give up that easily. I know theres different ways to go about this.

1 Pretend like it never happened and make up an excuse of why it was a bad time for me also. And keep trying. Keywords here are persistence and perserverence.

2 Knowing what she did, call her out on it and see how she responds. If she really wants to go out then she will. If not then she wont.

Anyone with experience in this is greatly appreciated.

 

[NSUballer]

Oh and 3 Act like I dont care and neg her, possibly talk to her friends in front of her instead of talking to her. I live in a very small college town and I know I will see her tonite when I go out.

 

[Play the Game]

Son, your ego is writing checks your reputation will not be able to cash. She's not interested. Period. MOVE ON. There are other women.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Yo NSUBaller,


Here is a more indepth answer to your question about the subject of Flaking:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=1206649#post1206649

It's taken from The Mature Man State of the Union Address, but I think you will still be able to get A LOT out of it.



March on!

 

[Interceptor]

But Im not one to just give up that easily

LOL!
Who said about "giving up"?

Game on, soldier!!!!!!!!!!



To Infinity..and BEYOND!

GO get'em , tiger!

 

[NSUballer]

Victory that was the best article i think ive ever read. My net is huge at the moment and I know it and she knows it. I actually broke up with a girl two weeks ago and she actually told me a few days later that I made her feel like she wasnt good enough for me. And that was funny becuase I didnt think she was either. So if she is interested and flakes then what?

 

[NSUballer]

LOL!
Who said about "giving up"?

Oh, and your "experience" "comment" is choice!
OUCH! You are so vile, young man! What a tongue!



:crackup:

You're welcome.

I dont understand what youre telling me, I wasnt saying that you werent experienced. Im just no looking for and 17,18,19 yr old kid to post about something they dont really understand.

 

[Interceptor]

Ohhh..ok, cool. man.



BTW, wanted to give props to VU.
Defintiely a good influence on this board.

Very helpful and insightful man.

Salute!

 

[NSUballer]

The thing is I really believe I can get this girl to go out with me at some point. I know shes interested by the way she acts around me. And all I have to do is get her alone with me somewhere anywhere, and then I can take care of the rest. Ive got the game. And I know it. the only problem is i think she knows it too. And theres other factors that could affect this also.

 

[NSUballer]

And she did send me a message at 1030 last might so she didnt just blow me off.

 

[Interceptor]

You may need some more Social Proof.

IS there anyway you can put yourself in her line of sight so she can see you interact with other men and especially, other women?

 

[Interceptor]

And she did send me a message at 1030 last might so she didnt just blow me off.

Ahhh......see? you didn't stat that!

This is good. You see how you have to fill out the details so we can help you better?

More social proof.
More attraction building.

Be care ful with the rapport and comfort.

I think you need more of the above, than the latter.

You need to calibrate.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

So if she is interested and flakes then what?

Yo NSUBaller,


Re-read that part of the thread that I posted. And this time, pay close attention to the parts about "core compatibility" and chicks who tend to gravitate BACK to what they're already familiar with.

Also, know that women flake a lot of times because they are attention whhores who are only seeking to use us as just ONE of their many options. Never assume any woman is really THAT into you until she has demonstrated a consistency of good behavior towards you for at least MONTHS or so. And the younger the woman is, unfortunately, the MORE her behavior is initially untrustworthy-------because her core personality is usually in flux BECAUSE of her youth.

Also, recognize that women like this tend to SEEM to become more attracted to you AFTER you reject them simply because they are SO addicted to male attention that when you do reject THEM for a change:

REJECTION doubles THEIR interest level in you.

And finally, BECAUSE a lot of women love to keep many men on the backburner as "options", they develop a tendency to manipulate men with their behavior.

Read THIS thread for more information on this tactic:

ACTRESSES in the THEATER OF WAR!
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=130806


And yo, INTERCEPTOR...peace to you, my brother.:rockon: I don't usually hang out on the general discussion board very often, so I'm glad that great SPIRITUAL INTELLIGENCE OFFICERS like yourself come over and drop knowledge for the younger "troops" from time to time as well...:yes:

 

[NSUballer]

oh thats NOT the problem. Last week a friend of mine that plays for the New York Jets came to town. We had a big party and it was crazy. Im not conceited but I know that im a pretty popular person(im a football player). Im very good at talking to women and I do it often, usually only attractive women. My social proof is very high. I think she might be a little apprehensive because alot of my friends smoke weed and I know shes not into that.

Also, one of her best friends is goin out with one of my good friends. And the girl I broke up with 2 weeks ago went to the same high school as her.

And I know this girl is not very experienced with guys. Shes a virgin and has only had 1 bf for like 3 years.