Why Did My Girlfriend Say This?

[soulforge]

terrible advice, just gonna start a fight. they are in a committed relationship,

OP, just tell her not to be insecure, and that the girls were a coworker and a cousin and some random FB update. Tell her that you're shocked she'd take you for a cheater and that she'd think that low of you. Tell her instead of making terrible assumptions about your character, she should have communicated with you like an adult and you would have happily explained. She'll drop it.

btw, "bluealpha," once you go around calling yourself an alpha, you automatically just lost in life.

I decided to give her an explanation and just reassured her, that there is nothing to worry about.. its a commited relationship, so no point in playing games here..

That bieng said.. if she carries on making me feel guilty for something i have not done.. and creates a big drama out of this.. i will tell her straight, i do not like her making assumptions about be like this!!!

 

[soulforge]

Yes it is male- female specifoc. Why is a male feminist like you on this board anyway?

Btw, my books are about mens issues at the workplace and about travel, not relationships. See in life people who trash other people's works having never even looked at the synopsis much less read them are usually people that haven't produced a single thing in their lives.

I'm not posturing - only responding to the initial jab that came from you. But of course I will hit back, so pretend we're all a girl youre interested in and qualify yourself by telling us what you've done to make you the consumate expert.

Sorry dude, your advice just did not sit well with me!

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

she then told me, that she does not mind me seeing other woman???

She is hypersenstive to guys cheating, as it happened before. People that think they are going to get hurt can oftentimes "beat the other person to the punch" by forcing the issue. Believe it or not, some girls would rather FORCE the issue of "you=cheating on her" than live with the fear. That's why she said that. What she WANTED you to do was to convince her you'd never do that. Which is why she didn't like your answer to be "cool" with seeing other people. You basically helped her realize her worst fears. She really DOESN'T want you to see others, but she's so worried she forces you into a position to PROVE that you won't.

And you didn't, that's why she's angry.

Now, in reality, those issues are HERS to deal with, and it's kind of sh!tty to put somebody into the position she put you in, but that's what it is.

Unfortunately, now you can't go back and say you "misunderstood" since a tests are designed to elicit your AUTOMATIC response, not a thought out response.

But you could just be sensitive to her insecurities. Lots of romantic movies are based on "misunderstandings" between people, that end up happily ever after, so you could play that angle.

Just understand you're dealing with a girl who's got a super sensitive "he's cheating on me" hair trigger.

 

[usernamedox11]

Yes it is male- female specifoc. Why is a male feminist like you on this board anyway?

Btw, my books are about mens issues at the workplace and about travel, not relationships. See in life people who trash other people's works having never even looked at the synopsis much less read them are usually people that haven't produced a single thing in their lives.

I'm not posturing - only responding to the initial jab that came from you. But of course I will hit back, so pretend we're all a girl youre interested in and qualify yourself by telling us what you've done to make you the consumate expert.

because you give crap advice on women. stick to travel.

 

[ArcBound]

Been seeing a woman for 6 months, things have been going well.. we was planning to meet each others family over Christmas..

When she is at my house i very rarly use my phone, because i find it rude to be texting people all the time in her company

Today she confronted me, and asked me if i had something to hide.. because i don't use my phone around her much.. i told her straight its rude to be texting all the time, so i get my business out of the way, so i,m not texting all the time.

She told me, her ex husband used to avoid using her phone around her.. and he cheated on her!

GF: "Soulforge I am insecure pleasure reassure me you aren't fvcking other b!tches"

I told her she has nothing to worry about...

Soulforge: "I'm not"

BUT she then told me, that she does not mind me seeing other woman???

GF: "Haha just kidding I'm not insecure, go fvck all the bitches you want "

This kinda annoyed me.. because i like this girl.. and if she really cared for me, then why would she not be bothered about me seeing other woman?

Why meet each others family? I told her fair enough, we might aswell be casual or fuk buddies if your not bothered about me seeing other woman.

Soulforge: "Alright sure"

She didn't like my response.. why would she say this?

GF: (FVCK FVCK FVCK He's not supposed to yes)

I feel quite angry at her.

Bold is what the underlying conversation is about. She's an insecure girl trying to bluff and play it off like she doesn't care if you go bang other b!tches but she actually does care. Edit cause taiyuu otoko already said what I wanted to say

 

[BlueAlpha1]

because you give crap advice on women. stick to travel.

Right, communication is key and there are no differences with the genders. Do you apologize to your women for being born a rapist? So considering I think you give crap advice on women & I've asked you to show us anything noteworthy you've produced but you can't, stick to nothing.

 

[fastlife]

Proceed with caution OP.

Been through that. Wouldn't go through it again. It starts out small--"How would you feel about having a threesome?" Deflect--"Oh, good. I'd probably be a little annoyed watching you f*** another girl."

Then she's upset about a FB message she saw from before you were dating when she went through your phone. But she's been hurt before so you try to reassure her.

Then you're being shady when you don't respond to her text message in 15 minutes when it usually only takes you 5. It doesn't stop there.

Then she's accusing you of sleeping with female coworkers, sleeping with male friends, managers, some random girl from your class who wrote feedback on one of your papers, sleeping with her mother. But she's only like that because she cares so much and she knows how awesome you are and how many options you have.

And all of this happens so slowly that it seems normal and you don't realize something was bad wrong until she's run off with another dude--probably the guy who 'cheated on her' and 'treated her like dirt.' But then you realize that for her you're now the guy who was cheating on her and treating her like dirt.

A little insecurity in a woman's to be expected. But be very, very cautious.

 

[usernamedox11]

Right, communication is key and there are no differences with the genders. Do you apologize to your women for being born a rapist? So considering I think you give crap advice on women & I've asked you to show us anything noteworthy you've produced but you can't, stick to nothing.

i am big bad bluealalfala...agree & amplify everything is a test...agree & amplify is the best method...i read it in pua blog...hehe

 

[G_Govan]

I decided to give her an explanation and just reassured her, that there is nothing to worry about.. its a commited relationship, so no point in playing games here..

That bieng said.. if she carries on making me feel guilty for something i have not done.. and creates a big drama out of this.. i will tell her straight, i do not like her making assumptions about be like this!!!

Unfortunately, the games never end with women, no matter what kind of relationship you're in.

She's just using typical female manipulation. Some guys believe female jealousy games means they care.

I've seen women do this to "control" their men. They turn into lesser men who walk on eggshells because they're afraid of upsetting the queen.

If you haven't done anything to warrant this behavior you have nothing to explain. If she wants to live by her imaginations make it clear to her that she's free to do that, without you.

Its a very common tactic.

 

[soulforge]

Unfortunately, the games never end with women, no matter what kind of relationship you're in.

She's just using typical female manipulation. Some guys believe female jealousy games means they care.

I've seen women do this to "control" their men. They turn into lesser men who walk on eggshells because they're afraid of upsetting the queen.

If you haven't done anything to warrant this behavior you have nothing to explain. If she wants to live by her imaginations make it clear to her that she's free to do that, without you.

Its a very common tactic.

Great advice guys.. i made an exepction this one time to reassure her.. mainly because, one of the text messages from my female work friend said, that she misses me.. again this work colleague is purly a friend.. and not even in the slightest attractive to me...

This is bound to create suspicion in her.. if it was the other way around, i would probably feel the same way..

But from here on.. if she accuses me or creates any further drama because of her insecurities, i will have to tell her to change her behaviour or i will walk.. there is no way i am walking on egg shells for any woman ever again

 

[GetFit66]

I would have just looked at her with a blank stare. She sounds like she would've come to your arms after a few minutes.