Why Avoid LJBF?

[12AJ12]

So I've been contemplating writing this thread for the past few days. I decided to go through with it and see what everybody thinks.

I've heard it a hundred times. You've probably heard it a hundred times.
"Help, I'm in the friend zone. How do I get out?"

Statistically, it almost never works out.

So why not turn a liability into an asset?

I mean, if she wants to be your friend. She doesn't find you sexually attractive despite your escalation and teasing. I've been there a couple times. I had a girl invite me to sleep in her bed but didn't want to fool around. But she obviously likes me on one scale or another right? So she doesn't want to sleep with me, but she sure as hell will want to see me happy? So why not make her my wingwoman. Let her help me get laid.

I'm not saying you shouldn't always be trying to escalate with woman. Let them know your interested. But If it didn't work out it didn't work out right?

Woman know what other woman like to hear. Woman add social value to you. Woman aren't as intimidating to other woman (Good for ice breaking.) but they sure can make them jealous if they have to. Woman are perfect for disarming the mother hen. Woman are good at distracting the guy blockers. They can help you with your style.

I got the idea this summer. I thought it was working out with a nice HB8. She invited me to her party. offered to buy me liquor. I get an impression on what needs to be done. However, 5 minuets after I arrive she is introducing me to her new boyfriend. Oh... Sh*T!
So, in a fit of stubborn rage, I stole her cute friend right out of the hands of the guy who was flirting with her. We went to the back room. The man that was flirting with this girl, and the girls other friend walk in on us. We finished up. The girl passed out, and I walked back outside. Girl number 2, who walked in on me, was being hit on the previous male I refered to earlier on in the report. Within twenty minuets, she took me inside... and our guy friend managed to walk in on me AGAIN.

The next morning I walked up to the original HB8 that I thought I'd be enjoying the night with. And I told her the magical words that you should tell any girl that has LJBF'd you at one point or another.

"Listen. I've come to realize that you are a very close person to me and very attractive.

I'm also quite the looker.

I think it's time we took this relationship to the next level,

And I promote you to wingman."

It worked out well for me, she's my number one wing. So instead of fighting the lJBF frustration, why not make her a little jealous while simultaneously making a very good friend.

Maybe you don't think its that great of an idea. Let me know what you guys think.

 

[Scars]

So I've been contemplating writing this thread for the past few days. I decided to go through with it and see what everybody thinks.

I've heard it a hundred times. You've probably heard it a hundred times.
"Help, I'm in the friend zone. How do I get out?"

Statistically, it almost never works out.

So why not turn a liability into an asset?

I mean, if she wants to be your friend. She doesn't find you sexually attractive despite your escalation and teasing. I've been there a couple times. I had a girl invite me to sleep in her bed but didn't want to fool around. But she obviously likes me on one scale or another right? So she doesn't want to sleep with me, but she sure as hell will want to see me happy? So why not make her my wingwoman. Let her help me get laid.

I'm not saying you shouldn't always be trying to escalate with woman. Let them know your interested. But If it didn't work out it didn't work out right?

Woman know what other woman like to hear. Woman add social value to you. Woman aren't as intimidating to other woman (Good for ice breaking.) but they sure can make them jealous if they have to. Woman are perfect for disarming the mother hen. Woman are good at distracting the guy blockers. They can help you with your style.

I got the idea this summer. I thought it was working out with a nice HB8. She invited me to her party. offered to buy me liquor. I get an impression on what needs to be done. However, 5 minuets after I arrive she is introducing me to her new boyfriend. Oh... Sh*T!
So, in a fit of stubborn rage, I stole her cute friend right out of the hands of the guy who was flirting with her. We went to the back room. The man that was flirting with this girl, and the girls other friend walk in on us. We finished up. The girl passed out, and I walked back outside. Girl number 2, who walked in on me, was being hit on the previous male I refered to earlier on in the report. Within twenty minuets, she took me inside... and our guy friend managed to walk in on me AGAIN.

The next morning I walked up to the original HB8 that I thought I'd be enjoying the night with. And I told her the magical words that you should tell any girl that has LJBF'd you at one point or another.

"Listen. I've come to realize that you are a very close person to me and very attractive.

I'm also quite the looker.

I think it's time we took this relationship to the next level,

And I promote you to wingman."

It worked out well for me, she's my number one wing. So instead of fighting the lJBF frustration, why not make her a little jealous while simultaneously making a very good friend.

Maybe you don't think its that great of an idea. Let me know what you guys think.

The only problem with that is woman generally make horrible wings. Period. They don't think logically, they are emotionally driven. They do whatever feels right at the time. Have you ever really taken advice from a woman? It's generally bullsh!t. They talk out of their @$$. A girl can say one thing but really mean the exact opposite. Anyone with general knowledge of woman knows this.

What's to say that she actually does develop feelings for you? She's going to give you some bullsh!t advice and will purposely try and fvck it up for you. Once she sees you with other woman she's going to think about it. What do they see that I didn't at first?

She's going to give you advice based on HER emotional levels. What would make HER happy at the time.

Some guys believe they can help with style, right on. I like to dress myself thanks. It seems a bit beta knowing a woman picked out my wardrobe.

And no, she doesn't know what woman want to hear. She only knows what SHE wants to hear.

Not to mention having woman as "friends" in general is a bit pointless. But that is a whole 'nother discussion.

 

[cffrmw]

Here's the #1 reason: people on this board read waaay too much, and most of them have decided it's easier to play the numbers game than actually work on yourself and get what you want out of life. And here's the thing - getting out of "LJBF" isn't that hard either. I used to read this stuff a lot, and it wasn't the stupid rules or any of that crap that finally made it work for me. It was the posts that said to become the person you WANT to be, and don't worry about having a girlfriend, that will all fall into place. So, I basically spent a year without worrying about girls, I became friends with a lot of them, but mostly I was just becoming the person I wanted to be (minus the girlfriend) - I learned to play the guitar, started working out 5x/week, started my own business (which failed but I think was totally worth the experience), learned a foreign language (Russian, and I went there to live for over a year to really get it down). That was all a couple of years ago. I'm now learning Jiu-Jitsu, and about to get my motorcycle license. And guess what? When you meet a new girl and she just wants to be friends, most of the time it's because she likes someone else at the moment. Eventually they'll get over that person, and if you've made your life interesting, it's usually you that becomes the new crush. And if not, well, if she's cool I'd still rather have another friend than not.

 

[Jitterbug]

A girl that rejects you (esp with a LJBF) will never be your wing. Contrary to popular belief, she will not introduce you to her hot friends. And even if you get to meet them through her somehow, she will not have anything positive (as far as seduction goes) about you to sell to her friends. What is she gonna tell them? "Oh, Mike is a great guy! But I never dated him because I thought he's a bit of a loser {insert other negative sh!t here}. He's good for you tho, go for it!"

Compare that with how easy it generally is to screw your (ex-)girlfriend's chick friends.

 

[xdreamz]

i don't know about turning LJBF into a wing... seems like a smart idea. "hey since i can't get any how bout you offer some substitute ***** instead?" but u can turn LJBF into sex it's been done b4 .

 

[12AJ12]

The only problem with that is woman generally make horrible wings. Period. They don't think logically, they are emotionally driven. They do whatever feels right at the time. Have you ever really taken advice from a woman? It's generally bullsh!t. They talk out of their @$$. A girl can say one thing but really mean the exact opposite. Anyone with general knowledge of woman knows this.

What's to say that she actually does develop feelings for you? She's going to give you some bullsh!t advice and will purposely try and fvck it up for you. Once she sees you with other woman she's going to think about it. What do they see that I didn't at first?

She's going to give you advice based on HER emotional levels. What would make HER happy at the time.

Some guys believe they can help with style, right on. I like to dress myself thanks. It seems a bit beta knowing a woman picked out my wardrobe.

And no, she doesn't know what woman want to hear. She only knows what SHE wants to hear.

Not to mention having woman as "friends" in general is a bit pointless. But that is a whole 'nother discussion.

Of course the following is posted for the purpose of debate, not hostility.

As far as if she develops feelings for you, then you have solved your original problem. I see it as, either she helps you helps you pick out the tail. Or she you've just escalated from where your current relationship stood. As long as you share a more optomistic viewpoint about women being capable of being capable associates in dealing with other woman -- then it's a win win situation.

As far as style goes, I usually go with MY own opinon first, but there are still people that could still gain to benefit from the help. "style is about what your comfortable" can be misleading. There is definitely room for failure.

And I would also have to respectfully disagree with you on your stance on woman friends being pointless, I would find that lifestyle slightly revolting if I were forced to embrace it.

Finally, maybe your are correct and statistically, most woman can't really help hook you up or introduce you to their hot friends. My experiences would prove to be going against the grain. They have however worked out for me. Which is why I thought I'd share it. In the end, a good looking girl will still add social value. And if your only purpose to have them along would be to unknowingly distract the males in a set, she's still served a purpose.

 

[12AJ12]

Here's the #1 reason: people on this board read waaay too much, and most of them have decided it's easier to play the numbers game than actually work on yourself and get what you want out of life. And here's the thing - getting out of "LJBF" isn't that hard either. I used to read this stuff a lot, and it wasn't the stupid rules or any of that crap that finally made it work for me. It was the posts that said to become the person you WANT to be, and don't worry about having a girlfriend, that will all fall into place. So, I basically spent a year without worrying about girls, I became friends with a lot of them, but mostly I was just becoming the person I wanted to be (minus the girlfriend) - I learned to play the guitar, started working out 5x/week, started my own business (which failed but I think was totally worth the experience), learned a foreign language (Russian, and I went there to live for over a year to really get it down). That was all a couple of years ago. I'm now learning Jiu-Jitsu, and about to get my motorcycle license. And guess what? When you meet a new girl and she just wants to be friends, most of the time it's because she likes someone else at the moment. Eventually they'll get over that person, and if you've made your life interesting, it's usually you that becomes the new crush. And if not, well, if she's cool I'd still rather have another friend than not.

Congratulations on your accomplishments btw.

 

[Igetit!]

I've heard it a hundred times. You've probably heard it a hundred times.
"Help, I'm in the friend zone. How do I get out?"

Statistically, it almost never works out.

Yeah,this is true. I personally don't think there's a way out. I've heard things such as go away for 6 months to a year,then re-approach her as a different person,which can work....if she doesn't remember you when you return.



However,no one I know has ever pull it off.

I mean, if she wants to be your friend. She doesn't find you sexually attractive despite your escalation and teasing. I've been there a couple times. I had a girl invite me to sleep in her bed but didn't want to fool around. But she obviously likes me on one scale or another right? So she doesn't want to sleep with me, but she sure as hell will want to see me happy? So why not make her my wingwoman. Let her help me get laid.

I gotta agree with Jitterbug on this one.

LJBF generally happens with you spend an excessive amount of time around a woman while NOT SHOWING your interest. So if you're around her a lot,even though she's not attracted to you,she'll get used to you being around.



If you get meet someone else,that means all the time and attention she'd normally be getting from you will go to another woman.,and thus,she'll be jealous....EVEN THOUGH she herself has no romantic interest in you whatsoever.




So she's not going to willingly help you give the attention she's gotten accustom to getting to another woman,especially if she herself is single.

I'm not saying you shouldn't always be trying to escalate with woman. Let them know your interested. But If it didn't work out it didn't work out right?

I hear what you're saying,but if it didn't work,and this happens repeatedly,I'd focus more on WHY I keep falling into the friendzone instead of making her my wingwoman.



I say that because if you get friendzoned constantly and don't know why,having a wingwoman won't help.



Even if she can introduce you to other women,the second you get alone with them and it's one on one,the countdown to getting friendzoned again has begun.

Woman know what other woman like to hear. Woman add social value to you. Woman aren't as intimidating to other woman (Good for ice breaking.) but they sure can make them jealous if they have to. Woman are perfect for disarming the mother hen. Woman are good at distracting the guy blockers. They can help you with your style.

True,women know what women like. But whatever it was that caused your wingwoman to put you in the friendzone,if "that thing" is still there when you meet someone else,then whatever it was that turned the wingwoman off wil turn off the new prospect as well.


A woman can help you with your style,but NOT your innergame.


Only one person can do that,and it's YOU.

So instead of fighting the lJBF frustration, why not make her a little jealous while simultaneously making a very good friend.

The only thing I don't like about this is that (at least for me) having her around me would be a constant reminder of being rejected.



Because if I even bothered to approach her in the first place,then she must be attractive. Why would I want to constantly be around a hot,attractive woman who I can't have?


Add that to the fact that you know some other guy is probably seeing her.



Nope,having a hot,attractive woman who rejected me,who I'm clearly attracted to,be around me WHILE I'M TRYING TO FIND SOMEONE TO DATE?



Uhh...no. I think i'll pass on that one.



However,if anyone else thinks it's a good idea,then have at it.

 

[Jitterbug]

Finally, maybe your are correct and statistically, most woman can't really help hook you up or introduce you to their hot friends. My experiences would prove to be going against the grain. They have however worked out for me. Which is why I thought I'd share it.

How did it work out for you? Please be specific.

Being someone who almost exclusively runs social circle game, I actually tested this theory many times, that is, after I got LJBFed, I was friends with the hottie hoping that she would introduce me to her friends & help me hook up with them. Never worked. Not when I asked them to help me directly. Not even if I did the work myself and just used her to meet her friends socially.

If you're not good enough for her, you're not good enough for her friends.

There might be some exceptions, but some people do win the lottery... The time & energy spent on converting a LJBF into a useful wing are not worth it. You're better off going after other girls on your own.

In the end, a good looking girl will still add social value. And if your only purpose to have them along would be to unknowingly distract the males in a set, she's still served a purpose.

Not if she LJBFed you. Don't we all know a guy who has zillions of hot female friends but never gets laid? I know quite a few of them!

###

However, if you make friends with a hot girl who is in a happy relationship, she can be a very valuable wing / matchmaker. That goes way back to the old days, before this modern Game crap.

 

[evoken]

LJBF ?

what is it ?

Let's Just Be Friends aka Friends Zone aka BULLSH1T

 

[12AJ12]

However, if you make friends with a hot girl who is in a happy relationship, she can be a very valuable wing / matchmaker. That goes way back to the old days, before this modern Game crap.

I was including that in the category actually. Probably should have been more specific.

Would you still feel it was a hopeless cause if it was a girl someone had been friends with before and you then later on developed feelings for?

And I've tried this twice. Once with each girl I referred to earlier. The one that woke me up when I was on her couch after a party at her place and told me I could join her in bed... but than acted shocked when I tried putting a move on her. And the other one I referred to in the long story. One did offer to help me get with her best friend (but than changed her mind when she got in a fight with her. so ya, score one for jitterbug.) took me to a bar to met girls. Brought me to a hot-tub party for the same reason, and of course I slept with two of her friends. The other one will purposefully join a conversation with me, add social valuing adding comments and stories then leave. And I've convinced both girls to distract a guy at one point or another.

So those are my specifics that you asked for.