WHY are women attracted to confidence?

Dirtheart

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2004
Messages
953
Reaction score
1
Age
47
Location
UK
It has been said time and time again that women love confident men. Women have told me this to my face, so I assume it to be true. But what I want to know is WHY?

What's so appealing about confidence?

I know I have a lot going for me in many areas, but I'm a modest person and don't have anything to prove. Yet I've been told my modesty is unnattractive to women. I don't get it?! Do women like to feel inferior?
 

Slickster

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2003
Messages
2,533
Reaction score
213
Location
Canada
Are you really for real?

How would it make you feel if you were boarding an airplane and the pilot was all fidgety and nervous as hell?

How would you feel going to the hospital for surgery and the doctor comes in looking like a total putz who doesn't have a clue what he's doing?

You wouldn't feel safe would you?

Women like confident men because they feel safe around them.

The concept goes back to cave man days.
 

Dirtheart

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2004
Messages
953
Reaction score
1
Age
47
Location
UK
You're right. Next time I operate on my date, I'll have to remember that. hehe. ;)

But I know what you mean by that. But if that's all there was to it, wouldn't women just go for the toughest and roughest S.O.B they could find?
 

JohnJones

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2002
Messages
582
Reaction score
1
Location
PA
There is a difference between being cool and being modest -- too much modesty says you are a nice guy.

If you are not the type who wants or tries to be in the spotlight, your body language, demeanor and attitude should ultimately, without saying anything, give out a confident vibe from you that doesn't need to be spoken.
 

Dirtheart

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2004
Messages
953
Reaction score
1
Age
47
Location
UK
Thanks John. I do tend to fall into the nice guy category too often and maybe that has some part in it. I'm not shy or nervous, but I often play myself down so that I don't appear intimidating.

So I need to find a balance between modesty and arrogance, right?
 

InLawsHateMe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2002
Messages
1,165
Reaction score
0
Location
Columbus, Ohio USA
Confidence dude... everyone likes it.. your gf, your best friend's gf, your boss, your friends, your co-workers, they all do... not just the women.... being confident, and flexing some strengths is a good thing... naturally, there will be peeps who aren't used to this type of aura, so they become jealous, but f*ck em.... my gf, reminds me sometimes, or when she goes to describe me, calls me an ego maniac.... but if that's such a bad thing, why she still with me? ....because deep down inside, they know I'm for real. I'm not a good bullsh*tter.... just be yourself, and be honest to yourself, and you will find that people will respect you for that. 'Sure, he's honest, he's confident, but he's an ego maniac!' ...to me, that's a compliment, and I'd rather hear that then 'He's a nice guy.'
 

Master Homer

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2004
Messages
151
Reaction score
0
Location
West Palm Beach, FL
for the same reason your not attracted to my grandma

women (and men) are biologically wired to find a suitible mate

men don't get pregnant, so it is in their best interest biologically to procreate with as much women as possible, provided they show signs of "fertility" (eg: large hips, big tits, stuff that you find attractive in a girl)

women's best interest is to find a mate that is able to protect her and her offspring; and a puss wouldn’t be able to.
 

CyranoDeBergerac

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 8, 2002
Messages
1,148
Reaction score
5
Location
Camp Pendleton, Ca
Its simple really...

Call it the gentic imperative.

Women need a man who can hunt food and provide for her and her progeny as well as fend off a sabretooth or three every once in a while.

In a correlating question...why do men tend to be drawn to and generally have more respect for (even if they're not sexually attracted to) confident men? As a man, if you have to take on a pack of sabretooth tigers, or fend off mauraders from another village, who do you want by your side in that fight?

Read Robert wright's book 'The Moral Animal'. Its good stuff and will go a bit more in depth. A fascinating read.

-CyranoDeBergerac
 

JB101

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 4, 2004
Messages
99
Reaction score
0
Yeah, it's all rooted in biology. Women love tall guys. Is it because they like looking up at them? It comes back to confidence. Tall guys are automatically assumed to be confident and to be a protector.

Everything that men do comes down to confidence:

Making eye contact
Approaching her
Asking her out
Kino
Being tall and muscular
Getting down on one knee and asking for marriage
Initiating sex
Being C&F
Being hard to get

It all means the same thing.
 

DJ_Dork

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 29, 2003
Messages
1,180
Reaction score
0
Age
46
Why are women attracted to confidence? How about " Why are people attracted to confidence? " - If you were on a road trip that was going to be 5 hours to somewhere, would you trust the guy that was going drive "winging it" or some guy who had a map. One guy knows what to do and one guy is just chancing it. You'd want to be with the person that knows what to do.
 

ematsuda

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
80
Reaction score
0
The kind of confidence that works for me is the "take it or leave it" attitude. If you project the message that says "I can replace you if I have to", women think this is very attractive. I've been told I do this by a girl I dated as a matter of fact.

Men's Health Magazine had an article on a so called master seducer. In that article some woman said "There's something very sexy about someone who can take you or leave you". I believe this with a passion.

Who was it that said "I don't chase 'em, I replace 'em"?
 

InLawsHateMe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2002
Messages
1,165
Reaction score
0
Location
Columbus, Ohio USA
Give you an example of waht confidence can do.... over the weekend, with my gf, and our baby... she talks me into going with her to a 'Pampered Chef' party(?) Never again dude.... ....I wasn't thrilled, but she promised me there would be food, and booze there, so I went... we get there, a few honies at the attendance, mixed in with some older women.... a few guys there, some bf's of some of the honies there, and their babies too.... anyway, I'm sitting there with my gf, and everyone's listening to this guy trying to sell them cooking wares, and when he asked if we had any questions, I asked 'Where is the booze? My gf tricked me!!! She f'n tricked me!!!!' and the once silent crowd of people burst out in laughter... since the suggestion of booze was brought up, the woman who owned the house (my gf's friend) broke out some wines..... it wasn't long before all eyes were on me.... a few smiles here, and few laughs there, and they want to be around you.... one woman told me, with my gf standing right there, she says 'I'm going to take you home.' I easily retort with, 'I'm not part of what's for sale here tonight, I cost a lot more.' :) she was just ummmm, a little too old for me...... I turn to my gf, the same one who constantly reminds me that I'm an ego maniac, the same one that KNOWS I get hit on, but also knows that I love her, and only her... I turn to her, and she smiles, shakes her head, and only rolls her eyes at me. :) I was easily bored......

On the way home, my gf was so turned on by my confidence, she stroekd me through my pants all the way home.... God's honest truth.... for real... I mean I could have said, 'oh we were at a cool party and a... chics were hitting on me.' but we weren't at a cool party, it was a Pampered Chef party... I'm not proud to say I was at a Pampered Chef party, but like everything else I said, it was the truth. *shrugs*

Confidence.... they can smell it, if you got it..... it's like crack to them sometimes... they want to be around it......
 

balengar

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2003
Messages
51
Reaction score
0
Location
Texas
exactly what i said in another post.....CHICKS CAN SMELL CONFIDENCE like you can smell a skunk far away......its sometimes so strong its overpowering.
 

Juan_Man

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2001
Messages
1,102
Reaction score
28
I think confidence is somewhat overrated. No one is confident all the time. We all have insecurities, whether we like to admit it or not. Women realize this once they remove the aura we have around ourselves and really get to know us. I think what makes a man confident is his ability to cover up his insecurities. But he won't be able to cover them for long.
 

becker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 13, 2003
Messages
1,697
Reaction score
4
To me confidence seems to come down to whether the guy has guts to go talk to the girl or not. After that, it's almost all downhill. Most girls are sick of guys who have no guts to approach them.
 

PlayerSupreme

Banned
Joined
Jan 15, 2004
Messages
140
Reaction score
0
Age
65
Location
Sacramento
Originally posted by Dirtheart
You're right. Next time I operate on my date, I'll have to remember that. hehe. ;)

But I know what you mean by that. But if that's all there was to it, wouldn't women just go for the toughest and roughest S.O.B they could find?
They do. Thats why jerks get the chicks and modest guy get to sit and listen to the women whine about how bad the jerk is treating them.

Now if you could combine some of the qualities of a jerk into your persona then you got a winner.

Now take humanity back 10,000 years ago...go back even further for countless generations.

We lived in small groups and tribes. Your a woman. Which male should you let be the father of your children (oh your instinctively programmed for this)

1. The tough hunter who swaggers around beating his chest in front of the other males and brings home the bacon and is one of the toughest fighters in the group.

2. The modest male who is quiet and un-assuming and non threatening...and may or may not be able to defend your home from intruders...

Think if women had chosen the #2 guy...would humanity be here today if #2 guys were allowed to breed? Hell no. #2 guys get the left overs....the scraps...the broken down women that nobody wants...

#2 guys these days get to sit and hold an womans hands and commiserate with her about how bad the version of #1 guy is treating her.

#2 guys get to rub her feet and rub her shoulders while she wails on and on about #1

#2 guys get to hope that one day she will see how nice he is and modest he is and un aggressive he can be since that is what those magazines say that women want these days-even though they forgot about to mention what they are naturally attracted to-...anyways one day hope that if he rubs her feet and head and shoulders one day....just maybe ....hopefully...maybe please lord let me just give that angel one kiss from me...

mean while #1 guy is sticking his dyck in her bum and making her take it like a good girl does...making her shout with glee in the middle of the night...making her buy his groceries and help him with his problems...

I personally think #2 guys suck muddy water. Not how I want to live my life.

As most of you know I'm the #1 type. As can be seen by the recently banned Joey the 37 slices of baloney.

Incase you were following the argument I sent The Bad assed Canadian the name my hotel room was under incase he wanted to check it. Since I trusted him after his comments.

I'm home from my vacation early cause of trouble in my paradise which I am handling "all due to that photo with me and the old woman" but it's been delt with.

When ho's get mad at you don't turn into #2's or you will lose her respect and she will no longer follow your lead. Remain #1's at all times and they will bow down as is their place.
And has been since the beginning of time...

To bad society is all fawked up and off balance with the natural order of things these days. That is why men come here to help get some power back.
 

PlayerSupreme

Banned
Joined
Jan 15, 2004
Messages
140
Reaction score
0
Age
65
Location
Sacramento
Originally posted by Slickster
Are you really for real?

How would it make you feel if you were boarding an airplane and the pilot was all fidgety and nervous as hell?

How would you feel going to the hospital for surgery and the doctor comes in looking like a total putz who doesn't have a clue what he's doing?

You wouldn't feel safe would you?

Women like confident men because they feel safe around them.

The concept goes back to cave man days.
Thumbs up!
 

PlayerSupreme

Banned
Joined
Jan 15, 2004
Messages
140
Reaction score
0
Age
65
Location
Sacramento
Originally posted by balengar
exactly what i said in another post.....CHICKS CAN SMELL CONFIDENCE like you can smell a skunk far away......its sometimes so strong its overpowering.
This is so fawking true. They are drawn to it like flys to shyt.
 

InLawsHateMe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2002
Messages
1,165
Reaction score
0
Location
Columbus, Ohio USA
Originally posted by PlayerSupreme
exactly what i said in another post.....CHICKS CAN SMELL CONFIDENCE like you can smell a skunk far away......its sometimes so strong its overpowering. -balengar



This is so fawking true. They are drawn to it like flys to shyt.


It stinks so good huh fellas? LOL!!!!!!!

......if you guys say so... personally, my confidence smells like MONEY. ;) ....or sexual chocolate. :) ..only flies I'll attract are fly honies.... sounds like you both can use a shower and some soap pimpins. :) ...ya'll be attracting buzzards and flies and sh*t... LOL!
 
Last edited:

InLawsHateMe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2002
Messages
1,165
Reaction score
0
Location
Columbus, Ohio USA
Originally posted by Juan_Man
I think confidence is somewhat overrated. No one is confident all the time. We all have insecurities, whether we like to admit it or not. Women realize this once they remove the aura we have around ourselves and really get to know us. I think what makes a man confident is his ability to cover up his insecurities. But he won't be able to cover them for long.
Somewhat overrated? As compared to what? Sounds like you ain't too sure bro... I don't think you truly know... I mean, you talking about how 'Women realize this once they remove the aura we have around ourselves'... what aura are you talking about? You mean a front? Like we are acting it out, until they discover that we are just pretending? ...maybe that's how you are working it, not me bro... let me share something with you.... if you can't be true to yourself, and to others, who the hell wants to be with a fake? .....I'll tell ya... NO ONE. ....you either be yourself, rtust in yourself, and your confidence, and bring it for real, or you don't.... that smoke and mirrors crap may work for a few weeks, and if you are crafty enough, even a few months, but in the end, the truth always comes out... with me, what you see is what you get. There is no smoke and mirrors, there is nothing 'up my sleeves'... you can't pretend to have confidence, there is no covering up anything. If you are confident, you are confident.... and when you are... confident... which also means, you trust yourself, your opinions, your decisions, good and bad... people will want to be with you... they will want, to stay with you, for long periods of time, not weeks, or months..... a confident man, has no insecurities, OR doesn't know if he truly has any... *shrugs* ..he just doesn't believe he has any..... To say
I think what makes a man confident is his ability to cover up his insecurities.
has got to be the lamest thing I've ever read.... that's like saying Hugh Hefner is the worlds' biggest bullsh*tter... Hefner must have a lot of insecurities, walking around all day in a robe, in a house full of naked women.... that's crazy... Bottomline is.....

CONFIDENCE IS NOT OVERRATED.... IT IS YOUR KEY TO SUCCESS, NOT JUST WITH WOMEN, BUT LIFE. LEARN IT, KNOW IT, LIVE IT.

Insecurities, jealousy, combined with lack of confidence, will always keep you down... eliminate those traits from your personailty, and stop being a cherry.
 
Top