Why are people against improvement? A rant

[BeExcellent]

Another thing. To lead is to be alone. Once you start to break out of the status quo, everyone around you are like crabs in the bucket trying to pull you back in. Some friendships have to die so you can evolve into something better.

Advice from the old lady: This is a great thread and is just as true now as it’s ever been. As you progress in life, if you are growing, you actually outgrow some friendships. Sometimes you leave family behind too. You have to. Your vibrational energy changes as you change. People who *think* they are better than you where you were, who don’t cheer you on? They are garbage. But the few who stick around and are real friends as you grow? Those people are gold.

 

[Ricky]

Did OP ever get muscular?

i remember him back in the day. I have no idea what he is up to now. I left the board before him… but obviously been back due to marriage issues on my end. I never lost a love for the game, i just was semi-retired for many years.

 

[Ricky]

Advice from the old lady: This is a great thread and is just as true now as it’s ever been. As you progress in life, if you are growing, you actually outgrow some friendships. Sometimes you leave family behind too. You have to. Your vibrational energy changes as you change. People who *think* they are better than you where you were, who don’t cheer you on? They are garbage. But the few who stick around and are real friends as you grow? Those people are gold.

Great post. I agree BeExcellent. The weird part ive found in life is that no matter how close a friend is… the choice to change habits is always up to them. I feel like i could influence friends to make changes and better habits but its really the old leading a horse to water doesnt mean you can make them drink….

and most of my friends are the horses that like to drink alot haha.

 

[sangheilios]

i remember him back in the day. I have no idea what he is up to now. I left the board before him… but obviously been back due to marriage issues on my end. I never lost a love for the game, i just was semi-retired for many years.

This thread is from 2002 lol, over 20 years ago. Crazy to see an old post on here from so long ago, and not only that but see a member from 2002 posting on here more recently.

 

[SargeMaximus]

i remember him back in the day. I have no idea what he is up to now. I left the board before him… but obviously been back due to marriage issues on my end. I never lost a love for the game, i just was semi-retired for many years.

Must be nice. I tried the game and couldn’t get it to work for me. So I went my own way and got laid. Kind of radicalized me tbh

 

[BoomToTheMoonAlice]

Must be nice. I tried the game and couldn’t get it to work for me. So I went my own way and got laid. Kind of radicalized me tbh

This is the way

 

[Manure Spherian]

Though I think some men getting the most out of themselves is a good thing, I also believe the whole notion of others trying to hinder others’ self-improvement projects is highly exaggerated and an attention grabber.

Most people tending to things in their own lives, no matter how mundane and routine they are, do not give a rat’s as$ that some guy work outs (in some cases 20 years late, after becoming a middle-aged fat body), studying, or professionally excelling. In some cases they might even think he would be better off doing something else.

It’s a common trope used amongst internet celebrities in particular. Hence one sees posts like, “I didn’t let anyone tell me I couldn’t do it!,” when likely no one cared about what they did, or in some cases looked down upon it.

 

[Lean Baby Face]

Must be nice. I tried the game and couldn’t get it to work for me. So I went my own way and got laid. Kind of radicalized me tbh

I think some personality types can end up getting too analytical when gaming which ends up taking from their authenticity and own unique qualities which can negatively impact their approaching, as women may end up thinking you're just another lonely loser eager for sex because you got no real character or personality exactly like what you're showcasing while approaching.

Game shouldn't be about changing yourself into someone you're not. It's just about developing the necessary skills.

 

[jhonny9546]

People sense your strength and it starts to tick them off.

So, accept, that being strong is going to lead to increased attacks against you. The bigger your ego is the more defense you have to operate. People will try to bring you down, and when they figure out that they can't they'll get dirty and they'll gang up.

Yes! There are also "**** tests" to pass with a masculine frame. In fact, if you are in a long-term relationship with a woman and she sees that you are constantly improving, she will be attracted to that. However, what if you encounter an obstacle to tackle that takes time? She may lose interest in you, and while you're thinking about a new strategy to finally overcome that obstacle, she might give you several **** tests.

For example, you could be studying because you want to change careers, and your woman might say something like, "Why are you still at that job?" or "You are so intelligent; there are people like you out there in the Big Four or who are entrepreneurs, and many less capable individuals have better job positions than yours. Why are you still at that job?" said with a malicious tone..

Which is the correct way to reply to this, keeping the good masculine frame?


This can happen in many other social scenarios, like other people **** testing you, after you've done some improvement, not only in your looks.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

For example, you could be studying because you want to change careers, and your woman might say something like, "Why are you still at that job?" or "You are so intelligent; there are people like you out there in the Big Four or who are entrepreneurs, and many less capable individuals have better job positions than yours. Why are you still at that job?" said with a malicious tone..

Sounds like you're dating the wrong women, dude. Date a better class of women.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Sounds like you're dating the wrong women, dude. Date a better class of women.

....and what country do you suggest he move to? Dude's in Italy.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

....and what country do you suggest he move to? Dude's in Italy.

He doesn't need to move, why are you suggesting other countries? There are classy Italian women and there are trashy ones. Don't date the trashy ones.

All these mental acrobatics in order to justify not dating people. Just readjust your standards and find a better class of women to date. And if you need to level up to reach that goal, this forum is there to give you advice and teach you how to respect yourself enough to get rid of people disrespecting you.

 

[Gamisch]

He doesn't need to move, why are you suggesting other countries? There are classy Italian women and there are trashy ones. Don't date the trashy ones.

All these mental acrobatics in order to justify not dating people. Just readjust your standards and find a better class of women to date. And if you need to level up to reach that goal, this forum is there to give you advice and teach you how to respect yourself enough to get rid of people disrespecting you.

I really like this post Martyn!

Despite it being contradictory to your view in your latest thread about the master don Juan title or not.

I say that because imo THIS is the only way to go for men nowadays. Because you can chase low level women (and get some with TONS of struggle and effort) those same women will keep you down and away from that "better class" you talk about.

So basically the most sound advice for most men who struggle with women is to level the eff up! Doesn't matter if dude has game or not. With enough improvement most men will attract the dimes in their niches more easily .

At this point the forum should be way more about finances, style, and fitness. The redpill/ manosphere needs a drastic make over!

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Despite it being contradictory to your view in your latest thread about the master don Juan title or not.

Where is the contradiction?

 

[Dr_jitsu]

Im in part asking advice and in part ranting...so excuse the long thread

Ever since ive come to the conclusion that my life was not going how i wanted, Ive been trying to change...to improve. Finding this site has been a huge part of my self improvement...not only do i feel more comfortable (and competent) around women, ive also improve on MOST of my other relationships.

However, ive started getting a lot of comments from my friends and family, and i was wondering if any of you have gotten similiar responses.

One of the things ive been doing to improve myself is weightlifting and excercise. However, my family has really been dumpin on me about this, and i cant figure out why..

Brother "why the hell are you trying..your never gonna be pumped" (hes bigger than me..im skinny and not very muscular...but im trying...)

Mom: "why are you spending so much time on that stuff..your all right the way you are" (i only go about an hour a day, 5 times a week..and, again, skinny)

Cousin "Why are you trying so hard to make girls like you?" (That is NOT what im doing...at least not the only reason, and SHE is overweight).

Not only that, but im not AT ALL a doormat anymore, and i say what i mean. I am a bit paranoid, due to past experiences, about people trying to control me, so i dont let them anymore. And ive been getting a ton of respect from people i meet. Since ive begun my DJ change, ive advanced in my studies and work. However, my friends and family havent responded well...

My AFC friends really resent me. Im dating two girl...and theyre constantly telling me how im a player, and an a$$hole for seeing two girls (ive told the 2 girls im non exclusive right now and im not "playing" them at all). Not only that, they keep ramming their AFC advice down my throat, even though I HAVE gf, and they dont...whereas i NEVER put them down for theyre "lack of luck".

My two brothers, one of them a total AFC and the other a natural DJ with a lot of AFC tendencies keep telling me that im never gonna be happy. They both have long term girlfriends (one has only ever had the 1 gf)keep trying to give me advice on girls. Whenever i argue with them and tell them i dont need their stupid advice, they point out their gf and say "look at us, we have girlfriend for a long time and you dont" Their gfs are particularly attractive and theyre whipped, but they still feel it necessary to point out my faults!

My girl-friends are telling me they dont like the new me (some of them bluntly). It god so bad that i asked one of them, that if i went back to being the old me, if she would fvck my brains out. She slapped me. We are still friends now (and weve actually made out some times since then

) but not very "close"

The rest of family has also been berating me about my new attitude. They keep telling me that with my views now, ill never have a girl. Which flies in the face of facts, as i had NO girlfriends before the change.

Why the hell is everyone so determined to stop me from improving? Im doing better at school, i have more friends, and for once in my life, im happy. Do you guys ever get this stuff? I dont know what to do..its getting on my nerves, and i just cant NEXT my families and friends!

Id like to hear you stories and your advice, fellow DJs

Pancho

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If all men were created equal, then how is it im better? --Pancho

[This message has been edited by Pancho (edited 06-03-2002).]

22 year old post, but if OP were here today I would tell him this:

Pancho, I wanted to jump in because it is important. You are absolutely 100% doing the right thing, and don't let ANYBODY deter you from self improvement. Bodybuilding will TREMENDOUSLY increase your value, you just have to combine it with personal growth.

I received similar negative feedback from my mother (RIP) who did not even come and see me when I won the Mr San Francisco bodybuilding contest 30 years ago. My grandmother said "boy you look mutated."

Most people live lives of mediocrity. There is a war against men, especially young men. The only way we can fight back is through constant self improvement.

Keep working, striving, growing...and let bodybuilding be a life long pursuit. It will continue to pay dividends.

 

[Dr_jitsu]

i remember him back in the day. I have no idea what he is up to now. I left the board before him… but obviously been back due to marriage issues on my end. I never lost a love for the game, i just was semi-retired for many years.

You can never retire...even decades into a marriage. The fundamental principles of seduction (getting a woman to love you/raising interest level) are the same, regardless of short or long run. The male mind is designed to solve a problem and then move onto another problem. That is great for building civilizations, but does not work with women. Women...even once a problem is solved want to "improve it...keep messing with it" because their minds are process oriented. That is their view on relationships. They are a never ending process for women, and when men forget this their interest levels drop.