Why are higher quality women more interested in me than low quality women?

[jnMissouri]

I have an advanced degree. I'm tech management. I own multiple rentals in one of the most expensive markets in the country. I have a high net worth. I'm an 8.5 in looks, funny/playful personality.

On the dating site POF, while I get dates with attractive women younger or similar age as me, it's much more of a numbers game than the place I'll mention below. But the majority of them, even the middle aged, multiple divorcee's, multiple kids working at minimum wage jobs...won't drive 30 minutes to meet me or our conversation quickly fizzles out despite positive responses.

So I got on a high net worth dating site. I got my profile verified/certified (income/net worth and photo). Now there are a lot of the same kind of women that are on POF on the HNW site trolling to meet a rich guy. They expect a multi millionaire who has never married or had kids, etc. to travel across the country to meet a 45 year old women nearly a decade older than him, living in poverty working at a restaurant and having had multiple kids from multiple men. But yet I have found it EASIER to date women that are HNW and young/attractive on that site than the lower end women not only on this site but POF. I mean almost every women who is HNW on there that I message we talk, or date. Most of them date. And when I say date, I've flown to see some, others have flown to see me. Even recently I had a woman who is about 10 years younger than me, well off and a solid 9 travel at her own expense across the country spending the weekend with me and forming a relationship with me at the end of the weekend, like me she has never married or had kids. Meanwhile the vast majority of women I hit on either on POF or even the HNW dating site that are NOT wealthy and put together, have little interest, even knowing I'm wealthy. I mean I get a lot of messages from them, but they quickly fizzle out or are not willing to put in ANY effort to meet. While high quality women do.

tl;dr: why are high quality women so much more interested in me vs lower quality women? You would think the lower quality women would be putting in more effort, especially on a website they get on to specifically meet affluent men?

 

[Visionist]

What kind of photos do you have up on your dating profiles? Professional photos are important as they look "official" and give you a "VIP" allure.

Have the obligatory shirtless beach photo if you're ripped, preferably on an exotic beach with palm trees somewhere. A picture in a club where you look like you're enjoying yourself/dominating the social environment. Driving an exotic car. At the top of a mountain, etc, etc. For an example this is a club photo taken of me, eleven years ago though:



It's all about conveying a fun, action man playboy lifestyle, if you wanna present yourself to women in that way.

 

[BaldandBrazy88]

Here are my thoughts brother, with our any disrespect whatsoever.. you might be f**ing up at some point of the conversation, plain and simple.
To answer the other question, that one is easy, they LL date lessser value man for the solely fact that they know they won't have to compete with other girls " I'm the best he'll ever had" type of mentality ( of course she will f*ck the alpha if she comes across one). With that being said my friend, your looks, the money, all of it might be playing against you (funny ain't it) if the 8/9 you re dating is INSECURE ( as most of em are) so I'll say, play the sheep, until she find you a damn wolf

 

[Ohso-Phresh]

I have an advanced degree. I'm tech management. I own multiple rentals in one of the most expensive markets in the country. I have a high net worth. I'm an 8.5 in looks, funny/playful personality.

On the dating site POF, while I get dates with attractive women younger or similar age as me, it's much more of a numbers game than the place I'll mention below. But the majority of them, even the middle aged, multiple divorcee's, multiple kids working at minimum wage jobs...won't drive 30 minutes to meet me or our conversation quickly fizzles out despite positive responses.

So I got on a high net worth dating site. I got my profile verified/certified (income/net worth and photo). Now there are a lot of the same kind of women that are on POF on the HNW site trolling to meet a rich guy. They expect a multi millionaire who has never married or had kids, etc. to travel across the country to meet a 45 year old women nearly a decade older than him, living in poverty working at a restaurant and having had multiple kids from multiple men. But yet I have found it EASIER to date women that are HNW and young/attractive on that site than the lower end women not only on this site but POF. I mean almost every women who is HNW on there that I message we talk, or date. Most of them date. And when I say date, I've flown to see some, others have flown to see me. Even recently I had a woman who is about 10 years younger than me, well off and a solid 9 travel at her own expense across the country spending the weekend with me and forming a relationship with me at the end of the weekend, like me she has never married or had kids. Meanwhile the vast majority of women I hit on either on POF or even the HNW dating site that are NOT wealthy and put together, have little interest, even knowing I'm wealthy. I mean I get a lot of messages from them, but they quickly fizzle out or are not willing to put in ANY effort to meet. While high quality women do.

tl;dr: why are high quality women so much more interested in me vs lower quality women? You would think the lower quality women would be putting in more effort, especially on a website they get on to specifically meet affluent men?

They screen themselves out as being un-qualified. Men do it too when confronted with a woman they perceive to be ‘out of his league’.

 

[R.U.G.]

I have an advanced degree. I'm tech management. I own multiple rentals in one of the most expensive markets in the country. I have a high net worth. I'm an 8.5 in looks, funny/playful personality.

On the dating site POF, while I get dates with attractive women younger or similar age as me, it's much more of a numbers game than the place I'll mention below. But the majority of them, even the middle aged, multiple divorcee's, multiple kids working at minimum wage jobs...won't drive 30 minutes to meet me or our conversation quickly fizzles out despite positive responses.

So I got on a high net worth dating site. I got my profile verified/certified (income/net worth and photo). Now there are a lot of the same kind of women that are on POF on the HNW site trolling to meet a rich guy. They expect a multi millionaire who has never married or had kids, etc. to travel across the country to meet a 45 year old women nearly a decade older than him, living in poverty working at a restaurant and having had multiple kids from multiple men. But yet I have found it EASIER to date women that are HNW and young/attractive on that site than the lower end women not only on this site but POF. I mean almost every women who is HNW on there that I message we talk, or date. Most of them date. And when I say date, I've flown to see some, others have flown to see me. Even recently I had a woman who is about 10 years younger than me, well off and a solid 9 travel at her own expense across the country spending the weekend with me and forming a relationship with me at the end of the weekend, like me she has never married or had kids. Meanwhile the vast majority of women I hit on either on POF or even the HNW dating site that are NOT wealthy and put together, have little interest, even knowing I'm wealthy. I mean I get a lot of messages from them, but they quickly fizzle out or are not willing to put in ANY effort to meet. While high quality women do.

tl;dr: why are high quality women so much more interested in me vs lower quality women? You would think the lower quality women would be putting in more effort, especially on a website they get on to specifically meet affluent men?

Define how these women are of higher quality than you?

Why do you look down upon yourself?

Why do you pedestalize women?

 

[jnMissouri]

If your complaint is that you're attracting more women who don't want to put out right away, and who are more interested in marriage, as opposed to women who just wanna f uck your brains out...the difference isn't necessarily them, but how they see you.

A woman who sees you as a good husband prospect is more likely to present herself to you as a good wife prospect. On the other hand, if you don't have anything to offer her but a good time, she's more likely to present herself to you as a party girl.

This isn't to say that there's zero difference, nor that there aren't too separate and distinct categories, but that you should view it as a Venn Diagram, in which a good portion of these girls could go either way, depending on how YOU present yourself.

If you just wanna have fun, then I'd suggest that you should stop advertising stability, and start advertising adventure.

No it's a question:
Why are higher quality women more interested in me than low quality women?

I'm trying to figure out the dynamic in hopes of it giving me an edge or just even understanding it. It might provide insight into attraction; figuring out why some lower end women have no interest in me, but most of the higher end women have high interest to the point of traveling and spending money to see me.

And there is sex involved with most of them upon meeting.

 

[jnMissouri]

Define how these women are of higher quality than you?

Why do you look down upon yourself?

Why do you pedestalize women?

I didn't say they were higher quality than me, I said they are HIGH quality women. But some of these chics have more money than ME at the same age and are HOT. Nor did I say I pedestalize women or look down on myself. I asked why I do better with higher quality girls than lower quality girls. You'd think the lower quality girls would leap at the chance to be with a guy like me. But it turns out I have that happen more with higher quality girls who have even more options than the lower quality girls. But then again they don't want most of those options....

 

[jnMissouri]

They screen themselves out as being un-qualified. Men do it too when confronted with a woman they perceive to be ‘out of his league’.

I wonder if this IS it....self esteem issues? I had two lower quality but attractive girls say that to me last year: you are too good to be true. You're perfect, why would you want to be with me, etc.

Because you're hot and the sex is good and I view this as temporary...lol. Maybe your theory is right.

 

[jnMissouri]

Taking a second, more reflective(as opposed to reflexive) look at your question....I have no clue.

I know nothing about OLD, but if you're happy with the women who ARE expressing interest and making an effort, why look a gifthorse in the mouth? Unless you just have a fetish for delusional truckstop waitresses, with multiple baby-daddies, why go slumming, if you don't really need to?

I see no problem, unless you left out something important.

No no no, I'm not complaining. I'm trying to figure out a piece of the attraction puzzle. WHY do attractive younger or similar aged women who are worth equal or MORE money than me willing to travel and bend over backwards to meet me, sex, etc. But yet low grade middle aged trash on POF that is undesirable for anything other than sex (multiple divorces, kids, poor, low end job, etc.) can't be bothered to meet me halfway (30 min drive)....

Group A has it all and can have ANY guy they want....yet bend over backwards to meet and **** me.

Groub B has fading looks and a lot of unwanted bagged, bascially a depreciating asset....yet most of them fizzle out quickly just in messaging online....

You'd think Group B would be more interested in the opportunity most guys at my level wouldn't give them....you know that saying, the'll fool around with the bad boy but they'll get married to the educated guy with money and stability....strangely that has NOT been my experience....

Though I think I just realized something while typing this. I did better with just random sex when I wasn't as successful, well in some ways. It seems like it was easier then but that could just have been platforms (myspace and such) at the time, that are no longer what they used to be. And it's not like I have done statistical analysis on the numbers there. But I do know I get higher quality women now while the lower quality ones are just meh....

 

[jnMissouri]

What kind of photos do you have up on your dating profiles? Professional photos are important as they look "official" and give you a "VIP" allure.

Have the obligatory shirtless beach photo if you're ripped, preferably on an exotic beach with palm trees somewhere. A picture in a club where you look like you're enjoying yourself/dominating the social environment. Driving an exotic car. At the top of a mountain, etc, etc. For an example this is a club photo taken of me, eleven years ago though:

View attachment 4079

It's all about conveying a fun, action man playboy lifestyle, if you wanna present yourself to women in that way.

I use the same pictures on both profiles (though I don't use POF anymore). They are me shirtless (I'm muscular), on a Jet Ski in Hawaii, in Alaska having a good time, in Paris in front of the Eiffel tower, in London at the bridge, etc.

I don't drive a fancy car, I actually drive a cheaper car than my broke friends. They all have newer 20K cars, I drive a car I paid 5K for on Craigslist...a 10 year old Toyota...

I thought about buying a Lambo in cash a while ago, but I didn't. I just can't get myself to blow money on stupid stuff like that yet. I have a couple mil, but it's not like it's 50 mil where I can buy jet's and not blink.

I dated a girl in LA for a while who was worth 6 mil. She spends 500K a year. Was looking to get domesticated as she put it, be a house wife, have kids. I was like, I can't really afford your lifestyle and build assets...

The girl who flew to meet me recently wore a gold Rolex watch. It had to be 20-30K. I asked her about it and she tried to cover it up and asked what kind of watch I wear...a Casio sports watch lol. She wore expensive Louis Vuitton shoes (sp?). I'm wary of lifestyle inflation. Some people come into money and they end up spending like crazy and go broke. They say 80% of lotto winners and NFL players are broke within 5 years of retiring. People don't understand cash flow when it comes to money. If you spend more than your investments pay in, you can't keep spending like crazy and expect to keep building wealth. So I keep buy real estate to build my assets for the long term. That has really paid off over the last 10 years....can't wait to see 20-30 year results though I will be a senior citizen by then...

 

[Lumix]

Women don't have that many ways to secure their relationships. Good look, spreading their legs wide and often, playful and sweet personality, being good housewives, etc... If they already know that they will be in constant fear if they fall for you, they quickly give up or they just can't rationalize why in the first place you'd be interested in them. They know right away that they are just for the s3x. Also because they cannot relate to you in any way, they are not from the same world.

A lot of women often ask me why I still don't have kids, why am I still not married, etc... They just don't get it. What they ask is "why is that man interested in me when there is nothing I can offer him except my vagina?" or maybe also they find it weird that you are still childless and maybe they think it's because you have too high expectations that they will never match.

But well, too much overthinking, I guess if you know what you want, you will go fishing in the right river.

 

[zekko]

A woman who sees you as a good husband prospect is more likely to present herself to you as a good wife prospect. On the other hand, if you don't have anything to offer her but a good time, she's more likely to present herself to you as a party girl.

Yeah, this is why I've never understood why guys here get so butthurt when a girl is on her best behavior for him. It's a compliment, not an insult. She doesn't see you as a disposable douchebag.

I can understand being frustrated if girls withhold sex because they don't want you to think they're sluts, but it's still not an insult. Anyway, I haven't really experienced this phenomenon. If a girl has high interest in me, she's usually wanting sex.

 

[jnMissouri]

Women don't have that many ways to secure their relationships. Good look, spreading their legs wide and often, playful and sweet personality, being good housewives, etc... If they already know that they will be in constant fear if they fall for you, they quickly give up or they just can't rationalize why in the first place you'd be interested in them. They know right away that they are just for the s3x. Also because they cannot relate to you in any way, they are not from the same world.

A lot of women often ask me why I still don't have kids, why am I still not married, etc... They just don't get it. What they ask is "why is that man interested in me when there is nothing I can offer him except my vagina?" or maybe also they find it weird that you are still childless and maybe they think it's because you have too high expectations that they will never match.

But well, too much overthinking, I guess if you know what you want, you will go fishing in the right river.

I get that. Why have you never gotten married or had kids? It's strange for a man or woman in their late thirties to never have been married or had kids, I get it. But my response is always, why would I? The usual response from a woman is "love". I ask what a contract has to do with love. They have no answer. Why would I sign a contract that says that no matter what you do, cheat on me in my home, etc. you walk with half of what I worked for and built.

Yeah, in almost all the cases of the girls who came to meet me and stayed the weekend, they would do the dishes even, bag up the garbage in the bathrooms, make the bed, fold my clothes...

But even a lot of those eventually ended up going nowhere in the long run. But still a MUCH higher success ration than regular every day women. I'm just trying to figure out what is different between the higher quality successful women and lower quality women who are not long term material and are used up as far as success rations. And why even a lot of the higher quality women relationships go nowhere in the long run. Maybe it's just women's emotions. Maybe I should minimize my contact with them after sleeping with them and make them chase more.

 

[jnMissouri]

Yeah, this is why I've never understood why guys here get so butthurt when a girl is on her best behavior for him. It's a compliment, not an insult. She doesn't see you as a disposable douchebag.

I can understand being frustrated if girls withhold sex because they don't want you to think they're sluts, but it's still not an insult. Anyway, I haven't really experienced this phenomenon. If a girl has high interest in me, she's usually wanting sex.

I've found that women who sleep with you very quickly usually have some kind of personality disorder. I've commented in a few threads of others who have posted about this. Women who give it up quickly and easily usually have borderline personality disorder. They are easy, quick to form relationships and fizzle out just as quickly. When a girl holds out it usually is a better sign. You're not disposable. I actually had a girl that is now an ex tell me that when I asked why women will fling with bad boys but marry the successful guy. Her response. Because the bad boys are disposable, not something they want long term.

But I digress. The best answer I got here so far was that the lower quality women self select out. That does seem to make sense. But to some extent it doesn't explain it all. Even on the HNW dating site, the lower quality women who are on there to meet a rich guy won't lift much of a finger to meet. While the high quality ones have no qualms hopping on a plane to meet.

I just thought of something. Maybe it's like applying to jobs. If you have the education and experience, credentials etc., you don't apply to Walmart as a cashier. You apply to be the VP. I don't know. Maybe I'll never know the answer to this question. I figured it would help me add to the attraction puzzle. But alas, I guess I can just enjoy the "results" of the numbers game. Wish I knew the why behind this though. Maybe it's because the more put together women have a different standard that they select for. I can't imagine a girl worth millions traveling to meet a guy who works at McDonalds as a member of the grill team.

 

[jnMissouri]

I just thought of something. This isn't limited to just women and dating. I've noticed I get along better and have more friends at a similar level than lower end friends. Maybe it's a birds of a feather type of thing?

Most of my friends are Dr.'s, Lawyers, business owners, CTO's, VP's, etc. I do have some long time friends that are still on the lower tier of income but they are actually intelligent people overall, just not so driven, so we stayed friends. Perhaps this is a birds of a feather thing. I imagine not a lot of McDonalds fry cooks would want to hang out with me listening to me talk about real estate, investing and microeconomics. Come to think of it many of the women I dated on the HNW site were fellow real estate investors. Maybe it really is chemistry, birds of a feather....

I wish I knew. I feel like this is a huge piece of the puzzle, the answer to which would aid me in dating.

 

[zekko]

I asked why women will fling with bad boys but marry the successful guy. Her response. Because the bad boys are disposable, not something they want long term.

To be honest, I'm not usually even interested in the lowlife girls myself. A lot of guys here will take them on as plates, but that seems kind of desperate to me. These same guys will complain about beta guys rewarding women's bad behavior with attention, but they're essentially doing the same thing, they're rewarding them with sex. Can't get much more attentive than that.

 

[jnMissouri]

Here are my thoughts brother, with our any disrespect whatsoever.. you might be f**ing up at some point of the conversation, plain and simple.
To answer the other question, that one is easy, they LL date lessser value man for the solely fact that they know they won't have to compete with other girls " I'm the best he'll ever had" type of mentality ( of course she will f*ck the alpha if she comes across one). With that being said my friend, your looks, the money, all of it might be playing against you (funny ain't it) if the 8/9 you re dating is INSECURE ( as most of em are) so I'll say, play the sheep, until she find you a damn wolf

****ing up how? I've reviewed my texts and messages on the sites, doing the David D C/F, not needy, etc. I don't see where I'd be fing up. I think that might just be a numbers game issue in general. I did date and have sex with attractive women on POF when I used it. Come to think of it I usually ended up sleeping with the more attractive (bust still low quality) ones I went out with.

There is a video on the farfromaverage youtube channel where the guy talks about Rolex watches and fancy cars will work against you for the EXACT reason you said. And I've had multiple women I was in relationships with try to dissuade me from buying them for that reason...it attracts competition and they become insecure.

I have a high "close" ratio and I at least kiss every girl I go on a date with. My conversion ratio is also high. Most of the women I sleep with convert to gf or want to convert to gf.

I don't know, maybe I need to take a break from dating and reflect. I don't even know what I want honestly. The girl I started dating recently seems like marriage material, but do I really want to get married....and she wants kids, I really would rather not have kids. Open to it, but....it's not something I look forward to, having screaming kids, something that ties up travel, career, etc.

I feel like I date just to date. One experience or adventure after another. Then I end up falling hard and fast, and when it inevitably doesn't work out, I get down....but then a few months later I'm into someone else and the whole cycle starts again...

 

[jnMissouri]

To be honest, I'm not usually even interested in the lowlife girls myself. A lot of guys here will take them on as plates, but that seems kind of desperate to me. These same guys will complain about beta guys rewarding women's bad behavior with attention, but they're essentially doing the same thing, they're rewarding them with sex. Can't get much more attentive than that.

There is a guy on YouTube, 33secrets who talks about this. Don't date loser women, less is more, focus on quality not quantity. That said I think it was good to practice on lower quality girls and learn what NOT to do (be the one to bring up relationships, call or text all the time, or fail to go for the kiss like I used to fail to do when I was younger and ended up getting friend zoned by the third date as a result because I didn't have the confidence to make a move...)

 

[Lumix]

Maybe it really is chemistry, birds of a feather....

I guess chemistry is about discovering how related you are with the girl you date, no? If you are not from the same world, it's not going to click. If what you want is something that clicks.

 

[Seductions_Mad_Scientist]

I have an advanced degree. I'm tech management. I own multiple rentals in one of the most expensive markets in the country. I have a high net worth. I'm an 8.5 in looks, funny/playful personality.

On the dating site POF, while I get dates with attractive women younger or similar age as me, it's much more of a numbers game than the place I'll mention below. But the majority of them, even the middle aged, multiple divorcee's, multiple kids working at minimum wage jobs...won't drive 30 minutes to meet me or our conversation quickly fizzles out despite positive responses.

So I got on a high net worth dating site. I got my profile verified/certified (income/net worth and photo). Now there are a lot of the same kind of women that are on POF on the HNW site trolling to meet a rich guy. They expect a multi millionaire who has never married or had kids, etc. to travel across the country to meet a 45 year old women nearly a decade older than him, living in poverty working at a restaurant and having had multiple kids from multiple men. But yet I have found it EASIER to date women that are HNW and young/attractive on that site than the lower end women not only on this site but POF. I mean almost every women who is HNW on there that I message we talk, or date. Most of them date. And when I say date, I've flown to see some, others have flown to see me. Even recently I had a woman who is about 10 years younger than me, well off and a solid 9 travel at her own expense across the country spending the weekend with me and forming a relationship with me at the end of the weekend, like me she has never married or had kids. Meanwhile the vast majority of women I hit on either on POF or even the HNW dating site that are NOT wealthy and put together, have little interest, even knowing I'm wealthy. I mean I get a lot of messages from them, but they quickly fizzle out or are not willing to put in ANY effort to meet. While high quality women do.

tl;dr: why are high quality women so much more interested in me vs lower quality women? You would think the lower quality women would be putting in more effort, especially on a website they get on to specifically meet affluent men?

No disrespect is meant here my man. Why do you expect womens behaviour to make sense? That's stupid.

I've gotten laid for being a friend of a guy in a band (i.e. doing nothing other than existing in a certain context) and gotten rejected for trying too hard to pick up a specific girl in a bar (i.e. doing too much.)

It never makes causal sense. That's kind of what makes it entertaining.

Cheers,