Why am I attracted to bad girls always?

[Phoenix_5]

Hi friends,
I had a simple query to which I need an answer. Since my early formative years, most of the girls that I have been attracted to turned out to be unfaithful,mean and bad. I m not calling them bad because they rejected me, but because they were mean bvtches. There are other 'good girls' who are well behaved and friendly with me but that inner pull and seduction towards them never exists. Why this attraction towards the bad and repulsion from the good exists in me.... so odd :crazy:

 

[Sofomore]

This is how attraction works. Girls like jerks because they create emotions (good or bad) and draw the girls in. We like bad girls because they're fun and thrilling. Good girls are boring because they don't live a fun lifestyle. It's pretty hard to find a good girl that is also entertaining. It all comes down to properly screening if you're looking for a ltr. Bad girls are good for a one time fvck but they are never worth it for a relationship. My last 2 girlfriends were "bad" girls and that's why I was attracted to them. I learned my lesson and hope to never fall into that trap again. But damn it's hard.

 

[Phoenix_5]

This is how attraction works. Girls like jerks because they create emotions (good or bad) and draw the girls in. We like bad girls because they're fun and thrilling. Good girls are boring because they don't live a fun lifestyle. It's pretty hard to find a good girl that is also entertaining. It all comes down to properly screening if you're looking for a ltr. Bad girls are good for a one time fvck but they are never worth it for a relationship. My last 2 girlfriends were "bad" girls and that's why I was attracted to them. I learned my lesson and hope to never fall into that trap again. But damn it's hard.

Its so odd how the science of attraction works... its not merely an emotional equation but the equation of existence itself.... from the tiniest electrons to the infinite universe...

 

[GotED?]

Look at how your relationship was with your mother.

Most NEEDY and AFC men were raised with mothers who lacked giving affection, or were highly emotionally conflicted.

This brings up men from boyhood who now seek those things which were missing during childhood: AFFECTION and VALIDATION from women.

In addition, they are most FAMILIAR with women who are EMOTIONALLY UNBALANCED, the only way they knew how to relate with women as the mother is the first example of such relationship.

Exodus

 

[Phoenix_5]

A 'good girl' was attracted to me once, she was a rare MM (marriage material) type girl, smart and just like me she enjoyed watching LOTR film series, watching football finals... she was a guy's gal but despite all these good qualities I didn't feel attracted to her. My pals stressed hard on me to go for this chick n that I was lucky etc. but that inner fire and attraction for her wasn't there. I treated her like trash but still shes got feelings for me after eleven years! I have been swallowing stones, when I had a precious pearl beneath my toe. anyways not regretting though... funny how the concept of attraction works! isn't it?

 

[El Payaso]

Look at how your relationship was with your mother.

Most NEEDY and AFC men were raised with mothers who lacked giving affection, or were highly emotionally conflicted.

This brings up men from boyhood who now seek those things which were missing during childhood: AFFECTION and VALIDATION from women.

In addition, they are most FAMILIAR with women who are EMOTIONALLY UNBALANCED, the only way they knew how to relate with women as the mother is the first example of such relationship.

Exodus

Lmao. No. Most needy and AFC men were raised by mom's who showered then with attention not the other way around.

 

[Phoenix_5]

Look at how your relationship was with your mother.

Most NEEDY and AFC men were raised with mothers who lacked giving affection, or were highly emotionally conflicted.

This brings up men from boyhood who now seek those things which were missing during childhood: AFFECTION and VALIDATION from women.

In addition, they are most FAMILIAR with women who are EMOTIONALLY UNBALANCED, the only way they knew how to relate with women as the mother is the first example of such relationship.

Exodus

Not complaining but I have a controlling mother and my relation from childhood was to get her approval...

 

[Mike32ct]

I think guys see bad girls as easier for no strings sex.

The good girl is someone that is SEEN as only putting out in a LTR. It seems like too much work for a F.

I just talking about perception not necessarily reality.

 

[SeymourCake]

What is the relationship with your mother and sister like?

 

[Phoenix_5]

What is the relationship with your mother and sister like?

My mother is a bit controlling and at times criticizes me more rather than motivating while she has the totally opposite approach towards my younger sister. To be honest I m not close and friendly enough with my sis. Shes very limited in communication with me but fine with everyone else. We don't share our thoughts or experiences freely.

 

[GotED?]

My mother is a bit controlling and at times criticizes me more rather than motivating while she has the totally opposite approach towards my younger sister. To be honest I m not close and friendly enough with my sis. Shes very limited in communication with me but fine with everyone else. We don't share our thoughts or experiences freely.

Your background sounds exactly like mine (both mother AND sister). The sister I had always had been jealous of my accomplishments (covertly speaking) and favored by my parents over her, I always felt it but it was never realized until into adulthood.

My mother was also never supportive of my dreams/accomplishments but always has her own fooken opinion on EVERYTHING and thinks she KNOWS EVERYTHING and what she thinks is ALWAYS RIGHT (LOL). She was heavily emotionally unbalanced - I don't think I ever seen her and my father NOT ARGUE for over more than 2-3 days, it was a horrible marriage but my father stuck through it until he died (he was a very awesome man, but with faults as well). They were both VERY attractive people, so the bullsh!t comes as a no brainer. Now a days, my mother would had been NEXTed in a heartbeat LOL - but back in the older generation, the loyaly still was prevalent in men's mentality and women took huge advantage of it.

I spent my entire life up to 38yrs old un-doing the damage they had done - it is smart to look deeply into how you developed your human psyche and undo all the sh!t your family had placed upon you during childhood to become a much better and effective man knowing YOU ARE WONDERFUL HUMAN BEING, AND DO NOT NEED or RELY ON ANYONE TO MAKE YOU FEEL WHOLE.

Be well.

Exodus

 

[skinnyguy]

Your background sounds exactly like mine (both mother AND sister). The sister I had always had been jealous of my accomplishments (covertly speaking) and favored by my parents over her, I always felt it but it was never realized until into adulthood.

My mother was also never supportive of my dreams/accomplishments but always has her own fooken opinion on EVERYTHING and thinks she KNOWS EVERYTHING and what she thinks is ALWAYS RIGHT (LOL). She was heavily emotionally unbalanced - I don't think I ever seen her and my father NOT ARGUE for over more than 2-3 days, it was a horrible marriage but my father stuck through it until he died (he was a very awesome man, but with faults as well). They were both VERY attractive people, so the bullsh!t comes as a no brainer. Now a days, my mother would had been NEXTed in a heartbeat LOL - but back in the older generation, the loyaly still was prevalent in men's mentality and women took huge advantage of it.

I spent my entire life up to 38yrs old un-doing the damage they had done - it is smart to look deeply into how you developed your human psyche and undo all the sh!t your family had placed upon you during childhood to become a much better and effective man knowing YOU ARE WONDERFUL HUMAN BEING, AND DO NOT NEED or RELY ON ANYONE TO MAKE YOU FEEL WHOLE.

Be well.

Exodus

Wow…your mom is almost like mine…narcissistic and emotionally unbalanced…only my parents aren't even remotely attractive lol.

Glad that you worked on yourself to undo the damage. I'm starting on it and i know it will be a long process.