my gf and i have been together for 4 mos. until recently, everything was really really great. but she's started doing some things to annoy me. i, being a dj, joke and tease her all the time. most the time she jokes back. however, some of these times she jokes back, she says something that either hurts my feelings or just plain rubs me the wrong way. when i say something about it like "hey that's not cool" etc, she gets all pissy and says stuff like "well i guess i just can't joke around with you". i don't want her to feel like that, but where do i draw the line? am i being a wuss for caring? this is someone who constantly tells me they love me. i don't think that its cool for my feelings to get hurt, and i don;t think i should have to put up with it. in short, how do you guys deal with disrespect? i realize you might not be able to get a good feel for this by this short little paragraph, but i would really appreciate some other points of view.
where's the line between joking and disrespect?
- Thread starter (JJ)
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The best thing to do is seem unaffected and bring it back to funny territory.
If she disses you hard, just say "Oh, you're on now, woman! Arm wrestling match NOW!" Arm wrestle her and beat her. Then gloat (in a funny way.)
If she does it in front of other people, lean to them and say "She's on this diet that makes her really, really cranky. (then to her) Hows the diet going, baby?"
If she says "What diet?" Say (smile) "Well, that's cool. You always look great to me anyway." Then roll your eyes at your friends. (very subtle diss there.. but do you see how it works?)
If she's really bad, introduce her to some friends as "This is _______, and she wishes she were a man." - That's A BIG HIT.. so be careful.
But on a whole, don't be affected. Have fun..getting riled up is fun. Can you get yourself to a place where the more she "pisses you off" the more turned on you get by her? Chicks love it. (Also, tell her, in a funny way, to "**** off, princess.." She'll love it.
If she disses you hard, just say "Oh, you're on now, woman! Arm wrestling match NOW!" Arm wrestle her and beat her. Then gloat (in a funny way.)
If she does it in front of other people, lean to them and say "She's on this diet that makes her really, really cranky. (then to her) Hows the diet going, baby?"
If she says "What diet?" Say (smile) "Well, that's cool. You always look great to me anyway." Then roll your eyes at your friends. (very subtle diss there.. but do you see how it works?)
If she's really bad, introduce her to some friends as "This is _______, and she wishes she were a man." - That's A BIG HIT.. so be careful.
But on a whole, don't be affected. Have fun..getting riled up is fun. Can you get yourself to a place where the more she "pisses you off" the more turned on you get by her? Chicks love it. (Also, tell her, in a funny way, to "**** off, princess.." She'll love it.
If she's doing with you while you're alone, then don't get mad. Just play back. If she's doing with other people around, she's losing interest. Getting mad won't help you in this case either. Just play like she can't get under your skin, and she shouldn't be able to anyway.
DonGorgon
Master Don Juan
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There is a very very fine line.. but remember every joke is a play on the truth and our insecurities.
thanks guys, i appreciate having other points of view cuz everyone knows its impossible to be unbiased at all times. anyway i really like the arm wrestling thing Dante1a. and another thing i didnt mention was that as soon as she says a lot of these things, she immediately checks to make sure she didnt hurt my feelings.
her: "joke/insult"
her: "did that hurt your feelings?"
me: "anything"
her: "well i really hope it didnt hurt your feelings!"
she tends to get upset by some of the jokes i make too so she seems to have a pretty good idea where the boundary is
her: "joke/insult"
her: "did that hurt your feelings?"
me: "anything"
her: "well i really hope it didnt hurt your feelings!"
she tends to get upset by some of the jokes i make too so she seems to have a pretty good idea where the boundary is
If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
ezily
Senior Don Juan
If you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen.
What do you expect her to do? Sit around and take all your **** (even if you are joking and she knows it) without her saying anything? Come on, man I'm pretty sure based on the things you've said that she really doesn't want you taking this stuff personally. Man up.
What do you expect her to do? Sit around and take all your **** (even if you are joking and she knows it) without her saying anything? Come on, man I'm pretty sure based on the things you've said that she really doesn't want you taking this stuff personally. Man up.